MULTIGENERATIONAL TEAMS • COACHING MILLENNIALS • FAMILY LIFE CYCLE • REMOTE-BASED COACHING
What we need to know about
generational differences
Coaching Across
Generations
VOLUME 14 • NUMBER 3 • WWW.CHOICE-ONLINE.COM
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VOLUME 14 NUMBER 322
Is there really a difference between generations or is it about different stages of life,
and how do we coach clients from this lens? What are the different generational
needs, expectations, values and conflicts and what is the impact on coaching? What
do you need to know about generational differences in order to build rapport and
effectively work with them? How do you coach leaders to manage and build relation-
ships with team members from different generations? Come along to learn more
about intergenerational challenges presenting themselves in coaching.
Gener
Coaching Across
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VOLUME 14 NUMBER 334
By Susanne Mueller, MA
y 2020, 50 percent of the workforce will be Millenni-
als, according to an article in Forbes magazine (Octo-
ber, 2014). How can we approach that situation as an
effective leadership coach for this generation? They are
ready to be coached, and we are there to discover and em-
power their strengths as well as their weaknesses.
Millennials have been raised by helicopter parents hovering
over them every single moment, making sure nothing goes
wrong, supporting them at all times, giving them instant grat-
ification even if there is nothing to celebrate. Millennials got a
cute sticker for an A grade but also for a B grade; they were
awarded a trophy even if they came in dead last in a competi-
tion. Do we need to celebrate active participation to empower
them? Unfortunately, such celebrations have produced a gen-
eration of people who don’t know their weaknesses. Does that
really help for self-growth, self-awareness or the next step in
their career in the real world? Not so much. In the real world
they don’t get stickers, trophies, or even pats on the back for
every situation or level of effort. Then what?
After listening to a few inspiring TED talks by Millennials,
I have come to the conclusion as a leadership coach for fu-
ture generations that the Millennial leaders are actually the
coolest kids on the block to be coached. They are ready for
very harsh feedback, ready to hear the actual and brutal
truth, ready to learn about their true weaknesses, ready to
fall deep and fail royally; eventually, they will learn how to
get up again. Their negative reputation of being lazy and
impatient, requiring instant gratification and taking all for
granted can actually be a great starting point for the leader-
ship coach who is coaching Millennials.
Being lazy and impatient is the way they are growing and
thinking; when we look at the model of social emotional in-
Coaching
Millennials
Effective leadership for the
‘participation trophy’ generation
B
Feature
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VOLUME 14 NUMBER 3 35
telligence (Goleman, 1995) we focus on self-awareness and
self-management, initially. We learn to see who we are and
what we project to the world. It is about self-discovery, a-ha
moments, relationships and adaptability.
If the parents provide all the services for their children, then
the children get used to being helped at all times and don’t work
on those essential elements for their personal growth and lead-
ership development. How can Millennial leaders learn to make
decisions if their parents do everything for them even before it
comes to the decision making process? Nonetheless, Millenni-
als prefer to be treated like adults, given harsh feedback and
told the truth. This is what leadership coaching for the next
generation should be.
Exciting times are here to be with Millennial leaders who are
willing to learn and change with the guidance of a coach (al-
though not in the role as a parent coach or coach as parent). A
coach can become their sounding board, their personal confi-
dante and their sparring partner. Following are some of the as-
pects involved in coaching Millennials.
Self-awareness & Self-management
Millennials have to learn how to deal with their weaknesses,
listen to their inner signals, and develop self-confidence Self-
confidence seems to be taught at school with all the inflate
and puffed-up rewards that unfortunately will not get them
anywhere. Those stickers are no help at all when facing the
real world. When confronting the reality of a hiring process,
the Millennials’ actual self-confidence is fairly lo .
Social Awareness
Millennials are impatient to grow but are willing to grow
fast, and they have the potential to grow tremendously if
they are in the right environment. They are looking forward
to working within a team where they can contribute. Their
aim is to work well and mainly autonomously.
Daniel Pink (2009) puts high emphasis on fostering a
workspace on ROWE – Result Only Work Environment.
We all know of companies that start in a coffee shop or
other non-traditional work environment where they can
add major value. The traditional 9 to 5 jobs in some areas
are history and the ‘gig economy’ – in which temporary po-
sitions and independent workers are common – means they
will be working on projects rather than fully belonging to
an organization in the traditional sense.“Organizations that
have found inventive, sometimes radical, ways to boost au-
tonomy are outperforming their competitors.” (Pink, 2009)
This new gig economy means definitions of success for Mil-
lennials are not the same as for Baby Boomers. Having a big
house, a fast car and a corner office is not the ideal picture for
them; enjoying more freedom and having autonomy and mean-
ing in a career are much more relevant to that generation.
Relationship Management
Millennials are here to prove that they can lead, grow and
be successful in their own way. Certainly, Steve Jobs’ man-
tra “Love what you do, do what you love” is super impor-
tant. This is about finding a purpose with self-confidence
autonomy and sustainability.
Millennials are the change catalyst for the future. We can
all learn from each other, as mentoring initiatives have
shown. Senior and more experienced resources in the orga-
nization are not afraid to lose their authority when Millen-
nials are teaching them social media. On the contrary, the
relationship has become better and deeper. Millennials are
ready and able to develop others with their social media
knowledge, curiosity and forward-thinking mentality.
1.
Self Awareness
“Know your story and
how it affects you.”
“Make peace with our past.”
“Know your beliefs,
your emotions and your
behavior patterns.”
“Know your
relationship patterns.”
2.
Self Management
“Develop skills for
breathing and relaxation.”
“Learn positive,
self-affirming beliefs.
“Develop self-soothing and
self-motivation skills.”
“Maintain good
physical health.”
3.
Social Awareness
“Understand nonverbal
communication.”
“Develop a positive
view of others.”
“Understand the basic
emotional needs.”
“Understand ‘games’ and
personal integrity.”
4.
Relationship
Management
“Develop skills for reflectiv
listening and empathy.”
“Develop skills for assertive
communication.”
“Learn conflic
resolution skills.”
“Learn skills for support and
affirmation of others.
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VOLUME 14 NUMBER 336
Here are some of the opportunities
for coaching the Millennials:
• Focus on strengths but also on
weaknesses. When looking at a SWOT
(Strength,Weakness,Opportunity,Threat)
analysis for an organization, we certain-
ly look at weaknesses. Why don’t we do
it for a person? If you have a 360 feed-
back report, dig deeper on lower scores;
don’t focus only on the positive points.
Millennials seem to be okay to contem-
plate their weaknesses as opportunities
to learn and grow.
• Provide harsh feedback – Feedback
can be constructive. If Millennials hear
“great job”all the time, this is not neces-
sarily constructive feedback. By the same
token, focusing on negative aspects of
their performance does not mean that
Millennials are bad employees. There is
always room for improvement and op-
portunities to provide creative input. In a
feedback session, the coach should listen
carefully for occasions to strengthen self-
confidence and leadership gaps. Millen-
nials are bursting with possibilities; let’s
unleash their potential fully.
• Let them know it’s okay to fail.
Millennials, with their eagerness, want to
be involved in the decision making pro-
cess and prove that they have a different
voice that should be heard.Listen to their
‘crazy’ ideas. Who would have thought
that a company like Facebook could be
created in a dorm room and be greatly
successful? Crazy ideas are cutting-edge
ideas that might or might not work.
There is always a chance of failure, but if
we don’t try we don’t know. Learning
from mistakes is the key to growth.
Nobody is ever perfect and there will
never be a perfect world. We can only
learn from each other in order to become
more successful in our lives. Collabora-
tion, relationship and leadership go
hand in hand where all generations have
something special to bring to the table.
RESOURCES:
“Three things everyone should know about
millennial leaders,” by Asha Sharma, CMO
of Porch.com, Forbes, October 2014,
(www.forbes.com)
Drive, Daniel Pink, 2009
Emotional Intelligence, Daniel Goleman, 1995
VOLUME 13 NUMBER 112
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