De has been eliminated from the Utterly Hallucinatory Spider Jerusalem Vetinari Bachelor Challenge on Day 4. While she made it further than expected, reaching the final four contestants, she did not receive the three bolts of chemistry that Styx and Kaiyah earned with Spider Jerusalem. As a result, De leaves the competition without any Spider Jerusalem babies.
Spider Jerusalem's Completely Hypothetical Bachelor Challenge, Day 4
1. It's Day 4 of the Utterly Hallucinatory Spider Jerusalem Vetinari Bachelor Challenge!
Four lucky SimSelves are battling it out for the affections of the hot Legacy spare-spawn.
Will there be groping? Will there be slapping? Will there be inappropriate hot tub conversations? Only one way to find out!
2. These are the four SimSelves who are still in the game:
Kaiyah (Kaiyah/Kaiyah2; Legacy Shmegacy), with a score of 136, and Kendra (riot.fighter/riotgrrl 4271; the Punk Legacy),
with a score of 135, have been on the top of the heap since the first day. Styx (StyxLady/lorddaeos; Just Another Legacy),
with a score of 126, and De (fireflower314; fireflowersims@livejournal.com; the Morgan and Pierce Legacies), with a score of
125, have closed the gap, and on Day 4, it's anyone's game!
3. And here's Spider Jerusalem Vetinari: Reaper child son of Gen 2 Uglacy spare Cypress Vetinari, he's enjoying the freedom of
Pleasantview, and is not the tormented, introverted, lonely Spider Jerusalem of the Dualegacy.
If you'd like more Vetinari goodness, check out the Vetinari Dualegacy on DrSupremeNerd's SimPage or the Boolprop.com
forums.
4. So, here's the observation post. Mostly it's not furnished because I am lazy, but this is where we've all been hanging out.
5. "Yeah, we're feeling sort of lazy here in the observation post today. Larch is busy stalking Di, and Spider Jerusalem--who's
been here for two days now--is playing Rock Paper Scissors with Stacilee. Now, Cassidy... Cassidy's scoring some Aspiration
points with the matchmaker."
SimNerd: SimSelf of DrSupremeNerd, creator of the Vetinari Dualegacy, currently replaying part of Gen 4 due to some
glitchtasticness.
6. "Date! Black hair! A guy with black hair! Facial hair a plus! No makeup! I have given you loads of money, get me a date!"
Cassidy Vetinari: half-alien son of Gen 2 Uglacy spare Cypress.
7. Gilbert: "Have I been brought here for kissing?"
Matchmaker: "Thank me later."
Cassidy: "Hey, don't Romance Sims and Pleasure Sims throw a bolt or two just on general principle? This is the least sucky
Matchmaker date ever! ...No offense."
Matchmaker: "None taken."
11. OK, one Chat, one Joke, and a couple of mild Flirts, and we already have Crushing.
Don't know why Gilbert is thinking about Larch.
And it turns out that if you make Gilbert selectable, bump him up into gold Aspiration, and change his Turnons with the Orb-a-
ma-bob, he and Cassidy get three bolts.
12. Gilbert: "I'm rolling all sorts of Romance Sim Wants right now."
Cass: "I think my Pleasure Sim Wants are right there with you."
13. I've never had Sims with three bolts while they'd just met and were on a first date. They're Crushing, and the date's not even
to Great yet, but the Hold Hands passes with flying colors.
15. Gilbert: Romance Sim likes dating!
Cass: Pleasure Sim likes dating!
Spider: Hey, that guy dancing with my brother sort of looks like... Gilbert. Naaaaah.
21. Di: "... and then Henry heart-farted me as he was being arrested! How embarrassing!"
SimNerd: "You should have just whipped out Rodney's Death Creator instead of messing with prison."
Di: "You're one to talk!"
SimNerd: "Touche."
Larch: "Pssst! Di! Call me!"
Di: Dicreasy, writer of the Victorian Legacy.
Larch Vetinari: Gen 2 Uglacy heir, Eeevil half-naked finger-gunner.
22. Stacilee: "Best 200 out of 300?"
Spider: "Sure!"
Stacilee (stacilee/stacierearden): writer of the Whedonberry Alphabet Legacy.
Yeah, I don't think we're going to get a whole lot of introducing out of this crowd today.
23. Gin: "They're really slacking off over there today, aren't they?"
Michelle: "Yeah, like sitting around on the couches chatting is soooo tiring."
Orikes: "Oh, I don't know, it's not like any of us are going to begrudge Cassidy slides. Or, you know, a decent boyfriend."
Gin: GintasticNecat, writer of The Science of a Legacy, eliminated on Day 3.
Michelle: MichelleFobbs/MichaelFobbs, writer of the Planetary Apocalypse, eliminated on Day 2.
Orikes: Orikes/orikes360, writer of the Pseudo Legacy, eliminated on Day 1.
24. Gin: "I'm not sure I can get behind Gilbert."
Michelle: "You have to get over the poking incident."
Orikes: "And hey, he's better than Mr. Big Jerk!"
Michelle: "Who isn't? At least I got to give that creep a smackdown!"
Gin: "I got to torch Cypress!"
Orikes: "I think I got the best deal--Larch's childrinions! And, you know, Larch!"
Yes, we treat our non-winners well around here.
25. Orikes: "Well, if they're not going to introduce the challenge, we'll just have to do it ourselves!"
Michelle: "It's Day 4, right?"
Gin: "Yup. So that means more hot tubbing..."
Orikes: "A Share Interests..."
Michelle: "And three Flirts! We were promised some riskier Flirts today, which means Spider Jerusalem gets to do some
groping!"
Gin: "I missed groping by a day."
Michelle: "With your score, you wouldn't have let him grope anyway."
Gin: "...Yeah..."
Orikes: "Anyone want to take any bets on whether Styx or Kaiyah's the first one to mention kissing in the hot tub?"
Michelle: "Or if anyone will get the Big Red Hearts of Love today?"
Gin: "Or who's going to reject the touchy-feely Flirts?"
All will be revealed!
I've tuned the season to Spring, so the relationships shouldn't build as quickly as they have been the last few days.
26. There's time for a snack before the hot-tubbing begins.
Kendra: "So, yeah, it's the Punk Legacy, have you heard of it?"
De: "Perhaps in passing..."
I have Spider Jerusalem jump in the hot tub and Ask the SimSelves to Join...
27. Kendra: "Maybe I shouldn't have had all that turkey..."
Yeah, that expanding waistline just cost you a shot in Spider Jerusalem's hot tub. Now you get to Work Out while everyone
else enjoys the hot tub.
28. Yup, it's Styx, Kaiyah, and De in the hot tub with Spider Jerusalem.
31. Kaiyah: "Hey, I'm in the lead over here; I think I'll be sticking around!"
Styx: "The scores are closer than you think, Kaiyah!"
De: "Yeah, it's anyone's game!"
33. De: "What is it with you and kissing, Kaiyah? We haven't even done any yet!"
Kaiyah: "I'm anticipating the gloriousness of Spider Jerusalem smoochies."
Styx: "Spider! Yoohoo!"
47. "Eh, undeniably hot, but hotness isn't everything. Sometimes you need to be able to talk about things. Like killing Gilbert,
which I probably can't do now, considering the way he and Cassidy were all over each other."
65. "So, has your feeling on graphs changed from Day 2?"
66. "You know, I've come around to your way of thinking!"
This one sort of made me scratch my head. She ended the Chat on Day 2 when Spider Jerusalem started talking about
graphs, but now she's all in favor. I didn't know they could do that! Styx is really playing for keeps now.
75. "I like all the things you can do in the dark. Perhaps with sexy lamps."
76. "Oh yes, the possibilities certainly are endless!"
77. "What are your feelings towards seeing the deaths of your mortal enemies?"
78. "There's nothing more punk than death!"
I did not expect this. All the Share Interest topics were accepted wholeheartedly, with nary a red X in sight.
Time for the Flirts, and that means time for Spider Jerusalem to get some groping!
79. My Flirts of choice today are Hold Hands, Caress, and Goose. I don't anticipate any of them rejecting the Hold Hands, but
the other two...
No shock that Kendra accepts the Hold Hands.
80. Kendra: "Whoa, whoa, whoa, nobody touches the glasses!"
Spider: "But they're so... punk-y..."
Ooh, Kendra stones Spider Jerusalem on the Caress! Will she let him go for the grope, or is her position in the house going
to become tenuous?
82. Spider: "I wanna grope again now!"
De: "What is it with you and groping?"
Spider: "I have nine outgoing and one nice point."
De: "Oh yeah."
83. De: "Isn't this better than groping?"
Spider: "It's better than nothing, but better than groping? Naaaaaah."
84. De: "I'm not on board with the groping, Spider Jerusalem."
And she's really not--Grope (er, Goose, I mean Goose) isn't an option, so I go for Suggestion
instead.
85. Spider: "So whaddaya say? You, me, groping?"
De: "Weeeelllll... maybe later."
If Styx and Kaiyah have Goose available, De will be leaving shortly.
86. Styx: "You know what tomorrow is?"
Spider: "Is it... kissing?"
Styx: "I think it might be!"
88. Spider: "I just can't help myself!"
Styx: "As if I care!"
Styx is the first one to accept all three Flirts.
89. Kaiyah: "So I've been thinking about branching out into rusty melon ballers."
Spider: "Why mess with a good thing?"
Kaiyah: "You may have a point."
90. Spider: "Your puppet skin feels awesome."
Kaiyah: "You can touch aaallllll you want, gorgeous."
It must be a bolt thing--Styx and Kaiyah have three with Spider Jerusalem, compared to Kendra and De's two, and both Styx
and Kaiyah accepted the Caress, where Kendra and De didn't.
91. Oh, I've been waiting for this look through all these flirts.
92. Spider: "It's a shame you changed out of your swimsuit."
Kaiyah: "Isn't it?"
93. "It's noon. Can I sleep now?"
Yup, noon brings a peek at Spider Jerusalem's relationship panel. He's still rocking a Double-Crush with all four contestants,
he's friends--but not best friends--with all of them, and the bolts haven't changed. But one SimSelf is pulling away from the
rest, and two are tied for second place eight points back. So who stays and who goes?
94. Kaiyah (151): "It's Day 4 and I'm still in the lead! Rusty forks for the win!"
Kendra (143): "Two days without being in the hot tub, and I'm still in the race!"
Styx (143): "What can I say? I learned from my Day 1 mistakes!"
It's still anyone's game going into Day 5. Except, of course, for our last contestant...
95. "No Spider Jerusalem babies?"
Sorry, De. No Spider Jerusalem babies.
De's out on Day 4 with a score of 129--barely higher than her Day 3 score, despite the hot tubbing. You head out; I'll wrangle
the crazy kids over at the observation post into some semblance of order.
96. This completely pointless slide has been brought to you by naptime.
We hope you have enjoyed this completely pointless slide.
97. SimNerd: "Uh, Cass...?"
Cassidy: "Yeah?"
SimNerd: "...Never mind."
Stacilee: "He's not wearing pants, is he?"
SimNerd: "Not as such, no."
Stacilee: "Gilbert's still floating around somewhere, isn't he?"
SimNerd: "With a three-bolt chemistry and maxmotives, he may never leave. Sort of like Spider Jerusalem, only with
underpants."
Cassidy: "Has anyone got a problem with that?"
Stacilee: "Nope."
98. Di: "Shouldn't we be talking to De now?"
Larch: "Shouldn't we be cuddling now?"
Di: "That would be highly inappropriate. I doubt your fiancee would approve."
Larch: "Eh, what she doesn't know..."
Di: "...she'll find out on Boolprop."
Larch: "An excellent point. I'll just stay over here, shall I?"
Di: "That would be best."
100. "I had a pretty good run, didn't I? I mean, even I was surprised when I made it to Day 3 in the middle of the pack! I went from
'almost eliminated' to 'final four,' so I can't complain too much! Except, you know, for the lack of Spider Jerusalem babies.
And, hey, if it was my lack of three-bolt chemistry Flirt-acceptance that doomed me today, we might see Kendra going out
tomorrow--she's the only two-bolter left!"
101. Stacilee: "That's a pretty good point--is it going to come down to bolts, or will something happen like an autonomous Flirt in
front of someone else to shake up the standings?"
SimNerd: "Isn't that supposed to be part of the fun?"
Stacilee: "Yes, but we've gotten this far in without seeing any fighting, and surely we can't get all the way through without
Spider Jerusalem unloading on anyone!"
SimNerd: "Hey, we got to watch Michelle go postal on Big."
Stacilee: "You are quite generous with your consolation prizes."
SimNerd: "Speaking of..."
105. "Hey! I don't get to have a wedding, I don't get to beat anyone up, I don't get to be all gropey with Di... How come I don't get
to have any fun?"
We get it; you're Eeevil. Now shut up and look hot.
106. De: "Do you have anything to say in your defense?"
Big: "I'm rich, shallow, and conceited. How else am I expected to behave?"
De: "You're really not helping your case here."
Big: "What're you going to do? Beat me up? Oooh, I'm soooo scared to be beaten up again. Just try not to throw me through
the stereo this time; that really messes up the hair."
107. De: "Rodney's Death Creator?"
Rodney's Death Creator.
Big: "Who's what now?"
108. "Oh, look! That cloud looks just like a falling satellite!"
111. "Oh no. Whatever will I do. That large hunk of smoking metal has squashed that poor man flat. Someone really should plead
with the Reaper.
"...Look at the time, my soaps are on!"
112. "Throw your hands in the air like you just don't care! And by that I mean, care that Mr. Big Jerkwad's dead!"
Don't let her Family Sim baby-obsession fool you, folks, De is stone cold. I did not make her do this. Grimmy's outside next to
the smoking heap, and she's inside getting her groove on.
Clearly she hasn't seen the bonus gift...
113. "Yeah, hey, totally meant to plead and stuff, but you know how it is when you've got that Dancing Fever... How much? Well,
I've got this wad of gum stuck to the bottom of my shoe with a penny in it..."
115. "I smell bad and I want a grilled cheese sandwich."
Is this the first-ever Grilled Cheese Zombie Mr. Big? If it's not, don't tell me. I wanna be a trendsetter.
117. "Next time, we're on to Day 5! Will Kaiyah continue to pull away from the rest of the pack, as a fellow Knowledge Sim with
three-bolt chemistry? Will three-bolter Styx score higher than Kendra to send the one-time leader packing? Will Kendra prove
once and for all that there's more to winning than three bolts? What will the consolation prize for tomorrow's eliminee be? Will
Spider Jerusalem and Gilbert ever leave the observation post? Will we ever see Cassidy in pants again?
"Tune in for the answers to these questions, plus more hot-tubbing goodness, groping, and kissing during Day 5 of the
Spider Jerusalem Bachelor Challenge!
"...Larch, I'll thank you to stay on your own cushion!"
118. OK, I got tired of the polo shirt and the blonde eyebrows.
I think I just made Gilbert kinda hot.