49. The Seven Primary Principles of Parenting Wrong a. Bring up each child in precisely the same way. b. Inadvertently reinforce maladaptive behavior. c. You cannot, not attend to maladaptive behavior, because of problems in yourself. d. Children imitate maladaptive behavior you reinforce. e. The child reinforces your nagging by eventually complying. f. The desperate struggle to conserve energy makes you give up. g. Couples polarize on discipline etc. as a reenactment of unresolved problems from the childhood. Right a. Provide needs according to the child's blueprint. b. Reinforce, with attention, the behavior you want. c. Resolve your problems so you know why you are not able to discipline your attention to desirable behavior. d. Reinforce, with your attention, the child who is exhibiting the behavior you desire and the others will follow. e. Request a child do something once only. Commend them if they do; ignore them if they don't. f. It is worth the extra effort because eventually it will save you a great deal of time and energy. g. Understand your unresolved problems with insight and, by practice, engage in the behavior that is most beneficial to you all.