4. Hear Empathy
Model • Listen to the speaker without
• Don’t let your views/biases get mixed
with what you are hearing.
• Hear the feelings that come through; not
just the words.
• Put yourself in the speakers place.
• Try to see the from their point of view.
• Pay attention to how to justify their
• Make sure you understand what the
other person is trying to communicate
• Analyse and anticipate their message
• Show that you understand the speaker
and empathise with them.
• You may not have an advice, but being
an attentive and non judgmental listener
would still be appreciated.
Effective listening is a
vital component of
How well you listen will
communication and the
message you’re trying to
6. What is “Feedback?”
1. Feedback provides employees with perspective on their behaviors
2. and how those behaviors impact others and business results.
Why is feedback crucial?
• Increases employee engagement
• High performance and highly productive workforce
• Employee development & capability building
“Let us make a special effort to stop communicating with each other,
so we can have some conversation.”
7. Pillars of Effective Feedback
active listening –
Openness to self
direct as-is; and
not sugar coated.
be balanced –
stable – make it a
data / fact based
cannot rest on
9. Research has shown the impact of conversation on
36% 39% 34%
Impacts performance by
I know what I need to do
Source: A study by Mecer
I have a future here
I feel energized and connected
I am confident of delivering
What is in it for me?
A manager who adopts the Growth Mindset can
Have been observed to conduct more effective and quality conversations
10. “No! This isn’t
“YES! And we
“NO!” “Good idea, but...”
DEPENDS MAINLY ON WHAT WE
Appreciative Inquiry is a
perspective on the things,
people or actions that
invites us to see them
through an appreciative
or valuing eye.
11. Feedback Feedforward
Adopt a Forward - looking approach
to Giving Feedback
Emphasis is on the past
Critiques previous work
Describing what has happened
Focus on what you did and didn’t do well
Emphasis is on the future
Suggestions on what to do next
Ideas on how to improve
Focus on how you can develop and progress
Ask “what would you do differently next time?”
STAR IS THE LANGUAGE OF THE
WAY TO IMPROVE
IT’S AN EFFECTIVE WAY OF CAPTURING
IDEAL WAY TO MAINTAIN OWN
RECORD OF EVENTS
Why STAR? What’s in it for me?
1. Results are the effects of your
actions. They tell you what changes
or differences your actions made
and whether the actions were
effective and appropriate. S Situation
1. The Situation/Task is the background or
context in which you took action.
2. Situations or tasks are created by things like:
1. Situations faced in the job
2. Responsibilities undertaken or work
3. Demands made by a manager or customer.
4. Challenges in meeting a deadline or in
getting along with a coworker.
1. Actions are that you did in response to a
situation or task.
2. Actions are an important part of the STAR
because they show your behavior.
3. The action component of a STAR can also
record what you did not say or do.
4. This data gives the lens of understanding for
the performance data
14. “You get the best effort from others not by lighting a fire beneath them, but by
building a fire within.” --Bob Nelson
Do you have an opportunity to:
• Provide an employee motivational or developmental feedback?
• Help an employee understand or realize something?
• Help an employee make a decision or solve a problem?
• Support an employee’s career development or goal setting?
What is the goal “talk ratio” for a coaching conversation?
80 % employee to 20 % mentor!
“One way to know if you’re exhibiting service leadership is if
the people under you are growing and developing,”
Of the employees would be
more engaged if their
managers had regular
conversations with them
Would be more likely to stay at
their current company if they
received ongoing professional
Of the employees say they
have ongoing career
conversations with their
According to a Global Career Conversation study, 2016:
16. • Reason for coaching
• Desired outcome/goal?
• Specific examples you want to refer to (behaviors observed, etc)
• Impact of the behavior you have observed?
• What is their mindset – are they aware of the issue?
• How much time will be dedicated to this coaching session?
• What was communicated provided prior to the session?
• Do you have expectations of timelines for completion/improvement?
Developmental Conversation - Examples
GROW is a simple four-
step model for
and mentoring sessions.
It outlines a systematic
mentor and mentee for
Walk the Talk – Growth Journey
18. • helps you demonstrate you are listening
• encourages employee to share thoughts and
• prevents misunderstandings
• allows them to feel understood
• share expectations and feedback
• offer suggestions for improvement
• offer motivation, encouragement
• propose a specific plan of action
Ask to know
Listen to Reflect
Tell to Help
• What are we trying to accomplish?
• What does success look like?
• How will you know you have achieved this goal?
• How you should approach this situation?
• What are the benefits/downsides of each option?
• What factors should you consider when deciding?
• What’s been happening? Who is involved?
• How do you feel about this situation?
• What have you already tried?
• What could stop you from taking action?
• Will this decision help you accomplish your goal?
• What help do you need from me?
ASKING (Know What, Where, How & When)
LISTENING (To reflect) TELLING (To share, help & grow)
Preparation is key to
Their Perspective first……
• What do I believe is most important to the other person?
• How do I believe the other person is feeling about the situation?
• How do I believe the other person will respond in the conversation? (e.g. what
• What is the other person’s “communication style” preference? (e.g. does the
individual respond to facts and strictly business, or does the individual prefer some
“human side” before getting to business)
• What will help the other person be open to the conversation?
• What can I learn from the other person?
• What outcome do I need from this conversation?
• How am I feeling about the situation?
• What do I need to convey in the conversation?
• What am I most afraid will happen when I engage in this challenging conversation?
• What would happen if I don’t engage in this challenging conversation?
• How will I kick off the conversation?
• What is important to both of us?
• What is our common ground?
• How can we both make it a happy experience? 22
Different Roles for Different Goals
Operational Results and
Coach for Personal and
Mentor to Share
Mentoring and coaching is much more than just telling the employee what to do.
It requires working with the employees to make decisions, resolve problems and develop skills, altogether.
21. Relationship based on Mutual benefits
Managers set targets to achieve
More concerned with Organisational
Inclined to align with Organisation
vision and Goals
Relationship based on Mutual Trust &
Mentors Guide and support those
More concerned abut Personal & career
Inclined towards sharing experiences &
Replaces the ”I” with “We”
People Mentoring – Lead from within