Bobby's Books uses children's literature to help kids cope with grief, loss, and change. It provides books, seminars, and resources to empower adults to support children experiencing difficult emotions. The program highlights how stories can be teaching moments and offers tips for reading with kids. Its goal is to normalize grief and help both children and adults discuss difficult topics.
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Using Bobby's Books to Help Kids Cope
1. Bobby’s Books
Using children’s
literature to empower
Don’t Flush the Goldfish! adults to help children
Using Bobby’s Books to cope with grief, loss,
Help Kids Cope and change.
Consider ……
How old were you when you experienced
a significant loss, e.g. death, parents’
The History of divorce?
Bobby’s Books Were you a child when you attended a
funeral for the first time? How old?
What were your feelings & thoughts
then?
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What Is Grief? Common Feelings
The natural reaction to loss is a process Sadness
unique to each individual, called grief. Emptiness
Abandonment
Experiencing loss is not easy or enjoyable Anxiety
for adults or children. It is necessary. Fear
From the moment life begins, loss and
change are forever happening. Guilt
Insecurity
Numbness
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2. Myths About
Common Behaviors
Children & Grief
Regression Children only grieve for a short time
Panic A child’s grief proceeds in predictable,
Explosive emotions orderly stages
Withdrawal – ―She should be over this by now.‖
Acting out Infants & toddlers are too young to grieve
Provoking rejection Bereaved children grow up maladjusted
Changes in sleeping & eating patterns Children are better off if they don’t attend
funerals
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What hinders…… What helps….
Not talking about the loss, death Having a ―child‖ within
Not having the opportunity to attend the Thinking like a kid again
funeral Inviting the child to tell his/her story
Being labeled and given Rxs too quickly Being patient
Family ―rules‖ like ―Boys don’t cry.‖ ―Companioning‖ the child
Making statements like ―You’re the man of Increasing your knowledge about children’s
the house now.‖ grieving
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Teachable moments Examples of Losses
The “mini” losses of life provide children Relationships
with opportunities to build coping skills Objects
and a philosophy for dealing with Environment
suffering
Self
The importance of using Bobby’s Books
proactively Skills/Abilities
Habits
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3. Relationships Objects
Parental death Teddy Bear or favorite toy
Sibling death
Death of a close friend Pacifier
Death of a classmate Favorite blanket
Parental divorce
Loss of symbolic jewelry/class ring
Death of a grandparent
Death of a pet Driver’s license
Friendship ends Loss of items through vandalism or theft
Friend moves
Brother/sister leaves home
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Environment Self
Natural disasters Body part (arm, leg, teeth)
Flood Body organ (eye, transplant)
Home fire Body image – self-worth
Move Failed grade
Change schools Failure to be chosen
Blended family Loss of self esteem through teasing or ―put
New baby in home downs‖
Family separations Physical/sexual abuse
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Skills/Abilities Habits
Giving up sucking thumb
Physical disability Changes of daily routine
Learning and developmental differences School ends/begins
Injury Family meals end
Taking care of someone/something
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4. Recognizing and Understanding
Book Selection
Losses
By the time today’s children reach high Include Parents/Caregivers
school, 50% will have experienced the Picture Books
divorce of their parents, 20% will have Use of Puppets
experienced the death of one parent and
there will be an average of four moves per Writing
family. Art Activities
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Tips for reading aloud to children Love You Forever
Use care in choosing quality children’s literature Written by: Robert Munsch
Preview the book
Add prop whenever possible Illustrator: Sheila McGraw
If reading a lengthy book to small children, take a break— Possible Themes:
listening is hard work
Be sure all children can see the pictures in the book you – Continuity, love, change
are reading
Remember even teenagers enjoy a good picture book
Only read a story you enjoy yourself
Allow enough time for the story to be introduced, read and
discussed
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Eggbert, The Slightly Cracked Egg
Author: Tom Ross
Illustrator: Rex Barron
Possible themes: self esteem, coping
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10. Eggbert Puppets
Activities that can be shared after reading Make puppets accessible/encourage
this story to a child or group exploration
Facilitate communication with puppets
Discuss use of puppets in reading with
children
Make a puppet for home use.
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The Jester Has Lost His Jingle
Written and Illustrated by: David Saltzman
Possible Themes: change and building self-
esteem
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Writing
Talk it out
List words from the story
Write or tape the story
Write their own story or another chapter to
the story you are reading
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Tear Soup Tear Soup
Written by: Pat Schwiebert and Chuck a recipe for healing
DeKlyen after loss
Illustrated by: Taylor Bills
Possible Themes: grieving, coping, healing
Story by Pat Schwiebert
& Chuck DeKlyen
Illustrated by Taylor Bills
Copyright Grief Watch 2002
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How Are you Peeling? Foods with
Moods
Written and Illustrated by: Saxton
Freymann and Joost Elffers
Possible Themes: Emotions, Differences,
Reactions to Situations
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20. From How are You Peeling? Foods with Moods
by Saxton Freymann & Joost Elffers. The Power of Art to Express
Use a variety of art media
• An Arthur A. Levine Book published by Consider using clay, watercolors, crayons,
Scholastic Inc./Scholastic Press. fabric, legos, fingerpaint, sidewalk chalk,
etc.
• Copyright 1999 by Play with Your Food, LLC. Create and talk about it
• Used by permission
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Teachable Moments
―Learn it and live it‖
USE OF QUOTES…..
Look for natural moments
Repeat a significant part of a book Take an excerpt from a book
to generate discussion
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Core of the Bobby’s Books
Program
Educational Seminars
Bundle of twenty classics, favorites
Read-aloud guide
Bibliographies by category
– Loss of sibling, loss of pet
Website - www.bobbysbooks.org
Consult with Jennifer Taylor, Project
Manager – Jen@ohpco.org
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21. For more information
about Bobby’s Books,
please contact:
555 Metro Place North, Suite 650
Dublin, Ohio 43017
Phone: 614-763-0036
Toll Free: 800-776-9513
Fax: 614-763-0050
Jen@ohpco.org
www.ohpco.org
121 www.bobbysbooks.org
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