Jim&Deana

IN THIS YEAR OF OUR LIFE...
WE LOVED

Wednesday, December 30, 2009

IN LATE SEPTEMBER OF 2008, OUR FRIEND
EILEEN HOSTED A DINNER PARTY...

...AND SOON AFTER THAT NIGHT, WE KNEW
WE WERE ON A VIRTUOUS PATH


THIS IS THE EMAIL AND PHOTO ACCOUNT
OF ONE COUPLE, ONE YEAR, AND ONE UNION

Eileen Romesser What! you are engaged? When
did this happen? I can't wait to hear the details.
Congrats!
4 hours ago · Comment · Like · See Wall-to-Wall

Jim Cavan It was hilarious. I was really drunk
and asked her to carry me, and she just started
crying. It was too late then.
3 hours ago · Delete

Deana ! Aulisio hee hee. no, it wasn't like
that, we were more just like walking zeph on
the beach and stumbled upon a heart rock
shrine... and then he pulled a beautiful ring out.
10 minutes ago · Delete


Pure Love, Organic and Simple
❝You have no idea how grateful and excited I am to
have found you. In this short month, I feel like a
completely renewed person. Thank you for being so “Just spent a few minutes
open and caring. Please don't fear the potential of swimming through our past
corespondances. I say swimming
us because, to me, this all feels immensely potent,
because reading them ﬁlls me with
substantial, and steadfast.❞ a wondrous, eﬀortless sense of
❥Deana suspended bliss, as I feel our words
grow and shimmer, shine and
blossom, chiming like an epic poem
read beneath some dusk-soaked
banyan in the breeze, sequentially,
organically.... In recounting these
epic months, I realize how much
sense this all makes, and has always
made, and how senseless so much
seemed before. “ n Jim


Deana
My mother, Marsha, used to say to me, “you’re too picky Deana,
and you nag, will you ever find a man that’s good enough?”
Although I know my mom has been right many times, I also know
my patience was a virtue. I just couldn’t settle, not until I met a

Who am I? man who brought peace to my mind and made my heart beat with
purpose.
As Jim says, I’m a busy bee, constantly finding something to clean,
create, or check off the list. Both being of the sign Taurus, our
home is our sanctuary. Since we bought our first house together in
June, we’ve made it a sacred space, hanging pictures of friends and
family, caring for our flowers and pets, cooking lots of veggies and
local meat for guests, composting, soon setting our rooms’ moods
with non-VOC paints, and hanging our laundry to dry.
I feel a great gratitude for my “work”; I’ve been in college
consistently since 1997. I just couldn’t give up the learning,
growing, doing, being. I knew I wanted to live in a clean and
wholesome environment, so I chose to study just that. My work
has evolved from cleaning up polluted rivers to investigating
potential for algae-based biofuels to charting the social impacts of
the consumer products we buy (some of you may know, and as Jim
likes to tease me, Walmart is my “sugarmama”).
I believe in sustainability, not only of the environment, but also of
the body. I’ve practiced yoga for nearly 10 years and now do my
best to share it with others, including Jim. Yoga gives meaning to
life, it teaches you how to love and find peace, and it creates a
virtuous cycle of change. These are all attributes that have helped
me build a sustainable, compassionate, and compromising
relationship with Jim.


I’m Jim – Michigan born and raised. I came to New Hampshire in 2001 to
attend UNH. I never looked back. To be 30 minutes from the sea, an hour
from the mountains, and minutes from any number of outdoor wonders, was
Jim
as much a factor in my coming out here as anything academic – even more so,
I think. I’ve always had a keen love of the outdoors, something my father,
Paul, helped instill at a very young age.

I majored in Philosophy – I know, real growth industry, right? After college I
Who I be.
worked a number of jobs that ﬂuctuated between “soul-crushing” and
“tolerable” on the reward scale. Then in 2009, a few months after I met and
fell in love with Deana, I was offered a job working for the Green Alliance, a
Seacoast-based “green business union” that helps local businesses improve
and build on their sustainability efforts. It doesn’t pay a whole heck of a lot,
but it’s as rewarding as anything I could imagine, and it has allowed me to
meet and work with so many exciting, dynamic, and truly active members of
our community. Despite tough times, we’ve all done our part to help revitalize
the local economy and, in our own, small way, help the planet as well.

I met Deana just a year ago this last September. I was debating about whether
to go to a dinner party of an acquaintance. I’m sure the other option was C-
SPAN or ESPN. Deana came downstairs a few minutes after we arrived. Soon
after that we were chopping cilantro together. Soon after that we were talking
alone on the porch. Soon after that she inexplicably went up to bed – at 9:30
on a Saturday for early morning yoga. Soon after that I started thinking on
her. I never stopped.

With Deana I’ve found a love that seems a dozen lives in the making – our
understanding runs deep and true, and our synchronicity is nothing but
otherworldly. We love each other, and we love what we do – full as both of
our paths are with opportunities to truly make a difference, all the while
strengthened by our mutual respect, adoration, and love we feel has spanned
lifetimes leading to this. I may have come to New Hampshire and never
looked back, but it’s looking forward that gives me the greatest feeling of
satisfaction.


D: A lot of people don't believe in this type of love -
one that keeps getting better with time. Is it
sustainable? I have to admit that I am freaked out that
this is all some honeymoon phase that's going to drop off
like a bell curve. I know I can't let pessimism pervade
my head; the idea that we’ll reach some plateau is a much
better concept. Or even better, can we grow exponentially?

J: I'm glad you're
taking this "honeymoon
phase" in stride. I
can understand the
bell curve worry...
though at the same
time I can't, because
I honestly have never
felt a love grow and
breathe like this. Our
love lives -- it is
its own life, and
therefore can only
grow.
I was never much of a
math whiz, but this is
one formula I feel
blessed to have sail
over my head, and,
with a strike surreal,
straight through my
heart and soul.


A Winter Walk at Adam’s Point

“How do you conjure up such beautiful words? Can I just get inside
that mind of yours and let your thoughts surround me like cool
breezes and sea mist? And you can curl up inside my heart to
feel the warm, glowing ﬁre that keeps burning for you.” *D

Traversing Traverse City
Michigan
New Years 2009

" These words are as much yours as mine. You draw them out
of me like breaths, as steady and as effortless. You've inspired
and invigorated my mind unlike anyone, ever -- these words are
just my feeble attempt to capture and make sense of it -- make
sense of you.

Knees ever-weakening,
Jim


Road Trip...
Great Lakes, Great Times UofM

Chicago

Friends

Family


Feeling at home
“i’m looking
forward to every
second of this
adventure,
especially the
moment when i
carry you in our
front door :-*”
❧J


WHEN MOM’S AWAY,
THE CAT WILL PLAY

“I came home to Gonzo completely out of
his mind -- more attention starved than
anything. He would not leave me alone the
hour I stayed up, scratching my legs and
goading me into playing a number of times. He
woke me up promptly again at 8am --
presumably because he knows that's how late
dad sleeps. Anyway, we both miss Zephie and
our mom, and can't wait to see you both :-*”
J


LIKE FATHER, LIKE SON

The smile... obviously genetic


“You were amazing today, bringing unrivaled light to a day that threatened all
but -- being not merely my girlfriend, not merely my lover, but a true, genuine
partner, in life as in love. Thank you for being so present. Thank you for
being you. Tears nearly well as I think upon it all, to be choked only in
smiles. And as long as I can hold this feeling into slumber, filled with movies
of you, flashing in reels seamless, unhindered, and unbroken; into tomorrow,
whose first thought will doubtless be remembering how much I love you.” ❀ Jimmy


I want to be there to support you
when you need me. What you
Island in Maine where we experience, I want to be there to
spent our 1st Anniversary experience too. Mostly because I
want you to believe that love
can be everlasting and sustain
two people's lives. Sometimes I
imagine a fairytale of what my
relationship will be. And I know
th e r e i s n o s u c h r e a l i t y t o i t . B u t
I do feel like two people in love
can connect on a completely
different level of consciousness,
th a t t h e y c a n a c t a s o n e i n t h i s
life. I feel that in our passionate
intimacy, in the verses you write
to m e , i n o u r d e s i r e t o c o n s t a n t l y
be with each other, and in waking
u p n e x t t o y o u .

Deana


San Fran


TAURUS
...So you've burroughed into me, my heart and my
mind, soul and vision, with movements ever new yet
familiarly grounded and tangible. Our words traded in
gentle facing breaths, promises marked for tomorrow's
fulfillment, souls knowing no home but in that which we
will always share...

At Once Breathless and Breathing, J

Now that, Jim, that was a love letter above all others. And as I settle down at my computer with
the food we cooked together, stored in it energy and love and goodness, that I now taste on my
tongue exploding flavor like your kisses, I appreciate you more than ever. Sometimes I remember
my life before you and it seems so distant, so different. I don't know who I was then. This love we
have is so incredibly grounded, yet ever-evolving. How we have achieved that, only God knows.
Perhaps it is our Taurus nature. Your Sweet Dea


IF WE COULD LEARN TO TRANSFER OUR ENERGY, BUT CONTAIN IT
WITHIN EACH OF US, HOW POWERFUL OUR LOVE WOULD BECOME...


WE WILL

Will we one day
some time strewn afar
be what we see now
or love as we are?

Will next year’s passing
Today’s smiles bleeding to tomorrow’s
pass in rainbows
which render fleeting all and any sorrows?

Will our twin blue eyes
one pair mirrors of the other
still find their gaze
Through the warm dark ‘neath the covers?

Will the love we make, then
the love of old souls joined anew
still ring through walls
Whispers cherished, though those be few?

Will the life we paint, frame, ....Questions pondered through incredible now
hang upon our one soul’s sturdy wall Answered not in the if, but the how
In lives to come, leave room to add Questions becoming answers, prayers fulfilled
colors unnamed, untamed, na’er to fall? As “Will we?” surrenders to “We will...”


In this Future Before US
Live and learn and love...
And work – you have to work, but do something with a purpose... give back
to the community. Be a part of where you live. Know and be known.
T not to let career shadow the true work - family, planet, and good deeds.
ry
Understand the government and the economy. Vote. Be worldly - act locally.
Take only what we need and waste little. Give away to those less fortunate.
Face sacrifices and struggles with courage, satisfactions and steps forward
with gusto...
And snuggling – always snuggling, for it’s daily medicine.
Lots of lazy summer evenings and cozy winter holidays with close friends and
local beer and global stories.
A first-born - the big sister, helpful and creative. Later - an inquisitive,
achieving boy … A balanced family all in love.
The pitter-patter of tiny feet, cuts and bruises and family hikes in the snow,
dog kisses and kitty purrs, weekend farmer’s markets and chemical free
products. Sports games, music and books over TV and video games.
Someday, grandchildren and great grandchildren and a planet better than
how we found it … Old age with a child’s soul still – not two but many now,
just like in all lives lived and yet to come.
We were born and we grew. We grew and we learned. We learned and we saw.
We saw and we met. We met, and we knew.


Jim&Deana

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