Does a lack of Confidence hold you back in your work, home and social Life? If so you'll love this free guide on Confidence and the really good news is that you're actually more Confident than you think you are. This practical mini guide to Confidence will help you realise this and begin to change how you think about your Confidence and how simple ways how you can develop and begin to build your Confidence.

1. Confidence – What is it and how do you get it?
Part 1: What is confidence?
Confidence means different things to different people, so to get you
thinking here’s the Oxford English dictionary’s definition:
"A feeling of self-assurance arising from an appreciation of
one's own abilities or qualities"
This is actually a very good definition of confidence, it means that
you have a strong belief in yourself about what you’re capable of
doing and to do it successfully. This changes depending on your
situation and perception of confidence at any one time – so
confidence is a state of mind.
Here's an example of what I mean by that. I worked with someone
who told me they "have no confidence", so I replied "OK, who tied
your shoelaces this morning?" He paused, then looked at me in a

2. slightly confused way and said "Well I did of course!" I replied "So,
how confident did you feel about tying your shoelaces?" The man
smiled, then laughed. I knew then, that he understood a little more
about confidence.
Confidence is more than just self belief in yourself, confidence is about
“competence” what I mean by this is doing what you’re good at. The
more competence you have the more self belief you have, after all you
know what you’re doing. When you’re having a conversation and
catching up with friends, you probably have no problem in having a
conversation, you know what to say and when to laugh – this is
competence, which results in confidence.
Competence makes up most of what people refer to as “confidence,” the
rest is made up of self belief. When you’re truly confident, you feel
comfortable in yourself and in any situation where you need confidence.
You don’t need to be confident every second of every day. You only
need to be confident in situations where you need to be confident and
these situations don’t happen all the time.

3. At this point I think it’s important to mention what confidence isn’t.
The people you see on the BBC show “the Apprentice” and anyone
who is overly loud and in your face ARE NOT confident – they’re just
arrogant and cocky. These people have to over compensate
because of their lack of confidence. They tend to put people down
in front of others to make themselves seem better. I’d also like to
point out that you don’t need to be good looking, rich or famous to
be confident, anyone can be confident.
Some of the most famous actors, comedians and singers are very
different in their personal life compared to their public life. Freddy
Mercury (you know, lead singer from Queen) was an out and out
showman on stage, he took over Live Aid and blew away all the other
acts (he was even immortalised in the closing ceremony of the London
2012 Olympics and he’s been dead a few years now). Yet in his private
life he was completely different - shy, introverted and spoke with a slight
stutter.
Perhaps, having read this you’ll think differently about what confidence is
and may even realise that you’re actually more confident than you think
you are. In part 2 I’ll share with you 3 tips to boost your confidence.

4. _________________________________________________________
If you have any issues regarding confidence that you’d like me to help
you with, then please contact me for a free initial phone consultation.
You can do so in complete confidence and I can work with you on a 1 to
1 basis or come along to one of my workshops
John Blair – Confidence & Stress Management Coach
To find out more about John Blair, see his profile here:
http://www.yesyoucanchange.co.uk/about-me/profile