Chapter 3.5 of The Absolutely Crazy Matriarchy

1. Hello and welcome back to the Absolutely Crazy Matriarchy! If you haven't read any of the previous chapters, you probably should. It's chaotic enough as is. Now I'll turn you over to my Simself, Fire. Take it away.

2. "Thanks. Time for a quick recap, I think." Yes, that would be best. "Quiet! It's my camera time!"

3. "Last time in the Absolutely Crazy Matriarchy, our heir Rebakah Chandler, aka Beka, went through a particularly nasty pregnancy. She'd previously gorged n cheesecake, and we all know what THAT means." Get on with it.

4. "All right, all right. She had twin girls. Little brown-haired Bella Chandler, seen here with her grandmother Susan..."

5. "...And young Zoey Chandler. Two baby girls means two potential heirs." And an heir poll. "Yes. That too."

6. "The girls grew up into surprisingly cute toddlers, despite the fact that they share their father's rather strange nose." And cheeks. Especially Bella. "Do you not know the meaning of 'quiet'?"

7. "Oh, here's little Bella. By the way, Beka is a witch, hence the freaky aura and the glittery skin."

8. "The twins then grew into cute kids, which is where our next chapter begins: the childhood years." And all the ensuing chaos. "Or not."

9. "Thanks for the birthday present, Miss Fire." No problem, Bella. What do you think of it, Zoey? "It's AWESOME!" I'm glad that these two get along so well.

10. Beka, being a Fortune Sim, wanted her kids both to get into private school. They got in easily, with a score of 109/90. "Welcome to the Landgrabb Private School community, Ms Chandler." "A pleasure."

11. Zoey, you're meant to be in bed. "Zzzz... go 'way, Fire... wanna sleep onna couch... zzzz..." Fine then. Don't complain to me when you're tired in the morning.

12. "I'm tired." ... "All right, I'm sorry, I couldn't resist. Do I have to wear this uniform? It itches." Yeah, sorry about that.

13. Bella? What do you think of the uniform? "I like it. It's my favourite colour." Glad to see someone who isn't complaining.

14. Oh, Beka. You still miss your grandmother, don't you? "*sniff*... yeah. She was so good to me and Daniel* when we were little." She'd be very proud of you. "You think so?" I know so. *Daniel is Beka's older brother, who currently lives with his wife Shenene.

15. Agh! Why does she keep showing up? "They keep dragging me home with them, Fire." This is Amelia Pierce, heir from a failed matriarchy from ages ago. She won't leave me alone!

16. Homework time! "Okay, Bella, if x squared equals 144, then x has to be...?" "Um, 12?" "Very good!" Algebra, my nemesis. Just wait til you get to antidifferentiation. "Anti-hoo-ha?" Never mind,

17. "C'mon, Zoey, this is easy. Four plus twelve equals...?" "*sulks* Eleventy-one." "Just because you don't like maths doesn't mean you can ignore it, honey." "Fine, eleventy-TWO. Yeesh." :)

18. Look who's come to visit: Damion McCullough, the father of our heirs. Come to see the kids, Damion? "Of course, but I also wanted to see my beautiful Beka." These two still make me feel nauseated.

19. BAHAHAHAHAHAHA! She stepped on his foot! That was freakin' hilarious! "Shut up, Fire." Make me.

20. "Mum! Mum! I got an A+!" Ah, the ritual A+ dance and hop around. Hang on, if one of them has it...

21. ...then the other one has. Great. "You should be happy for us, Fire. We have platinum aspiration score now!" True. I've never seen a kid in aspriation failure. Note to self...

22. And here we have Popcorn, being all regal in Beka's chair. Nothing important about it, I just liked the photo. Captures the feline imperiousness beautifully.

23. "When I grow up, I wanna be an astronaut!" Um. Military career, perhaps? Maybe we have a Popularity Sim in the making.

24. "Wow! You'll get a rocket! That's awesome! Do you think you'll be able to go all the way to Io*?" "Where-o?" *Io is one of the moons of Jupiter. Bella seems to be a prospective Knowledge Sim. I haven't rolled for them yet... must do that.

25. Since the family has saved up a cool 200,000 I bought them a swimming pool. "CANNONBALL!" Bought them a hot tub too, couldn't fit it into the shot. I wanted a picture of Beka diving.

26. Beka... that nice shiny Aspiration symbol... "Means I just fulfilled my LTW!" Awesome. I didn't really need to since her Lifetime Aspiration bar was full, but I did anyways. LTW status = fulfilled!

27. Very smart, Beka. "Yeah. I wasn't doing well in covert ops. The blue glow kinda made me stick out a bit." I can see how that would be a problem.

28. "Hello, SimCity Butler Co.?" I got Susan to hire a butler, to see what it'd be like. Odds are I'll hate it and fire him after one day.

29. Bahaha! He has a funny nose! "Pearl Road, Pearl Road. Oh, this must be the place. ... What a dump!" No knocking my architecture. Don't make me trap you in the pool or something.

30. I'm glad Daniel's distracted here, otherwise he'd punch Jeeves here for staring down Shenene's dress. "Welcome to Chez Chandler. May I ask you what your business here today is?" "I'm the daughter-in-law of the mistress of the house STOP STARING AT MY CHEST and she invited us over REALLY STOP IT for afternoon tea." "Of course. This way, please." I fired him after that. He annoys me.

31. "Hey, Zoey, you wanna be a witch like Mum?" "Not really. I still want to be an astronaut." "You could be a space witch?" "Really? Cool!" Bella, stop winding up Zoey. It's not her fault she's gullible. "Sorry, Miss Fire."

32. About time you showed up again, Holly. Your great-grandchildren are almost grown! "I have great-grandchildren? That's fantastic? How many?" Two girls. "Oh no, this isn't about to turn into an heirship battle, is it?' Not if I can help it.

33. I love it how kids do this. It's so sweet. "Did you bring me any candy, mum?" Or not.

34. This reminds me of my real life cat, only she takes up way more room.

35. Birthday time! Will they be beautiful belles or one-syllable-wonders? Make a wish, Zoey. "I wish for..."

36. "Yay Zoey!" "Glittery!" Again, Legacy Sims are worse than magpies.

37. "I wish for loads of kids!" Zoey has rolled Family. Her turn ons are red hair and makeup, and her turn off is unemployment. Her LTW is to marry off six kids. Unless she's the heir, she's not going to achieve that. "Odds are fairly slim even if I am made heir." Too right. Six kids? Too many.

38. Bella's turn! "I wish..."

39. "Spinspinspin..." "Grow up pretty, Bella!"

40. "I wish for bubble blowers, parties and hot tubs!" Bella rolled Pleasure, with a LTW to top the Culinary Career track. Her turn ons are black hair and fitness, and she is tuned off by robots. "Nice, easy LTW." You can say that again. "Nice, easy..." Shut up.

41. Come to see your great-granddaughters' birthdays? "You got it. They're so beautiful, it almost makes me cry." Yeah, yeah. Ghosts can't cry. "We can too. Except it's ectoplasm rather than salt water." Great. Needed to know that.

42. Well, it's heir poll time, folks! For your voting help, I will do a quick recap of personalities, etc. Candidate One: Zoey Chandler Zoey's personality is 10/3/2/2/10. Her Aspiration is Family, with a LTW to marry off six kids. Her turn ons are red hair and makeup, and her turn off is unemployment. She's feisty, a little on the brainless side, and a bit gullible. Predestined hobby is Science. Positives: Recessive hair and eyes. Negatives: A bit too fond of pink.

43. Candidate Two: Bella Chandler Bella's personality is 7/3/3/10/10. Her aspiration is Pleasure, and her LTW is to top the Culinary career. She is turned on by black hair and fitness, and really dislikes robots. She's intelligent, pretty and a little uptight. Her predestined hobby is Tinkering. Positives: Finally, a new predestined hobby! Also has an aspiration more compatible with legacies. Negatives: Has Damion's squirrel cheeks, and dominant genes. That's it for this chapter; the next chapter will start production right after my heir poll on boolprop.com finishes. To vote, look up threads written by thefireeternal.

44. And to finish - when things go horribly, horribly wrong... "What the boolprop happened to my lawn?" Toodles!