Upon completion of this anger management
facilitator training program, the individual will
be able to:
• Recognize the role of individual
responsibility in changing unacceptable
• Develop a working understanding of
anger/stress patterns and responses.
• Use the Adult Anger Management Workbook and
Contrasting Wheels of Behavior as skill
• Understand how to use the 4 anchors of the
Anderson model in classroom management.
• Make the training more interesting by using
ancillary training materials including videos and
• Help your participants through classroom
exercises and practice in order to:
o Identify “situational anger” that consistently
results in angry responses that can lead to
o Eliminate or minimize violent or unacceptable
o Learn new coping skills to handle anger, stress
and other feelings.
• Learn new assertive communication skills and listening
techniques effectively to improve effective
• Become aware of one’s own stress and anger signals
and develop the capacity to sense the mood of persons
with whom they must interact.
• Understand the entire curriculum is based on Emotional
• Use sports analogies to help to understand the
importance of practicing new skills.
Anger Management Curriculum
What is it?
• Anger Management is a course designed to teach
skills in Self-Awareness, Self-Control,
• Social Awareness and Relationship Management.
Contrasting Wheels of Behavior
• At any point, the group can be directed to
analyze a particular incident by using these
• The Positive Wheel is what we want each client
• The Negative Wheel relates to sell-awareness
Anyone can become angry –
that is easy. But to be angry
with the right person, to the
right degree, at the right
time, for the right purpose, and
in the right way – that is not
• An assessment/screening should be provided at intake.
• Goal of assessment is to select individuals who may
benefit from a psycho-educational/emotional intelligence
• Rule out candidates who are not appropriate for this type of
• Determine the clients level of EQ functioning.
Rule out the following categories
• Brain damaged clients
• Psychotic clients
• Clients who are abusing
drugs or alcohol
• Suicidal/homicidal clients
• Unmotivated clients
• Anderson & Anderson
recommends that an
assessment be done
• The recommended
assessment tool is the
BarOn Emotional Quotient
BarOn Emotional Quotient Inventory
• Masters or Doctoral level persons with training in
psychometrics may purchase these assessments
directly from MHS Systems
• Anderson & Anderson can provide the
assessments and interpretation on-line in
The Group Rules
• The Group Rules should be customized
for use in Jails,Prisons or Military
• When clients are in violation of the rules, a
review of the rules can quickly bring the
group together and back on target.
The 4 major areas of study in this model
• Anger Management
• Emotional Intelligence/Empathy
Control Log Workbook
Control Log DATE ____ / ____ / ____
Briefly describe the incident that resulted in your
referral to this program.
What did you want to happen in this situation?
What caused you to think that your actions would
get the results you wanted?
What feelings were you having?
Control Log Continued
Did you attempt to make light of your role in this
Did you attempt to blame the other person?
5. Cost of Anger:
What was the impact of your action?
On the other person:
Control Log Continued
6. Past Incidents:
Did any past aggression on your part affect this
What could you have done differently?
Definitions of Positive Wheel
Define the following terms in your own words:
• Active Listening
• Seeking compromise
• Honest Feedback
• Expressing Feelings
• Stating Needs
Definitions of Negative Wheel
Define the following terms in your own words:
The 4 Anchors
• The 4 Anchors which appear on the
following slide can be used as often as
needed to enhance EQ skills.
The Control Log
Anger, what is it?
• Webster’s definition is;
“a strong feeling of
by a real or supposed
• Anger is a basic
human emotion used
to express negative
The Primitive Roots of Anger
• Anger is generated in the part of the brain
called the limbic system. This is a primitive
part of the brain concerned with survival.
• The limbic system responds to external stimuli
nearly half a second before we can begin
thinking about what we have seen.
• The limbic system hijacks both the brain and
body in “emergency” situations.
Expression of Anger
When the expression of anger manifests itself
in antisocial, self-damaging, or behavior that is
damaging it becomes a problem.
Then the expression of anger needs to be
modified through the anger management
Anger is a problem when any of
the following situations occur:
• When it is too intense
• When it occurs too frequently
• When it last too long
• When it causes health problems
• When it destroys interpersonal
• When it leads to aggression of violence
Destroying the Old CDs
• Behavior that is
learned can be
modified with practice
• Anger Management is
recognize and manage
Burning a new CD
Anger Management helps
Individuals “Burn new CDs” so that when
someone pushes their buttons they can
respond with a new more appropriate tune.
The application of Anger Management
techniques increases Emotional
This is done by learning and practicing a
new set of skills.
Anger Check list
• Use the checklist in the client
workbook to assist your
students in determining their
level of anger.
for Managing Stress
o Identifying your stressors
o What causes you
o Keeping situations in
o Talking to yourself
o Just do it!
o Get away from it all
Symptoms of Stress
Check each stressor that you notice in your life:
• Checking time often
• Trying to do everything
• Eating very fast
• Rushing to places when there is perfectly
no need • Not getting along with
• Standing in lines others
• Walking fast even though you • Getting angry when
are not in a hurry
someone says you did
• Always trying to beat
• Not getting things done
• Worrying about things
1.Digital Thinking: Seeing things as
black or white a “one” or a “zero” with
no in-between value.
o “If I’m not perfect, then I’m a complete
2.Hot Stove Thinking: A mind set
based on a single event.
o It is destructive to assume that what has
happened in the past will always happen
1. Telepathic Thinking: You assume
you know what others are thinking
and how they feel about you.
2. “Chicken Little” Thinking: Making
the importance of an event larger
than it really is, seeing disaster
where there is none. The
o Is the sky really falling? Sky is
behavior is a reaction to
you, and you always
compare yourself to
6. Control Myopia: Unable
to tell the difference between
things that can and cannot
be controlled or which are
important or can be ignored.
1.Finger Pointing: You feel a
bad event is always someone
else's fault. You look only at
punishing the people who did
8. Hall Monitor Mindset: You feel there is a
code of behavior that must be followed by you
and others. You feel bad when the rules
aren’t followed and you see the injustice of it
Thinking: You think your
feelings are known to
everyone. You believe
that if you feel a certain
way, then the facts of the
situation must be in line
with that feeling.
• Our negative thoughts about stressors
often manifest as “worry.”
“Worrying is about as effective as
trying to solve an algebra equation by
– Mary Schmich
• Use positive self-dialogue
• This might be the time for CBT
o Cognitive Behavioral Therapy
Pay attention to your unwanted stress reactions.
o Are the self-messages true?
o Is the tone of the self-talk negative?
o If so, what type of belief does it represent?
(Digital Thinking, Hot Stove Thinking, Chicken Little
Thinking, and Control Myopia, etc.)
Affirmative Thinking - Continued
Negative self-talk with positive self-talk
based on affirmative beliefs.
o By making a new habit of affirmative thinking and
positive self-talk, you will be able to control your
unwanted reactions to stress.
Affirmations to Manage Stress
• I control my emotions.
• I get rid of all tensions.
• I take charge of my life.
• I can deal with stress.
• I let go and have fun every day.
• I have time to do my work every day.
• My life is great just the way it is.
• I am excited about my life.
Develop a “Stress Resistant”
• Keep situations In focus.
• Worrying about things
that will never happen.
• When put into a stressful
situation, people will
normally think the worst.
• Use positive self-talk to
fight this tendency.
• Talk to a Professional.
Coping Skills, the Do’s
• Physical exercise is an ideal way to
help reduce your stress level.
• Exercise has a calming effect that
lasts long after the exercise session
Coping Skills, the Do’s
• Take a mind trip
• Do a body inventory
o Sit or lay in a comfortable position and
mentally scan your body for tense
o Start at the bottom and work your way
up your body relaxing each area as
you go alone.
• Talk yourself down with calming
• Eating and smoking are not a good
way to deal with stress.
• Smoking and alcohol can:
o increase the physical impact of stress
o increase the likelihood of depression.
Four steps to a less stressful life:
1.Recognize how your body reacts to
2.List of stressful or anxiety provoking
3.Practice makes perfect (do it in your
4.Practice makes perfect (do it for real)
How well do you manage stress ?
• Can you name three
situations that cause
stress in your life?
• Can you list three
symptoms, physical, e
motional or behavioral
that occur when you
1.Are you able to maintain the
2.Can you sometimes talk yourself
out of feeling stressed?
3.To what extent can you
anticipate stressful situations
and apply prevention strategies
to protect yourself?
• Do you know and use relaxation
techniques like deep breathing or
• When you feel stressed, do you ever
exercise to get rid of this feeling?
• Make a list and prioritize tasks to keep yourself
from feeling too rushed?
• How do you plan your activates to avoid or
• Are you able to express your
• Can you communicate
effectively with others when
• Are you able to listen to
others with a sense of
concern and caring?
Use the stress log to
keep track of the
stressors and responses
you noticed through the
• Choose two high risk situations which
you are concerned about now.
• Identify your physical, emotional, and
behavioral reactions to the stressor.
• Write the situations down and identify
three coping strategies or ways to
handle these with our resorting to
1.What is stress?
2.What are three skills you can use to manage
3.Name two physical signs of stress.
4.Name two emotional or behavioral symptoms of
What do we mean by:
1.“stress is good”?
2.“stress is harmful”?
3.“stress is energy”?
4.What causes stress in your life?
Emotional Intelligence (EQ)
Putting your heart over your head.
EQ skills can be practiced and
learned at any point in one’s life.
EQ is a greater predictor of success in
life, work and marriage than is IQ.
Our emotions guide us in facing
predicaments and tasks too important
to leave to intellect alone.
The Four Domains of Emotional
• Self-awareness facilitates both empathy and self
• Empathy and self control combine to provide
effective relationship management.
• Emotional self
one’s own emotions and
recognizing their impact.
• Accurate self
one’s strengths and
• Self Confidence: A
sound sense of one’s self
worth and capabilities.
• Emotional self control: Keeping disruptive
emotions and impulses under control.
• Transparency: Displaying honesty and
integrity – trustworthiness.
• Adaptability: Flexibly adapting to changing
situations or new obstacles.
• Achievement: The drive to perform to meet
• Initiative: Readiness to act and seize
• Optimism: Seeing the possibilities in events –
“The glass is half-full.”
• Empathy: Sensing others’
emotions, understanding their
perspectives, and taking active
interest in their concerns.
• Group awareness: Reading the
currents, decision networks, and
politics at the group level.
• Service: Recognizing and
meeting the needs of others.
• Inspiration: Motivating and
empowering with a compelling vision.
• Influence: Impacting decisions and
outcomes while respecting the rights
• Mentoring: Helping others to
• Conflict management: Resolving
Partnership, cooperation, and
Self Awareness: The Foundation
• Without self-awareness, we cannot be aware of our
• We cannot manage emotions we are not aware of, so
our emotions will tend to be out of control.
• Out of control emotions impair our ability to experience
empathy and to connect with others.
• When our emotions are out of control, our relationships
suffer – we do not have social awareness or the ability
for social management.
Self Awareness and Anger
• Self awareness allows us to
notice destructive feelings, such
• Resentment can be used to
• Self control allows us to use
assertive communication to
resolve emotional distress.
• Thus, the resentment does not
continue to fester bursting out as
Emotions & Feelings
• Emotion: A set of body-rooted survival
mechanisms that have evolved to turn
us away from danger and propel us
forward to things that may be of
• Feelings: The mental awareness of
The Importance of Emotions
• A life without emotion, without joy or
love, sadness or anger, would not be life as we
• Emotions allow one to make rational
decisions, especially in a moment of crisis.
• Emotions help us to function efficiently in any
• Without emotions it can be difficult to make the
simplest decision or to pursue any single plan to
• Without emotions it is difficult to evaluate one
thing over another.
Managing Negative Emotions
1.Identify the feeling.
2.Ask if it is healthy
1.If it’s not healthy
work to put it out of
The Four Agreements
Don Miguel Ruiz’s book, “The Four
Agreements”, exposes self-limiting beliefs and
shows how to strengthen emotional
1.Be impeccable with your word.
2.Don’t take anything personally.
3.Don’t make assumptions.
4.Always do your best.
• Often, self-talk is negative and hurtful:
o “Oh, I’m such an idiot to have done that again!”
• Self-talk may be aimed at others and lead to
o “What a jerk he is! Is he too stupid to use his turn
• Being impeccable with our word means
learning to reframe our self-talk.
• Positive self-talk will break the anger
cycle and led the way towards higher
• Positive self-talk is honest, but non-
judgmental. It is being impeccable with
• Frequently it is a challenge to develop
• With practice positive self-talk will
Anger First Aid
• When the limbic system is running amok
and surging with adrenaline, a simple
strategy to deal with anger is needed.
• Anger First Aid consists of three simple
steps to apply whenever you become angry
in order to keep from acting out
Take a Time Out
• Whatever situation triggers anger, angry people
are in no state of mind to resolve it effectively.
• The limbic system impairs judgment and the
ability to reason during anger.
• It is effective to wait until one has calmed down
before attempting to resolve the situation.
Three Elements of a Time-Out
1.Tell the other person that you are
taking a time-out.
1.Tell the other person how long your
time-out will be.
1.Actually take a mental time-out. Do not
focus on the problem or how you have
been wronged – this will only make
• According to Six Seconds, the leading
emotional intelligence organization in the
• It takes six seconds to manage anger
• It takes six seconds to create compassion
• It takes six seconds to make a difference
Situation: Describe the situation about
which you became angry.
• Beliefs – What did you tell yourself about
• Feelings – Describe how you felt.
• Actions – Describe what you did.
• Dispute – If your thinking is what caused
the anger, modify your thought
Seven Steps to Anger Control
4 Key Elements:
1. The ability to listen without judging.
2. Show understanding of what has been
3. Acknowledge and accept another’s
4. Don’t impose your beliefs on someone
Roadblocks to Communication
Eleven communication stoppers
7. Name calling
9. Denying feelings
8 Positive Communications Skills
5.Positive body language
4 Styles of Communication
Assertive Communication Model
• Review the original entry on each client’s
• Contrast the changes or lack of changes.
• Suggest problems areas for future work.
• Ask each client to contribute feedback to
those completing the course.
The Key to Success in Mastering
• Motivation to change