2. Be it your personal or professional life,
being assertive can help you build and
maintain self-confidence in all situations.
However, assertiveness doesn't come
naturally to everyone and most people
have to learn this skill through the life
experiences. Assertiveness is not just
about speaking your mind, but it is also
about how you speak your mind.
3. It is about expressing your feelings,
opinions and thoughts without being
disrespectful to others and without
hesitation. In simple words, assertiveness
means, asking confidently for what you
want whilst being able to politely say no to
what you do not want.
4. Why should you be assertive?
Honesty and mutual respect are two key
elements that help sustain long-term
relationships. By being assertive, you are
respectful of yourself as well as the person
you are speaking with. On the other hand,
lack of assertiveness may lead to various
negative consequences, such as emotional
withdrawal, resentment and eventually loss
of relationship.
5. Basically, there are three communication
styles; passive which means you keep
your feelings and thoughts to yourself
and don't express yourself easily; and
aggressive which means screaming or
yelling at others to make a point.
Assertiveness is a midpoint between
being passive and being aggressive.
6. How to be assertive in your relationship
First, you have to work on building your self-
confidence. Remind yourself of all your
positive qualities and capabilities so you do
not feel like you don't deserve a voice.
Ask yourself how should you handle the
situation, which is completely different from
how you feel like dealing with it. Look for the
best way to express yourself and remember,
you do not have to necessarily sugarcoat
what you want to say.
7. Try to focus on “I” statements instead of
“you”, because usually the more times one
says “You”, the more defensive other
person becomes. For instance, 'I am upset
because I was expecting you for dinner',
vs., 'You are not reliable'.
Deal with the issue immediately rather than
allowing the frustration to build. If you wait
too long, it can escalate emotions and
spark heated response.
8. Don't bring up the past, and focus on only
one issue at a time. It’s not a good idea to
overwhelm the other person with many
issues all at once.
For more such helpful tips and advice on
relationships, please visit
http://goo.gl/JEBzO
Fit4Success Team
Melina
