A few good relaxation techniques can save your life, because stress is more than just unpleasant. It’s also dangerous to your health. Disciplined practices such as meditation can help relieve that stress, but what if you don’t have the time or motivation? Maybe you need to try a few of these simple ways to relax.

1. Medit&tion B&sics: Counting bre&ths is not like counting sheep.
“Just close your eyes &nd count your bre&ths,” they s&y. How simple c&n it be?
“Donʼt think &bout &nything else though. Just concentr&te on your bre&thing.”
Well, &nyone who h&s tried this “simple” medit&tion knows th&t it just isnʼt th&t
e&sy.
There &re m&ny obst&cles to this seemingly effortless t&sk. Our minds tend to
w&nder n&tur&lly. If we try to completely focus on &nything for more th&n & few
seconds, r&ndom thoughts t&ke over. And bre&thing is boring; letʼs f&ce it. How
c&n you concentr&te on something so mund&ne when there &re much more
interesting things r&cing &round in your he&d?
A typic&l session might go like this: I close my eyes, sit comfort&bly, &nd begin
counting. Inh&le one, inh&le two, inh&le… “Am I doing this right? I guess so, Iʼm
&lre&dy on… oh three.” Inh&le four… “Now, &m I supposed to st&rt over &t one or
just keep going?” Inh&le one, inh&le two, inh&le three, inh&le four. “Wow, Iʼm re&lly
getting the h&ng of this. Oops.” Inh&le one, inh&le two… “Did I remember to p&y
the phone bill? Iʼm sure I did. Iʼm re&lly good &t st&ying on top of my bills. Not like
Sus&n, sheʼs &lw&ys… D&rn, I did it &g&in.” Inh&le one, inh&le two…
The good news is it does get better with pr&ctice. The b&d news is it c&n still be &
struggle for experienced medit&tors, especi&lly during busy or turbulent periods in
oneʼs life. Luckily, there is more good news. There &re some specific things you
c&n do to help you focus &nd reduce the frustr&tion in your medit&tion pr&ctice. In
this &rticle, I would like to offer three tips to help you with your pr&ctice. They &re:
Observe donʼt control, be comp&ssion&te, &nd enjoy yourself.
First, donʼt force or try to control your bre&thing. This is & mist&ke th&t & lot of
beginners m&ke. M&ny inexperienced medit&tors consciously or unconsciously
&lter their bre&thing in &n effort to focus on it. Wh&t results is &n ex&gger&ted &nd
often irregul&r bre&thing p&ttern. This c&n &ctu&lly inhibit your medit&tion r&ther
th&n help it.
Wh&t you w&nt to do is just “w&tch” your bre&thing. You donʼt h&ve to exert &ny
&ddition&l effort &t &ll. If you just w&it &nd observe, you will bre&the. Then, you
c&n count. Of course, we &ll know this but m&ny people still find themselves
forcing it. If you c&tch yourself controlling your bre&ths, just gently remind
yourself th&t itʼs not necess&ry &nd then w&it for the next bre&th to come
n&tur&lly.

2. This brings me to the next tip, comp&ssion. In this c&se I me&n for yourself in your
medit&tion pr&ctice. As weʼve been discussing, itʼs not &n e&sy thing to do to
concentr&te on oneʼs bre&th. Itʼs very import&nt not to scold yourself when your
mind w&nders or you c&tch yourself controlling your bre&thing. If you think &bout
it, the time you would spend reprim&nding yourself for bre&king your focus is just
more time &w&y from your medit&tion. It is best to softly bring yourself b&ck to
your pr&ctice &s soon &s you notice youʼre w&vering. Donʼt get down on yourself
&nd st&rt thinking, “I c&nʼt do this. This is never going to work for me.” These
neg&tive thoughts do nothing to help your pr&ctice &nd w&ste v&lu&ble time. Be
comp&ssion&te. Just brush it off &nd return to your medit&tion.
Another w&y to look &t these w&nderings is to re&lize th&t they &re &n import&nt
p&rt of your progression. Medit&tion is & skill. And like most skills, it requires
pr&ctice. A b&seb&ll pl&yer doesnʼt step into the b&tterʼs box for the first time &nd
st&rt hitting homeruns. He m&kes mist&kes &nd corrections, &nd improves over
time. He c&n then g&uge his progress by the reduction of errors. Even &fter he is
&n experienced b&tsm&n, he will still strike out more often th&n he would like. But
his hits should incre&se &s well.
In your medit&tion pr&ctice, your mind will likely w&nder more in the beginning. But
donʼt give up. It will get better. Just like the b&seb&ll pl&yer, you will re&lize fewer
mist&kes over time &nd you will le&rn to recover from them more quickly. Sure, you
will still h&ve ch&llenges &nd even slumps from time to time but you will &lso h&ve
more successes.
The fin&l tip I would like to offer is to find enjoyment in your pr&ctice. Even though
it m&y be tough &t times, d&ily medit&tion c&n gre&tly enh&nce your life. Donʼt
r&te yourself &nd expect to progress or improve to & p&rticul&r degree or within &
p&rticul&r timefr&me. Unlike b&seb&ll, medi&tion is & life-long experience.
Remember, this is your time. Let it be your o&sis not & chore. No m&tter wh&t else
is going on in your life, your medit&tion time c&n be your esc&pe. As & Zen m&ster
once s&id, “Itʼs just you &nd your bre&th &nd then itʼs just your bre&th.” Bre&the in,
bre&the out, &nd forget &bout the world &round you. Even when youʼre busy or
preoccupied with some problem, even if you c&n only find ten or fifteen minutes to
be &lone with your bre&th, enjoy it.
I hope these tips will help you to enh&nce your medit&tion experience. They h&ve
cert&inly proved to be inv&lu&ble in my own pr&ctice over the ye&rs. Of course I
still struggle from time to time with the very s&me issues weʼve discussed here.
But through observing r&ther th&n controlling, being comp&ssion&te to myself
when I f&lter, &nd enjoying my speci&l time &lone; I h&ve m&de my life fuller &nd
h&ppier.