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Anti-Bully presentation for parents

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Publicado el offers free anti bullying workshops for parents, students and teachers. Visit the website for more info or contact Traci Fant CEO directly at

Publicado en: Educación
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Anti-Bully presentation for parents

  2. 2. Bullying is… An intentional written, verbal or physical act, including but not limited to one shown to be motivated by any characteristic such as race, color, religion, ancestry, national origin, gender, sexual orientation, mental or physical disability, or other distinguishing characteristics, when the intentional act: (a) Physically harms a student or damages his/her property (b) Substantially interferes with the student’s education (c) Is so severe, persistent or pervasive that it creates an intimidating or threatening educational environment (d) Or substantially disrupts the orderly operation of a school
  3. 3. Simply stated, bullying… Is intimidating or subjecting a person to hostility or ill treatment . Involves actions which cause another person to feel afraid, humiliated, embarrassed, threatened or shamed. Occurs in a relationship in which there is an imbalance of power. Is repeated over time
  4. 4. Bullying Happens in Five Ways: Verbal: Teasing, jokes, ignoring/isolation, gossip, threats Physical: Blocking someone’s path, physical restraint, pushing/kicking, hazing Sexual: Teasing, touching, slapping, pictures, emails, graffiti, sexual assault Property: Hiding belongings, theft, arson, extortion, vandalism, destruction Online: Cyberbullying is a type of bullying that happens online or through text messages or emails.
  5. 5. Bullying is NOT… A normal childhood activity A rite of passage The target’s fault
  6. 6. Differentiating Bullying from Normal Peer Conflict/Mean Behavior: Normal conflict/mean behavior Equal power or are friends Happens occasionally Accidental Not serious Equal emotional reaction Not seeking power Remorse-will take responsibility Effort to solve the problem Bullying Imbalance of power Repeated negative actions Intentional Physical or emotional harm Unequal emotional reaction Seeking control/material things No remorse-blames target No effort to solve the problem
  7. 7. For the target, bullying is a “loss” experience. LOSS of safety LOSS of self-esteem LOSS of belonging LOSS of control over their own life
  8. 8. Effects of Bullying on the Target: Physical Effects Stomach aches Weight loss/gain Headaches Drop in grades Drug or alcohol use Sexual activity Physical aggression Suicidal Homicidal Emotional Effects Alienation Low self-esteem Insecurity FEAR Depression Withdrawn Aggression Anger Vengeful
  9. 9. Warning Signs that your child may be the target of bullies: Frequently teased, taunted belittled, ridiculed, intimidated, threatened, dominated or subdued Has a derogatory nickname Regularly has bruises or injuries that can’t be explained Has belongings taken or damaged Few or no close friends at school
  10. 10. MORE Warning Signs: Frequently socially isolated Less assertive or lacks the skills to respond to others’ teasing or Harassment Appears weak or easily dominated Tries to stay close to a teacher or other adult at recess or breaks Talk with your child about bullying!
  11. 11. What To Do if you suspect your child is being bullied: Talk with your child If your child is being bullied, they need to have a voice in how the situation is handled. Contact the school Set up a meeting with your child’s teacher(s) or counselor. Consider including the school resource officer if applicable. Develop a plan for keeping your child safe, particularly during vulnerable times (class breaks, lunch, recess). Find out what activities or counseling options are available for your child. Contact police or school resource officer if the actions are: criminal (assault, theft, serious threats, vandalism
  12. 12. Recommendations if you suspect your child is being bullied: Don’t encourage your child to fight back— two wrongs don’t make a right! Listen to your child, do not ignore your child’s plea for help. Don’t confront the parents or the other child directly. Avoid bringing your child and the bully together to elicit an apology or resolve the issue.
  13. 13. What about the bully? Studies show that children identified as bullies by age 8 are six times more likely to be convicted of a crime by age 24. 60% of kids characterized as bullies in the 6th-9th grade had at least one criminal conviction by age 24. Bullies are five times more likely to end up with a serious criminal record by age 30.
  14. 14. Contributing Factors Associated with Bullying: Family Factors Lack of attention and warmth Modeling of aggressive behavior at home Poor supervision Individual Factors Active, impulsive personality Lack of empathy for others Craves attention and approval from others School School climate is perceived as uncaring or indifferent Teachers/staff unaware or unclear of bullying definitions or how to respond
  15. 15. What motivates a bully? Bullies prey on an imbalance of power. They may be seeking attention. They need to make themselves feel more important. They need a particular reaction from the other members of the group. Bullies believe their behavior is exciting and makes them more popular.
  16. 16. What motivates a bully? They may be coping with a loss. They may have an active and impulsive temperament. They may be victims of bullying/abuse. They may see violence modeled at home or elsewhere in their lives. They may have low self-esteem.
  17. 17. Warning Signs that your child may be bullying others: Frequent name-calling Regular bragging A need to always get his/her own way Spending more time with younger or less powerful kids A lack of empathy for others A defiant or hostile attitude, easily takes offense Frequent misbehavior at school
  18. 18. What To Do if you suspect your child may be bullying others: Talk with your child Never condone bullying behavior; speak up and tell your child that the behavior they are engaging in is considered bullying. Encourage empathy for others Remind your child that everyone has a right to be themselves, to choose their own friends and to feel safe at school. Review consequences of bullying behavior Both discipline consequences and relationship consequences Reinforce respectful behaviors at home Help your child deal with feelings in positive ways Contact the school for help Set up a meeting with your child’s teacher(s) or counselor. Develop a plan for change.
  19. 19. School Interventions/Consequences for Bullying: Warning Verbal and written Permanently documented Coaching/Intervention Anger Management, Conflict Resolution/ Communication/ Problem Solving Skills, Diversity Training during school or before, during, or after school detention. May be provided by administrators, teachers, counselors, school psychologists, or school resource officers Suspension/Expulsion Referral to Law Enforcement (if applicable)
  20. 20. What is Cyber bullying? Cyber bullying- a means of using online resources to tease, humiliate, embarrass, harass, and intimidate people on the Internet. Cyber bullying is a serious social problem that needs to be addressed by parents. Remember just because it happens on the Internet does not diminish the destructive impact it has on children.
  21. 21. Few examples of Cyber Bullying: A threatening e-mail , nasty Instant Messages Repeated notes sent to the cell phone A website set up to mock others “Borrowing” someone’s screen name and pretending to be them while posting a message Forwarding supposedly private messages, pictures, or video to others. Posting derogatory videos and pictures online
  22. 22. Why do kids cyber bully each other? Cyber bullying is often motivated by frustration, anger, revenge or entertainment. Most kids who cyber bully don’t think it is a big deal because it occurs online. Many kids mistakenly believe that because the communication is online that is harmless, funny and that they will never get caught. Many students do not think about the consequences of their actions. They don’t think in terms of how their actions may affect themselves or others in the future.
  23. 23. Possible consequences of cyber bullying: The impact on a child’s psyche can be enormous. They get the feeling that their life is ruined, that their reputation is destroyed forever and that they will have to live with the defamation for the rest of their lives.
  24. 24. How do you know if someone is being cyberbullied? Here are some signs to look out for: Long hours on the computer Is secretive about Internet activities Behavioral changes Won't say who they are talking to May find unexplained pictures on computer Trouble sleeping Stomach and headaches, lack of appetite, throwing up Fear of going to out of the house Crying for no apparent reason Lack of interest at social events that include other students Complains of illness before school or community events often Change in attitude, dress or habits Unexplained broken personal possessions, loss of money Stories that don't seem to make sense Acting out aggression at home Teach your child to communicate. If an adult or a child someone is being cyber bullied, do not accept the bullying behavior as a problem your child has to live with. The bullying behavior is the responsibility of the bully, not the child being bullied
  25. 25. What should you as a parent do if your child is cyberbullied? : Inform the school principal or teacher if the bullying is school related. Save all messages for evidence. Inform police if threatened with harm. Stress to your kids that what is written on the Internet is on there permanently!!
  26. 26. What can parents do to help their child? Be an advocate for your child. Teach your child to be an advocate for him/herself. Know your kids passwords. Look for any changes in behavior. Monitor your child’s computer use. Establish an AUP contract for online use.
  27. 27. How to approach the school: Every school should have a very specific policy on dealing with bullying. The school’s anti-bullying policy should state who your first point of contact should be. Telephone the school and request an appointment with the appropriate person or the Principal. Have your facts prepared; Names of children involved and of witnesses. Your son/daughter may not be the only one being bullied The nature of the incident/s Dates, times and locations of incidents At the meeting: Ask to have the incident investigated. Ask what support the school can offer your son/daughter, e.g. counseling or supervised mediation between the parties if appropriate. What action will be taken to protect your child from retaliation?
  28. 28. Please visit the website for more info about workshops or to make a donation towards our efforts. Visit these additional websites for Bully Resources: sponsored site: Resources to keep your kids safe= Help in a bullying situation= If someone you know is being bullied or is bullying others= Cyber bullying info= Someone you know is being bullied or is bullying others Bully policies and report by state=