Strategies for dealing with difficult people at the workplace

1. Tips on Dealing with
Difficult People at Work

2.  Difficult People are…

3.  Difficult People make you feel…

4. Training Objective:
 How you can better cope, interact with, deal with,
and survive Difficult People in your daily
encounters.

5. The Core Rules
for Dealing
with Difficult People.

6. Rule #1 in Dealing with DP
 Don’t take DP personally. DP are equal opportunity
annoyers.

7. Rule #2 in Dealing with DP
 Don’t try to change DP; it usually won’t work. You
can only change the way you react to DP.

8. Rule #2 in Dealing with DP
 Don’t try to change DP; it usually won’t work. You
can only change the way you react to DP.
“Managing Behaviors v. Fixing People.”

9. Rule #3 in Dealing with DP
 The system (not you) needs to work at removing
difficult people.

10. Rule #4 in Dealing with DP
 Don’t let difficult people suck you in or change you.
(Don’t fight back, retaliate or try to beat DP at their
own game. They’ve been practicing their whole life;
you’re a lowly amateur.)

11. Rule #5 in Dealing with DP
 Don’t try to merely appease DP.
 (DP will keep coming back for more;
change the way you react to DP and your
life will be better)

12. A Basic Set of Strategies
for
Dealing with DP

13. A Basic Strategy for Dealing with DP
1. Start out by examining yourself.
2. Explore what you are experiencing with a trusted
friend or colleague.
3. Approach the DP for a private discussion using an
“I” message.
4. It’s okay to confront the DP publicly.
5. Be direct but use the right tone.
6. Listen for interests not issues.

14. A Basic Strategy for Dealing with DP
1. Deal with the issues and interests; not with
changing the person.
2. Competitive people: treat the situation as a sport
(“win-win”).
3. Avoiders and Compromisers: treat the situation as
an exercise in self-improvement.
4. It’s ok to test!
5. Learn from your experiences!

15. Dealing with Specific Types
of Difficult People

16. “Accept what you can’t change.”
“Try to understand these fallible humans.”
--Albert Ellis

17. “ As novices, we think we’re entirely responsible for
the way people treat us. I have long since learned
that we are only responsible for the way we treat
people.”—Rose Lane
“He who controls others may be powerful, but he who
has mastered himself is mightier still.”
—Lao-tzu