Facebook for Parents: Parenting across Social Media

1. Facebook for Parents Parenting Across Social Media Monday, November 9th Winchester Public Library

2. Introduction Hi! I’m Amelia Peloquin and I work as a technology consultant for libraries, nonprofits and small businesses. My areas of focus include budget-friendly web design, training and support, social media marketing and project management. Find me at: TechWithoutWalls.com

3. Please Note: For your reference, this slide presentation, associated handouts & links are available here: http://facebook.techwithoutwalls.com

4. Kids are Connected Social media is omnipresent, and the majority of teens have an account on Facebook, MySpace, or Twitter. Teens are also spending lots of time texting and using the Internet with cell phones and other mobile devices (iPod touch, psp, etc.)

5. Patterns of Use Source: Cox Communications May 2009 Teen Online & Wireless Safety Surveyhttp://www.cox.com/takecharge/safe_teens_2009/media/2009_teen_survey_internet_and_wireless_safety.pdf

6. Concerns for Parents

7. Age-Appropriate Internet Use Mainstream social sites like Facebook require users to be 13+ but it’s easy to lie about age. Many parenting experts think teens are too young to use these sites safely—parental guidance is recommended! Seek kid-friendly sites (Club Penguin, Webkins) for younger children.

8. Objectionable Content + Peers Hate groups Pro-anorexia groups

9. Cyberbullying: abusive behavior among peers that is perpetrated through electronic means (cell phones, social network sites, Instant Messenger, etc.)

10. Sexting & Other inappropriate photos/videos (i.e. drug/alcohol use) Source: Cox Communications May 2009 Teen Online & Wireless Safety Surveyhttp://www.cox.com/takecharge/safe_teens_2009/media/2009_teen_survey_internet_and_wireless_safety.pdf

11. Predators & Other Creeps Can be overblown in the media, but stranger danger is real. (That being said, kids are more likely to be bullied/harassed online by someone they know in person.)

12. Phishing, ID Theft, Viruses/Spyware Many kids don’t know the basics about protecting your computer, email & other accounts. It can be easy to get tricked into giving up personal info. Most ads for “free” music downloads, ringtones, personality tests, etc are scams.

13. Deceptive Ads

14. Cyberbullying

16. Spreading embarrassing photos or video

17. Sharing secrets without permission

18. spreading rumors online

21. Creating a fake account online to impersonate/ridicule a peer

22. Creating or forwarding a YouTube video about someone

24. Stop it before it starts Talk to your child about ethical and responsible online behavior Set expectations for appropriate use of Internet & mobile devices Help your child recognize harassment and know what to do if victimized by peers online

25. Know how to address the issue Know how to block cyberbullies on Facebook/MySpace/Twitter (see “Locking it Down” handout) Know how to report abusive content on social networking sites and photo/video sharing sites Consider talking to teachers and school administrators.

26. Parenting Connected Kids

27. General Advice for All Ages Understand what kids are doing online Know the risks and decide what’s appropriate Communicate your expectations with your child Be present!

28. Parents of Young Children Talk about basic online safety Don’t talk to strangers online Don’t share passwords with anyone except parents Don’t share personal info like address, phone number, or name of school

29. Parents of Young Children Create a “fenced-in” online space Use web browsers designed specifically for kids Limit social networking to age-appropriate sites like Club Penguin or Webkinz

30. Parents of Young Children Actively supervise your child’s Internet use If you can’t sit and supervise, consider parental control options: OS-based parental controls Filtering home network traffic with Open DNS Filtering/monitoring software options

31. Parents of Middle Schoolers Review Internet Safety basics Set specific guidelines and rules Don’t fill out forms from ads; “free” offers are usually scams Peer-to-peer software like Limewire generally leads to spyware and viruses

32. Parents of Middle Schoolers On social sites like Facebook and MySpace No Strangers & don’t share personal info Set strict privacy settings! The default privacy settings on these sites are not private at all. Be a part of their online social network Know how to block harassing users & report abusive/inappropriate material

33. Discuss public vs. private and consequences of inappropriate use Despite privacy controls, nothing posted online is ever really private Emails/IMs can be cut and pasted Embarrassing/Inappropriate photos and video can be easily forwarded to other people

34. Talk about Cyberbullying Know how to recognize and respond to incidents of cyberbullying Block users & report abuse Don’t retaliate Promote responsible technology use Talk about ethical and responsible online behavior Set ground rules and expectations

35. Parents of Older Teens

36. Parents of Older Teens Ask to see their sites— they’re still under your roof. Reality check: If they’re posting photos & info they don’t want parents to see, they probably shouldn’t be posting it online in the first place.

37. Parents of Older Teens Discuss Online Reputation Potential long-term consequences of inappropriate material on the internet: college admissions, future employment opportunities, etc…

38. College and Beyond Although Facebook has gained popularity with older users over the last two years, many young people see the social web as “theirs.” Across our culture, we’re experiencing a lot of awkwardness and boundary issues.

40. Parental Control Options

41. Parental Control Options Parental controls within Windows and Mac OS Home Network controls with Open DNS Special browsers for young children Filtering/Monitoring Software (?)

42. Parental Control Options Parental controls within Windows and Mac OS Current versions of operating systems allow you to set up accounts with limited access to administrative functions. This is a good way to protect your computer as well as your kid from viruses and other malware See tutorial links at http://facebook.techwithoutwalls.com

43. Parental Control Options Filtering content at the home network level with Open DNS Better than pc-based filtering software, but can be difficult to set up for parents who aren’t tech-savvy. An incomplete solution: kids go online away from home and on mobile devices, too. Intellectual freedom & censorship issues: as a librarian, I personally don’t like filters.

44. Parental Control Options PC-Based Filtering & Monitoring Software Good to consider if there’s been inappropriate behavior & repeated violations of trust Can be Problematic Kids use the Internet away from home + on mobiles Can block access to legitimate sites Tech-savvy teens can circumvent it Using spy software can be detrimental to your relationship with your teen

45. In Conclusion Educate yourself as best as you can. Decide what you consider age-appropriate + set limits/boundaries accordingly. Be present and involved. Find what works for your family.

46. Questions/Comments? Feedback? I’d love to know what you think of this workshop! Please fill out the (brief!) feedback survey at http://facebook.techwithoutwalls.com or email me at: amelia@techwithoutwalls.com