Pastor Lydia Waters Hamilton Self Care Plenary Workshop Edited Version 97 2003

The Strong Black Woman
A Gentle Force for God
African American Women’s
Leadership Conference
August 5-7, 2010 Lake Junaluska,
North Carolina

Plenary Workshop
Self-Care
Dr. Lydia Waters Hamilton
Pastor of Administration,
St. Luke “Community” UMC * Dallas, TX

Dr. Lydia Waters Hamilton, Dallas, TX
St. Luke “Community” United Methodist Church
Statistics about Laity:
 43% of adults suffer adverse effects
from stress
 40% say their job is VERY or
EXTREMELY stressful
 25% view their job as their
NUMBER ONE stressor

Statistics about Laity:
 65% said workplace stress has
caused them difficulties
 62% had work-related neck pain at
the end of the day
 50% frequently skip lunch
 32% have difficulty sleeping
 2% have hit someone at work

Statistics about Pastors:
 90% work 55 to 75 hours a week
 80% believe pastoral ministry
has negatively affected their
families
 70% have a lower self-esteem
image now than when
they started

Statistics about Pastors:
 70% do not have someone they
consider a close friend
 90% feel they are inadequately
trained to cope with the demands
of ministry
 50% starting out will not
last 5 years

Personal Testimony
Dec. 24, 2000 – one day before
Christmas, I suffered a mini-stroke
in my nose (called a TIA –
transient ischemic attack)
What caused it? Two words:
Stress and burnout

A Look At the Busyness of My Life
Leading Up to the Stroke:
Serving on National, Conference
and District Committees
General Conference work

Steering Committee of the
Convocation of Black Pastors
Board, Strengthening the Black
Church for the 21st Century

• Co-Chair of the Pastor’s Institute
• Board, BMCR
• Board, Ordained Ministry (Elder’s Section)
• Chair, Conference of Clergy Women
• Chair, Ethnic Recruitment for the BOOM
• National Chair, Black Clergy Women UMC

• Member, Episcopacy Committee
• Member, Conference of Black Clergy
Women
• Preaching – two out-of-state engagements
each month
• Was in 14th year of pastoring the same
congregation

Personal Testimony – After the Stroke
 I rested for 4 months (not long enough)
 I worked 5 more years and relapsed
 My doctor said “you either
retire or die!”
 God said “choose life Lydia…
choose life!”

I took 3 years to focus on my
health and spiritual life

I went to my doctor and
worked out a plan

 I lost 60 pounds
 I started visiting other churches,
non UMC, to be anonymous
and replenish myself

EXERCISE
What stresses you most about
being a pastor or a lay person?

SYSTOMS
Stress vs. Burnout

Stress:
 Over-engaged
 Little physical energy
 Feeling empty
 Impatient and quick-tempered
 Generally Unhappy

Burnout:
 Defense characterized by disengagement
 Affects motivation and drive
 Produces demoralization
 Loss of ideals and hope
 Grief, sense of hopelessness
and helplessness

Stress Leads to Burnout
 Notice how the first 3 letters of
stress and stroke are the same
(S-T-R)
 Stop
 Take Control
 Rest

 “I’m exhausted”
 “I’m barely able to breath at all”
 “Visitors both comfort and tire me”
 “Even with dear friends, I feel the energy go
out of me”
 “I assumed that people I loved, gave energy
to me, and people I disliked took energy
away from me”

Sabbath Time
All life requires a
rhythm of rest

What is a Sabbath?
 Sabbath is rest
 God rested
 We are made to rest
 The lungs rest between exhaling and inhaling
 The heart rests after each life-giving beat
 In music, there are rest notes
 There are rest stops when you are doing distance
driving

Understanding Sabbath Rest:
 Sabbath is a way of being in time where we
remember who we are, whose we are, what
we know, and taste the gifts of the Holy
Spirit and eternity

 Genesis 2:1-3, “And on the seventh day,
God finished the work that He had done and
He rested”
 Exodus 20:8-11, “Remember the Sabbath
day and keep it holy…”

 Mark 1:35-39, “In the morning, while it was still
very dark, he got up and went out to a deserted
place, and there he prayed…”
 Mark 1: 32-34, “That evening at sundown, they
brought to Him ALL who were sick or possessed
with demons. And the WHOLE city was gathered
around the door, and He cured MANY…”

 Mark 6: 30-31, “The apostles gathered
around Jesus, and told Him all they had done
and taught. He said to them, ‘Come away to a
deserted place all by yourselves and rest for
a while. For many were coming and going and
they had no leisure even to eat…”

How to Take a Sabbath:
 Realize that you need Sabbath on a regular
basis (weekly, monthly, yearly)
 Don’t let the need for rest make you feel guilty
(leads to more stress)
 Learn how to stay quiet and still, and just be in
God’s presence to replenish your soul, your self
and your senses

How to Take a Sabbath:
 What does the Word say about rest?
 Listen to what your body is saying to you!
(signals of the spirit, soul and mind)
 Understand the meaning of rest
 Remember the Sabbath –
remember to rest

Self-Care: Caring for Yourself
while Caring for God’s People
Questions/Insights

Self-Care & Getting to Your Sabbath
What is God asking me to rest from?
How can I shorten my daily schedule?
Am I where I want to be?
Am I where God wants me to be?
What is God trying to tell me when I am constantly
running late to meetings, picking up the kids, etc.

Self-Care & Getting to Your
Sabbath
Write a letter to yourself listing the
THREE main stressors in your life and
how you plan to release those over the
next 90 days. Place the letter in the
envelope, address it to yourself and leave
it on the table to be collected.

Pastor Lydia Waters Hamilton Self Care Plenary Workshop Edited Version 97 2003

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