Leadership Skills for Women - Study Notes

Leadership Skills for Women
Study Notes
+W Series - Business Skills For Women1
http://SlideShare.net/OxfordCambridge
1 Men are allowed to read too, if they wish, as the language style and the document format are universal.

Study Notes http://SlideShare.net/OxfordCambridge
2 | P a g e L e a d e r s h i p S k i l l s f o r W o m e n
Table of Contents
About “+W Series - Management Skills For Women” .............................................................................................................................................3
1. Learning to Play by the Rules ..........................................................................................................................................................4
2. How Mentors and Advocates Can Enhance One’s Career .....................................................................................................4
3. A Mentor Can Help Your Career......................................................................................................................................................6
4. Choosing the Right Mentor...............................................................................................................................................................6
5. Analyzing Potential Mentors ...........................................................................................................................................................8
6. Building Strong Mentoring Relationships ..................................................................................................................................8
7. Building Your Network.................................................................................................................................................................... 10
8. Who Should Be Part of Your Professional Network?........................................................................................................... 11
9. Measures for Building a Network ............................................................................................................................................... 12
10. Using Your Network to Discover Corporate Culture ...................................................................................................... 14
11. Be an Advocate for Your Own Career................................................................................................................................... 15
12. Finding Opportunity in Rapid Growth ................................................................................................................................. 18
13. Communicate More Effectively............................................................................................................................................... 19
14. Take Smart Risks.......................................................................................................................................................................... 21
15. Behave Like a Leader.................................................................................................................................................................. 22
16. Focus on Your Skills..................................................................................................................................................................... 24
17. Understanding the Advantages of Being a Woman........................................................................................................ 26
18. Using Gender Diversity to Improve Business..................................................................................................................... 27
19. Maintaining Control Over Your Job....................................................................................................................................... 28
20. Keeping Your Life in Balance................................................................................................................................................... 29
21. Lean on Your Support System When Required................................................................................................................. 31
22. Avoiding Burn Out ....................................................................................................................................................................... 32
23. Reasons Why Men Understand Business Rules................................................................................................................. 33
24. Ways to Identify Unwritten Rules.......................................................................................................................................... 34
25. Tracking Unwritten Rules......................................................................................................................................................... 36
26. Benefits of Displaying Confidence.......................................................................................................................................... 36
27. Techniques to Advance Your Career..................................................................................................................................... 37
28. Strategies to Be Assertive.......................................................................................................................................................... 37
29. Control Your Emotions in Business Situations.................................................................................................................. 38
30. Build Support as a Leader......................................................................................................................................................... 39
31. Bending the Rules......................................................................................................................................................................... 39
32. Exerting Your Influence............................................................................................................................................................. 40
33. Global Factors that Enable Women to Lead...................................................................................................................... 41
34. Cultural Changes that Enable Women to Lead ................................................................................................................ 42
35. Creating Your Advancement Plan ......................................................................................................................................... 42
36. Exhibiting Self-confidence as a Female Leader................................................................................................................ 44
37. Creating a Shared Vision........................................................................................................................................................... 45
38. Role of Diversity in Advertising Changes ............................................................................................................................ 47
39. Persuade a Company to Make a Marketing Shift ............................................................................................................ 48
40. Become a Diversity Advocate .................................................................................................................................................. 49
41. Qualities of Leadership for Women in Daily Activities .................................................................................................. 50
42. Styles of Leadership..................................................................................................................................................................... 51
43. Cultivating Essential Leadership Qualities ........................................................................................................................ 52
44. Determining Your Leadership Potential ............................................................................................................................. 53
45. Avoiding Self-defeating Behaviour........................................................................................................................................ 54
46. Basic Rules of Communication for Women Leaders....................................................................................................... 55
47. Conquering Your Fears as a Leader...................................................................................................................................... 56
48. Learning to Assert Yourself...................................................................................................................................................... 59
49. Process for Neutralizing Conflict ........................................................................................................................................... 60
50. Creating a Supportive Environment..................................................................................................................................... 61
51. Elements of Effective Delegation............................................................................................................................................ 62
52. Increasing Your Success in Negotiations ............................................................................................................................ 64
53. Glossary............................................................................................................................................................................................ 66

About “+W Series - Management Skills For Women”
Study Notes in the fields of management and technology will be put together under this category for the following
reasons:
 to encourage ladies, who wish to do so, to stand up and look over the fence into management related
topics;
 with no apprehension or fear;
 and perhaps consider embracing a career move into a technological management path;
 or simply as to broaden their general knowledge;
 no matter the decision, their skills, professional strengths, and contribution can only be something
positive for management and technological fields.
Enjoy!

1. Learning to Play by the Rules
Business leaders have a better chance of winning if they know the rules of the game. But
figuring out the rules can be challenging at best. Fortunately, there are two simple rules that
can help you to discover unwritten company rules so you can play to win.
Rule 1: Observe how the game is played.
The first step of learning the game of business is to observe how the game is played. As a
leader, you're expected to give meaningful input, so jumping in too soon could damage your
credibility.
It's important for you to recognize what matters within your own organization. A key to
discovering what matters is observing the rules.
To learn the dynamics at work, ask about the past and observe how decisions are made and
who participates.
Rule 2: Emulate others as you play the game.
A leader's success lies in her ability to implement what she has learned. For example, your
company president often spends one Saturday a month socializing with big clients, and the
clients expect such invitations. You heard about this unwritten rule during a casual
conversation with a colleague. That colleague also has lunch or dinner with clients regularly.
Now that you know, it is important to emulate the unwritten rule and plan some personal time
for your clients.
You probably won't risk your job by not following you company's unwritten rules, but you will
build more respect as a leader among your clients, colleagues, and president if you do.
However, using proven strategies doesn't mean you set your own ideas aside. You need to find
a balance between your own creativity and what the organization is willing to accept.
Organizations rely on the abilities of their leaders to thrive. And once leaders discover and
emulate the rules that drive their organizations, they can use their abilities appropriately to
fulfill that expectation.
As a new executive, you would be wise to be conservative as you figure out your role. It's best
not to trample long-standing unwritten rules until you earn authority within the company.
When you earn a new leadership position, you're best bet is to observe the game and emulate
others as you play the game.
2. How Mentors and Advocates Can Enhance One’s Career
Good mentors and advocates can help a woman put her career on the fast track to leadership.
Mentors and advocates can help a woman learn a company's organizational culture, benefit
from outside observations of her performance, and gain visibility in her profession.

The terms "mentor" and "advocate" describe roles more than specific people. One person can
be a mentor at one point and an advocate at another. Mentors teach you the ropes of a business
either formally or informally. They are often considered guides who've been involved in your
business longer than you. Advocates also know your business better than you do. They are
people who champion your professional abilities. They might stand up for you in the face of
adversity or recommend you for an assignment or promotion.
 They can help you learn a company's organizational culture.
Mentors and advocates serve as cheerleaders for professionals with the desire to get
ahead in business. One way they can help a woman who strives to be a leader is by
teaching her the organizational culture. Organizational culture describes the subtle,
often unwritten, rules of the politics within a business. Mentors and advocates
understand those rules. They can teach you how internal systems function so you can
direct your efforts more effectively.
Learning the organizational culture from your mentors and advocates won't give you all
the answers, but it can give you just what you need to put you one step ahead of your
competition.
 They provide outside observations of your performance.
Women who want to be strong business leaders can benefit from having outside
observations of their performance. Because mentors and advocates are on your side,
they want you to succeed. That gives them incentive to offer constructive criticism of
what you've done. Their honest feedback about your strengths and weaknesses will give
you a chance to step back from your work and think about ways to do an even better
job.
If you're looking to make a strong impression with a client, for example, have your
mentor look over your work before you show it to your boss. Her input can help you see
what you've done from a fresh perspective and what you can do to refine your work.
 They can help you gain visibility in your profession.
The final way mentors and advocates can help women become strong leaders is to help
them gain visibility. An advocate with authority can influence how other leaders view
your abilities. And this may bring opportunities.
Company executives have different expectations of employees who want to reach
powerful positions. Mentors and advocates can tell you what work habits, credentials,
and dedication decision makers expect from the people who become executives.
Sometimes it is difficult to know which corporate leaders you should make aware of
your accomplishments. Mentors and advocates are great sources to ask about whom
you need to impress to be considered a serious candidate for promotions.
Because mentors and advocates are probably closer to decision makers than you are,
they often have insight into promotion opportunities. With their help, you can find out
more about the opportunities and whether you've got what it takes to fill the positions.

Mentors and advocates are professional allies as you try to reach your destination as a business
leader. They can provide insight into your company and into your work by helping you to learn
the organization's culture, critiquing your work, and helping you to gain the visibility.
3. A Mentor Can Help Your Career
What would you expect from someone who agreed to become your mentor in your
professional life? Mentors can do numerous things to help you advance in business. A mentor
can be a role model, a motivator, and an advocate.
The mentor as a role model
The first important part a mentor can play is role model. A strong mentor exhibits behavior
you want to emulate as a professional. The right person has strong abilities, implements good
ideas, and takes risks successfully. By observing your mentor and following her lead, you know
that you'll perform tasks appropriately.
The mentor as a motivator
A mentor can be just the person to offer you that outside perspective. Observing your
performance and goals is how he would serve another role: the motivator. Once your mentor
looks at what you are doing to reach your professional goals, he can point out your strengths
and encourage you to try new approaches. And the most important part of being a motivator is
to keep you positive. He's the person to turn to for advice as well as the one who convinces you
that you need to keep trying when work becomes challenging.
The mentor as an advocate
Finally, a mentor can be your advocate. A mentor has close contact with you and understands
your abilities and interests. She can become your advocate by letting others know about your
skills. She might help you by pitching your plan and giving you credit for its creation. Plus, she
has the contacts that enable her to introduce you to others who can assist in advancing your
career.
A mentor won't guarantee your success. She can't get you out of every jam or solve every
problem. At the same time, you're not a servant to your mentor. It's important for both of you
to keep the relationship respectful.
A mentor can be a valuable resource in moving your career forward. As a role model,
motivator, and advocate, the right mentor can help you to become an effective leader.
4. Choosing the Right Mentor
A mentoring relationship offers numerous benefits to the new executive. A mentor can act as a
role model, a motivator, and an advocate in your career. But for a mentor to be effective in
these roles, they must have the right qualifications.

Establishing a mentoring relationship is more than asking someone for help. You need to
choose a person who can become an asset in advancing your career. The following guidelines
will help you to select exactly the right mentor for your particular needs.
 Choose someone you want to emulate.
The first guideline in choosing appropriate mentors is to select people whose abilities
you admire and want to emulate. This step will ensure a mentoring relationship that is
productive and founded on respect.
 Don't limit your choices.
Don't limit your mentors to women or to high-level managers or even to people within
your own company. It is important to consider men as potential mentors. If you limit
yourself to women because you think they understand your point of view, you'll miss
out on many opportunities to grow. It's also important to remember that people outside
your industry can offer great insight. They have a fresh perspective on your career and
can expand your understanding of the business world.
Successful mentoring relationships are only possible when you pick people who have
the skills and experience to teach you exactly what you want to know. Learn all you can
about every candidate to be sure you're making a good choice.
 Be ready to choose more than one mentor.
Finally, it is unrealistic to think that one person can teach you all you need to know
about your profession. When you stop learning new things from your mentor or when
you discover your mentor doesn't have all the skills you want to learn, it's time to move
on.
The ultimate goal of a mentoring relationship is to improve the abilities of the protege.
The need to move away from the relationship is really a sign of success.
Mentoring relationships will only be helpful if you choose the right people as mentors. By
following these guidelines, you will be able to select people who can broaden your professional
experience and improve your chances for advancing in your career.

5. Analyzing Potential Mentors
This is a guide to analyze candidates you're considering as potential mentors.
Your Needs Details (Describe each skill or the
knowledge you want to learn from a
specific mentor.)
Are You
Still
Learning?
Learning
Completed?
Skill 1
Skill 2
Skill 3
Knowledge
Candidate's Name Describe your mentoring candidate's potential to
help you.
Skills
Knowledge
Power
Availability
Willingness to help and
history of helping others
6. Building Strong Mentoring Relationships
The most productive professional relationships are based on mutual respect. A mentoring
relationship is no exception. For a mentoring relationship to be productive, you need to choose
someone you respect and whose skills you want to emulate. Your mentor, in turn, must respect

you and support your desire to excel in your profession. But how do you gain this respect from
your mentor?
To gain respect and build strong mentoring relationships you must act responsibly to establish
trust, and you must reciprocate in the relationship.
Act responsibly to establish trust.
Acting responsibly is one behavior you can practice to help build trust in mentoring
relationships. Think about how important it is to trust the people who work with you. Then
consider the trust you have in friends. When mentors feel the same type of trust toward you,
your relationships can grow. Mentors gain trust in you when you act responsibly in applying
the advice they offer, perform well at work, meet your obligations, and maintain
confidentiality.
Your need for advice is the main reason you have asked mentors to help you. You will gain
their trust when you apply the suggestions they have given you.
Your mentors want to know you're doing your job well. When you perform tasks as they
expect, you earn their trust in you as a professional. It's important that you put forth effort to
achieve success if you expect mentors to continue working with you.
Any strong relationship needs the participants to carry through on their obligations. If you say
you will make a call for your mentor, then do it. Or when you promise to finish something on
time, be sure to make the deadline. Meeting your obligations will build trust.
At times you may become a sounding board for mentors. They may tell you about stress they
feel on the job. It's up to you to maintain confidentiality. You expect mentors to respect your
privacy. You need to offer the same respect to earn your mentors' trust.
Reciprocate in the relationship.
The other behavior you should exhibit as a protege is reciprocating in your mentoring
relationships. You can't expect relationships to be centered only on your professional growth;
your mentors deserve consideration too.
One-sided relationships usually don't last very long. Your mentors want to know they're doing
something positive for you and that you are reciprocating in some way. Satisfaction in helping
someone grow is the reason many people become mentors. It can validate their years of
experience and boost their egos.
In addition to showing your appreciation verbally, you should be ready to assist your mentor
with the job at hand. Don't expect your mentor to do everything for you or she will quickly lose
interest.
If you want to benefit from the help mentors can offer, you must build strong relationships. You
need to work hard at meeting your mentors' expectations and you must let them know how
much you appreciate their efforts. Acting responsibly to establish trust and reciprocating in the
relationship provide a solid foundation for building strong, productive mentoring
relationships.

7. Building Your Network
Nearly every day at work, you meet someone who can become a solid member of your
professional network. You don't even have to look far; most of them are right in front of you.
Members of your network can include those:
 within your peer group
 beyond your peer group
 across the gender gap.
Your peers are the most obvious part of your network. Often these become your most relaxed
professional relationships. You have the same authority and often share the same experiences.
It's not difficult to relate to one another, and these positive relationships often help your
business run smoothly.
Other people in your network will be beyond your peer group. Sometimes trying to connect
with people beyond your peer group takes you out of your comfort zone, but it's necessary to
build a strong network. Although peers offer an understanding of your views, branching out
will expand your understanding of your business. Those outside your peer group include
executives, subordinates, and professionals who don't work in your office.
Executives - It's impossible to move high up the corporate ladder without connecting with top
executives. If you're in touch with corporate leaders, they have a chance to learn of your
abilities.
Subordinates - Networking with people who work under your authority proves to them that
you want to earn their respect. If people who answer to you know you honestly care about
them, they're likely to be more productive. Keep in mind that you never know when you might
end up working for them.
Professionals outside of your organization - Sometimes relationships that start with loose
professional connections turn out to be quite valuable. Experts in other fields may provide
information you need one day or an outsider's opinion of your business. You can also
experience personal satisfaction if you're able to help them.
One crucial move you should make as you network is to cross the gender gap. It's easier for
most women to connect with other women, but that's not a realistic way to build a network.
For example, Rita became the first female executive in her corporation. She avoided socializing
much with her male colleagues until she realized she wasn't learning the culture very quickly.
Once she included men in her network, she enriched her professional life and enhanced her
success as a leader.
Remember, many high-powered men have been in the business world longer than you have.
They have valuable knowledge and can teach you things that would take years to learn on your
own. Not including them in your network would be foolish.

You should remember that your network needs to be diverse if you want to keep growing
professionally. Among the few you wouldn't include: people with questionable integrity or
those you don't work with successfully.
Most women who have reached the top offices continue to build their networks. They
understand that successful networking will bring them closer to experts in many areas who
will help them continue to develop their careers. If you include people within your peer group,
beyond your peer group, and across the gender gap, you'll likely find that you know someone
with the right advice on just about anything.
8. Who Should Be Part of Your Professional Network?
Building a professional network is an important aspect of becoming a strong leader. A
professional network can help you to acquire knowledge and develop new skills, particularly
when you know who should be part of your network.
Because your time is limited, you need to focus your efforts on developing relationships with
people who will have a positive impact on your career. This includes: leaders in powerful
positions, colleagues, and professionals outside of your organization.
People in positions of power
The first group to include in your professional network are people in powerful positions. If you
want to become a leader, you need to get to know the people who lead now. You need to make
contact with the people who run your department, office, and corporation. These connections
will increase you visibility to the people in power. They will also help you become more
comfortable around powerful people.
Colleagues
Your colleagues are another crucial group to include in your professional network. These are
the people who can relate to what you go through every day on the job. They offer
understanding and support and help you achieve the tasks that must be done in your business.
Colleagues include peers, subordinates, and people in other departments. Peers having the
same amount of power as you can offer support. They understand the pressures of your
responsibilities. Peers also have experience getting things done in your company, which they
can share with you.
Subordinates are the people who report to you are important to your network. They
accomplish the tasks for which you carry the ultimate responsibility. They can tell you what's
happening on the front line and help you improve processes. Working closely with
subordinates lets you gain their cooperation.
You can't be a leader if you don't understand all aspects of your business. For this reason, you
will also want to include in your network people from other departments. These contacts will
encourage better coordination within your organization. They will also help win the respect
you will need when you do become a leader.

Being open to networking with everyone in your company will help you build a strong
understanding of what it takes to be successful. You will see the operating procedures in
various departments as well as the efforts of the people who work on the front lines.
Professionals outside of your organization
In addition to getting to know the people inside your company, you need to cultivate
professional relationships with people on the outside.
The most crucial people to network with outside of your company are those in your industry.
It's a great way to learn about new techniques in business and what competitors may be
considering. You also should network with key people in businesses closely connected to your
own, such as those who handle the finances or supply equipment to your company. Your
organization's success depends on these members of your network.
The people you interact with every day are potential members of your network. Your decision
to cultivate a professional relationship should be based on your understanding of how they can
help you lead your company to achieve even greater successes. As you build your network,
remember to include people in powerful positions, colleagues, and others outside of your
organization.
9. Measures for Building a Network
Author, John Mason, once wrote: "Don't wait for your ship to come in; swim out to meet it."
Mason's book by the same title was written to inspire people to follow their dreams, a concept
that applies well to business. You may experience luck at times, but you can't depend on it. If
you want success, you have to create success.
A good way to pursue success in your career is to be proactive about building a professional
network. Being proactive means seizing network-building opportunities by: conversing with
people in power, being accessible to people at all levels of your network, and seeking input
from those in your network.
Conversing with people in power
You can't create a strong network without including people in high-powered positions. Sincere
conversations with leaders will help you gain access to the level you hope to reach in your
career. The contact also helps you build support among people who make the big decisions.
Conversing with people in power takes practice. Don't be intimidated by executives. Most
corporate officers want to be connected to the staff. All it takes is bona fide reasons to build
communication.
Being accessible to people at all levels of your network
The second strategy is being accessible to people at all levels of your network. You already
know that you need contact with powerful people. But you also must connect with those equal
to and below you in the corporate hierarchy.

Be considerate of everyone in your network. Peers will learn that they can count on your skills
when working with you. And those who report to you will know they can expect your support.
Seeking input from those in your network
Remember that members of your network are resources. If you need help solving a problem,
call on contacts who may have a solution. If a process fails, ask for a colleague's ideas on
changing it. When your company's image slides downward, speak to a CEO who has been
through a similar crisis. Ask people with experience what solutions have worked in the past
and what things you should avoid.
However, don't abuse your connections. It is unacceptable to call people only when you need
their help. Build genuine, respectful relationships, and offer your assistance when you think
you can help others.
Each time you speak to people in power, make yourself available to others, and ask people for
help, you strengthen your professional network. You also gain better visibility among
executives and colleagues in your network will be more willing to help you accomplish quality
results and support you as you gain more responsibility.
Work to maintain connections with people in your network all the time, not just in times of
need. When you make the effort to strengthen relationships with those in your network, you
are being proactive in advancing your career.
Below, decide whether you're building and using your professional network appropriately.
Your goal is to answer positively as many of the questions as possible.

Building a Network Yes No
Do I make connections with people in power?
Do I make connections with people with the same authority I have?
Do I make connections with people with less authority than I have?
Do I make connections with people in other departments of my company?
Do I make connections with people outside of my organization?
Do I contact people I've recently met after I say I will?
Do I find good reasons to contact people I want to meet?
Do I make a sincere effort to build relationships with people?
Using a Network Yes No
Do I call people in my network when I need something?
Do I make sure I call people in my network at times other than when I need
something?
Do I contact people in my network when I think I can help them?
Do I make time for people at all levels of my network?
Do I listen to the opinions of people in my network?
Do I use the advice of people in my network?
10. Using Your Network to Discover Corporate Culture
Understanding your organization's corporate culture is essential if you want to advance in your
career. One resource for learning about company culture is your professional network. The
people in your network can provide important information about company values, goals and
expectations when you know what questions to ask.
You can advance your career by asking the people in your network: who has power within the
company, what expectations you need to meet, and how to advance your career.
Who has power within the organization?
The first thing you need to know about the corporate culture is who has the power. Obviously,
corporate presidents and vice presidents play major roles in operations, but you need to know
who really makes things happen. Who listens to ideas? Who is interested in ways to improve
daily operations? Who gets things done? Who is responsible for implementing changes? Who

makes decisions about daily operations? The answers to these questions will tell you who in
the organization has the power to help you reach your goals.
What expectations do you need to meet?
Your network also can help you discover what expectations you need to meet within the
corporate culture. You may already know your written responsibilities but you will also want
to discover any unwritten responsibilities. When you ask questions to find out all of your
responsibilities, both written and unwritten, you can devise a plan to meet or surpass
expectations.
How can you advance in your career?
The final reason to find out about the corporate culture is to learn how to advance in business.
Seek details about those who lead in your company, how they reached the top, and how you
can prove you would fit the executive mold.
Find out who should know about your accomplishments and how they want to hear about
them. Then be sure your accomplishments and skills are visible to these people. Get to know
your managers, executives, and the CEO. Your knowledge of what it takes to excel and your
visibility to company decision makers will help you advance in your career.
Leaders who quickly adjust to new companies usually work hard to discover what makes each
organization's culture unique. They build a network of people who can answer their questions.
When you know what questions to ask, you can discover who has power within the company,
what expectations you need to meet, and how to advance your career.
11. Be an Advocate for Your Own Career
When was the last time you did or said something that boosted your career? If you want to
become a solid business leader, you need to do more than dream about reaching the top.
Sometimes you will find lucky breaks, but most of the time, you will have to create your own
luck. The best way to do that is to become the most active player in your career—to become
your own advocate.
To become your own advocate, you have to create a career statement, interact regularly with
high-powered people, and realize you can't always be liked.
Create a career statement.
Creating a career statement is the first step in becoming your own advocate. A succinct
sentence or phrase about what you want to accomplish or how you want to be perceived will
help you focus your daily activities.
Take out a piece of paper, and write a phrase or sentence that sums up the legacy you'd like to
leave with your company. This is your career statement, and it can ultimately guide you
through all the things you want to achieve.
Once you put your professional purpose into a concise statement, it will be easier to focus all
your goals on reaching it. The exercise will help you establish a career plan that outlines your

goals and keeps them focused. Specifically, it will help you to set short- and long-term goals,
and avoid distractions.
Short-term goals - A clear objective of your career allows you to decide which short-term goals
matter. For example, your statement might be to recruit and retain major clients. Completing
research for a client might be your short-term goal. The task may help you hang on to that
important client.
Long-term goals - You'll use long-term goals to view the big picture. For example, your career
statement might be to find and work with the best talent in the business. So you might track
your hiring practices carefully. You will see what works well and urge managers to continue
those practices to reduce staff turnover rates.
Distractions - Knowing what you want to achieve will help keep you on track. Imagine your
statement is to keep business efficient. If there is sometimes little to report at your weekly all-
staff meetings, stop the practice, and call meetings only when needed. This would be more
efficient.
Interact regularly with high-powered people.
You should also interact regularly with high-powered people. Speaking with executives might
seem intimidating, but the contact gives you a better chance of becoming a member of the
decision-making team. Find reasons to hold legitimate conversations with company leaders.
Small talk is fine, but more relevant contact will get you noticed and won't feel like a waste of
time. And the more often you speak to powerful people, the easier it gets. Practice the strategy
by:
 making small talk, but not every time you speak with executives
 discussing genuine day-to-day business concerns
 talking about something you read about your business
 asking questions about the company.
How many times have you been face to face with the CEO of your company only to find you
have no idea what to say? If you interact regularly with powerful people, that feeling will be
drastically reduced. The more you are around people in charge, the more comfortable you will
become working with them.
Realize you can't always be liked.
The final strategy, realizing you can't always be liked, will help you learn to be a strong leader.
If you make decisions based on the goal of being a friend to everyone, your decisions won't be
effective. It's important to learn that your actions matter to the business, not to your social life.
Women fall into a "like me" trap more often than male leaders, because women have a strong
urge to be accepted. Men do too, but men seem more skilled at separating business from
personal relationships. Many have been raised to view business as a game and to think that it
isn't about their personalities. Women need to practice that skill too.
Imagine yourself heading a department. You've done well in getting people on your staff to
work toward the same goal. You've even heard that workers in other departments have asked

to be transferred because of your reputation as a great boss. Now think about what you would
do if you discovered that people were abusing their lunch hours. Imagine you spoke to a few
people directly, but the problem continued and became widespread. Then you started
enforcing the one-hour lunch rule. People wouldn't be pleased, but it would be necessary.
These kinds of decisions may not make you popular with your department. However, if they
are the best decisions for the business, they must be made. And it's your job as a leader to make
them.
When you become your own advocate, you become the driving force on the road to
advancement. You can become an influential leader in your company by practicing these
strategies and learning to use them effectively.
It takes practice to get used to the strategies that will put you in command of your professional
destiny. However, the effort will be worthwhile because you will build the focus and confidence
that you need to become a strong force in your business.
Below, create your personal career plan. Create a career statement: one sentence or phrase
that sums up what you want from your career. Make sure the items in the chart focus on
making your statement a reality. Use additional sheets if you need more room to document
your goals or plans.

Short-term Goals (note
details)
Target Date Process (what it will take to
reach the goal)
Date Reached
Goal 1
Goal 2
Long-term Goals Target Date Process Date Reached
Goal 1
Goal 2
Becoming Visible (Write
down a task you took on
or an idea you
originated.)
Date Result Experience
Acquired
Distractions (Write
down a task you should
stop doing or can
delegate.)
Date
Stopped
Result Experience
Acquired
12. Finding Opportunity in Rapid Growth
When companies grow quickly, they often have difficulty hiring enough people to meet their
needs. Fortunately, these rapid changes mean more opportunities for women because:
 job openings outnumber qualified candidates

 women make up a larger percentage of today's work force
 companies are more flexible about how their employees work.
The first change in business that benefits women is rapid growth. When organizations grow
rapidly, they need to hire capable people quickly, regardless of gender.
The second change that brings more business opportunities for women is that women now
make up a larger percentage of the work force. In the past, female applicants competed mainly
with men. Today, they compete with nearly as many women as men.
Women make up about half of the work force today. As the pool of qualified job candidates
shrinks in relation to the number of openings, and as the ratio of female-to-male candidates
evens out, women are finding better opportunities.
Third, women can benefit from companies that are becoming more flexible about how their
employees work. Technology has expanded business over larger geographical areas, which
often requires employees to keep nontraditional hours. And corporations are finding value in
giving staff members options in how they achieve their responsibilities. Telecommuting,
flextime, and job sharing are three examples.
Telecommuting - Organizations with the right technology can hire people to work from many
locations, including their homes. Files can be sent by fax or e-mail. Teleconferences and the
Internet can keep people connected. Women and men alike can avoid travel or even moving if
they can telecommute.
Flextime - Many women now juggle multiple work and family responsibilities by setting their
own schedules with flextime. Technology often allows people to accomplish work at any time
of day, which can be a benefit when doing business across time zones.
Job sharing - Job sharing gives flexibility to those with family obligations. Employees can share
duties and split company benefits. They avoid the rigors of full-time employment, but can still
produce quality work. Organizations that offer job sharing exhibit a respect for family life and a
desire to keep loyal employees.
Women who are leaders may have less flexibility, because business often demands their
presence. However, flexible work environments have become more commonplace, and leaders
usually have control over their own schedules.
Consider the changes in your organization or industry. Can you take advantage of them?
Changes in business can benefit women because: job openings outnumber qualified candidates,
women make up a larger percentage of today's work force, and companies are more flexible
about how people work.
13. Communicate More Effectively
Michelle oversees development for a company that builds ergonomic equipment for office
supply stores. She pitches ideas to executives to convince them to fund new product lines. It's

common to hear Michelle giving detailed explanations of what doesn't work well in offices and
how her latest line of equipment will change everything. Michelle knows exactly what she
needs to do to communicate effectively in her business. It doesn't mean she's perfect and
always wins her funding, but leaders such as Michelle succeed more often than they fail.
In general, leaders who communicate effectively have learned how to express ideas, use body
language, and talk about accomplishments.
 Express ideas.
You can't become a successful leader if you don't know how to communicate exactly
what you want to do and how you intend to do it. Think about the people who command
attention at meetings. Good leaders state exactly what they think will help their
businesses. They make their points quickly and succinctly, and they are not afraid to
tactfully disagree. It's rare to see a good leader sitting quietly if she disagrees with a
point or thinks she can improve upon someone else's idea.
Powerful leaders have no trouble speaking up when it matters the most. It's rare to see
them squirming even if they aren't sure about something. And they let people know
when they've reached a well-planned goal.
 Use body language.
You can't take a leader seriously if he doesn't look you in the eye when he speaks. The
same is true of someone who appears nervous or distracted. The way a leader comes
across physically as he speaks is just as important as the actual message he's sending.
Women often struggle to keep eye contact. But if you use it, it can express that you
believe what you're saying. Averting your eyes can indicate submission to the listener or
insecurity about what you're saying.
Standing straight exhibits authority—but not if the body appears stiff. A confident
leader should appear commanding but relaxed in her stance. Avoid slouching because it
can suggest a lack of interest.
Leaders should avoid touching their faces or crossing their arms. These gestures
indicate the speaker is insecure or has something to hide. Gestures should emphasize
points, not compensate for nervousness.
 Talk about accomplishments.
It's not bragging to describe your accomplishments. Those who didn't work with you
directly on a project can't guess how you contributed to its success. Letting others know
about your success simply creates the positive impression you're seeking.
Leaders should also exhibit confidence when discussing the successes they've had.
Perhaps they've come up with great ideas or led major projects to reach difficult goals. A
leader must make sure others know of her capabilities and accomplishments.
What you say, how you say it, and who knows about it matter a great deal in the world of
business. To succeed in a powerful position, you need to learn to communicate effectively by

expressing your ideas clearly, being aware of your body language, and talking about your
accomplishments.
14. Take Smart Risks
Have you ever considered taking a gamble in your professional life and then decided it wasn't
worth the price you might have to pay if you failed? To improve your career, you should learn
to take smart risks by not giving in to your fears, moving beyond your comfort zone, and
knowing which risks are smart ones.
Learning not to give in to your fears
Successful female leaders explain that they overcome fear by ignoring their doubts and simply
doing their jobs to their best ability. They also say they become better at facing fears by
tackling them. To take on your own fears and build confidence, you should:
Improve what you see as your shortcomings. - Many women don't have enough faith in their
abilities and only focus on what they can't do. If you believe you're lacking in skills, find a way
to improve. You haven't reached your current level of success without learning something, so
know that you're always capable of learning more.
Think of the worst thing that can happen. - Another thing that might cause you to fear taking
risks is imagining the worst thing that can happen. So do it. Consider what will truly result if
you fail at the task at hand. Will you lose your job, or will you just have to start your work over?
Answering such questions can help you put the risk in perspective.
Learn from your mistakes. - Most leaders can tell you stories of their greatest failures. They're
what taught them to do things better the next time. People spend a lot more time analyzing
what went wrong than what went right. If you look closely at your mistakes, you're not as
likely to repeat them.
The thought of completely failing while taking a chance is enough to scare anyone, but you
must get over that fear. Not giving in to those fears is the first way women can learn to take
smart risks in business.
Moving beyond your comfort zone
Often when women feel fearful as leaders, it is because they're being pushed off the routine
path. Moving beyond that comfort zone is the second way to take smart risks in business.
Getting too comfortable in a job can stop your climb to the top. It's not enough to just wish for a
chance to do something meaningful. You must take opportunities to stretch yourself further
than you have before.
Jot down some things you might try in your job that would put you outside your comfort zone
and choose to do the things that will help you gain new skills.
Knowing which risks are smart
The final step in taking smart risks is knowing which risks are "smart." To help you decide,
you'll want to do a little research.

First, do some homework to discover the possibility of success if you take the risk. Decide what
you already know how to do and figure out what things you can learn. Then take on the
challenge. Second, you must be confident with what you'd like to try. If you know that you can
do a good job in a more responsible position, apply for it and convince your company you can
do it.
If you've had success in your professional life so far, why wouldn't you be the right person to
tackle the difficult new task or be considered for an open management position?
Deciding to risk doing something that might go wrong is not an easy step to take. Once you
decide to take it, however, you'll never regret having the courage to try. You can begin to take
smart risks by not giving in to fears, moving beyond the comfort zone, and knowing what risks
are smart.
Below, determine whether you're taking on tough tasks in your career.
Challenge Date
Achieved
I asked to take on a challenging client, account, or job duty that will help me
meet my career goals.
I volunteered for a task I've never done before.
I said to a supervisor, "Give me a chance to prove myself."
I asked to perform a task that isn't part of my routine responsibilities.
I asked for additional training.
I requested an opportunity to hone a new skill.
15. Behave Like a Leader
Irwin Federman once said, "Your job gives you authority. Your behavior gives you respect."
What Federman was getting at is that being appointed the head of your department or
company isn't enough to make you an effective leader. You must also exhibit behavior that
earns you the respect of those you lead.
To gain respect, female leaders must avoid self-defeating language, meet expectations, and
delegate appropriately.
 Avoid self-defeating language.
To be an effective leader, you must avoid self-defeating language. Don't apologize before
making a point or downplay or qualify your ideas.

It's easy to apologize if you think your views will displease someone. But don't do it.
Apologizing for your ideas only undermines your power. Instead of saying, "I'm sorry,
but I disagree," simply say, "I disagree," and keep talking.
Avoid qualifying phrases such as "I know you've heard this, but..." and "I don't know if
this will work, but..." And don't seek confirmation all the time by asking "Don't you
think?" or "OK?"
Another habit some women have is using a doubting pitch when speaking. If you
complete a sentence and it sounds like a question, you are introducing doubt into the
conversation. A questioning pitch gives your listener the impression that you don't even
believe what you're saying.
You should also avoid hesitating speech which conveys insecurity. If you have
something unpleasant to say, just say it. Skirting around the issue is painful for you and
your listener.
Avoiding self-defeating language doesn't mean that you should be rude or brash as a
leader. Just make sure that when you speak, you make it clear that you deserve to be
heard.
 Meet expectations.
Another behavior women in leadership should exhibit is meeting expectations.
Employees and employers want to know they can count on you to make decisions, set
and enforce the rules, and provide guidance.
Corporations and employees expect many things from their leaders. One is to make
quick decisions. Sometimes that means you can't do as much research as you'd like or
take as much time to think about things as you'd like. In your position, you must also
maintain your authority. Those who report to you expect you to set limits. As the leader,
you must enforce the rules and be fair when you have to discipline employees. Finally,
employees expect guidance. You need to be available to assist people as needed so they
can do their jobs. People will look to you for answers every day. You'll make mistakes
along the way, but your goal is to do the best you can and consistently meet their
expectations.
 Delegate appropriately.
Delegating appropriately is the final skill that will help you behave like a leader. Some
women who move into leadership are perfectionists, and they wrongly believe they
must do everything themselves. Don't get caught up in perfectionism. You are
responsible for the work that comes from your department or company, but you have to
let your employees fulfill their duties.
You can't do it all. - Most people, especially leaders, can always think of one more task
they should do before they go home. Because you probably have more work than one
person can realistically accomplish, get some help. You never know: The tasks you hate
may be tasks someone else actually enjoys.

You have priorities. - It's easy to get buried in mounds of paperwork or calls to confirm
appointments. You need to prioritize and decide what tasks are most important for you
to finish. Ask yourself whether you're really the only person who can do a job. If not,
give it to someone else.
It's their job. - One of your biggest priorities as a leader is to improve the skills of those
who report to you. That doesn't mean doing their jobs for them. You need to give
guidance to employees so they can succeed in their jobs, but remember to back off and
let them work.
You'll get more done once you learn how to delegate effectively. If you find it difficult,
start with small tasks and give a lot of directions. With practice, it will get easier, and
you will be amazed how much more work you will get done.
Remember, just because you hold the title of someone in authority doesn't mean people will
automatically give you the respect you deserve. It is crucial that you reinforce your leadership
every day. You can do that through what you say, how you act, and what you accomplish.
16. Focus on Your Skills
Focusing on personal strengths is a strategy successful leaders use to develop their own style
of leadership. To put this strategy to work for you, you must take a look at your abilities, your
relationships, and your instincts.
 your abilities
Recognizing your abilities is the first step toward using them effectively to advance in
your career. Knowing which skills are your strongest will enable you to put yourself in
positions in which you can use them. If you know you have a knack for convincing
reluctant employees to work a little harder, use that skill whenever you can.
 relationships
The second technique to help you focus your skills is to focus on relationships. As a
leader, develop sincere professional relationships. Get to know reports, colleagues, and
supervisors as individuals. Also learn their professional abilities. Most people will notice
genuine concern for good relationships, and they will return the respect.
Because you are a leader, you should also encourage others to build good relationships.
Be objective about the conflicts among your staff. Offer advice and encouragement to
employees to maintain professional attitudes.
 instinct
The final technique to help you focus on your skills is to trust your instincts. Some
researchers believe instincts are based on personal experiences. Others believe instinct
is the ability to pick up on nuances. Regardless, give yourself permission to listen. Track
the times you have trusted your gut reaction and see how often you are right. Then go
with your instincts when you see a strong reason to do so.

Your methods of leadership may be different from others' because you are drawing from your
own skills, relationships, and experiences. Expect to be different from others, and do what feels
natural to you as a leader.
The ultimate goal of every leader is to make the business work. You can focus your skills on
achieving this goal by recognizing the best use of your abilities, focusing on relationships, and
trusting your instincts.
Below, to assess your abilities and willingness to alter things you'd like to change or improve.
Rate your abilities from 1-5 with 5 being the highest. Then rate whether you feel you need to or
are willing to change each ability.
Abilities 1 2 3 4 5
1. I build communication and relationships with people at all levels.
My willingness and ability to change or improve
2. I face and resolve conflict.
3. I motivate others.
4. I learn neccessary facts quickly and adequately.
5. I keep up with advances and news in my industry.
6. I produce at levels expected from myself and those above me.
7. I reach beyond my current skill levels.
8. I prioritize and delegate tasks.
9. I prepare for presentations, meetings, and tasks.
10. I pursue interests not related to my career.

17. Understanding the Advantages of Being a Woman
Women in business have long fought the stereotypes established in our society. But is it wise
for women to dismiss all the traits that originally defined them? More female leaders are
refusing to simply mimic successful men and have given themselves permission to use their
feminine strengths.
Many women know that being female can itself be an advantage in business. The reasons?
Women dominate the marketplace, are often raised with different values, and take different
approaches to business.
The first reason women have an advantage in business is that they dominate the marketplace.
As a group, women now buy, or contribute to buying, a majority of the goods and services sold.
Over the past ten years, advertisers have turned their focus to female consumers. Consider the
following statements from women consumers:
"I've taken charge of shopping for my family's clothes. It's something I don't mind doing. I'm the
one who knows how to find the most efficient and economic places to get the job done."
"I've always paid the bills. I just prefer handling the finances."
"I've even become more active in buying stocks and choosing mutual funds, through my company
plans and on my own."
"Whenever we need a new car, I'm the one who researches what models we should test-drive.
Then we both come to an agreement on the one we like best. I'm also more likely to take our cars
in for maintenance and major repairs."
"When it comes to vitamins and medicine, I'm more knowledgeable about the choices. I'm careful
about reading labels. And I'm the first one in my family to look for another doctor when I'm not
happy with the service we're getting."
Being raised with different values than men is also an advantage for women in business. Some
traditions that parents teach their daughters can create obstacles in the business world. But
some aspects of those lessons can be channeled in positive ways, such as:
 learning to consider the feelings of others
 not interrupting people
 not bragging.
Being taught to "act like a lady" doesn't mean you can't be assertive and it actually gives you an
advantage where tact and diplomacy are essential. Learning to respect the feelings of others
and making a habit of not interrupting people are skills which enable you to listening carefully
in business situations. Being taught not to brag can inspire you to share the credit for successes
with others—remembering, of course, to take some of the credit yourself.
A third reason women may have advantages over men is that women take different approaches
to business. For example, many female leaders prefer to build sincere relationships with
business associates. Or they use more of their life experiences at work. Men tend to separate

their personal and professional lives which means they may miss an opportunity to apply
something they've learned at home in an appropriate business situation.
Women can use life experiences to draw their audiences in at work. This doesn't mean women
achieve success because they use stereotypical behavior, such as being more nurturing or not
being as ambitious as men. It does, however, give women permission to use business
approaches that better fit their perspectives.
Women must realize that they can enrich their careers by embracing all aspects of who they
are. In fact, women can have an advantage over men in business because they: dominate the
marketplace, are often raised with different values, take different approaches to business.
18. Using Gender Diversity to Improve Business
In the past, women emulated male leaders to achieve success in business. But times have
changed. Today, women are learning to take advantage of gender diversity by:
 expressing unique and innovative ideas
 inviting dialogue about diversity
 moving beyond stereotypes.
The first strategy women can use to succeed in business is to express their unique and
innovative ideas. Women can offer fresh perspectives based on their multi-faceted roles in
society. Your perspective as a women can help your company stay on the cutting edge.
Inviting dialogue about the diversity between men and women in the workplace is the second
strategy you can use to take advantage of that diversity. Instead of ignoring gender differences,
encourage people to talk about them from their perspectives. Consider the following example
of a gender-based dialogue:
"I've noticed that we never show women in the ads for our house paint. Don't you think we're
ignoring potential customers with that approach?"
"I hadn't thought about it like that. I guess we haven't really considered women as a separate
group of customers. Let's talk to our ad agency about changing that."
Once you begin to invite dialogue, you can work on the last strategy: moving beyond
stereotypes. Society has reinforced many images of what women value and how they should
behave. You may not fit society's mold of a "typical" woman. Few women do. So when co-
workers generalize about female behaviors, try to widen their perspectives. Explain how you
see things from your experience. You also can point out that some ideas that may seem
feminine actually appeal to a much wider audience.
Of course, you don't want to focus solely on being female, but instead use the strategies to be
true to yourself. Don't completely dismiss traditions or try to come across as superior to men.
Just become confident in providing your input to improve business.

The more open you are about gender diversity within your company, the more comfortable
you will become in contributing to the business. You will learn to believe in your ideas and you
will be in a better position to help co-workers move past stereotypes.
Once you understand these basic strategies, you need to know how to put them to work. Find
ways to express unique ideas that will help your business improve.
Open up the discussion. - Don't shy away from the discussion when co-workers charge that an
idea is too "feminine." Be open about using your perspective as a woman. Then invite a
discussion about the issue.
Emphasize the positive. - Describe how looking at something from a different perspective can
improve business. Point out the benefits you believe stem from your point of view.
Ask for others' opinions. - Instead of waiting for objections or challenges to your ideas, ask
others what they think, so you can get the issue on the table.
Finally, women need to help their co-workers move beyond long-standing stereotypes. You
don't have to live with the misperceptions others have about women. In fact, you can help
prove those expected behaviors are wrong. Point out when people use stereotypes. Then
explain how the stereotypes aren't appropriate or accurate. Ultimately, you need to be true to
yourself and trust that you can use your female perspective to improve business.
19. Maintaining Control Over Your Job
You wouldn't want your boss to tell you how to spend your time away from work so why
would you let your job take all of your time and energy? While you might be tempted to devote
all of your time to your profession, you need to set limits that enable you to maintain a healthy
balance at work and at home.
Job demands can be overwhelming, so it is important to stay in control by communicating your
limitations, listing your priorities, setting goals, and celebrating your achievements.
 Communicate your limitations.
You have to be realistic about what you can accomplish in the time you are given. If you
find that your job responsibilities are greater than the time it takes to achieve them,
communicate your limits. When you communicate your limits, you maintain control
over your responsibilities and avoid delays and failure.
 List your priorities.
Once you have set limits you need to decide which duties need immediate attention and
which ones can wait. Prioritize your tasks according to the task's ability to improve
business or damage it if ignored. Shelve tasks that consume time but offer little benefit.
If you fail to finish a task on time, will it cost you your job? Will your company lose
money or a client? Will a positive outcome bring profit or prestige? Are other people
waiting for you to finish before they can continue working? What is your deadline? Is
the deadline arbitrary or absolute?

Figure out the amount of time a task will require as you decide its priority. Is the end
result worth that much time? Will the work take you away from other tasks that have a
greater impact on business? Decide which tasks are worth your precious time.
As you evaluate each task, remember that priorities can and frequently do change. Be
flexible and plan to re-evaluate your priorities at regular intervals.
 Set goals.
Once you know which duties are essential, you need to decide how to achieve them.
Setting goals will help you to stay focused while performing critical tasks. To set goals,
you need to evaluate the situation, imagine the outcome, assign tasks, and establish
milestones.
Evaluate the situation. - You already understand that some action must be taken to
handle the priority. Stop and evaluate the big picture. What is really happening that
needs to change? Once you figure that out, you will have a clearer picture of where you
want to go.
Imagine the outcome. - Imagine what outcome you would like to see once you have
completed a task. When you can envision the positive result, let that image become your
focus in reaching your goal.
Assign tasks. - After examining the big picture and the preferred outcome, assign the
tasks necessary to accomplish the goal. Carefully consider what duties will help achieve
the goal and which might be a waste of time.
Establish milestones. - To help you and your team evaluate progress as you work
toward the goal, establish milestones. Knowing you have made progress encourages you
and your team to keep going. Reflecting on the milestones also reminds you exactly
what the goal is and how far you have come.
 Celebrate your achievements.
When you and your team succeed—celebrate. Offer extra time off, bonuses, or gift
certificates to show your appreciation. And remember to report achievements to people
in power. Acknowledging victories gives everyone a chance to appreciate what was
accomplished and to be appreciated for their individual contributions.
These strategies are not designed to help you avoid challenging work. Instead, they are meant
to help you be more realistic about your career. By communicating your limitations, listing
your priorities, setting goals, and celebrating when you reach those goals, you can avoid
becoming overwhelmed and succeed in reaching your goals.
20. Keeping Your Life in Balance
Successful women in leadership maintain strong dedication to their professions, but most
realize that life is not all about work. Women who find success in business have also learned to
find life balance by:

 separating work and home
You can't survive long at the top without taking care of your own needs. You do need to
work hard, but you have to make time for family, friends, and for yourself.
Separating your work and home life is the first way to find balance. Sometimes you must
take work home, but avoid the practice as much as possible. Set boundaries that force
you to step away.
 using your resources
Few people climb to the top on their own. A good balance also comes from using your
resources. Family members, friends, home service people, and partners can provide the
support you need to focus on your career.
Consider your partner your greatest resource, someone who wants you to succeed
because both of you will win. Share your struggles, and make time for the relationship
to keep it emotionally sound.
Planning is another helpful resource. If you know a new promotion will keep you away
from home, plan to hire someone to take care of your bills. Give yourself permission to
find help with necessary tasks, especially those you dislike.
 taking care of yourself
The last way to ensure you have balance in your life is to take care of yourself. It's
impossible to stay healthy if you don't think about what's best for you. Make time for
fun activities, eat well, exercise, and be sure to get enough sleep.
Look closely at a high-powered person who appears happy in her life. Chances are, she's found
ways to balance her professional and personal lives. That balance can be yours if you learn to
separate work and home, use your resources, and take care of yourself.
Separate Work and Home Life
 Be realistic. You can't focus on all of your priorities at once. Sometimes work will
come first, sometimes your personal life will.
 Do everything you can to not take work home with you. If you do work at home,
establish a no-work zone.
 Consider or suggest alternative work schedules such as flextime, telecommuting,
and job-sharing, if it's reasonable in your career.
 Establish your home responsibilities if you have a partner and/or children. Decide
who does which chores.
 Hire someone to help with the tasks at home, such as paying the bills, grocery
shopping, and housecleaning. It will allow you to enjoy time at home.
 Talk to people at work who also balance their professional and personal lives.
 Strive for a strong social life. Give yourself permission to get away and even show
up late if you have responsibilities at work.
 Take time to ask yourself if you're happy.

21. Lean on Your Support System When Required
Have you ever faced a personal crisis or had to cope with a tragedy that completely interfered
with your work? When you face personal struggles, it can become difficult or even impossible
to concentrate on your job. On these occasions, you need to lean on others for support.
To handle crises, you need to build your support system, know when you need help, and accept
help.
Build your support system.
The first strategy for coping with crises is to build your support system. You can do this by
looking for opportunities to help others. If you make time to help others, they will typically
come through when you are the one who needs help. If you find yourself needing time away
from work to care for a sick or injured family member, you may discover your biggest
supporter is your supervisor or a colleague who you have helped in the past.
Know when you need help.
Once you have a support system, you must master the next strategy: know when you need
help. When you have built a successful career, it's easy to believe you can do everything on
your own. But that kind of thinking during a crisis can cause trouble. Don't take chances with
your career. Don't wait until your life and workload are out of control before asking for help.
Accept help.
The final strategy in handling crises is being able to accept help. Don't try to be a superhero
when you are weighed down with a crisis. Consider the times you have extended a hand to
others. Chances are you didn't think twice about lending your assistance, so let others do the
same for you.
Everyone needs to lean on others at some point. When you need help, don't try to go it alone.
Instead, plan for support by building your support system, recognizing when you need help,
and asking for the help without feeling guilty.
Below, determine whether your goals are in alignment with your priorities.

Priorities (List your
personal and professional
priorities.)
Goals and Tasks (List the goals
you've set to deal with the
priorities in your life and the tasks
that will help you achieve them.)
Do They Align?
22. Avoiding Burn Out
Can you remember a project in your career that kept you from getting a good night's sleep? If
you're like most professionals, you can. And when the difficult time ended, you probably vowed
never to let your personal life become so overshadowed by work again. But work stress has a
way of recurring. You probably can't avoid the cycle, but you can use behaviors to help you
leave work issues at work.
Learning to balance responsibilities and making plans for time away from work can help you
avoid burning out on the job. In this way, you can focus on each aspect of living at the
appropriate time.

Balancing your responsibilities.
Sometimes your career will demand extra concentration and effort. At other times, you will
need to put your energy into family or friends. It's up to you to decide what is important so you
can fulfill all of your obligations.
Do you feel pulled in another direction while you try to concentrate on something? If you do,
your work and home life may be unbalanced. To find out what you can do to achieve balance,
ask yourself these questions: Do I avoid taking work home when I can? Do I shift my priorities
when necessary?
If your job requires you to put in extra hours at certain times during the year, plan for those
periods. Adjust your schedule during peak task periods so you can focus on your professional
responsibilities without feeling pressured. Plan to work overtime or to take work home and
adjust your home life accordingly. But don't always put in overtime or work from home. You
need time away from work to attend to your family, friends, health and house.
Schedule time away from work.
Schedule time for outside interests and for the activities you enjoy. Make time for family and
friends. Then, be sure to leave work in time to follow through on your outside plans.
Be organized. Schedule leisure time on you calendar and take that time seriously. When you
have something planned, arrange to leave the office on time or a few minutes early to avoid the
evening rush hour.
Successful leaders understand the importance of balancing job and personal responsibilities.
They know spending too much time at work will result in friction at home and may even injure
their health. At the same time, effective leaders are realistic about the demands they face at
work. Learning to balance responsibilities and scheduling time away from work are the keys
effective leaders use to burning out on the job and damaging personal relationships.
23. Reasons Why Men Understand Business Rules
In spite of the many advances being made in the business world today, women who lead face
more challenges than men. It takes keen observation to discern all the various protocols, but
knowing them helps women compete in the business arena and earn more respect within the
company. By identifying and understanding the rules of an organization, you will fit in with
other leaders and find your own voice. Men have an inherent ability to understand business
rules. This instinctive behavior is due to their:
1. Upbringing
Regardless of the efforts of many parents to raise gender-sensitive children, some
traditions prevail. These traditions encourage boys to:
Be tough - This encourages boys to be strong despite adverse situations. They learn not
to cry or whine about losing or not getting their own way. This strength of spirit allows
successful businessmen to maintain their composure when dealing with their
adversaries.

Be persistent - This teaches boys to pursue issues they feel strongly about. It also gives
them an early lesson on the importance of working towards a goal with patience and
dedication. All effective business leaders are persistent.
Work it out - Encouraging boys to work out problems with their peers teaches them to
debate when they disagree. They learn to focus on the logic during the discussion. The
ability to dialogue is a vital business skill.
Play to win - Boys are willing to do what it takes to win, including going after their
opponents weaknesses. This mindset is often transferred into other aspects of their
adult lives. This thinking helps men to focus on achieving their goals with determination
and confidence.
2. Creation of the rules
Although businesses are changing, and more women hold powerful positions, men still
operate most of the top companies. They also founded many of the organizations and
the rules that exist today. This makes it much easier to grasp the rules.
3. Respect for rules.
Men have an inherent respect for rules. They often debate the meaning of the rules,
bend them to suit their needs, or find ways to justify breaking them. However, they
want guidelines on which to base their decisions.
Whether you are a man or woman, it is important for you to understand why your co-workers
do what they do. Men and women do not have to adopt the same business practices to succeed.
When familiarizing yourself with how men view business, you will understand the origins of
business rules and requirements. By learning the rules of your organization, you will become
an effective employee and leader. Your peers will respect your abilities and accept your
opinions.
24. Ways to Identify Unwritten Rules
Every organization will have different expectations both written and unwritten. To be an
effective leader, you need to have a firm grasp on the unwritten rules of your company. Some
rules will become apparent quickly, but most take effort to learn and understand. To identify
and apply these rules, you need to:
 Identify the impact of the unwritten rules on the business.
Review the rules' significance to the company. It is possible that an informal or
unwritten rule could hurt the success of the company. It is important to evaluate each
informal rule, to be clear on how closely it should be followed.
 Observe successful colleagues practicing unwritten rules.
Watch the individuals in authority. These people set the example when following
unwritten rules. Investigate whether all the powerful people within the organization
comply with the same invisible rules. This observation will reveal the pattern of
behaviors expected from all leaders.
 Ask others to explain unwritten rules.
It is impossible to clarify expectations without speaking to the people who are already

familiar with the rules. This is sometimes the easiest and quickest way to acquaint
yourself with the company's expectations.
Joining a company, especially as a new leader, requires the ability to learn the organizational
culture quickly. One way to do that is by dealing effectively with the unwritten rules. By
following all the policies, both written and unwritten, you can efficiently lead others and
increase the chances of your success within the organization.

25. Tracking Unwritten Rules
Keep track of the unwritten rules within your organization.
Unwritten Rule
List the
unwritten rule
you've learned.
Importance to Your Organization
Describe the positive impact the
unwritten rule will have on your
business.
Importance to Your Career
Describe the positive impact the
unwritten rule will have on
advancing your career.
1.
2.
3.
4.
26. Benefits of Displaying Confidence
Successful leaders not only have strong skills, but they also have confidence in their abilities.
The display of confidence when mixed with solid skills will help you become a successful
business leader. By portraying confidence as a leader, you will be:
 viewed as a leader
Show others that you are willing to make difficult decisions and attempt new ideas. If
you are uncertain about your approach, you should exhibit courage and try to keep your
doubts to yourself.
 accepted as valuable to the team
You need to show confidence when you describe your expectations, assign tasks, and
take risks. If you appear to know what you want to accomplish, your team will be willing

to cooperate. They will appreciate your self-assurance and strive to reach the goals you
have set.
 respected in your position
Try new and creative ideas. Listen to the suggestions of your fellow employees. If
something goes wrong with a plan, accept your share of the blame. Set up a meeting to
discuss the failure and avoid the same mistakes in the future. By being confident and
proactive, you will become respected in your leadership position.
Leaders cannot succeed by confidence alone. They must also have strong skills. The
combination of skills and self-confidence will enable you to achieve a leadership position. By
acting with confidence, you will build a solid reputation of success.
27. Techniques to Advance Your Career
Career growth and development depends on how you approach your daily tasks and
responsibilities. To increase your chances for advancement, you need to become a valuable
asset to your organization. To expand your skills and abilities, you need to:
 Do more than follow directions.
When a supervisor gives you clear directions on what he wants done, it is easy to
complete the assignment exactly as requested. However, if you show that you are
willing to go beyond the basic task, you will improve your standing within the company.
By doing more than simply following directions, you exhibit a willingness to work hard.
 Perform routine tasks in new ways.
Professionals can tire of fulfilling regular duties, but those who perform routine tasks in
new and creative ways add meaning to the duties. Consider ways to speed up routines
such as recruiting people to help you or scheduling specific times to accomplish tasks.
When you complete your duties efficiently and use creativity to make them more
interesting and valuable, you will save time and gain visibility within your company.
 Work outside of your comfort zone.
To be a success in your career, you need to improve your job skills constantly. Push
yourself to do more than just perform the duties you have already mastered. Try new
ideas. Ask for more responsibility any time you can handle it along with your present
tasks. Do not let the fear of failing stop you from working outside of your comfort zone.
If you do not take risks, you cannot grow in your career. By seeking challenging
opportunities, you will exhibit your willingness to work hard, try new ideas, and
develop your skills.
Advancing your career takes more than simply following rules and directions. You must extend
yourself and seek opportunities to learn and improve your skills and abilities. By applying
these techniques, you show your desire to become a valued employee and your commitment to
the success of the organization.
28. Strategies to Be Assertive
To become an effective leader and advance your career, you must be assertive. Being assertive
does not mean being unreasonable, unscrupulous or rude. It simply means that you are

confident about your skills and abilities to tackle new challenges. To be an assertive leader in
business situations, you need to:
 Volunteer for tough tasks.
Do not wait for opportunity to knock at your door. Seek out difficult tasks and ask for
the assignment. Do not be shy. Show enthusiasm. Most companies provide plenty of
busywork to occupy your time. However, staying busy with routine responsibilities will
not help you be noticed as a leader. The real opportunities for growth are demanding
duties that display your skills and abilities. By extending yourself beyond the
boundaries of your current position, you will gain respect as a business leader and
increase your professional knowledge.
 Fight for what you want.
It is not necessary to be rude, pushy or unethical to fight for what you want. You should
simply state your case in a confident manner.
 Play to win.
Use your strengths and experiences to persuade others of your abilities. List your
strengths. Explain why you are the best choice. Do not be shy about describing the
experience, skills, and personal qualities that make you uniquely qualified for the
opportunity. Explain the advantages you have over your competitors. There may be
times when you need to point out your competitors' disadvantages. You should focus on
presenting the facts and avoid resorting to personal attacks. If the tide seems to be
turning against you, do not give up. Continue to assert your position as long as it makes
sense to do so. Stay positive and upbeat. Emphasize your desire to help the company
succeed.
The effective use of these strategies requires integrity and tact. There is a fine line between
being perceived as confident and assertive or pushy and arrogant. You must use common sense
to avoid straying over that line. By being an assertive leader, you will gain confidence, gain
respect as a leader, and expand your skills.
29. Control Your Emotions in Business Situations
Although people occasionally express emotions in business settings, it is important not to allow
your personal feelings to interfere with your ability to conduct business. To control your
emotions in business situations, you should:
 not take the criticism personally
Do not regard professional criticism or disagreements as personal attacks. Most
business disputes are based on differences of opinion, not on whether those involved
like each other. Businesspeople often speak harshly about the actions of others on the
job, but true professionals do not attack one another on a personal level. Stay focused
on the issue at hand and do not become distracted by your feelings.
 view mistakes as learning experiences
A business failure does not have to end your career. In fact, failures often help you grow
professionally. Careful analysis of what went wrong teaches you what to do differently
in the future.
 move on
It is important to realize that the frustrations you are experiencing now relate to the

business issue at hand. When the issue is resolved, you must put those frustrations
behind you so you can move on to the next item.
Since passionate opinions can lead to frustration and criticism, professionals need to manage
their emotions carefully. By regulating your feelings, you will remain objective, gain the respect
of your co-workers and managers, and become an effective leader.
30. Build Support as a Leader
Changes in business rules are not a unilateral activity. It involves negotiation with other people
in business, who learn to trust your integrity and respect your business sense. These
interactions and negotiations help you build your reputation as a leader. To build support for
you as a leader, you need to:
 Reveal your successes.
Discussing your successes does not mean that you brag about what you have
accomplished or embellish minor achievements. When you reveal your successes, you
are simply taking credit for what you have achieved and how it improved business,
either from your past or in your current job.
 Make sincere connections with peers and subordinates.
Sincere communication enables your subordinates and colleagues to view you as a
caring person. Ask them about their career goals, families, interests, and favorite
pastimes. This connection helps you build a healthy rapport with them. By encouraging
positive relationships, you increase the chances that your fellow employees will accept
the changes you suggest.
 Win your supervisor's respect.
If you work toward the same goal as your supervisor and earn his respect, you will
make changes more quickly. Your boss will have more respect for your leadership skills
if you come to him when you need guidance or advice. Your goal is to demonstrate to
your supervisor that you know when to seek help. You do not want to give the
impression that you are helpless.
Exhibiting your ability to lead will enable you to influence rule changes in your organization.
Unless the people around you trust and respect your capabilities, you will be unable to make
any positive alterations. By building support as a leader, you will demonstrate that you have
the wisdom and courage to know when it is time to change existing rules.
31. Bending the Rules
Sometimes in business you have to bend the rules to succeed. This does not mean you ignore
the rules. It simply means that you use them as a foundation for your business practices,
without allowing them to bind you. To accomplish this, you need to:
 Do something that has never been done before.
Employ your own creativity and make the regulations work for you. These ideas often
spark innovation and help employees see an issue from a different perspective.

 Do something outside your job description.
When you perform a duty or function that is outside your job description, you are going
above and beyond your duties. This type of action inspires your coworkers, improves
employee morale, gives you a fresh viewpoint, and demonstrates your dedication to the
organization.
 Put a new spin on an old idea.
Seek solutions from the employees who work with the problem processes. This will help
you identify and resolve areas that affect the productivity of your company.
Bending the rules involves a certain amount of risk. There is no guarantee of success. However,
sometimes you will need to take risks to succeed. By bending rules, you will approach issues
with a fresh perspective, make your employees feel valued, and ensure the continued success
of your organization.
Would you solve problems in your organization by bending the rules of business in a positive
way? Please, check what follow next.
Briefly describe the problem.
What traditional approaches would your organization typically use to solve this problem?
Describe an innovative solution, an idea that's never been tried before, or a new twist on a
traditional approach.
List written or unwritten rules that stand in the way of the innovative solution.
Can you justify bending those rules for this solution? Explain your rationale.
What tasks outside your current job description will you volunteer to perform in order to
contribute to the success of the innovative solution?
32. Exerting Your Influence
Successful female leaders have altered the business world. Becoming a prominent leader
requires courage and wisdom to persuade others. By learning how to exercise your influence,
you will affect your organization. To exert your influence, you must:

Leadership Skills for Women - Study Notes

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