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The Story of Gin, Spider Jerusalem, and Gilbert Jacquet
1. "So, right... DrSupremeNerd here with a completely non-canonical but entirely hilarious story featuring Gilbert
Jacquet, Bluewater Village's favorite Mama's Boy, Spider Jerusalem Vetinari, the Reaper Child son of
Cypress, the villain of the Vetinari Dualegacy (available on DrSupremeNerd's Simpage), and GintasticNecat,
the writer of The Science of a Legacy.
"This is an old account I'd forgotten the password of, but I remembered it and decided to post this here so as
not to create confusion with my Legacy.
"Basically, Gin's raising Spider's youngest half-brother, so I had her invite Spider over so he could bond with
Billy. The following ensued, completely autonomously...
"Oh, and... sorry, Gin..."
2. This is Billy all grown up. He looks like a big-eyed, black-haired, green version of Cypress.
Did I mention they have one of the Uglacy puppies? Morgan was too dumb to take care of himself and I didn't
want to lose all of the puppies, so I gave him up and had Gin adopt him. He was too tired to eat and too
hungry to sleep. So Gin and Billy now own a Chowdale!
3. "Do you like hitting things with other things?"
"I have one nice point--heck yeah!"
"One nice point? Who has one nice point?"
"Me, Dad, Uncle Larch... lots of people, really."
"Gee whiz!"
Billy got eight nice points from nowhere. He's the nicest one in the whole extended family.
Spider decided to bring a friend along. Why he picked Gilbert Jacquet, I will never know, because they've only
talked a few times online.
5. But what's this? Gin also thinks Gilbert is quite the hottie!
And possibly Gilbert also thinks Spider Jerusalem is smoking? Maybe Gilbert has been spending too much
time at SupremeNerd's House of Stuff with my Crazy Gay Huggy Servo.
6. Spider: "I have one nice point! Do not try to Admire me!"
Gilbert: "But I have lots of nice points! I Admire everyone!"
Spider has become Crazy Bathroom Stalker! I had Gin Call Over Spider so that Gilbert could get out of the
bathroom.
7. Gilbert followed Spider out and poked him.
I would like to point out that all of the following slides are shots of DIFFERENT incidents.
8. Spider pokes back, because he is mean.
Gin: "It's like they're fighting over me!"
9. "Oh, Spider, it's so manly when you poke Gilbert."
Totally autonomous. Bet you're wishing I had ACR right about now, huh, Gin?
13. Gin: "I get to kiss Spider Jerusalem! All the other SimSelves are going to be sooo jealous!"
14. Gilbert: Poke poke poke!
Spider: I just got kissed!
Gin: Gilbert is hot!
People whose SimSelf is on the Exchange shouldn't make fun of other peoples' SimSelves having
inappropriate heart-farts, is all I'm sayin'. I kid, I kid.
47. Oooh, but the slap was too much for Spider Jerusalem, who's never been slapped before.
Dude, you have ONE NICE POINT! Your Uncle Larch wouldn't have cried!
49. Spider: "I smell bad and I'm leaving, but I stayed longer than Gilbert. Win!"
Gin: "But don't go, I have crunchy black food!"
Spider: "I can get that in the dorm, thanks. When Billy wakes up, tell him I said Bye."
Gin: "Come back any time! I have enough Aspiration Points for a Love Tub!"
50. "And that is the story of Gin, Spider Jerusalem, and Gilbert Jacquet.
"Have I mentioned how much I love my mean Sims? Like, seriously, if Gin hadn't lit the kitchen on fire, Spider
would have followed in Larch's footsteps and autonomously made an enemy!
"And NO, Gin, you may not WooHoo Spider Jerusalem."