Ingles prohibido

EL INGLES PROHIBIDO
GLENN DARRAGH

E D I T O R I A L
S T A N L E Y

EL INGLES PROHIBIDO

WRITTEN BY
GLENN DARRAGH

PUBLISHED BY
EDITORIAL STANLEY

LAYOUT
ANGELA G6MEZ MARTIN

COVER DESIGN
DISENO IRUNES

© EDITORIAL STANLEY
APDO. 207 - 20302 IRUN - SPAIN
TELF. (943) 64 04 12 - FAX. (943) 64 38 63

ISBN: 84-7873-349-3
DEP. LEG. BI-354-01

FIRST EDITION 2001

PRINTERS
IMPRENTA BEREKINTZA

ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

Examples of usage were drawn from newspapers and magazines as indicated in the text of the
book, as well as from the following printed sources: Albee, Edward: Who's Afraid of Virginia
Woolf?; Amis, Kingsley:The Green Man, The Old Devils', Amis, Martin: Money, London Fields;
Barnes, Julian: Talking it Over; Beckett, Samuel: Molloy; Bender, Aimee: The Girl in the
Flammable Skirt; Bennet, William: The Falkland Line; Beretta, Alan: What's Your Game?;
Bergreen, Laurence: Louis Armstrong, An Extravagant Life; Bruce, Lenny: The Essential Lenny
Bruce; Bukowski, Charles: Post Office, Factotum, Women, Love is a Dog from Hell; Carlin, Tony:
One More Hand; Carrol, James: An American Requiem; Century, Douglas: Street Kingdom;
Chandler, Raymond: Farewell, My Lovely; Chanteau, Diane: The Longest Sausage In The World;
Chapman, Robert L.: American Slang; Cleese, John: Fawlty Towers; Coe, Jonathan: The House
of Sleep; Coen, Ethan: Gates of Eden; Cole, Lew: 12465 Kimberland Ave.; Cook, Peter: Beyond
the Fringe; Cornfield, Robert: The Tree Still Grows in Brooklyn; Corsitto, Christopher: Next
Door To Erica; Doughty, W.C.: Charabia Deserta; Edin, Kathryn: Making Ends Meet; Ellroy,
James: L.A.Confidential; Fielding, Helen: Bridget Jones's Diary; Garrigan, Bert: Where Sympathy
is Found; Gordon, Neil: The Gun Runner's Daughter; Greene, Graham: The End of the Affair;
Hall, Willis: The Long and the Short and the Tall; Herlihy, James Leo: Midnight Cowboy; Herron,
Shaun: The Whore-Mother; Irving, John: The World According to Garp; Jong, Erica: Any Woman's
Blues; Jonson, Gregory: Mountain Male; Keaton, Norman: Falling Off A Ladder; Laffan, James:
Up and Down the Lisburn Road; Larkin, Philip: Collected Poems, Selected Letters; Lawrence,
D.H.: Lady Chatterley's Lover; Logan, Roy: Working it Out With a Pencil; Lukowiak, Ken: A
Soldier's Song; Mairs, David: Top Drawers; Mamet, David: American Buffalo, Sexual Perversity
in Chicago, Duck Variations, Glengarry Glen Ross; Marcus, Tom: River Deep; McCabe, Frank:
McCabe at the Movies; McCourt, Malachy: A Monk Swimming; McGrath, John: Events While
Guarding the Bofors Gun; McPhee, Nancy: The Book of Insults; Miller, Henry: Tropic of Cancer;
Newman, G.F.: Law & Order; Nichols, Peter: Privates on Parade; Obst, David: Too Good To Be
Forgotten; Ogilby, John: Twat and Twaddle; Oldfield, Gabriella T.: Tom and Verna; Orton, Joe
(ed. Lahr, John): The Orton Diaries; Osworth, Barry: Upside Down; Palahniuk, Chuck: Fight
Club; Paretsky, Sarah: Ghost Country; Price, Richard: Three Screenplays, dockers; Rabe, Da-
vid: Streamers; Rosen, Charley: Barney Polan's Game; Roth, Philip: Portnoy's Complaint;
Schrader, Paul: Taxi Driver; Sounes, Howard: Locked in the Arms of a Crazy Life; Stone, Robert:
Dog Soldiers; Styron, William: Sophie's Choice; Takari, Ronald: A Larger Memory; Tarantino,
Quentin: Reservoir Dogs; Thomas, Philip: Rathmines Rag; Vonnegut Jr., Kurt: Mother Night,
Slaughterhouse 5, Breakfast of Champions; Wain, John: Life at the Top; Wambaugh, Joseph: The
Choirboys, The Glitter Dome, Echoes in the Darkness; Waugh, Evelyn: Officers and Gentlemen;
Whitehead, E. A.: Old Flames, Mecca, The Foursome, Alpha Beta, The Sea Anchor; Wilson, August:
Ma Rainey's Black Bottom; Wilson, Robert McLiam: Eureka Street. Hank Hyena, Garrison Keillor,
Susie Bright and Courtney Weaver are columnists for Salon.

Illustrative sentences were also taken from the following films: American Beauty: Alan Ball;
Animal House: Douglas Kenney, Chris Miller, Harold Ramis; As Good As It Gets: James L.
Brooks; Austin Powers: Mike Meyers; Barton Fink: Joel and Ethan Coen; Beautiful Girls: Scott
Rosenberg; Blazing Saddles: Mel Brooks and Andrew Bergman; Bound: Larry and Andy
Wachowski Bull Durham: Ron Shelton; Casino: Nicholas Pileggi and Martin Scorsese; Chasing
Amy: Kevin Smith; Clerks: Kevin Smith; Cruel Intentions: Roger Kumble; Deconstructing Harry:
Woody Allen; Desperados: Robert Rodriguez; Donnie Brasco: Screenplay by Paul Attanasio
from the book by Joseph D. Pistone and Richard Woodley; Fargo: Joel and Ethan Coen; Fear and
Loathing in Las Vegas: Screenplay by Terry Gilliam, Tony Grisoni, Tod Davies and Alex Cox
from the book by Hunter S. Thompson; Fisher King, The: Richard LaGravenese; Fried Green
Tomatoes: Fannie Flagg and Carol Sobieski; Full Metal Jacket: Gustave Hasford, Michael Herr
and Stanley Kubrick from the novel 'The Short Timers' by Gustav Hasford; Gattaca: Andrew M.
Niccol; Get Shorty: Screenplay by Scott Frank, based on the novel by Elmore Leonard; Glengarry
Glen Ross: David Mamet; Go: John August; Godfather, The: Mario Puzo and Francis Ford Coppola
from the novel by Mario Puzo; Good Will Hunting: Matt Damon and Ben Affleck; Goodfellas:
Nicholas Pileggi and Martin Scorsese; Grand Canyon: Lawrence Kasdan and Meg Kasdan; Green
Mile, The: Screenplay by Frank Darabont from the novel by Stephen King; Happiness: Todd
Solondz; Jackie Brown: Screenplay by Quentin Tarantino, based on the novel by Elmore Leonard;
L.A. Confidential: Screenplay by Brian Helgeland from the novel by James Ellroy; Leaving Las
Vegas: Screenplay by Mike Figgis from the novel by John O'Brien; Lost Highway: David Lynch;
My Cousin Vinny: Dale Launer; Night on Earth: Jim Jarmusch; One Flew Over the Cuckoo's
Nest: Bo Goldman and Lawrence Hauben from the novel by Ken Kesey; Patton: Francis Ford
Coppola and Edmund H. North; Primal Fear: Ann Biderman and Steve Shagan from the novel by
William Diehl; Pulp Fiction: Quentin Tarantino and Roger Roberts Avery; Pump Up The Volume:
Allan Moyle; Ref, The: Richard LaGravenese and Marie Weiss; Reservoir Dogs: Quentin Tarantino;
Scent of A Woman: Bo Goldman, from a screenplay by Ruggero Maccari and Dino Risi, from the
novel by Giovanni Arpino; Shawshank Redemption, The: Screenplay by Frank Darabont from the
novella by Stephen King; Smoke: Auster, Paul; Stripes: Len Blum and Daniel Goldberg; Swimming
with Sharks: George Huang; Swingers: Jon Favreau; Taxi Driver: Paul Schrader; The Big
Lebrowski: Joel and Ethan Coen; The Commitments: Dick Clement, Roddy Doyle, Ian La Frenais
from the novel by Roddy Doyle; Trainspotting: Screenplay by John Hodge based on the novel by
Irvine Welsh; Unforgiven: David Webb Peoples; Very Bad Things: Peter Berg; Wag The Dog:
David Mamet; Wild At Heart: David Lynch, based on the book by Barry Gifford.

CONTENTS

1: PARTS OF THE BODY 4: SEXUAL ACTIVITY
1. A ARSE / ASS -CULO 1 4. A GROPE -MAGREAR 36

1. B ARSEHOLE, ASSHOLE -ANO 2 4. B FUCK -JODER, FOLLAR ... 37

1. C COCK -POLLA, VERGA 3 4. C NOOKY, NOOKIE -POLVOS 39

1. D BALLS -HUEVOS, PELOTAS, COJONES 5 4. D GANGBANG -VIOLACION COLECTIVA,

1. E CUNT -CONO, CHOCHO 5 SEXO TRIBAL 40

1. F CLIT -CLITORIS 7 4. E GO DOWN ON SOMEONE -CHUPAR, MAMAR 41

1. G PUBES -VELLO PUBICO 7 4. F RUBBER -CONDON, GOMA, GLOBO 43

1. H PRIVATE PARTS -PARTES PUDENDAS 8 4. G JERK OFF -HACERSE UNA PAJA, PELARSELA . 43

1. I TITS -TETAS 8 4. H CHERRY -VIRGINIDAD 45

EXERCISE 10 4. I BUGGER -SODOMIZAR, SODOMITA 45
EXERCISE 47

2: BODY FUNCTIONS
1. A PISS -MEAR, MEADA 12
5: SEXUAL TASTES
2. B SHIT, SHITE -CAGAR, MIERDA 13 5. A HOMO -MARICA, MARICON 50

2. C FART -PEDO 14 5. B DYKE, DIKE -MARIMACHO 52

2. D THE SHITS -LA CAGALERA 15 5. C COTTAGE -LAVABO PUBLICO PARA CITAS

2. E SHIT-HOUSE, SHITE-HOUSE -RETRETE, HOMOSEXUALES 53

CAGADERO 15 5. D AMBISEXTROUS -BISEXUAL 53

2. F BUMF -PAPEL HIGIENICO 16 5. E DRAG QUEEN -TRAVESTI 54

2. G PUKE -VOMITAR, VOMITONA 17 5. F KINKY -PERVERTIDO 55

2. H GOB -ESCUPIR, ESCUPITAJO 18 5. G PRO -PUTA 56

2. I SNOT -MOCOS 18 5. H TRICK -PUTERO, PUTANERO 57

2. J COME, CUM -LECHE, SEMEN 19 5. I WHOREHOUSE -BURDEL, CASA DE PUTAS . . 57

2. K THE RAG -LA REGLA, EL PERIODO, 5. J PIMP -CHULO 58

COMPRESA 20
EXERCISE 21 6: UNPLEASANT PEOPLE,
3: SEXUAL DESIRE THINGS, PLACES, ETC.
6. A BASTARD -CABR6N, HIJO PUTA 61
3. A THE HOTS -DESEO 24
6. B ARSELICKER -LAMECULOS 64
3. B HORNY -CALIENTE, CACHONDO 24
6. C BITCH -ZORRA, LAGARTA 65
3. C CHAT UP -LIGAR, ENRROLLARSE CON 25
6. D BUMMER -CONAZO, LATAZO 66
6. E CLAP -GONORREA 67
3. D FOOL AROUND -TENER ENREDOS 26
6. F CRUD -PORQUERIA 68
3. E STUD -SEMENTAL 28
6. G CRUDDY -ASQUEROSO 69
3. F HARD-ON -ERECCI6N 28
6. H ARSEHOLE OF THE EARTH, ETC
3. G BABE -BOMBON, NINFA 29
-EL CULO DEL MUNDO 70
3. H A PIECE OF ASS -UN POLVO 30
6. I IT SUCKS -ES UNA MIERDA 71
3. I COCKTEASER -CALIENTAPOLLAS 32
EXERCISE 6.1 72
3. J WET DREAM -SUENO HUMEDO 32
EXERCISE 34

7: INCOMPETENCE, INFERIOR 10: IDIOMATIC USAGES
QUALITY 10. A EXPRESSIONS WITH "FUCK" 105
10. B EXPRESSIONS WITH "SHIT" 107
7. A FUCK UP -CAGAR, CAGADA, CAPULLO .... 74
10. c EXPRESSIONS WITH "ASS", "ARSE" . . . . 109
7. B FUCK ABOUT (AROUND) -PERDER EL
10. D EXPRESSIONS WITH "BALLS" "BALLOCKS" 110
T1EMPO, JODER 74
10. E EXPRESSIONS WITH "HELL" 1ll
7. C SNAFU -METEDURA DE PATA, CAGADA .... 76
10. F EXPRESSIONS WITH "BITCH" 1ll
7. D HALF-ARSED, HALF-ASSED -MUY POCO
10. G EXPRESSIONS WITH "BUGGER" 112
BRILLANTE 77
10. H EXPRESSIONS WITH "PISS" 112
7. E SHITTY -DE MIERDA 77
10. I EXPRESSIONS WITH "TITS" 113
7. F BULLSHIT -SANDECES, GILIPOLLECES .... 78
10. J EXPRESSIONS WITH "FINGER" 113
EXERCISE 81
10. K EXPRESSIONS WITH "FART" 113
10. L EXPRESSIONS WITH "PUSSY" 114
8: EMPHASIS 10. M EXPRESSIONS WITH "UP" 114
8. A FUCK - A LA MIERDA! 83 10. N EXPRESSIONS WITH "GET" 114
8. B FUCKING -DE MIERDA, PVNETERO 84 EXERCISE 115
8. C FUCKING WELL - CONO!CARAJO! 85
117
8. D A HELL OF A -SENSACIONAL, DE PADRE KEY To ExERCISES
Y SENOR MIO 86 INDEXOFTERMS 125

8. E AS HELL -SUMAMENTE 86
8. F FOR FUCK'S SAKE - PUTA MADRE!
CARAJO! 87
8. G THE FUCK -CONO, CARAJO 88
8. H THE SHIT OUT OF... -SEVERAMENTE 88
EXERCISE 90

9: RACIAL INSULTS
9. A WHITEY - EL HOMBREBLANCO! 92
9. B BRIT -BRITANICO 92
9. C MICK -IRLANDES 93
9. D YANK, YANKEE -YANQUI, GIRI 94
9. E FROG -FRANCHUTE, GABACHO 94
9. F KRAUT -ALEMAN 95
9. G KIKE -JUDIO 96
9. H POLACK -POLACO 97
9. I RUSSKIE -RUSO 97
9. J RAGHEAD -ARABE 97
9. K WOP -ITAL1ANO 98
9. L DAGO -ESPANOL, SUDACA 99
9. M GOOK -ASlATICO, CHINO, AMARILO 99
9. N NIGGER -NEGRO 100
9. O AUSSIE -AUSTRALIANO 102
EXERCISE 103

INTRODUCTION

The aim of this book is to teach what is still commonly known as 'bad language'.
Depending on the degree to which it is tolerated, it is also described as strong, foul,
picturesque, earthy, rough, salty, colourful, naughty, profane, adult, taboo, vulgar, dirty,
filthy, low, obscene, and much else besides. Whatever the adjective, the language in
question consists of a relatively small group of words and expressions that are never
taught in school, not even in language schools to adult students of English. In that sense,
it constitutes a kind of forbidden language or counter-language within the main body of
English. Why this language is not taught in the usual way is simple to explain: it
embarrasses, upsets, insults or otherwise offends a great many people. Of course, every
native speaker of English who is more than five years old knows the main swearwords of
the language. But most people, most of the time, still prefer not to use them. For this
reason alone, second-language learners of English are probably well advised not to use
them either, or at least not until they have become sensitive to the effects they are likely
to produce.

If that is so, why study a book like this at all? In a word: to understand. In the past thirty
years, language and cultural values have changed considerably. It is little short of
astonishing, given the liberality of language in present-day films, that the first recorded
use of the word 'fuck' in a major commercial movie occurred only in 1970, in Robert
Altman's M*A*S*H. Since then, especially in the last decade, Hollywood has discovered
that bad language is good box office. On television, too, in Britain and also in the United
States outside the expletive-free national networks, swearing is now commonplace and
uncontroversial. The same is true of the printed word. Not only in books but in national
newspapers and magazines, words now frequently appear which only a generation or
two ago would have earned their authors a mouthful of soap. Everywhere, the electronic
bleeps and the blanks and asterisks which formerly protected the innocent have been put
on the shelf. Some speculate that within ten or fifteen years, the dreaded f-word itself
will be wholly acceptable, even for children.

It would not be the first time some illicit term were to gain respectability. The expression
'it sucks', used to refer to things of inferior quality, originally had direct connotations
of oral sex. The noun 'snafu', meaning a bungled or confused situation, began as
military slang, an acronym for 'situation normal, all fucked up'. The word 'gay', now
the usual term for a homosexual, was originally American tramps' slang for the homo-
sexual companion of an older vagrant. Many such words have migrated, at least partly,
towards standard English in recent years. As films, television, books, magazines and
the Internet propagate the once-censored vocabulary, the trend is likely to continue. In
the meantime, however, students of English as a foreign language now more than ever
need some kind of guide to this blossoming branch of the language.

The present book, designed for students who have already attained a good level of
general English, may be used as both a reference guide and an instruction manual.
Each chapter deals with a particular aspect of taboo language. Chapter 1, for example,
lists basic slang words, all considered vulgar, for intimate parts of the body: arse,
arsehole, cock, balls, cunt, clit, tits, etc. A separate section within each chapter is
devoted to each of these basic terms, with numerous examples of usage drawn from a
wide range of contemporary sources, principally films and novels, but also plays,
diaries, letters, newspapers, magazines, and so on. Each section also lists synonyms
for these basic words or other terms related to them, again with numerous examples.
Thus, in Chapter 1, section l.c deals with 'cock', giving seventeen common synonyms.
When words or expressions are used mainly or exclusively in a particular part of the
English-speaking world, then this is indicated in brackets, as follows:

dong (US) • I was wholly incapable of keeping my paws from my dong once
it started to climb up my belly. (Philip Roth)

When there is no such annotation, the word is used or understood by English-speakers
everywhere. Where examples are drawn from printed sources, the name of the author
or journal is shown in brackets after the quotation. If, as is frequently the case, the
source is a film, then the title of the film is shown italicised and in brackets after the
quotation, thus:

dick • I would suck your dad's big fat dick, and then I would fuck him till
his eyes rolled back in his head! (American Beauty)

An answer key to the exercises is provided at the end of the book, along with an index
to all the words and expressions listed and exemplified in the text.

Finally, it is worth repeating the warning given above. Most of the words and phrases
presented in this book are offensive to someone. A small number of inoffensive and
euphemistic terms have crept into the text when their presence seemed justified by
considerations of completeness, and such terms are signalled when they occur. But the
vast majority are offensive (particularly the racist terms dealt with in Chapter 9). If, as
the examples prove, you can scarcely hope to understand much of modern culture without
a basic knowledge of 'bad language', you still ought not to use it in front of children,
mothers, maiden aunts, clergymen, policemen, judges, or other sensitive souls. Not
even when they are using it in front of you.

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1. PARTS OF THE BODY
1. a arse / ass -culo
An Old English word, arse is mainly British while ass is mainly American. Similarly with derivative
words: arsehole, arselicker, etc. are British, while asshole, ass-kisser, etc. are American. Exceptions
do occur, however. For example, at the start of the Gulf War in 1991, no less an American than George
Bush, then President, declared: 'Saddam is going to get his arse kicked'.

• What she reminds me of is those girls you • Me recuerda a una de esas chicas que se ven
see prancing up and down the King's Road in por King's Road en vaqueros desgastados me-
faded jeans with tight little arses and bobbing neando sus culitos prietos y tetas balan-
tits. (E.A. Whitehead) ceantes.
• The slut got up and started to play pinball, • La putilla se levanto y se puso a jugar al
wiggling her ass to help the balls move around. pinball, meneando el culo para acompanar
(Charles Bukowski) elmovimiento de las bolas.
» He suffered —did he suffer!— from constipa- • Sufria — Vaya si sufria! — de estreftimien-
tion... my father reading the evening paper with to... mi padre leyendo el periodico vespertino
a suppository up his ass. (Philip Roth) con un supositorio en el culo.
• The truth is that I've had a long-standing • La verdad es que he tenido un problema des-
problem with heroin addiction. I've been de hace mucho con la heroina. He tenido
known to sniff it, smoke it, swallow it, stick it ocasion de esnifarla, tragarla, metermela por
up my arse and inject it into my veins. el culo e inyectaimela por las venas.
(Trainspotting')
• Her ass was still shapely as were her legs • Su culo todavia mantenia una buena Imea,
and she had a seductive wiggle when she igual que sus piernas, y cuando andaba tenia
walked. (Charles Bukowski) un contoneo de lo mas seductor.

SYNONYMS: It was just a friendly little pat me bum. (John McGrath)
on the behind. (David Mairs) buns (US) From the hemi-
backside • They sat around on • These rich cunts... whenever spherical shape of the buttocks.
their backsides day after day, they want to lower their soft • OK, guys, hustle your buns —
drinking tea and doing nothing, behinds, there's always a chair we've got a lot of work to do.
except complaining, of course. s t a n d i n g ready for them. (Christopher Corsitto) • I was
(Norman Keaton) • I've got (Henry Miller) given a cat-o'-nine-tails and
frost-bite. The ten fingers of my bottom Euphemistic. • — You asked if I wanted to participate.
hands, the ten toes of my feet, know, you've got a lovely bottom. A man's buttocks were bared be-
and the two cheeks of my back- — Oh, you've noticed? — Only fore me — a young man, young
side. If I stay out there one it takes up half the mattress. (E.A. and handsome, with firm buns
minute longer, I'll have a frost- Whitehead) — and I began to flog him.
bitten cock. (John McGrath) bum (UK) • .—'Where shall I (Erica Jong)
beam Especially used to refer sit'? — 'Sit on your bum, mate. butt (US) From buttocks. • She
to the width of the hips and but- That's what I would do'. (Tom slipped on the ice and fell hard
tocks. • She's a nice-looking Marcus) • Have no fear, I am not on her butt. (Daniel Ogg) • Can
woman. A bit broad across the dead: I've bumped my bum and any of us honestly say we have
beam, it's true, but a nice looker I've hurt my head. How's that? not wondered what our ancestors
just the same. (James Laffan) (John McGrath) • Give me time. wiped their butts with in the ab-
behind Euphemistic. • What do Give me time. You bastards sence of toilet paper? (Salon)
you mean 'sexual harassment'? won't give me time to scratch • Can your marriage survive
EDITORIAL STANLEY El Ingles Prohibido 1

when you can't stand the sight fanny (US) Relatively inoffen- khyber, Khyber Pass (UK)
of his ever-widening butt laying sive in the US, but taboo in the Rhyming slang of pass and ass
on the couch? (Salon) • Women UK, where it has a different or arse. • He needs a good kick
are cursed with big butt phobia. meaning. See l.e below. • I hate up the khyber is what he needs.
(Salon) using an outside john. In sum- (Alan Beretta)
can (US) • It was a bad case of mer the flies are swarming all rear Euphemistic. • And if the
haemorrhoids. He could hardly over you, in winter you freeze kiddies misbehave, don't be
sit down, his can was hurting your fanny off. (Gregory Jonson) afraid to give them a slap on the
him so much. (James Laffan) • Was it nature or nurture that rear. (Daily Mirror)
• Monica Lewinsky seduced the sent me, from an early age, tail (US) Often used in figura-
most powerful man in the world into fits at the sight of the tive phrases like work one's tail
with a flash of her thong-clad word 'toilet', or had me roll- off, run one's tail off. • Don't
can. Why is this unmentionable ing on the floor at the thought you understand? If you don't do
garment so sexy? (Salon) that a girl could be named it, they're going to toss you out
cheeks Used especially to refer 'Fanny'? Half of my relatives on your tail. (Lew Cole) • This
to the two halves of the buttocks. do not think bathroom humor is the first time you've had your
• She started cleaning at the sink. is funny. (Salon) tail out of that kitchen since we
As she bent over ... I saw two keister (US) • So much confi- got here. (William Faulkner) • I
cheeks. Two cheeks. Mama mia! dential information was being walked out, the old car started
An ass from out of this world. leaked to the press that President and soon I was back in bed with
With tiny white panties, riding Ronald Reagan finally lost pa- Betty. I pushed up against her
up a little so you could see one tience. 'I've had it up to my warm tail and was asleep in 45
whole cheek. The other was keister with these leaks,' he de- seconds. (Charles Bukowski)
partly covered. (Night on Earth) clared. (Newsweek)

1. b arsehole, asshole -ano
• What's wrong with assholes, baby? You've • Que tienen de malo los anos, nena? Tu tie-
got an asshole, I've got an asshole... The world nes un ano, yo tengo un ano!... El mundo esta
is full of billions of assholes, the President repleto de millones de anos. El presidente tie-
has an asshole, the carwash boy has an ne un ano, el lavacoches tiene un ano, el juez
asshole, the judge and the murderer have y el asesino tienen anos.
assholes. (Charles Bukowski)
• There were thousands upon thousands of • Habia miles y miles de personas que com-
people who bought bad chemicals and ate praban sustancias quimicas nocivas y se las
them or sniffed them or injected them into their comian o las esnifaban o se las inyectaban en
veins... Sometimes they even stuffed bad las venas... A veces, incluso se metian las
chemicals up their assholes. (Kurt Vonnegut Jr.) sustancias quimicas nocivas por el agujero
del culo.
* Around the toilet seat was a band of paper... • Alrededor del retrete habia una banda de pa-
This loop of paper guaranteed Dwayne that pel... Aquella banda de papel le garantizaba a
he need have no fear that corkscrew-shaped Dwayne que no tenia por que temer que ningiun
little animals would crawl up his asshole and bichito con forma de sacacorchos fuera a
eat up his wiring. (Kurt Vonnegut Jr.) metersele por el culo y a comerle sus cables.
* I wouldn't go near that pool if you paid me • Yo no me acercaria a esa piscina ni aunque
— it is a breeding ground for polio and spinal me pagaran; es un caldo de cultivo de la polio
meningitis, not to mention diseases of the skin, y la meningitis espinal, por no hablar de las
the scalp, and the asshole. (Philip Roth) enfermedades de la piel, el cuero cabelludo y
el ano.

2 El Ingles Prohibido EDITORIAL STANLEY

SYNONYMS: Bend over and show me that
round brown. I gotta see if
round brown • Turn around and you're hiding a machine gun in
bend over and spread your cheeks, there. (Joseph Wambaugh) •••

1. c cock -polla, verga

* My husband had this big cock and that's all • Mi marido tenia una polla enorme, pero era
he had. He had no personality. Just a big cock, lo unico que tenia. No tenia personalidad. Solo
and he thought that was all he needed. (Char- una enorme polla y pensaba que era lo unico
les Bukowski) que habia que tener.
* She had my cock in her hand, playing with • Tenia mi polla en su mano, jugando con ella,
it, rubbing it. (Henry Miller) frotandola.
* She came out with her drink, sat on my lap, • Salio con su copa y se sento en mi regazo,
kissed me, putting her tongue into my mouth. me beso, metiendome la lengua en la boca.
My cock leaped up against her firm bottom. Mi polla se puso como una roca al contacto
I grabbed a handful. Squeezed. (Charles de su firme trasero. Se lo agarre". Aprete".
Bukowski)

SYNONYMS:
All the following terms are taboo. In context, however, some may seem more comical than others.
Some — e.g. peter, Johnson and willy — would be more likely to be used by, and with, children.

chopper • Men who drive cars Dogs) • I do not take short men tool. Or a peter. — I've heard
like that subconsciously believe seriously. If they're my height, Nathan call it his dork. Also, his
they've found an extension of maybe. But I look at a short man putz. (William Styron)
their chopper — sleek, power- and I think Big Ego, Small Dick. dork (US) Perhaps a variant
ful, irresistible. (Gabriella T. Is that so terrible? (Courtney of dirk, a dagger. • He had the
Oldfield) Weaver) • I would suck your great bulging muscles of a
• I know what it's like when dad's big fat dick, and then I body-builder but this strangely
you're young. The pressure to be would fuck him till his eyes contradictory modest little
a big strong man. I went through rolled back in his head! (Ameri- dork. (Gabriella T. Oldfield)
all that. My father thought the can Beauty) .• What strength she has stored
ultimate in masculinity was to dipstick From the dipstick of a in that slender frame — the
stick your chopper into anything car. • He accepted her invitation glorious acrobatics she can
that wore a skirt. (Peter Nichols) with high, alas soon-to-be-dis- perform while dangling from
dick • Hey, listen, I want some- appointed, hopes of soon getting the end of my dork! (Philip
body good — and I mean very his dipstick wet. (Alan Beretta) Roth)
good — to plant that gun. I don't dong (US) • I was wholly inca- John Thomas Arbitrary use of
want my brother coming out of pable of keeping my paws from a male name. • 'John Thomas!
that toilet with just his dick in my dong once it started to climb John Thomas!' she said and she
his hands. (The Godfather) up my belly. (Philip Roth) quickly kissed the soft penis,
• 'Like a Virgin' is all about a • — What do you call it in the that was beginning to stir again.
girl who digs a guy with a big South? — Sometimes we call it (D.H. Lawrence) • If you get any
dick. The whole song is a meta- a pecker. In parts of the upper trouble with them, funny busi-
phor for big dicks. (Reservoir South they call it a dong or a ness in the ablutions, admiring

your John Thomas, any of that, upward, and you put honey all • Schlong: the word somehow
have a word with me. (Peter over his balls and pecker, and catches exactly the brutishness,
Nichols) • Poor old John Thomas you cut off his eyelids so he the meatishness, that I admire
is as limp and as moribund as a has to stare at the sun till he so, the sheer mindless, weighty,
flayed worm. (William Styron) dies. (Kurt Vonnegut Jr.) and unselfconscious dangle of
Johnson Arbitrary use of the peter From the male forename that living piece of hose through
surname Johnson. • Tomorrow and the association with pee, which he passes streams of wa-
vee come back and cut off your urine. • This guy goes to the ter as thick and strong as rope.
chonson... Ja, your viggly penis, doctor. He says, 'Doc, I've got (Philip Roth) • 'I see you're
Lebowski. (The Big Lebowski) this terrible pain in my peter'. checking out my shlong,'
• Vagina. The word itself (Tom Marcus) • Do you suck Wayne says. 'Yep.' 'And...?'
makes some men uncomfort- dicks? Are you a peter-puffer? 'Frankly, I'm underwhelmed.'
able. They don't like hearing (Full Metal Jacket) • No lip- (Erica Jong)
it and find it difficult to say. stick on the glass? Baby, do tool • He allowed me to have the
Whereas without batting an you think you have any lipstick prick between the buttocks,
eye a man will refer to his left on your mouth after three which, as I fucked, he agitated
'dick' or his 'rod' or his or four of those flossy fatcats in a most alarming way. At this
'Johnson'. (The Big Lebowski) from Brentwood with those point I put my hand under him
joint (US) • One of those limp little peters make you and took his medium-to-large
m o t h e r f u c k e r s grabbed me suck your eyes crossed? tool in my hand. (Joe Orton)
when I was Bobby's age. At the (Joseph Wambaugh) wang (US) He was lying on
movies... we're all wondering prick • You need something his back. His ankles were
what this old guy is doing at to make that beautiful ass of crossed. His hands were folded
the cartoons, and he sits down yours gyrate with joy, a big behind his head. His great
at the end of the row, and half- stiff prick rammed into that wang lay across his thigh like
way through he reaches over cunt you've got locked up... a salami. It slumbered now.
and grabs my joint. Reaches (William Styron) • The ad in (Kurt Vonnegut Jr.)
over another guy and grabs me Rolling Stone is certainly eye- whang, whanger (US) • His
by the joint. (David Mamet) catching — the words 'Why right eye was closed, the left
• Hey, Joe. You been kissing Women Love a Small Prick', eye nearly so. He was unaware
Anastasia, you better go swal- appearing opposite a bedroom- of her f o n d l i n g his flaccid
low a drugstore and I ain't kid- eyed model in lingerie. But whanger. (Joseph Wambaugh)
ding. She's copped every joint read the fine print — it's a • — Absence makes the cock
in Albuquerque. (James Leo pitch for a home HIV test, and grow harder. — Stop it with
Herlihy) the prick in question is the your fortune cookie philosophy!
pecker (US) • When he was kind made on a finger to get I got a limber whang. I don't get
asleep, I couldn't restrain my- the blood sample. (Salon) straight I might as well become
self any longer. I carefully putz (US) Yiddish, from Mid- a priest! (Joseph Wambaugh)
peeled back the sheet to peek dle High German putz, orna- • 'Oh, honey!' cried the whore.
at his pecker. (Gabriella T. ments. Properly, the foreskin 'You got balls like an elephant
Oldfield) of a penis after it has been re- and a w h a n g like an ox!'
• All she done was... when she moved, but generally applied (Joseph Wambaugh)
seen he had a teensy little to the penis as a whole. • This willy (UK) Some drunkard was
pecker, she gave a giggle. sex maniac! He simply cannot caterwauling in the street. 'Will
That's all. She didn't know no — will not — control the fires you still love me when I'm old
better. (Unforgiven) • You in his putz, the fevers in his and grey and the tip of my willy
stake a guy out on an anthill brain... (Philip Roth) turns blue?' (James Laffan)
in the desert, see? He's facing schlong, shlong (US) Yiddish.


1. d balls -huevos, pelotas, cojones
• Then I felt something jamming its way into . Entonces senti algo que me hurgaba en la
My -crotch. It moved way up there, I looked entrepierna, iba subiendo hacia arriba. Me
round and there was a German Shepherd, full- volvi y vi un pastor aleman, Wen crecido,
grownt, with his nose half-way up my ass. With con su hocico debajo de mi culo. Con un
one snap of his jaws he could rip off my balls. movimiento de mandibulas me podia arran-
(Charles Bukowski) car las pelotas.
. 'For an ugly old son of a bitch, you've got a * —Para ser un feo hijo de puta tienes mu-
lot of balls,' She said. (Charles Bukowski) chos cojones —-dijo ella.
. Tammie had her head in Bobby's lap and she * Tammie tenia su cabeza en el regazo de
had her hand on his balls and then she moved Bobby y tenia la mano puesta en sus huevos,
it up and grabbed his cock and held his cock, luego la subi6 y agarro su polla, sosteniendo-
and alt the time her eyes looked directly at la, y en todo momento sus ojos me miraban
me. (Charles Bokowski) directamente.

SYNONYMS: cobbler's awls and balls. • Give (Peter Nichols)
him a swift kick in the cobblers, nuts • Lyndon Johnson was cyni-
ballocks From Old English then run like hell. (Alan Beretta) cal about schemes to win the
bealluc, testicle. • He's not par- goolies Apparently derived from hearts and minds of the Vietnam-
ticularly sophisticated. Seems to Hindustani gol, a ball. • They'll ese. His philosophy was: Grab
spend a lot of time publicly do what we want because they them by the nuts, their hearts and
scratching his ballocks. (James don't have any choice. We have minds will follow. (Newsweek)
Laffan) • It was in the 18th cen- them by the goolies and they know • Nigel St Claire didn't know
tury that some of our rude words it. (David Bellis) bowling balls from elephant's
first became so. 'Ballocks', for in- knackers (UK) • The absurdity nuts, for chrissake! (Joseph
stance, was, from the llth cen- of it all struck me like a fist in the Wambaugh)
tury, simply the usual term for knackers. (Philip Larkin) • I may stones Originally in standard use,
'testicles' (the reassuringly Lati- regret him for a while tonight. His but now slang. • As my old un-
nate term that is now acceptable), knackers were superb. (Graham armed combat instructor used to
but somehow, by 1800, became Greene) say: a boot in the stones is worth
improper. (Guardian) marbles • You touch my stuff, two in the teeth any day of the
cobblers (UK) Rhyming slang of you get a boot in your marbles. week. (William Bennet)

* And what about the Irish girl? She was in * Y que me dices de la chica iriandesa? Entra-
and out of her chalet every half hoar with a ba y salia de su chalet cada media hora con
different bloke. She must have a cunt like un tipo diferente, Debia de tener un cono como
Heathrow Airport. (E.A. Whitehead) el aeropuerto de Heathrow.
* O Tania, where now is that warm cunt of • Oh, Tania! Donde estara ahora aquel cali-
yours, those fat, heavy garters, those soft, do cono tuyo, aquellas gruesas y pesadas li-
bulging thighs? There is a bone in my prick gas, aquellos muslos suaves y turgentes?
six inches long, I will ream out every wrinkle Tengo un hueso en la picha de quince centi-
in your cunt, Tania, big with seed. (Henry metros, Voy a alisarte todas las arrugas del
cono. Tania inundandote de esperma.


• Amazing! Astonishing! Still can't get over • Sorprendente! jAsombroso! Todavia no pue-
the fantastic idea that when you are looking des admitir la fantastica idea de que, cuandd
at a girl, you are looking at somebody who is estas mirando a una chica, estas mirando a al-
guaranteed to have on her — a cunt! They all guien que, sin la menor duda, posee... un cono!
have cunts! Right under their dresses! Cunts jTodas tienen cono! jDebajo mismo de sus
— for fucking! (Philip Roth) vestidos! Conos... jpara joder!
• I placed her hand on my cock and then pulled • Puse su mano en mi verga y luego le sub! el
up her nightie. I began to play with her cunt. camison. Empece a jugar con su cono. Se eri-
The clit came out and I touched it gently again gid el clitoris y lo acaricie con ternura, una y
and again. Finally, I mounted. My cock entered otra vez. Finalmente, la monte. Mi verga en-
halfway. It was very tight. (Charles Bukowski) tr6 hasta la mitad. Su cono era muy estrecho.

SYNONYMS: clear as daylight. (Alan Beretta) snatch • Sharon Stone crossed
minge • How d'you fancy a her legs and flashed some snatch
beaver • The expression was touch of Black Velvet? Old — about one tenth of a second's
first used by news photogra- Sylvia now? She's a good sort. worth — and was instantly
phers, who often got to see up Clever too. They reckon she can world-famous. (Frank McCabe)
women's skirts at accidents and smoke a cheroot in her minge. • What word to use? 'Pussy' was
sporting events and from under- (Peter Nichols) on the tip of my tongue. But per-
neath fire escapes and so on. pootie Corruption of pussy. haps he found that offensive.
They needed a code word to yell • She's quite cute, you know. Cunt? No, that was worse.
to other newsmen and friendly Young supple breasts, a tight Snatch? Beaver? Hole? No, no,
policemen and firemen and so firm ass, and an uncharted and no. Plain old vagina? No, he
on, to let them know what could pootie. (Cruel Intentions) wasn't my gynecologist. I
be seen, in case they wanted to pussy (US) Possibly from Old sighed. (Courtney Weaver)
see it. The word was this: 'Bea- Norse puss, meaning a pocket or twat • He would sit in the dark
ver!' (Kurt Vonnegut Jr.) • She pouch. • What are you talking for hours on end remembering
might have been fifteen, but about? You walk out with those her pendulous tits, her steaming
when you get that little red bea- fuckin' creeps and low-lifes and twat. Men are more sentimental
ver right up there in front of degenerates out on the streets than women. (John Ogilby) • A
you... no man alive could resist and you sell your little pussy for man! That was what she craved.
that. (One Flew Over the Cuck- nothing. For some low-life pimp A man with something between
oo's Nest) who stands in the hall? And I'm his legs that could tickle her,
box • She was wearing toreador square? You're the one that's that could make her writhe in ec-
pants so tight you could almost square. (Taxi Driver) stasy, make her grab that bushy
see the crack of her box. (Joseph slit • Oh, thou evil-smelling Slit twat of hers with both hands and
Wambaugh) • The chief looked / But half an inch removed from rub it joyfully, boastfully,
at Mrs Billings spread-eagled on shit! / How can men wallow in proudly, with a sense of connec-
the bed... 'Damn, she's got a thy piss / And call it everlasting tion, a sense of life. (Henry
hairy box!' Chief Lynch whis- bliss? (Robert Burns) • His cock Miller)
tled. (Joseph Wambaugh) was out, large, purple, ugly... • His blue eyes crossed and
fanny (UK) Not the same mean- Martin heard the boys' voices bulged from the meticulous
ing as in the US. See l.a above. saying, 'Look! Look! He's got maddening scrutiny of the
• She had her dress hiked up and that big thing and he's trying to golden twat of his beloved.
she wasn't wearing any knick- stick that big thing into her slit!' (Joseph Wambaugh)
ers. I could see her fanny as (Charles Bukowski)


1. f clit -clitoris
• Now, look, I want to show you something • Atento, quiero ensenarte algo — el clitoris.
— the clit. It's where the feeling is. The clit Es el punto sensible. El clitoris se esconde,
hides, you see, it comes out when it's excited ves?, y sale cuando hay suficiente excitacion.
enough. It's pink and very sensitive. You only Es rosado y muy sensible. Solo has de rozarlo
have to touch it with the tip of your tongue. con la punta de la lengua.
(Charles Bukowski)
• I rubbed a finger along her cunt. Soon it got • Pase un dedo por su cono, pronto se hume-
wet and began to open. I put my finger inside. deci6 y empezo a abrirse. Meti el dedo den-
Then I pulled it out and rubbed the clit. (Char- tro, luego lo saque y frote el clitoris.
les Bukowski)
• I blossomed and Elmore sulked. Less and • Madure y Elmore se puso de mal humor. Cada
less was his tongue felt on my clit or his cock vez con menor frecuencia era sentia su lengua
on my buttocks. (Erica Jong) en mi clitoris o su polla sobre mis nalgas.

SYNONYMS: my Mary Louise's little fun pim-
fun pimple When I take the tip ple, she rises two feet off the bed.
of my tongue and wiggle it against (Reservoir Dogs)

1. g pubes -vello pubico
Not an obscene or even a slang term, pubes has nevertheless acquired taboo connotations, by association
with contexts like those which follow:

• Nick went down and spread Linda's legs. Her • Nick se inclino y abrio las piernas de Lin-
pubes were long and twisted and tangled. da. Los pelos de su cono eran largos, riza-
(John Ogilby) dos y enredados.
• Her pubes were the same colour as the hair • Su vello pubico era del mismo color que el
on her head: red, like fire. (Charles Bukowski) de su cabeza: rojo, como el fuego.
• I wanted for her to put my cock in her cunt, • Espere que la metiera dentro, pero ella si-
but she just kept rubbing. Her pubes began to gui6 frotando. Su vello empez6 a irritarme la
irritate my cock. I pulled away. (James Laffan) polla. Abandon6.

SYNONYMS: blance between the pubic hair and thatch • Arabs don't like women
a fur muff. • Then he tells me he with too much thatch, in fact
bush • It was a bush shot. You buried his head in her muff. they tend to like them clean-
could see the pubic hair but not (Henry Miller) shaven. (W.C. Doughty) • He
the sex parts. (John Irving) • Im- snatch-hair • Know what I did found that Foxy Farrell made
plants, calogen, plastics, capped when I was fifteen? Sent a lock him itch all over — to throw her
teeth, the fat sucked out, the hair of my snatch-hair off in an en- down and bury his face in the
extended, the nose fixed, the bush velope to M a r l o n B r a n d o . burnished thatch of pubic hair
shaved — these are not real wo- Prick d i d n ' t even have the which had been shaved to the
men, alright? (Beautiful Girls) courtesy to acknowledge re- shape of a heart. (Joseph
muff From the alleged resem- ceipt. (Philip Roth) Wambaugh)


1. h private parts -partes pudendas

. 'Look,' I said, once we were out of the store, • —Mira —dije, una vez que salimos de la
'a little shopping advice; when you go off to tienda—, permiteme un consejo: cuando va-
do something so very simple as exchanging yas a hacer algo tan sencillo como cambiar
money for goods, it isn't necessary to flash dinero por una mercancia, no es necesario que
your snatch at everyone this side of the le ensenes el cono a todo el mundo. De acuer-
horizon. Okay?' 'Flash what? Who flashed do? — Ensenar que? Quien ha ensenado
anything?' 'You, Mary Jane! Your supposedly nada? —jTu, Mary Jane! Tus supuestas par-
private parts!' (Philip Roth) tes intimas!

SYNONYMS: burly man. In each instance, he Squad would have called her
is naked but for a computer icon, 'privates'. (Ed McBain)
privates • The most playful a space-age fig leaf, covering his parts Lydia was probably kiss-
variation is Barbara Aselmeier's. privates. (New York Times) ing some son of a bitch right
Her screen boasts a dozen iden- • The dancer wiped the black now, or worse, kissing his parts.
tical snapshots of a bearded, man's glasses on what the Vice (Charles Bukowski)

1. i tits -tetas
• — Do you miss having tits? — To be • — Echas de menos tener tetas? — Para serte
completely frank with you, that is the stupidest completamente sincero, esa es la pregunta mas
question I ever heard. What man in his right estupida que he oido. Que hombre en su sano
mind would want tits? (David Mamet) juicio querria tetas?
• As we kissed I reached down into her blouse. • Mientras nos besabamos me adentre en su
I found a tit and cupped my hand on it and blusa. Encontre una teta y la abarque con mi
rolled it around. She wasn't wearing a bra. mano acariciandola. No llevaba sosten.
(Charles Bukowski)
« He was still sucking Laura's tits, going from • Todavia estaba chupando los pechos de
one to the other. Her nipples were erect. Laura, pasando del uno al otro. Los pezones
(James Laffan) estaban duros.
• I mean, think about it. I have big tits. Is that • Piensatelo. Tengo tetas grandes. i,Es esa la
the only reason he was interested in me? It makes unica raz6n por la que se intereso en mi? Me
me rethink this entire relationship — did I even hace replantearme toda esta relacidn — lle-
know this guy? (Courtney Weaver) gue a conocer a este tipo?
• She was a bit fat. Her tits were very large • Estaba un poco gorda. Sus tetas eran muy
but they sagged a lot. (John Ogilby) grandes, pero le caian flaceidas.
• She was all tits and ass. (Lenny Bruce) • Era todo tetas y culo.
• She was on the bed with only her panties on. • Estaba en la cama solo con las bragas pues-
One hand was covering her eyes. Her tits tas. Tenia un brazo tapandose los ojos. Sus
looked good. (James Laffan) tetas tenian buena pinta.


SYNONYMS: like, Oh, there's a pair of She still has her dick! (Joseph
boobs, I'll go stand next to it. Wambaugh) • I have a feeling all
bazooms (US) From a comic I think I'll go talk to it.' (New modern men are like this. They
mispronunciation of bosom. • It York Times) spout the lines, but then in the
was another case of Bio-Energetic bristols (UK) Rhyming slang of face of some luscious knockers,
Breast Cream for South Beach Bristol City, a football club, and they revert back to little boys
bazooms. (Elmore Leonard) titty. • Her full and shapely who haven't gotten enough of
boobs • Pulling one of her boobs bristols bobbled up and down as that X-rated feeling. How can I
out of her bra, she enquired, she ran. (Alan Beretta) trust any of 'em? (Courtney
'Anyone like a little more jugs Perhaps from the associa- Weaver)
milk.' (Philip Thomas) • I've tion with milk jug. • Her buns melons • If Demi Moore wants
been baby-sitting since I was and jugs filled her bikini to over- to fill her melons up with sili-
ten, I've got almost three thou- flowing. (John Ogilby) con, it's ok. with me, but don't
sand dollars. I was saving it knockers From the notion of expect me to admire them.
for a boob job. But my tits can pendulous breasts knocking to- (New York Times) • Why baby,
wait. (American Beauty) • He gether. • The good news is that I did it all for you. I thought
also recognizes how the pres- Gloria has a pretty nice set of you'd like it sweetheart... Why,
sure to prove his masculinity knockers, all right. And dyna- I thought you'd get all excited...
drove him to objectify girls. 'I mite legs. And she ain't got no sort of heave and pant and come
treated my girlfriends really balls. The bad news is, she ain't running at me, your melons
bad,' he says. 'I admit it. I was had her second operation yet. bobbling. (Edward Albee)


EXERCISE 1.1

In each of the following lists, all the words are synonymous except one. Spot the odd man out and
explain why the word in question is misplaced.
1. (a) twat (b) putz (c) slit (d) pussy (e) box (f) snatch
2. (a) joint (b) tool (c) dick (d) prick (e) beaver (f) pecker
3. (a) nuts (b) ballocks (c) pubes (d) stones (e) cobblers (f) goolies
4. (a) privates (b) jugs (c) melons (d) bristols (e) knockers (f) boobs
5. (a) tail (b) bum (c) beam (d) bush (e) butt (f) rear

EXERCISE 1.2
Here are some less common slang terms for the various parts of the body dealt with in this chapter.
Try to identify the part of the body to which each group of synonyms refers.

1. assets, bangers, bazongas, ba- micky, middle leg, tube, pen- oyster catcher, patch, oven,
zookas, billibongs, bombers, cil, dingdong, sausage, poor man's blessing, quiff,
bouncers, bubbas, plonker, winkle, stalk, rig, quim, quiver, slot, snapper,
butterballs, cantaloupes, ding-a-ling, prong, tonk, shaft, steam room, tunnel,
charlies, gazongas, goombas, candle, joy stick, reamer, tick- twitcher, vertical smile
hooters, howitzers, ler, wazoo, wire, yang 4. chooms, bangers, cherries,
kalamazoos, lactoids, 3. bearded clam, hair pie, ace of clangers, danglers, eggs,
nancies, palookas, patooties, spades, bull's eye, bunny, jewels, marbles, onions,
peaches, torpedoes, water- button hole, cleft, cockpit, plums, pounders, swingers,
melons, wobblers, woofers, cookie, cranny, crease, knackers, pills, rocks
zeppelins, zingers cunny, front window, 5. prat, moon, rass, rear, duff,
2. cherry picker, yard, knob, furburger, honey-pot, key- jacksy, tochus, bim, slats,
poker, doodle, snake, needle, hole, Lady Jane, meat quoit, chuff, zatch, bronze,
pego, machine, dingus, organ, grinder, nest, niche, nook, tush, acre, heinie

EXERCISE 1.3
Translate the following sentences into English.
1. Empece a frotar mi polla contra su vientre. Me aparto de un empujon. 2. Empece a jugar con su cono. Se erigio
el clitoris y lo acaricie con ternura. 3. Mi marido no tenia personalidad, solo una enorme polla. 4. No te quedes
ahi tocandote las narices, haz algo. 5. Me picaba el ano pero habia demasiada gente y no podia rascarmelo. 6.
Tetas y culo. Lo unico que le importa son las tetas y el culo. 7. Nos metimos debajo de las sabanas y empece a
jugar con sus partes. 8. Con un movimiento de mandlbulas el perro podia arrancarme las pelotas. 9. Me picaba
el escroto. El picor se fue haciendo insoportable. Segui caminando y rascandome los cojones. 10. A veces se
metian las sustancias quimicas nocivas por el agujero del culo. 11. Las chicas no tenian tetas y sus traseros eran
pequenitos. 12. Los pelos de su cono eran largos, rizados y enredados. 13. Se sento en mi regazo y me beso. Mi
polla se puso como una roca en contacto con su firme trasero. 14. Hay que darle una buena patada para que se
ponga en movimiento. 15. Pase un dedo por su cono, pronto se humedecio y se abrio. Meti el dedo dentro. 16.
Se me fue el pie y me cai de culo. 17. Tenia miedo de las enfermedades de la piel, el cuero cabelludo y el ano. 18.
Todavia estaba chupando las tetas de Clare. Los pezones estaban alzados. 19. Tenia su mano puesta en los
huevos de Tom, luego la subio hacia arriba y agarro su polla. 20. Era una cuestion de valor. Me pregunte si
tendria suficientes cojones.


EXERCISE 1.4
(Gina picks up a Penthouse magazine and tells two of her male friends, Mitch and Tommy, what she
thinks of the image of female beauty the magazine presents.)
I'm speaking to both of you, okay, you're both fucking insane. You wanna know
what your problem is? MTV, Playboy, and Madison fucking Avenue. Yeah. Let me explain
something to you. OK, look, girls with big tits have big asses, girls with little tits have
little asses. That's the way it goes. God doesn't fuck around, he's a fair guy. He gave the
fatties big, beautiful tits, and the skinnies little, tiny niddlers. If you don't like it, call
him. Hey Mitch. Thank you. Oh guys, look what we have here... (picking up Penthouse
magazine and opening it) Look at this: your favorite. Yeah, that's nice, right? Well, it
doesn't exist, okay? Look at the hair. The hair is long, it's flowing, it's like a river. Well,
it's a fucking weave, okay? And the tits. Please, I could hang my overcoat on them. Tits,
by design, are intended to be suckled by babies. Yeah, they're purely functional. These
are silicone city. And look, my favorite, the shaved pubes. Pubic hair being so unruly and
all. Very vain. This is a mockery, this is a sham, this is bullshit. Implants, calogen, plastics,
capped teeth, the fat sucked out, the hair extended, the nose fixed, the bush shaved —
these are not real women, alright? They're beauty freaks. And they make all us normal
women with our wrinkles, our puckered boobs, our cellulite, feel somewhat inadequate.
Well, I don't buy it, alright? While you fuckers think that there's a chance in hell that
you'll end up with one of these women you don't give us real women any thing
approaching a commitment. It's pathetic. I don't know what you think you're going to
do. You're going to end up 80 years old, drooling in some nursing home, and then you'll
decide that it's time to settle down, get married, have kids. What are you going to do:
find a cheerleader?
From the screenplay Beautiful Girls by Scott Rosenberg
Using what you have learned in this chapter and in the preceding exercises and what you can guess from
the context, find words or phrases in the above passage corresponding to these descriptions:
1. A word which, as an adverb, means 'very, extremely'; and which, as an adjective, has no precise
meaning but is used purely for negative emphasis. 2. Three words which mean female breasts. 3. The
standard American English term for buttocks. 4. A phrasal verb which means to tamper, play, toy or
meddle, to treat in an irresponsible way. 5. Two words for pubic hair. 6. A word which, in this context,
means mendacious nonsense. 7. A derogatory term which can be used of any male.


2: BODY FUNCTIONS

l.a piss -mear, meada
Although both a verb and a noun, like its synonyms listed below, piss is frequently used in verbal
constructions like to go for a piss, to take a piss, to have a piss, etc.

« I finished my drink and went into the • Acabe mi copa y fui al bano a echar una
bathroom to take a piss. (James Laffan) meada.
» How in hell could a man enjoy being • Cdmo cono podia un hombre disfrutar si su
awakened at 6:30 a.m. by an alarm clock, leap sueno era mterrumpido a las 6:30 de la mana-
out of bed, dress, force-feed, shit, piss, brush na por el estrepito de un despertador, tenia que
teeth and hair, and fight traffic to get to a pla- saltar fuera de la cama, vestirse, desayunar sin
ce where essentially you made lots of money ganas, cagar, mear, cepillarse los dientes y el
for somebody else? (Charles Bukowski) pelo y pelear con el trafico hasta llegar a un
lugar donde uno suele ganar cantidad de di-
nero para otro?
• I looked out and saw a guy standing on the • Mire y vi a un tipo de pie en el porche,
porch, pissing. He was pissing against a bush meando. Estaba meando en un arbusto a la
to the left of the porch. The piss shot upwards izquierda del porche; la meada se arquea ba
in a solid stream and then fell back downwards en un solido chorro, hacia arriba, y luego,
into the bushes. (Charles Bukowski) hacia los matorrales.

SYNONYMS: pants!' (James Leo Herlihy) lamppost. (Seamus Easton)
piddle • Every ten minutes or slash All those hours I've been
leak Used mainly in the expres- so he excused himself with the sitting out here waiting for you,
sion to take a leak. • Sometimes words, 'I'm going for a piddle. afraid I'd miss you. Christ, I'm
somebody would say, 'Excuse Be right back.' I concluded he bursting for a slash. (James
me, I have to take a leak'. This had a bad bladder. (Daniel Laffan)
was a way of saying that the Ogg) • American researchers, tinkle That's another problem
speaker intended to drain liquid standing with stopwatches out- with suede shoes: you're always
wastes from his body through a side motorway service stain danger of tinkling on them
valve in his lower abdomen. tions, have found that women and then the stain's there for-
(Kurt Vonnegut Jr.) take almost twice as long to ever, isn't it? (Alan Beretta)
pee • I had to take a pee, so I ex- piddle as men, or rather twice wee-wee Mainly a children's
cused myself and I went to the as long to emerge from the toi- word. • Don't forget, dear, the
bathroom down the hallway. lets; one and a half minutes for little ones do a wee-wee before
(Smoke) • 'Hey, hey, what's the a woman, an amazing 44 sec- they go to bed. (E.A. Whitehead)
matter?' Joe asked. Ratso looked onds for a man. Something has widdle • — 'Anybody know
at him quickly and then he looked to be done. (Guardian) where Frankie is?' — 'Yeah,
away again, and softly, almost in- pish (Scots, Irish) The dog he's just stepped out for a
audibly, he said, 'I peed.' 'You stopped suddenly, cocked a widdle'. (Alan Beretta)
what?' 'Peed! Peed! Peed my hind leg and pished against the


2. b shit, shite -cagar, mierda
Shit is the more common of the two forms but shite, used mainly in northern England, Scotland and
Ireland, is the more expressive. It is both a verb and a noun. As a verb, shit is irregular: either shit-
shit-shit, or shit-shat-shat. As the examples demonstrate, the word is frequently used in a figurative
sense. Numerous idiomatic uses are examined in more detail in Chapter 10.

• As a schoolboy I could not think of a time • Cuando era nino jamas se me habia ocurri-
when I had ever shat in company. I had always do la idea de cagar acompanado. Siempre ha-
shat alone. In a room that was locked. The bia cagado solo. En una habitaci6n cerrada con
thought of having to shit with someone doing pestillo. Pensar que tendria que cagar con al-
the same thing twelve inches away disgusted guien haciendo lo mismo a treinta centfme-
me, (Ken Lukowiak) tros me asqueaba.
• I went to the crapper and had a shit. • Fui al bafto y eche una cagada. El estreni-
Constipation wasn't one of my problems. miento no era uno de mis problemas.
(John Ogilby)
• I felt like having a shit. I took off my pants • Tenia ganas de echar una cagada. Me baje
and squatted in the brush with the flies and los pantalones y me agache entre los arbus-
the mosquitoes. I had to wipe myself with tos con moscas y mosquitos. Me tuve que
leaves. (Charles Bukowski) limpiar con hojas.
» Piles of rubbish everywhere, dirty plates, shit • Montones de basura por todas partes, platos
stains in the toilet, crud in the bathtub. sucios, manchas de mierda en el retrete, cos-
(Gabriella T. Oldfield) tras en la banera.
• She talked about Huxley and Lawrence in • Ella hablaba de Huxley y de Lawrence en
Italy. What shit. (Charles Bukowski) Italia. Vaya mierda.
• I'm going to tell her the truth. I'm going to • Le voy a decir la verdad. Voy a acabar con
end this shit. (James Laffan) esta mierda!

RELATED TERMS: ing or very little. • Their coun- pooh,' one four-year-old tod-
try was by far the richest and dler w h i s p e r e d d i f f i d e n t l y .
crap From the name of Thomas most powerful country on the (Gladys Hellman)
Crapper, inventor of the flush- planet ... Most other countries • Gus and Theo, his best mate
ing toilet. • Oh, Doctor, I wipe d i d n ' t have d o o d l e y - s q u a t . from playgroup, hit the potty-
and I wipe and I wipe, I spend (Kurt Vonnegut Jr.) talk stage together. Their an-
as much time wiping as I do dump (US) • You ever take a them, or should I say mantra,
crapping, maybe even more. I dump made you feel like you'd became, 'Poo-poo, wee-wee,
use toilet paper like it grew on j u s t slept for twelve hours? bum-bum', repeated in the car,
trees. (Philip Roth) (Glengarry Glen Ross) • I want at the lunch table and at teatime
dingleberry A piece of dried that head so sanitary and squared until the boys were red-faced
faecal matter attached to the hair away that the Virgin Mary her- and gasping from giggling.
around the anus. • With a pained self would be proud to go in (Carol Hall)
expression he detached the tena- there and take a dump! (Full poop, poopy • I never saw such a
cious dingleberry, then fetched Metal Jacket) dirty town — litter scattered eve-
it up to eye level for inspection. pooh, poo, poo-poo A chil- rywhere, dog poop all over the
(James Laffan) dren's word, from the exclama- place. (Gabriella T. Oldfield) • A
doodley-squat (US) Mainly tion pooh provoked by an un- recent cartoon on Japanese TV
used figuratively, meaning noth- pleasant smell. • 'I need to features a hero who makes a


sidekick out of his own faeces. hadn't been there more than ten the water. The madam bends
Meanwhile, at the local temple, minutes before there were three down and puts a towel over it.
visitors buy plastic poop trin- turds on the carpet. A superfi- (Henry Miller)
kets to bring them good luck. cially humorous but vicious dis- • Life and literature is a ques-
And at the corner store, a vast pute ensued about who had done tion of what one thrills to, and
array of poop-shaped candy is the turds. (Helen Fielding) • The further than that no man shall go
on sale — a veritable copropha- five of us are standing there without putting his foot in a turd.
gous feast. (Salon) looking at the bidet. There are (Philip Larkin)
turd A piece of excrement. • I two enormous turds floating in

2. c fart -pedo
• God or somebody keeps creating women and • Dios, o quien sea, no para de crear mujeres
tossing them out on the streets, and this one's y de lanzarlas al mundo, y el culo de esta es
ass is too big and that one's tits are too small demasiado grande y las tetas de esa son de-
and this one is mad and that one is crazy ... masiado pequenas, y esta otra esta chiflada y
and this one can't control her farts. (Charles aquella es una histerica... y esta no puede con-
Bukowski) trolar sus pedos.
• At least McHugh wasn't there, stinking the • Al menos alli no estara McHugh apestando
place out with his farts. (James Laffan) los pozos con sus pedos.
• Sometimes when I'm drinking a cup of pale • A veces, cuando estoy tomando una taza de
tea in which he has dropped a rose leaf he co- te claro en el que ha echado un petalo de rosa,
mes alongside of me and lets a loud fart, right se me acerca y se tira un sonoro pedo en mis
in my face. He never says 'Excuse me!' (Henry propias nances. Nunca dice: 'jPerddn!'
Miller)
• When I fart in the bathtub, she kneels naked • Cuando me echo un pedo en la banera, ella
on the tile floor, leans all the way over, and se arrodilla desnuda, en el embaldosado sue-
kisses the bubbles. (Philip Roth) lo, se inclina y besa las burbujas.
• Another animal invented by the Creator of • Otro animal inventado por el Creador del
the Universe was a Mexican beetle which Universo era un escarabajo mejicano que po-
could make a blank cartridge gun out of its dia convertir su parte posterior en una espe-
rear end. It could detonate its own farts and cie de cartucho sin bala por el que lanzar pedos
knock over other bugs with shock waves. (Kurt a propulsion y abatir a otros bichos con las
Vonnegut Jr.) ondas de choque.

SYNONYMS: fart. • What one of you fuckers would go hee-hee-hee, as if she'd
farted? Christ, what a hummer! just accomplished something hi-
breezer (Austr) • How could (James Laffan) larious. (John Ogilby)
you get any sleep in a ward like roaster (UK) A hot, noiseless, squelcher A fart with liquid
that, with half a dozen old noisome fart. • You never knew content. Also known as a GBL
geriatric bastards snoring and she had unleashed a roaster until fart, an abbreviation of Gam-
wheezing and hawking and let- it was too late. They were silent bled But Lost. • He knew he
ting breezers all around you and deadly. The smell, like a fetid shouldn't have eaten the figs.
every blessed instant of the wind blowing over a field of pu- Now he'd be laying squelchers
night? It was like trying to kip trefying red cabbages, would hit from arsehole to breakfast
in a war zone. (Barry Osworth) you all at once, bringing a flood time. (John Ogilby)
hummer (UK) An evil-smelling of tears to your eyes. Then she


2. d the shits -la cagalera

* The introduction of fresh rations into our La introduccion de provisiones frescas en
bodies had a none-too-pleasant effect on our nuestros cuerpos tuvo un efecto nada agrada-
digestive systems. We got the shits. (Ken ble sobre nuestros aparatos digestivos. Nos en-
Lukowiak) tro la cagalera.
* After that dinner, I had the shits for a month. • Despues de esa cena, tuve cagalera durante
(Gabriella T. Oldfield) un mes.
* When I awakened I was sweating. I got up • Cuando me desperte estaba sudando. Me le-
and went to the bathroom. I had the running vante y fui al bano. Tenia diarrea. Cuando me
shits. Then I got up and wiped, looked; what incorpore y me limpie, eche un vistazo; vaya
a mess, I thought, what a lovely powerful un plato, pense, que adorable y poderosa
stink. Then I vomited and flushed it all away. peste. Entonces vomite y tire de la cadena.
(Charles Bukowski)

SYNONYMS: loupe. It gives me the runs. (Gabriella T. Oldfield)
(David Mamet) the squitters • — Had a rough
Aztec revenge Strictly, the term the squits (UK) It was supposed night last night. Boozing and
applies only to diarrhoea suf- to be a high-class Parisian res- whoring. Paid for it this morn-
fered by visitors to Mexico, but taurant, so you didn't expect the ing though. The agony in the
it is widely understood. • With loo to be one of those awful Arab lavatory. — The squitters? (E.A.
his luck he'd die of Aztec Re- affairs: two wretched footholds Whitehead)
venge anyway, first time he had to squat on and an obscenely the trots • I'd go easy on the ol-
a Bibb lettuce salad. (Joseph dark little hole in the middle. To ive oil if I were you, mate, un-
Wambaugh) cap it all, at least one previous less you're looking for a case of
the runs • I never eat canta- patron had clearly had the squits. the trots. (Alan Beretta)

2. e I shit-house, shite-house -retrete, cagadero

• He felt nauseous. He opened the door of the • Sinti6 nauseas. Abrio la puerta del retrete, y
shitehouse and went in. The place stank. He entro. El lugar apestaba. Se sac6 el pijo y em-
took out his prick and began to piss. pez6 a mear.
(Herbert Loth)
• Harry had to go for a piss. The shithouse • Harry tuvo que ir a echar una meada. El re-
was at the end of the corridor. (Herbert Loth) trete quedaba al final del pasillo.
• I went in and cleaned the shithouse, scrubbed • Me fui a limpiar el retrete, restregar la bane-
the bathtub, and changed the sheets and pillow ra y cambiar las sabanas y fundas de almoha-
cases on my bed. (James Laffan) da de mi cama.

SYNONYMS: thought, and put the paper in your casual. (Shaun Herron)
sock. That was it, do the whole can (US) • In the vestibule, as
bog, bogs • Hold on a minute, thing in the bog. They couldn't I'm buttoning my fly, I notice
will you, Kev, I have to go to the come into the bog with him; he'd one of them waiting for her
bogs. I'll be right back. (Diane put everything in his sock, flush friend to come out of the can.
Chanteau) • Go to the bog, he the bog, and come out looking (Henry Miller)


crapper • She heard a chain turds to clean the head. I want one go anywhere until we find it.
being pulled, then the sound of that head so sanitary and squared Especially not to the karzy.
flushing. Then Kevin emerged away that the Virgin Mary her- (Barry Osworth)
from the crapper, still plunged self would be proud to go in lav, lavo • That smell is famil-
intently in his paperback edition there and take a dump! (Full iar. Years ago I painted a ladies'
of Being and Nothingness. (Diane Metal Jacket) lavatory. Yeah, a lavo in a club
Chanteau) • The day Jon changed John (US) • — You sure you in Slater Street. That was a job I
the kitty litter, I nearly went into didn't see my hat? — Look in didn't forget. (E.A. Whitehead)
shock... Cyrus the Cat's little the John. — It isn't in the John. loo (UK) • Do you mind if I use
crapper certainly had begun to I wouldn't leave it there. (David your loo? (Helen Fielding)
smell. (Clea Simon) Mamet) • Have just been sick, and as I
• His function? He sees that toi- • Sanitary appliance manufactur- slumped over the loo trying to do
let paper is plentiful, especially ers are eager to make our toilets it quietly so Daniel wouldn't hear,
in the ladies' crapper. (Charles unisex. As if moving the John he suddenly yelled out from the
Bukowski) into the powder room isn't bedroom, 'There goes your inner
dunny (Austr) • Dangerous enough, even single-sex conven- poise, my plumptious. Best place
place A u s t r a l i a . What with iences are being equipped with for it, I say.' (Helen Fielding)
deadly poisonous spiders lurk- traditionally male attire. The shouse (Austr) Syncopated
ing under the rim of the toilet Soho bar Pop has installed the form of shit-house. • He spends
bowl, a man can't feel safe even Lady P, a urinal for women. half his bloody life locked up in
in the comfort of his own dunny. (Guardian) the shouse. Christ only knows
(Barry Osworth) karzy (UK) • They've got dope what he's doing in there.
head (US) • I want you two in here somewhere. Don't let any- (Barry Osworth)

2. f bumf -papel higienico
The word can have several meanings, depending on context. Usually it means toilet paper, but sometimes
it refers simply to paper of poor quality. It is often used derogatorily to mean official documents, as in
the third example.

• (UK) If you're going down to the shops, don't • Si vas de compras, que no se te olvide co-
forget to buy some bumf, love. We're nearly ger un poco de papel higienico. Casi no nos
out. (Diane Chanteau) queda.
• (UK) Thank you very much for your letter • Muchas gracias por tu carta y, por favor,
and please excuse the bumf this is written on. disculpa el papel cutre en el que esto esta
(Philip Larkin) escrito.
• (UK) Don't ever start a company, even a • No se te ocurra crear una empresa, por
small one, unless you like dealing with bumf, muy pequefia que sea, a no ser que te guste
'cause there's just no end to it. (Alan Beretta) el papeleo, porque eso es algo que no ter-
mina nunca.

SYNONYMS: towels, fill the soap containers, down, have a good wholesome
use lots and lots of deodorant, crap, then discover there's no
ass-wipe • Restrooms were al- and be sure there's plenty of ass- bloody bog-roll. What sort of
ways first. Clean the sinks, the wipe and paper toilet seat cov- shitehouse are you wankers
toilets, empty the baskets, get ers. (Charles Bukowski) running here anyway? (John
the mirrors, replace the hand- bog-roll • I hate that. You sit Ogilby)


2. g puke -vomitar, vomitona

• — You make me puke! Uh... you make me • — Me haces vomitar! Uf! ... me haces vo-
puke! — That wasn't a very nice thing to say, mitar. — Lo que has dicho es muy desagrada-
Martha. (Edward Albee) ble, Martha.
• I ran to the bathroom and puked. I tried to • Me fui corriendo al bano a vomitar. Trate de
brash my teeth but only puked again — the lavarme los dientes pero lo unico que conse-
sweetness of the toothpaste turned my gui fue vomitar de nuevo. El dulzor de la pas-
stomach. (Charles Bukowski) ta de dientes me revolvia el estomago.
• I stretched out next to her. We kissed. Her • Me arrime a ella. Nos besamos. Su boca olia
mouth smelled of puke. (Charles Bukowski) a vomito.
• You never knew. You could never be sure. I • Nunca se sabia. Nunca podia uno estar segu-
was scared. I felt like puking. (John Ogilby) ro. Estaba nervioso. Sentfa ganas de vomitar.
• Garbage man. I shuddered at the thought of • Basurero. Me estremeci al pensar en toda
all that garbage, the morning hangovers ... me esa basura, las resacas de madrugada ... y yo
puking my guts into the orange rinds, coffee echando las tripas junto a peladura de naran-
grounds, wet cigarette ashes, banana peels and ja, posos de cafe, cenizas mojadas de cigarri-
the used tampax. (Charles Bukowski) llos, cascaras de platano y tampax usados.

SYNONYMS:
All the following are verbs. Single words (barf, boke, chunder and spew) can also be used, like puke,
as nouns.

barf (US) • If you're liable to he would chuck up his week's sus Christ Almighty, what a
airsickness, make sure you keep wages on the pavement. (James night. Pah! I'm covered in that
this little bag handy, to barf into Laffan) rotten bastard's spew. Give us a
should the need arise. (Linda chunder (Austr) Even from a rag, somebody. (John McGrath)
Starr) • I ain't in favor of kiddy distance I could see he wasn't • Your letter found me last night
porn, you understand. Makes me in the car. But in the moonlight, when I came in off the piss: in
wanna barf. Some of those little on the ground next to the front point of fact I had spewed out
girls and boys, eight, nine years passenger door, I could make out of a train window. (Philip Larkin)
old. (Joseph Wambaugh) a great livid patch of chunder. throw up • My god, I feel aw-
blow beets (US) What was in (William Williamson) ful. I think I'm going to throw
that pie? Everybody who ate it go for the big spit (Austr) You up. (Helen Fielding) • Do you
is blowing beets. (Airplane) don't look too clever, Micky. know what those American sol-
boke (Scots, Irish) Noun as well Just one thing: if you're going diers did to your poor mother
as verb. • Many's the time, after for the big spit, stick your head while your poor father threw
a rough night in the boozer, out the window. Don't chuck up up his guts in the next room?
MacAleese and I leaned against in here. (Barry Osworth) Those bastards! (Lenny Bruce)
the same wall, boking our guts ralph (US) Imitative of the • — Your wife throws up a lot,
up. That's the kind of shared ex- sound of vomiting. • The doc eh? — Well, it's true... She
perience that cements a friend- gave him some pills that would does throw up a lot. Once she
ship. (John Ogilby) help him ralph it up. (Norman starts... there's practically no
chuck up Every Saturday night, Keaton) stopping her. (Edward Albee)
on his way back from the pub, spew Noun as well as verb. • Je-


2. h gob -escupir, escupitajo

• She gobbed in his face. (John Le Carre) • Le escupio en la cara.
• Moving her head, Jane used her tongue. • Moviendo su cabeza, Jane uso la lengua.
Andrew came. Jane gobbed on the carpet. Andrew se corrio. Jane escupio en la alfombra.
(Dympna Marston)
• Never mind his unpleasant habit of hacking • Ignora su desagradable costumbre de toser
up massive gobs of phlegm, which he then cantidades masivas de flema, las cuales
expectorates into the Persian carpet at his expectora hacia la alfombra persa a los pies
visitor's feet. (Salon) de sus invitados.

An uncountable noun, unlike its synonyms, snot is used with a singular verb. Derivatives are snotty,
snot-nosed, and snotty-nosed (mocoso, lleno de mocos, estirado).

• A thin moustache. Vacant eyes. Out of one • Un fino bigote. Ojos ausentes. De uno de
of his nostrils streamed a nearly invisible los orificios de su nariz caia un casi invisible
thread of snot that had finally gathered into a hilillo de moco que finalmente se recogia en
little gleaming ball. The ball had settled in the una pelotilla brillante. La pelotilla de moco
moustache and was gathering to drip off. se le habia quedado pegada al bigote y estaba
(Charles Bukowski) a punto de caerse.
• —You can't get snot off suede. The jacket's • — No se puede quitar los mocos del ante.
ruined. You can flake it off, but the black mark La chaqueta esta estropeada. Puedes raspario,
will always be there. — What'll I do? — Just pero siempre quedara una marca negra. — Que
snot over the whole jacket, that's the only puedo haeer? — Echa mocos por toda la cha-
thing you can do! (Lenny Bruce) queta, eso es lo unico que puedes hacer!
• It is estimated that, during one winter month « Se calcula que si durante un unico mes de
alone, if all the snot blown into Kleenex invierno, todos los mocos soplados en panue-
tissues in the United States and Canada were los Kleenex en los Estados Unidos y Canada
spread over the playing surface of the Yale se extendiesen sobre la superficie de juego del
Bowl, it would reach a depth of one-and-a- estadio de Yale, se alcanzaria una profundi-
half feet. (William Styron) dad de 45 centimetros.
• You've seen a lot of snot. You've seen it in • Se ve mucho moco. Se ve en la parte de
back of radiators in Milner Hotels. Looks like atras de los radiadores en los Hoteles
bas-relief wood-glue. (Lenny Bruce) Milner. Parece pegamento para madera.

SYNONYMS: his moustache. (Brian Adgers) film of 'Great Expectations' and
booger • Joker's so tough, he'd the fart and booger jokes in
bogey His words were dignified eat the boogers out of a dead 'Dumb and Dumber.' (Salon)
and moving, or rather, would man's nose ... then ask for sec- snotter I told her I was going
have been, had not Sheila found onds. (Full Metal Jacket) • Not and that nothing she could say
herself strangely fascinated by everything we see or read has to would change that. She stood
the large green bogey, still moist be improving. There's no reason there crying her heart out, snotters
and glistening, which adhered to a kid can't enjoy David Lean's blinding her. (James Laffan)


2. j come, cum -leche. semen

* She took her handkerchief out of her bag and • Sac6 el panuelo de su bolso y escupio en el
began gobbing into it as if she were como si estuviera escupiendo semen. —Eh —
expectorating come. 'Hey,' I said, 'What are le dije— Que estas tratando de venderme?
you trying to sell me? I didn't come'. (Char- No me he corrido.
les Bukowski)
* Dan, I love the taste of come. It tastes like • Dan, me encanta el sabor del semen. Sabe a
everything good ... just... coming out of your todo lo bueno... saliendo de tu polla... el baile
cock ... the Junior Prom ... an autumn de final de curso... una tarde de otono...
afternoon ... (David Mamet)
* Oh God, did you shoot in her mouth? Oh my • Oh Dios, £te corriste en su boca? Oh, Dios
God! And did she swallow it right down, or mio! Y se lo trago, o lo escupio, o se puso
spit it out, or get mad — tell me, what did she furiosa? Dimelo! Que hizo ella cuando te
do with your hot come! (Philip Roth) corriste?
. She's on her back, her legs are in the air, • Esta tumbada, sus piernas en el aire, se esta
she's coming like a choo-choo and she's corriendo como un tren y esta gritando — 'no
screaming 'don't stop.' (David Mamet) pares.'
Some girls think it's awful to come with a • Algunas chicas creen que es terrible correr-
client — but isn't there something rather se con un cliente — pero no es una falta de
declasse about never coming with a John? It's clase el no correrse nunca con un cliente?
like being one of those union employees who Es como ser un empleado sindicado que no
won't move a sheet of paper from one side of mueve un folio de un lado del despacho al
the desk to the other if it's not in their contract. otro si no esta por escrito en su contrato. Que
What a dreary way to work! (Salon) manera mas deprimente de trabajar!

SYNONYMS: view oinker jism as a repulsive scum (US) You'd be surprised
fluid they'd rather not think how many people like to do it in
gissum • ' S o n of a bitch kike!' about. (Hank Hyena) the back of the taxi. Last thing
Bubbles screams. 'You got jizz • —What's a jizz-mopper? every night, I have to clean the
gissum all over the couch! And —He's the guy that cleans up the scum off the back seat. (Jake
the walls! And the l a m p ! ' nudie booth after each guy jerks Newington)
(Philip Roth) off. The jizz-mopper's job is to shoot (US) Also used as a verb,
jism • Massage parlors were clean off the glass after each guy usually followed by off. • A Jew-
something new and exciting in shoots a load. I don't know if ish man, who cared about the
New York ... Men could be rubbed you noticed, but cum leaves welfare of the poor of the City
all over by a woman until their pe- streaks if you don't clean it right of New York, was eating her
nises squirted jism into Turkish away. (Clerks) • Woman wanted pussy! Someone who had ap-
towels. (Kurt Vonnegut Jr.) to fuck me last night. I said, 'No, peared on educational TV was
• L u s t y sows might regard baby, nothing doing.' Then I told shooting off into her mouth!
swine spunk as sexy, and Ne- her I'd do it if she gave me five (Philip Roth)
braska pig-ranchers accept it bucks. It takes five bucks worth spunk • We've got a leopard-
as a procreating necessity, but of steak to replace that jizz. skin rug in the flat and he wanted
ordinary humans undoubtedly (Charles Bukowski) me to fuck him on that. Only I'm


afraid of the spunk, you see, it little internal dripping you get let before his spunk starts run-
might adversely affect the after sex when you stand up, ning down the inside of your
spots of the leopard. (Joe and you know you have maybe leg? Well, this time — noth-
Orton) • You know that funny two seconds to get to the toi- ing. (Courtney Weaver)

2. k the rag -la regla, el penodo, compresa
A euphemistic term denoting a sanitary towel, sometimes made more specific and less euphemistic, as
in the final example below. It is used in various expressions referring to menstruation: to be on the
rag, to have the rag, to ride the rag, to wear the rag, to have the rags up, etc.

• — I think she had the rags up. — And how • — Creo que estaba con la regla, — Y tu
would you know? — I had a bit of finger pie. como lo sabes? — Le meti un poco el dedo.
(E.A. Whitehead)
• She told him she was wearing the rag, but • Le dijio que estaba con la regla, pero eso no
that didn't cool his ardour in the least. (James enfrio su pasion en lo mas mmimo.
Laffan)
• So why the long face, man? Your old lady • Por que esa cara, tio? Tu vieja esta con la
on the rag? (Poor Black Trash) regla?
• There was this thing on the floor., a rag • Habia esta cosa en el suelo... una compresa
someone had left there... a jamrag... left it on que alguien habia dejado alli... la habian de-
the floor of the lavatory! (E.A. Whitehead) jado en el suelo del bano!
• We had Darlene for openers. Probably • Teniamos a Darlene para empezar. Proba-
somebody had been murdered or was on the blemente alguna habia sido asesinada o tenia
rag or was having a screaming fit, and this was la regla o habia tenido un ataque de histeria y
Darlene's chance to dance solo again. (Char- esta habia sido la oportunidad para Darlene
les Bukowski) de volver a bailar sola.
•You ever seen a nun call a small child a 'fucking • Alguna vez has visto a una monja llamar a
cunt-rag'? Wasn't pretty. (Chasing Amy) un crio 'jodida compresa'? No fue bonito.

RELATED TERMS: weeks. (Graham Greene) • Girls flowers' as they called them in
used to say they had the curse. Or the days of Vigee-Lebrun and
the curse • Is it any wonder that they had a visitor. (New Yorker) Adelaide Labille-Guiard, your
menstruation is commonly called monthly flowers • You missed 'perennial visitor', your fall
'the curse'? (Saturday Review) herpes. You missed AIDS. You from the roof —is long overdue.
• I forgot the damn pill and I lucked out, fucked out. But Can you be —at forty-four—
haven't had the curse for six your period — your 'monthly pregnant? (Erica Jong)


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