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Verbal Defense & Influence
DFPS Basic Instructor Class
     Jan 7 – 11, 2013
In Memorial
VDI _Family Protective_Services
Acknowledgements

• Dr. George Thompson   President
• Mike Manley           Vice President
• Lee Fjelstad          Vice President
• Gary T. Klugiewicz    PoliceOne / Vistelar
  Group
• Tony Pinelle          VDI Master Trainer
• Peter Harrell Jr.     VDI Master Trainer
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Klugiewicz Background

•   Martial Artist
•   Milwaukee County Sheriff’s Office
•   DAAT / POSC Program Developer
•   Calibre Press Street Survival Instructor
•   H&K / Team One Network
•   Verbal Judo / Verbal Defense & Influence
•   PoliceOne / CorrectionsOne
Harrell Background

• Senior Consultant Verbal Judo/Verbal Defense
  & Influence
• Organization and Development Specialist
• Keynote Speaker
• Actor
• Father
VDI Class Formats
Verbal Judo Exposure

•   Heard the term
•   Attended a conference presentation
•   Limited exposure in other classes
•   Attended a short orientation session
•   Took a one or two day class
•   Attended an Instructor class
•   Consider yourself an VJ Operator
Verbal Judo

Verbal Judo is a well established method of
providing people with Tactical Communication
skills.
Any situation has the potential for getting out of
hand. Knowing how to “redirect a person’s
behavior with words” is a person’s most
important communication tool for keeping
everyone safe.
Welcome
• Registration
• Welcome / Overview – Table Top Materials /
  Name Tags
• Build Binder / Manual Orientation
• Participant Expectation Guidelines
• Training Safety Rules
• Videotaping Orientation / Instructor
  Introduction
• Attendee Background / Duties / Expectations
• Assignments - Reading
• Performance Testing Choices
• Certificates
Instructor Roles &
         Responsibilities
• Registration
• Welcome / Overview – Table Top Materials /
  Name Tags
• Build Binder / Manual Orientation
• Participant Expectation Guidelines
• Training Safety Rules
• Videotaping Orientation / Instructor
  Introduction
• Attendee Background / Duties / Expectations
• Assignments - Reading
• Performance Testing Choices
• Certificates
Student Expectation
          Guidelines
• Minimum of 90% Attendance with Make
  Up
• Open Mind / Positive Attitude
• Compliance with Training Safety Rules
• Contact Instructor if Late / Absent
• Successful Completion of Practical
  Exercises
• At least 80% on All Written Tests
• Complete and Turn In Final Evaluations
Student Expectation
          Guidelines



• When we listen with the intent to teach,
  we learn at a deeper level.
• When we teach, we gain new insight
  and our learning expands,
                                   Stephen Covey
Classroom
        Management
• Instructor One Voice – Stop
  Immediately
• Instructor Raised Hand – Finish your
  sentence but not the paragraph
• Student “STOP” Notification Statement
  –Use whenever you don’t understand
  what is being said by the instructor
• Use of electronic equipment
How the Class will be
           Taught

1.   Demonstration
2.   Explanation
3.   Repetition
4.   Simulation
Changing Educational
     Paradigm
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How People Learn
Retaining Knowledge

1.   Hearing
2.   Seeing
3.   Doing
4.   Experiencing
5.   Teaching
                    Karen Spencer, PhD.
                    Purposeful Teaching
Student Expectation
          Guidelines



• When we listen with the intent to teach,
  we learn at a deeper level.
• When we teach, we gain new insight
  and our learning expands,
                                   Stephen Covey
Learning Pyramid %
1.   5% Lecture
2.   10% Reading
3.   20% Audiovisual
4.   30% Demonstration
5.   50% Group Discussion
6.   75% Learning by Doing
7.   90% Teaching Others

       Adapted from David Sousa, How the Brain Learns
       by Cynthia Furse, University of Utah
Goals of the Course

• PERSONAL SAFETY
• Enhanced Professionalism
• Decreased Citizen Complaints
• Decreased Vicarious Liability
• Lessen Stress
• Court Power & Articulation
• Increased Staff Morale
Program Format

• Self – Assessment

• Professionalism

• Communication Theory

• Tactics
Part One
Self - Assessment
Self - Assessment

   Who are you?
Principles/Attributes
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Five Universal Truths

1. All people want to be treated with dignity
   and respect.
2. All people want to be asked rather than
   being told to do something.
3. All people want to be told why they are
   being asked to do something.
4. All people want to be to be given options
   rather than threats.
5. All people want a second chance.
Five Universal Truths




           1


               DFPS Staff treat others:




5              1. ALWAYS TREAT OTHERS with dignity and
                     respect.
               2. ASK THEM, don’t tell them to do something.
               3. TELL THEM WHY they should do it.
               4. GIVE OPTIONS, not threats.
               5. GIVE THEM a second chance, if appropriate.
Five
                                                                 Universal
                                                                   Truths
     Regardless of differences, all people want;
1)   To be treated with dignity & respect.
2)   To be asked rather than told to do something.
3)   To be told why they’re being asked to do something.
4)   To be given options rather than threats.
5)   To be given a 2nd chance.
                                      © Verbal Defense & Influence with
 Adapted from ‘5 Universal Truths of Verbal Judo’ by Dr. Thompson of the Verbal Judo Institute. ©2008 Verbal Judo®
                                         the Verbal Judo Institute, Inc.                                           39
© Verbal Defense & Influence with
  the Verbal Judo Institute, Inc.   40
ACTIVITY

Pick a partner and teach 5 UT Then discuss how it
may improve the agency, and your life.
Part Two
Good Decision Making?


• Why do you make such good decisions?

• Experience

• How do you get experience?

• Bad Decisions
Traits of a Professional


•   High Visibility
•   Quick Decisions
•   Codified Body of Knowledge
•   Continuous Training
•   Adapt to Change
•   Ethical Standard of Conduct
•   Licensed; Badge A Symbol Of
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Universal Greeting’s Purpose
Tactical 8 Step Concept
Universal Greeting
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Universal Greeting Script
8.1 Good Morning,
8.2 I’m Gary Klugiewicz, a consultant with Verbal Defense &
   Influence.
8.3 The reason I am here this morning is to introduce my
   partner Peter Harrell Jr. who is
      He is currently a senior consultant for Verbal Defense & Influence
      He is an actor with 40 years experience
      Retired state employee
      Father/Spouse

8.6 One of Peter’s expectations for the class is to have the
   participants perform Tactical Communication Tactics with
   people they interact with at work, their clients, as well as
   their family, friends, and others.
Universal Greeting (a.)

                    • Morning Coffee
•   8.1. Good Morning, _____________
•   (Use customer service representatives name, if
    known)
•   8.2. My name is ________________. I am a
    guest in Room 204.
•   8.3. The reason that I am contacting you is that
    its 4AM and wanted to get a cup a coffee. I
    noticed that there is no coffee machine in the
    room.
•   8.4. Is there somewhere in the hotel where I can
    get a cup of coffee?
Universal Greeting (b.)

             • Information Gathering
• I am … (Title / Name) from the … (List your
  agency).
• I am here to attend this Verbal Defense &
  Influence Course. I have been asked to interview
  you.
• May I ask you name, title, current assignment,
  any personal information that you would like to
  disclose, and one of your expectations for the
  class?
Universal Greeting (c.)

           • Partner Introduction to Class
•   Good Morning…
•   I am … (Title / Name) from the … (List your
    agency).
•   The reason I am here this morning is to
    introduce … Introduce your partner with
    name, rank, agency, position with other
    background and personal information as noted.
•   Explain one of your partner’s expectations for
    the class
ACTIVITY
Using one of the introduction scripts,
introduce your partner to group.
The Goal of
  Professional Intervention
            is to
Generate Voluntary Compliance,
Cooperation   and   Collaboration
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Overcoming A Natural
Adversarial Relationship




            Our Job
  To Meet & Greet and O.N.A.R.
  Overcome Natural Adversarial
         Relationship
Our Service To The
     Community




       We Think For Others
As They Might Think For Themselves
        48-72 Hours Later.
Professionalism Concept

       Learn to stop
        REACTING
         and start
      RESPONDING
 to the ongoing situation.
Tactical Cognitive
       Dissonance

TCD is a professional survival trait at
allows you to leave your Personal Value
System at home and utilize your
Professional Value System at work
creating an Alter Ego that will keep you
and others safe.
Maintaining Emotional
    Equilibrium


    NO       MIND

    Dis / interest

      Non    Bias
Maintaining Emotional
      Equilibrium

              MUSHIN is:
       Professional Detachment
            A Habit of Mind
One must remain Open , Flexible and
 Unbiased.
Maintaining Emotional
         Equilibrium

    What is your public professional face?
•   Affect
•   Calm, Still Center
•   Become an Chameleon
•   You are what you look like
•   You are what you sound like
Personal vs. Professional Face
ACTIVITY
Pick a different partner, and use a
professional face appropriate for work;
home.
Maintaining Emotional
       Equilibrium

  Chief Harry Dolan’s “Rule of 24”


• 24 hours
• 24 minutes
• 24 seconds
Maintaining Emotional
      Equilibrium




A term used to mentally give you a tactical
mind set for the task at hand. A reminder to
use your professional face and words that will
generate voluntary compliance, cooperation
and collaboration.
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VDI _Family Protective_Services
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ACTIVITY
Pick a different partner, and discuss what
methods you currently are using to keep
your “emotional equilibrium.” What are
some steps you could both use in the
future?
Know Your Weaknesses

                Name It:      “Mr. Better Than”

                Define It:       He Who . . .
Hot Buttons
    or                       Challenges My Authority
 Triggers


         The Path To Strength Is Built On
            Recognized Weaknesses.
ACTIVITY
Discuss with your partner two
“weaknesses” you are currently aware of.
Design a “trigger guard” for your
weaknesses.
How many people are usually
told about a negative contact?
It has been estimated that seventeen
  persons are told about an negative
  employee contact that is seen by
  only one person.

How may people are told about an
 event
witnessed by 100’s or 1000’s of
 spectators?
The Contact Professional

• In Contact With Self

• In Contact With The Organization

• In Contact With The Subject.
The Contact Professional

          Who Do You Represent?
1. Self

2.

3.

4.

5.
ACTIVITY
Pick a different partner, and discuss what
how you became a professional.
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S.A.F.E.R
S.A.F.E.R.
Ethical Intervention Concept
 ETHOS = “Self” Ethical intervention is "the
representative self acting to uphold the standard
of conduct expected by one's office.

  Whenever our 'personal self' acts in
  contradiction to our 'representative self' we
  need another to act for us as we would act under
  better conditions--hence "Ethical Intervention.”

  In other words, Ethical Intervention is an act that
  helps sustain our best Representational Power
  under stress. It is, then, THE act of the Art of
  Representation. Dr. George Thompson
Ethical Intervention Concept

        You are the representative

• Isn’t it true that at the point of contact, a
  single employee “represents” the whole
  organization for better… or worse?




• What kind of representative are you?
VDI _Family Protective_Services
Ethical Intervention Concept
Ethical Intervention Concept


      There are no longer any
 innocent professional bystanders.

• Assist your fellow staff members
• Fix something if it’s going wrong
• Stop something that’s wrong
• But no matter what, you need to write a
 report that explains what you observed.
Ethical Intervention Concept
Ethical Intervention Concept
Ethical Intervention Concept



1. Protection from a Sudden Assault
2. Protection from Poor Tactics: Staff
   Safety Violations
3. Protection from Policy Violations
4. Protection from Out of Control
   Behavior
Ethical Intervention Concept
Ethical Interventions
Verbal Intervention


•   Simply talk to your partner
•   “Showtime”
•   “Be Careful Partner”
•   “Knock It Off”
•   Investigator Tap Out
•   Call for Assistance
Chief Dolan’s “Knock It Off”

•   Previous generations of employees in the
    workplace simply did what they were asked to
    do with little debate. Many younger employees
    have been raised demanding to know “why”.
    So tell them “why” and see how quickly they
    come on board.
•   Most importantly, when their actions or
    comments are inconsistent with your
    organizations mission, tell them to “Knock It
    Off”.
Harry Dolan “Knock It Off
Golden Rule
Platinum Rule




       Treat others as
 you would like to be treated
under the same circumstances.
Cultivating the Art of Courtesy
Cultivating the Art of Courtesy
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Three Kinds of People


  There are 102
Cultures in the U.S.
     But Only
 Three Kinds of
      People
Three Kinds of People
Difficult People
ACTIVITY
Pick a different partner, and discuss what
how you have handled difficult people in
the past. At work? At home? In the
community?
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Part Three
Hart Peace Story
Communication Theory




The opposite of talking should be
LISTENING but for most people it
is WAITING TO INTERRUPT!
Be Alert & Decisive

• Remain Alert

• Be Decisive

• Have a preplanned, practiced response
  in mind
L.E.A.P.S. Concept

• You must be Unbiased, Flexible, and
  Open

• Hear Literally

• Interpret Accurately

• Act Appropriately
The Great Equalizer

If you don’t listen to what the person is
saying, watch what they are doing, and put
everything in “context” of the current
situation and the distance you are from the
person, you will never see the argument,
complaint and/or assault coming.
Listening Components

•   Words
•   Tone of Voice
•   Facial Expressions
•   Body Language
•   Context of the Situation
•   Distance / Positioning
L.E.A.P.S. Concept

Empathize
  • To See Through The Others Eyes
  • Construct A Verbal Means To Relate To
    The Subject
  • You Do Not Have To Agree… Simply
    Understand The Others Perspective.
L.E.A.P.S. Concept

  Tactical Empathy
L.E.A.P.S. Concept

        Listening & Empathizing
• Listening gives you intel on where the
  subject is today.
• Empathizing gives you intel on where the
  subject has been in the past.
• Combining knowing where the subject is
  today and has been in the past gives you
  the best predictor of where the subject is
  going to go in the near future.
ACTIVITY
Discuss with your group a time when you
could have used empathy but didn’t. What
was the result? How does one attain
empathy?
L.E.A.P.S. Concept

Ask
(Five Types of Questions)
  • Fact Finding
  • General
  • Direct
  • Leading
  • Opinion Seeking.
L.E.A.P.S. Concept
L.E.A.P.S. Concept
L.E.A.P.S. Concept
L.E.A.P.S. Concept
L.E.A.P.S. Concept

 “Sword of Interruption Technique”

Say … “Excuse me, let me see,
you seem to be (feeling/emotion)
_______________ because of
(content/reason)
________________.”
L.E.A.P.S. Concept
L.E.A.P.S. Concept
L.E.A.P.S. Concept

            • Anti – Peace Phrases
•   Calm Down!
•   What’s Your Problem?
•   You People…
•   Come Over Here!
•   I’m not going to tell you again…
•   Because these are the rules!
L.E.A.P.S. Concept

• Tactical Peace Phrases
ACTIVITY
Teach the concept of LEAPS to a group of three.
Each person will take a turn. Discuss with your
triad, which LEAPS concepts you are currently
using. Which ones do you need work on.
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Street Truth
Art of Mediation
Art of Mediation

People in crisis are often under the
influences of:
• Rage
• Anger
• FEAR
• Frustration
• The Unknown
• They are “trapped” in a box…We must
  open the box with options.
Art of Mediation
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The Art Of Translation
The Art Of Translation
Quicksand
Street Truth
“Self As Seen By Self”
Street Truth
Street Truth

          • Street Truth # 3



• 93% of your success is determined by
           your delivery style.
VDI _Family Protective_Services
Communication Theory




  93% = Delivery Style
Communication Theory

       Content

                 Credibility = Credo

                       Belief

                 Power & Influence

                      History
Communication Theory

                     VOICE



  • 33 – 40%
  • How you Say it


      If there is a contradiction between
“Content” and “Voice”, which should you believe?
Communication Theory

                       VOICE
   • Tone = Attitude

   • Pace = Speed

   • Pitch = High/Soft

   • Modulation = Ebb & Flow

The Voice is a window of a person’s intentions.
Communication Theory

     ROLE VS VOICE
Communication Theory
Communication Theory
Communication Theory
Communication Theory
Communication Theory
Communication Theory
Communication Theory
“Anger Management”
ACTIVITY
Form teams of 3-4 and debrief film. (1) Use
tactics learned to improve response. (2)
Demonstrate improved response to class.
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ACTIVITY
This section of the class will involve…
Part Five
Gary Fire Talk/Fire Drills
Proxemics



   (prok-se-miks) The study of the cultural,
behavioral, and sociological aspects of spatial
       distances between individuals.
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Proxemics
Proxemics
Proxemics


• Note: These tactics were develop by Gary T.
Klugiewicz with contributions from Tony Pinelle,
Joel Lashley, and Doug Lynch based on material
provided by Dr. George Thompson and numerous
nationally known defensive tactics and crisis
management instructors
•
•
• © 2012 Verbal Defense & Influence
Proxemics
Proxemics
Proxemics
Proxemics
Proxemics




         R.A.M.


Reasonable Arc of Movement
Proxemics
Tony “Thinker Stance”
Proxemics
Proxemics
Proxemics
Proxemics
“Sitting Tactically”
Proxemics
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VDI _Family Protective_Services
VDI _Family Protective_Services
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Part Six
VDI _Family Protective_Services
Tactics
Tactics
Tactics
ACTIVITY
Form teams of 3-4 and discuss “Anatomy
of a Verbal Assault”.
Tactics

Anatomy of a Verbal Assault
1. What are the reasons for verbal
   assaults?

2. How do you control your
   personal/professional face?

3. In the past, how have you handled
   verbal assaults? At work? At Home?
Tactics

    • Types of Verbal Assaults
•   Authority
•   Profanity
•   Personal Threats
•   Family Safety
•   Other Staff
Tactics

    • Types of Verbal Assaults
•   Physical Features
•   Age/Sex/Sexuality
•   Skill/Competence
•   Education
•   Economic Status
VDI _Family Protective_Services
Tactics
Tactics
Tactics


• Funny Word Blocks (Quick,
  Appropriate, no Counter Punch)
• Serious Word Blocks
• Polite Threat Word Blocks
• Mobilizing the Audience Word Blocks
• Sudden Assault (Time Out) Word
  Blocks
Tactics
Tactics

      Combination Deflectors
• I hear what you’re saying, and I got
  that, however…

• I hear that, and I’m listening, but…

• You seem upset, and I’m sorry you
  feel that way, however…
Tactics

               EXAMPLE
Comment:
“Why are you at my house again, I get tired
of ya’ll coming here. Don’t you have
anything better to do than bother us?”
Response:
“ I can see you are upset, I’m here again to
get some information we need to be able to
assist your family.”
ACTIVITY
Your team will create two real life
scenarios from your work experience and
use deflectors to handle verbal abuse.
VDI _Family Protective_Services
Tactics
Tactics
Tactics
Tactics



1.   Listen
2.   Empathize
3.   Ask
4.   Paraphrase
5.   Summarize
Tactics
Tactics
Tactics



•   Security
•   Attack
•   Flight
•   Excessive Repetition
•   Revised Priorities
Tactics
Tactics
Tactics

Universal Greeting
Tactics

Persuasion Sequence
Tactics
Tactics
Tactics
Tactics
VDI _Family Protective_Services
The Art Of Translation
Art of Mediation
Tactics
Five Universal Truths




           1


               DFPS Staff treat others:




5              1. ALWAYS TREAT OTHERS with dignity and
                     respect.
               2. ASK THEM, don’t tell them to do something.
               3. TELL THEM WHY they should do it.
               4. GIVE OPTIONS, not threats.
               5. GIVE THEM a second chance, if appropriate.
Tactics
Tactics
Tactics
Tactics
Tactics
Tactics
ACTIVITY
In teams of three, formulate
scenarios from past work
experiences.
ACTIVITY
Conduct Demonstrations Persuasion
Sequence Techniques using Real –
Life scenarios.
Part Seven
Improving Future Performance
Improving Future Performance
Improving Future Performance


• Are you OK? Wellness Check
• How do you think you did? What
  happened?
• Positive comment, if possible
• What would you do different next time?
• Instructor, role player, and/or peer jury
  comments
• Instructor Summation
Improving Future Performance


 • Always Keep Professional Face
 • Always Treat Others As You Would Want
   To Be Treated . . . Under Identical
   Circumstances
 • Never Inflate People With Adrenaline
 • Flexibility Is Strength - Rigidity Weakness
 • Redirect Rather Than Resist.
Improving Future Performance


• It’s Not Enough To BE Good, You Have To
  LOOK Good & SOUND Good, or It’s NO Good!


• Never Step On One’s Personal Face!


• People are Like Steel - When We Lose Our
  Temper We Are Useless!
Improving Future Performance


How will this training affect my
relationships?

At Work?
At Home?
In Community?
END

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VDI _Family Protective_Services

  • 1. Verbal Defense & Influence DFPS Basic Instructor Class Jan 7 – 11, 2013
  • 4. Acknowledgements • Dr. George Thompson President • Mike Manley Vice President • Lee Fjelstad Vice President • Gary T. Klugiewicz PoliceOne / Vistelar Group • Tony Pinelle VDI Master Trainer • Peter Harrell Jr. VDI Master Trainer
  • 13. Klugiewicz Background • Martial Artist • Milwaukee County Sheriff’s Office • DAAT / POSC Program Developer • Calibre Press Street Survival Instructor • H&K / Team One Network • Verbal Judo / Verbal Defense & Influence • PoliceOne / CorrectionsOne
  • 14. Harrell Background • Senior Consultant Verbal Judo/Verbal Defense & Influence • Organization and Development Specialist • Keynote Speaker • Actor • Father
  • 16. Verbal Judo Exposure • Heard the term • Attended a conference presentation • Limited exposure in other classes • Attended a short orientation session • Took a one or two day class • Attended an Instructor class • Consider yourself an VJ Operator
  • 17. Verbal Judo Verbal Judo is a well established method of providing people with Tactical Communication skills. Any situation has the potential for getting out of hand. Knowing how to “redirect a person’s behavior with words” is a person’s most important communication tool for keeping everyone safe.
  • 18. Welcome • Registration • Welcome / Overview – Table Top Materials / Name Tags • Build Binder / Manual Orientation • Participant Expectation Guidelines • Training Safety Rules • Videotaping Orientation / Instructor Introduction • Attendee Background / Duties / Expectations • Assignments - Reading • Performance Testing Choices • Certificates
  • 19. Instructor Roles & Responsibilities • Registration • Welcome / Overview – Table Top Materials / Name Tags • Build Binder / Manual Orientation • Participant Expectation Guidelines • Training Safety Rules • Videotaping Orientation / Instructor Introduction • Attendee Background / Duties / Expectations • Assignments - Reading • Performance Testing Choices • Certificates
  • 20. Student Expectation Guidelines • Minimum of 90% Attendance with Make Up • Open Mind / Positive Attitude • Compliance with Training Safety Rules • Contact Instructor if Late / Absent • Successful Completion of Practical Exercises • At least 80% on All Written Tests • Complete and Turn In Final Evaluations
  • 21. Student Expectation Guidelines • When we listen with the intent to teach, we learn at a deeper level. • When we teach, we gain new insight and our learning expands, Stephen Covey
  • 22. Classroom Management • Instructor One Voice – Stop Immediately • Instructor Raised Hand – Finish your sentence but not the paragraph • Student “STOP” Notification Statement –Use whenever you don’t understand what is being said by the instructor • Use of electronic equipment
  • 23. How the Class will be Taught 1. Demonstration 2. Explanation 3. Repetition 4. Simulation
  • 27. Retaining Knowledge 1. Hearing 2. Seeing 3. Doing 4. Experiencing 5. Teaching Karen Spencer, PhD. Purposeful Teaching
  • 28. Student Expectation Guidelines • When we listen with the intent to teach, we learn at a deeper level. • When we teach, we gain new insight and our learning expands, Stephen Covey
  • 29. Learning Pyramid % 1. 5% Lecture 2. 10% Reading 3. 20% Audiovisual 4. 30% Demonstration 5. 50% Group Discussion 6. 75% Learning by Doing 7. 90% Teaching Others Adapted from David Sousa, How the Brain Learns by Cynthia Furse, University of Utah
  • 30. Goals of the Course • PERSONAL SAFETY • Enhanced Professionalism • Decreased Citizen Complaints • Decreased Vicarious Liability • Lessen Stress • Court Power & Articulation • Increased Staff Morale
  • 31. Program Format • Self – Assessment • Professionalism • Communication Theory • Tactics
  • 34. Self - Assessment Who are you?
  • 37. Five Universal Truths 1. All people want to be treated with dignity and respect. 2. All people want to be asked rather than being told to do something. 3. All people want to be told why they are being asked to do something. 4. All people want to be to be given options rather than threats. 5. All people want a second chance.
  • 38. Five Universal Truths 1 DFPS Staff treat others: 5 1. ALWAYS TREAT OTHERS with dignity and respect. 2. ASK THEM, don’t tell them to do something. 3. TELL THEM WHY they should do it. 4. GIVE OPTIONS, not threats. 5. GIVE THEM a second chance, if appropriate.
  • 39. Five Universal Truths Regardless of differences, all people want; 1) To be treated with dignity & respect. 2) To be asked rather than told to do something. 3) To be told why they’re being asked to do something. 4) To be given options rather than threats. 5) To be given a 2nd chance. © Verbal Defense & Influence with Adapted from ‘5 Universal Truths of Verbal Judo’ by Dr. Thompson of the Verbal Judo Institute. ©2008 Verbal Judo® the Verbal Judo Institute, Inc. 39
  • 40. © Verbal Defense & Influence with the Verbal Judo Institute, Inc. 40
  • 41. ACTIVITY Pick a partner and teach 5 UT Then discuss how it may improve the agency, and your life.
  • 43. Good Decision Making? • Why do you make such good decisions? • Experience • How do you get experience? • Bad Decisions
  • 44. Traits of a Professional • High Visibility • Quick Decisions • Codified Body of Knowledge • Continuous Training • Adapt to Change • Ethical Standard of Conduct • Licensed; Badge A Symbol Of
  • 47. Tactical 8 Step Concept
  • 50. Universal Greeting Script 8.1 Good Morning, 8.2 I’m Gary Klugiewicz, a consultant with Verbal Defense & Influence. 8.3 The reason I am here this morning is to introduce my partner Peter Harrell Jr. who is  He is currently a senior consultant for Verbal Defense & Influence  He is an actor with 40 years experience  Retired state employee  Father/Spouse 8.6 One of Peter’s expectations for the class is to have the participants perform Tactical Communication Tactics with people they interact with at work, their clients, as well as their family, friends, and others.
  • 51. Universal Greeting (a.) • Morning Coffee • 8.1. Good Morning, _____________ • (Use customer service representatives name, if known) • 8.2. My name is ________________. I am a guest in Room 204. • 8.3. The reason that I am contacting you is that its 4AM and wanted to get a cup a coffee. I noticed that there is no coffee machine in the room. • 8.4. Is there somewhere in the hotel where I can get a cup of coffee?
  • 52. Universal Greeting (b.) • Information Gathering • I am … (Title / Name) from the … (List your agency). • I am here to attend this Verbal Defense & Influence Course. I have been asked to interview you. • May I ask you name, title, current assignment, any personal information that you would like to disclose, and one of your expectations for the class?
  • 53. Universal Greeting (c.) • Partner Introduction to Class • Good Morning… • I am … (Title / Name) from the … (List your agency). • The reason I am here this morning is to introduce … Introduce your partner with name, rank, agency, position with other background and personal information as noted. • Explain one of your partner’s expectations for the class
  • 54. ACTIVITY Using one of the introduction scripts, introduce your partner to group.
  • 55. The Goal of Professional Intervention is to Generate Voluntary Compliance, Cooperation and Collaboration
  • 59. Overcoming A Natural Adversarial Relationship Our Job To Meet & Greet and O.N.A.R. Overcome Natural Adversarial Relationship
  • 60. Our Service To The Community We Think For Others As They Might Think For Themselves 48-72 Hours Later.
  • 61. Professionalism Concept Learn to stop REACTING and start RESPONDING to the ongoing situation.
  • 62. Tactical Cognitive Dissonance TCD is a professional survival trait at allows you to leave your Personal Value System at home and utilize your Professional Value System at work creating an Alter Ego that will keep you and others safe.
  • 63. Maintaining Emotional Equilibrium NO MIND Dis / interest Non Bias
  • 64. Maintaining Emotional Equilibrium MUSHIN is: Professional Detachment A Habit of Mind One must remain Open , Flexible and Unbiased.
  • 65. Maintaining Emotional Equilibrium What is your public professional face? • Affect • Calm, Still Center • Become an Chameleon • You are what you look like • You are what you sound like
  • 67. ACTIVITY Pick a different partner, and use a professional face appropriate for work; home.
  • 68. Maintaining Emotional Equilibrium Chief Harry Dolan’s “Rule of 24” • 24 hours • 24 minutes • 24 seconds
  • 69. Maintaining Emotional Equilibrium A term used to mentally give you a tactical mind set for the task at hand. A reminder to use your professional face and words that will generate voluntary compliance, cooperation and collaboration.
  • 74. ACTIVITY Pick a different partner, and discuss what methods you currently are using to keep your “emotional equilibrium.” What are some steps you could both use in the future?
  • 75. Know Your Weaknesses Name It: “Mr. Better Than” Define It: He Who . . . Hot Buttons or Challenges My Authority Triggers The Path To Strength Is Built On Recognized Weaknesses.
  • 76. ACTIVITY Discuss with your partner two “weaknesses” you are currently aware of. Design a “trigger guard” for your weaknesses.
  • 77. How many people are usually told about a negative contact?
  • 78. It has been estimated that seventeen persons are told about an negative employee contact that is seen by only one person. How may people are told about an event witnessed by 100’s or 1000’s of spectators?
  • 79. The Contact Professional • In Contact With Self • In Contact With The Organization • In Contact With The Subject.
  • 80. The Contact Professional Who Do You Represent? 1. Self 2. 3. 4. 5.
  • 81. ACTIVITY Pick a different partner, and discuss what how you became a professional.
  • 86. Ethical Intervention Concept ETHOS = “Self” Ethical intervention is "the representative self acting to uphold the standard of conduct expected by one's office. Whenever our 'personal self' acts in contradiction to our 'representative self' we need another to act for us as we would act under better conditions--hence "Ethical Intervention.” In other words, Ethical Intervention is an act that helps sustain our best Representational Power under stress. It is, then, THE act of the Art of Representation. Dr. George Thompson
  • 87. Ethical Intervention Concept You are the representative • Isn’t it true that at the point of contact, a single employee “represents” the whole organization for better… or worse? • What kind of representative are you?
  • 90. Ethical Intervention Concept There are no longer any innocent professional bystanders. • Assist your fellow staff members • Fix something if it’s going wrong • Stop something that’s wrong • But no matter what, you need to write a report that explains what you observed.
  • 93. Ethical Intervention Concept 1. Protection from a Sudden Assault 2. Protection from Poor Tactics: Staff Safety Violations 3. Protection from Policy Violations 4. Protection from Out of Control Behavior
  • 96. Verbal Intervention • Simply talk to your partner • “Showtime” • “Be Careful Partner” • “Knock It Off” • Investigator Tap Out • Call for Assistance
  • 97. Chief Dolan’s “Knock It Off” • Previous generations of employees in the workplace simply did what they were asked to do with little debate. Many younger employees have been raised demanding to know “why”. So tell them “why” and see how quickly they come on board. • Most importantly, when their actions or comments are inconsistent with your organizations mission, tell them to “Knock It Off”.
  • 100. Platinum Rule Treat others as you would like to be treated under the same circumstances.
  • 101. Cultivating the Art of Courtesy
  • 102. Cultivating the Art of Courtesy
  • 105. Three Kinds of People There are 102 Cultures in the U.S. But Only Three Kinds of People
  • 106. Three Kinds of People
  • 108. ACTIVITY Pick a different partner, and discuss what how you have handled difficult people in the past. At work? At home? In the community?
  • 113. Communication Theory The opposite of talking should be LISTENING but for most people it is WAITING TO INTERRUPT!
  • 114. Be Alert & Decisive • Remain Alert • Be Decisive • Have a preplanned, practiced response in mind
  • 115. L.E.A.P.S. Concept • You must be Unbiased, Flexible, and Open • Hear Literally • Interpret Accurately • Act Appropriately
  • 116. The Great Equalizer If you don’t listen to what the person is saying, watch what they are doing, and put everything in “context” of the current situation and the distance you are from the person, you will never see the argument, complaint and/or assault coming.
  • 117. Listening Components • Words • Tone of Voice • Facial Expressions • Body Language • Context of the Situation • Distance / Positioning
  • 118. L.E.A.P.S. Concept Empathize • To See Through The Others Eyes • Construct A Verbal Means To Relate To The Subject • You Do Not Have To Agree… Simply Understand The Others Perspective.
  • 119. L.E.A.P.S. Concept Tactical Empathy
  • 120. L.E.A.P.S. Concept Listening & Empathizing • Listening gives you intel on where the subject is today. • Empathizing gives you intel on where the subject has been in the past. • Combining knowing where the subject is today and has been in the past gives you the best predictor of where the subject is going to go in the near future.
  • 121. ACTIVITY Discuss with your group a time when you could have used empathy but didn’t. What was the result? How does one attain empathy?
  • 122. L.E.A.P.S. Concept Ask (Five Types of Questions) • Fact Finding • General • Direct • Leading • Opinion Seeking.
  • 127. L.E.A.P.S. Concept “Sword of Interruption Technique” Say … “Excuse me, let me see, you seem to be (feeling/emotion) _______________ because of (content/reason) ________________.”
  • 130. L.E.A.P.S. Concept • Anti – Peace Phrases • Calm Down! • What’s Your Problem? • You People… • Come Over Here! • I’m not going to tell you again… • Because these are the rules!
  • 132. ACTIVITY Teach the concept of LEAPS to a group of three. Each person will take a turn. Discuss with your triad, which LEAPS concepts you are currently using. Which ones do you need work on.
  • 136. Art of Mediation People in crisis are often under the influences of: • Rage • Anger • FEAR • Frustration • The Unknown • They are “trapped” in a box…We must open the box with options.
  • 139. The Art Of Translation
  • 140. The Art Of Translation
  • 143. “Self As Seen By Self”
  • 145. Street Truth • Street Truth # 3 • 93% of your success is determined by your delivery style.
  • 147. Communication Theory 93% = Delivery Style
  • 148. Communication Theory Content Credibility = Credo Belief Power & Influence History
  • 149. Communication Theory VOICE • 33 – 40% • How you Say it If there is a contradiction between “Content” and “Voice”, which should you believe?
  • 150. Communication Theory VOICE • Tone = Attitude • Pace = Speed • Pitch = High/Soft • Modulation = Ebb & Flow The Voice is a window of a person’s intentions.
  • 151. Communication Theory ROLE VS VOICE
  • 160. ACTIVITY Form teams of 3-4 and debrief film. (1) Use tactics learned to improve response. (2) Demonstrate improved response to class.
  • 162. ACTIVITY This section of the class will involve…
  • 165. Proxemics (prok-se-miks) The study of the cultural, behavioral, and sociological aspects of spatial distances between individuals.
  • 169. Proxemics • Note: These tactics were develop by Gary T. Klugiewicz with contributions from Tony Pinelle, Joel Lashley, and Doug Lynch based on material provided by Dr. George Thompson and numerous nationally known defensive tactics and crisis management instructors • • • © 2012 Verbal Defense & Influence
  • 174. Proxemics R.A.M. Reasonable Arc of Movement
  • 192. ACTIVITY Form teams of 3-4 and discuss “Anatomy of a Verbal Assault”.
  • 193. Tactics Anatomy of a Verbal Assault 1. What are the reasons for verbal assaults? 2. How do you control your personal/professional face? 3. In the past, how have you handled verbal assaults? At work? At Home?
  • 194. Tactics • Types of Verbal Assaults • Authority • Profanity • Personal Threats • Family Safety • Other Staff
  • 195. Tactics • Types of Verbal Assaults • Physical Features • Age/Sex/Sexuality • Skill/Competence • Education • Economic Status
  • 199. Tactics • Funny Word Blocks (Quick, Appropriate, no Counter Punch) • Serious Word Blocks • Polite Threat Word Blocks • Mobilizing the Audience Word Blocks • Sudden Assault (Time Out) Word Blocks
  • 201. Tactics Combination Deflectors • I hear what you’re saying, and I got that, however… • I hear that, and I’m listening, but… • You seem upset, and I’m sorry you feel that way, however…
  • 202. Tactics EXAMPLE Comment: “Why are you at my house again, I get tired of ya’ll coming here. Don’t you have anything better to do than bother us?” Response: “ I can see you are upset, I’m here again to get some information we need to be able to assist your family.”
  • 203. ACTIVITY Your team will create two real life scenarios from your work experience and use deflectors to handle verbal abuse.
  • 208. Tactics 1. Listen 2. Empathize 3. Ask 4. Paraphrase 5. Summarize
  • 211. Tactics • Security • Attack • Flight • Excessive Repetition • Revised Priorities
  • 221. The Art Of Translation
  • 224. Five Universal Truths 1 DFPS Staff treat others: 5 1. ALWAYS TREAT OTHERS with dignity and respect. 2. ASK THEM, don’t tell them to do something. 3. TELL THEM WHY they should do it. 4. GIVE OPTIONS, not threats. 5. GIVE THEM a second chance, if appropriate.
  • 231. ACTIVITY In teams of three, formulate scenarios from past work experiences.
  • 232. ACTIVITY Conduct Demonstrations Persuasion Sequence Techniques using Real – Life scenarios.
  • 236. Improving Future Performance • Are you OK? Wellness Check • How do you think you did? What happened? • Positive comment, if possible • What would you do different next time? • Instructor, role player, and/or peer jury comments • Instructor Summation
  • 237. Improving Future Performance • Always Keep Professional Face • Always Treat Others As You Would Want To Be Treated . . . Under Identical Circumstances • Never Inflate People With Adrenaline • Flexibility Is Strength - Rigidity Weakness • Redirect Rather Than Resist.
  • 238. Improving Future Performance • It’s Not Enough To BE Good, You Have To LOOK Good & SOUND Good, or It’s NO Good! • Never Step On One’s Personal Face! • People are Like Steel - When We Lose Our Temper We Are Useless!
  • 239. Improving Future Performance How will this training affect my relationships? At Work? At Home? In Community?
  • 240. END

Notas del editor

  1. dfwrsg
  2. Say: “These are the concepts embedded in our Matrix…
  3. Read slide… Explain concept
  4. Say: “Lets take a snapshot of where we are in our lives”
  5. Say “What are these?’”Response: Brands, Logos, Companies etc.“We believe that your last name is YOUR brand”“So, lets see how that brand is represented.”
  6. Say:“In a moment or two you will share two questions with a partner. Who are you, and what would you like to change about the way you communicate.”Say: “I’m pretty sure most of us did not awaken today and say, ‘Who am I”, so let me offer some help…”
  7. Say: “This is a list of attributes or principles that many people use in order to describe themselves.” Pick three that you feel you exemplify, at this moment.”Say: “Now take five minutes and share w/partner those two questions. It may be difficult to have this discussion without mentioning ‘what we do’…”
  8. Say: “What is professionalism? How many of you took a course in college called ‘Professionalism’?a ”Say: “What does it mean to be professional? How do you become professional?Responses: Various
  9. Say: “On the count of three, say the word Showtime with me… 1-2-3 SHOWTIME!”Say: Read slide definition…Say: “When are other good times to say this term? At home…in the community etc.”
  10. Say: “The ShowTime mindset helps us focus on the task at hand, avoiding distractions that deal with moods, feelings, and circumstances. We are ready to generate the 3 C’s in the most effective way”.
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