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How To Detach
From Outcome
One of the pieces of advice often given
to guys who want to do better with
girls is to "detach from outcome."
This is pretty good advice for pretty
much any kind of performance.
If you're too worried about the results,
the additional stress and anxiety will
mess up your behavior.
Paradoxically, the less you're
concerned with the outcome, the
more likely you are to achieve it.
However, this is one of those catch-
22's.
It's nearly impossible to detach from
the outcome if you don't have any
experience in getting it.
For example, if you've never gotten a
phone number from a girl, and you ask
somebody, it's going to be very, very
hard not to be nervous.
On the other hand, if you've gotten
hundreds of numbers, it's a lot easier
to not care too much if the girl you're
currently talking to is going to give you
her number.
It seems that in order to detach from
the outcome, you first have to achieve
the outcome a bunch of times.
It doesn't take much to see this can
quickly turn into a recursive loop of
insanity, keeping you stuck over in the
shadows, while all the other guys are
having all the fun.
What's the answer?
Instead of detaching all the way from
the outcome, simply pull back a bit.
For example, if you want to get the
number, set that as your intention, and
then forget it.
Then consciously think of all the things
you would need to do anyway, to get
the number, and focus on those.
Like walking up to her, talking to her,
making her smile and laugh.
Lose yourself fully in the process.
Enjoy the process.
Make that your "intermediary
outcome."
See your main outcome of getting her
number as comprised of a bunch of
intermediary outcomes right after
another.
If you are terrified of talking to her,
focus on just walking up.
Enjoy that process.
Do it a few times until you build up a
memory of getting that outcome, and
then move on to the next.
Walk up and say hi, and then go
somewhere else.
Once you've got plenty of THAT
experience, start an actual
conversation.
Sounds like a long time, right?
Well, consider this.
Most normal guys NEVER get much
better at talking to girls than they were
in high school.
They may find themselves DECADES
later still struggling with the same
issues.
If you took your time, planned on a
few months of just pure practice, and
forgot about any outcome, you'd
improve a LOT quicker.
mindpersuasion.com/girlfriend-generator/

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