Good relationships can be the difference between outstanding success and dismal failure. It’s about getting people to trust you so that they will deliver what you need at the right time in the right way.
This presentation goes beyond classrooms and books—the mechanics of project management—to explore the varied and diverse makeup of relationships—the foundation of project success. Our journey begins with setting expectations upfront with your team by Establishing a Relationship Culture. We’ll then move onto Getting Personal and learning the importance of building true interest in people. We’ll then stop to focus on Power of Networking and the tools available to help you build and maintain a strong, long-term network of relationships with others. Finally, we’ll pull it all together and examine the truth behind Good Relationships Are Key to Success.
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Relationships-The Foundation of Project Management
1. Relationships The Foundation of Project Success June 18, 2009 Presented by Raymond Grogan P roject M anagement C ommunity O f P ractice
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Editor's Notes
OVERVIEW: Lori to introduce Raymond TRANSITION : Raymond pickup with Slide 3 Purpose and Objectives
OVERVIEW: Good relationships can be the difference between outstanding success and dismal failure. It’s about getting people to trust you so that they will deliver what you need at the right time in the right way. This presentation goes beyond classrooms and books— the mechanics of project management —to explore the varied and diverse makeup of relationships— the foundation of project success. Our journey begins with setting expectations upfront with your team by Establishing a Relationship Culture. We’ll then move onto Getting Personal and learning the importance of building true interest in people. We’ll then stop to focus on Power of Networking and the tools available to help you build and maintain a strong, long-term network of relationships with others. Finally, we’ll pull it all together and examine the truth behind Good Relationships Are Key to Success . TRANSITION : Let’s now move on to Slide 4 and explore the Value of Relationship Cultures.
DISCUSSION: Let’s stop for a moment and take a quick audience poll. Question is: What do you think of most when you hear the term: “Relationship Culture?” From the three available responses, please take 30 seconds and select only one response. After 30 seconds have passed, display the results and note the numbers for each. State: Regardless of the selections made, all are correct and just as important as the other; however, today we’re going to focus on C. and talk about Healthy Group Norms and the value the team places on these norms. TRANSITION : Let’s now move onto Slide 5 and discuss the “Value of a Relationship Culture.”
DISCUSSION: The first part of our relationship journey focuses on Establishing a Culture of Relationships. The importance of establishing a culture or group norm that promotes growth within the team, upfront, cannot be overlooked if a PM is to be successful. So, what is a relationship culture? It is defined as a group norm, established up-front with feedback from the team, that promotes and encourages a “healthy” team relationship. What is the value to the team? Solidifying the team’s core value system Building respect & trust amongst its members Developing a sense of community within the team Winning the hearts and minds of customers, suppliers, staff and others… Given the team an edge both in performance and in attracting good quality members TRANSITION : Let’s now move onto establishing expectations upfront with Slide 6.
DISCUSSION: A healthy culture includes (often unspoken) expectations about the way things are done. In a project team these can be about such things as how members: Respond to inquiries How they greet each other How they behave when the pressure is on. It's about treating people with respect and listening to their point of view. You may not agree, but it does mean you respect their right to think differently & express their views. TRANSITION : Let’s now move onto Slide 7 and talk about the role of the leader in establishing a relationship culture.
DISSCUSION: Cultures need leaders to set expectations and offer guidance on what's important. As a project manager you will need to be aware that people are watching you for clues as to how to behave in relationships with others. Actions speak louder than words. TRANSITION: So, how do we (as leaders) create a culture for playing well with others? Let’s talk about “Setting Ground Rules” on Slide 8.
DISCUSSION: You can submarine your career and work relationships by the actions you take and the behaviors you exhibit at work. No matter your education, your experience, or your title, if you can't play well with others, you will never accomplish your work mission. Effective work relationships form the cornerstone for success and satisfaction with your job and your career. How important are effective work relationships? Effective work relationships form the basis for promotion, pay increases, goal accomplishment, and job satisfaction. These are the top eight ways you can play well with others at work. They form the basis for effective work relationships. These are the actions you want to take to create a positive, empowering, motivational work environment for people. 1. Bring suggested solutions with the problems to the meeting table. Some employees spend an inordinate amount of time identifying problems. Honestly? That's the easy part. Thoughtful solutions are the challenge that will earn respect and admiration from coworkers and bosses 2. Don't ever play the blame game. You alienate coworkers, supervisors, and reporting staff. Yes, you may need to identify who was involved in a problem. You may even ask the Deming question: what about the work system caused the employee to fail? But, not my fault and publicly identifying and blaming others for failures will earn enemies. These enemies will, in turn, help you to fail. You do need allies at work. 3. Your verbal and nonverbal communication matters. If you talk down to another employee, use sarcasm, or sound nasty, the other employee hears you. We are all radar machines that constantly scope out our environment. In one organization a high level manager said to me, "I know you don't think I should scream at my employees. But, sometimes, they make me so mad. When is it appropriate for me to scream at the employees?" Answer? Never, of course, if respect for people is a hallmark of your organization. 4. Be transparent, never blind side a coworker, boss, or reporting staff person. If the first time a coworker hears about a problem is in a staff meeting or from an email sent to his supervisor, you have blind sided the coworker. Always discuss problems, first, with the people directly involved who "own" the work system. Also called lynching or ambushing your coworkers, you will never build effective work alliances unless your coworkers trust you. And, without alliances, you never accomplish the most important goals. This is especially important now, given changes underway with Wells Fargo acquisition. 5. Keep your commitments. In an organization, work is interconnected. If you fail to meet deadlines and commitments, you affect the work of other employees. Always keep commitments, and if you can't, make sure all affected employees know what happened. Provide a new due date and make every possible effort to honor the new deadline. 6. Share credit for accomplishments, ideas, and contributions. How often do you accomplish a goal or complete a project with no help from others? If you are a manager, how many of the great ideas you promote were contributed by staff members? Take the time, and expend the energy, to thank, reward, recognize and specify contributions of the people who help you succeed. This is a no-fail approach to building effective work relationships. 7. Help others find their greatness. Every employee in your organization has talents, skills, and experience. If you can help fellow employees harness their best abilities, you benefit the organization immeasurably. The growth of individual employees benefits the whole. Compliment, recognize, praise, and notice contributions. You don't have to be a manager to help create a positive, motivating environment for employees. In this environment, employees do find and contribute their greatness. 8: Encourage meaningful conflict . Conflict avoidance is most frequently the topic when conflict in organizations is discussed. Conflict resolution - as quickly as possible - is the second most frequent topic. This is bad news because meaningful work conflict is a cornerstone in healthy, successful organizations. Conflict is necessary for effective problem solving and for effective interpersonal relationships. TRANSITION : Let’s move onto Slide 9 and go over six tips for encouraging meaningful conflict with others.
DISCUSSION: There are many reasons why people don't stand up for their beliefs and bring important differences to the table. (In organizations, this translates into people nodding in unison when the manager asks if the group agrees, but then complaining about the decision later.) Conflict is usually uncomfortable. Many people don't know how to participate in and manage work conflict in a positive way. In poorly carried-out conflict interactions, people sometimes get hurt. They become defensive because they feel under attack personally. People have to work with certain people every single day, so they are afraid conflict will harm these necessary ongoing relationships. Effectively managed work conflict has many positive results for your organization, however. When people can disagree with each other and lobby for different ideas, your organization is healthier. Disagreements often result in a more thorough study of options and better decisions and direction. According to Peter Block, in The Empowered Manager: Positive Political Skills at Work , if you are unwilling to participate in organizational politics and conflict, you will never accomplish the things that are important to you at work, your work mission. And, that would be tragic. 1. Create a work environment in which healthy conflict is encouraged by setting clear expectations. Foster an organizational culture or environment in which differences of opinion are encouraged. Make differences the expectation and healthy debate about issues and ideas the norm. Placing emphasis on the common goals people share within your organization can help. People have a tendency to focus on the differences experienced with another rather than focusing on the beliefs and goals they have in common with each other. If organizational goals are aligned and all employees are moving in the same direction, healthy work conflict about how to get there is respected. If you are a manager or team leader, do this by asking others to express their opinion before you speak your own. Tell people that you want them to speak up when they disagree or have an opinion that is different from others in the group. 2. Reward, recognize, and thank people who are willing to take a stand and support their position. You can publicly thank people who are willing to disagree with the direction of a group. Your recognition system, bonus system, pay and benefits package, and performance management process should all reward the employees who practice personal organizational courage and pursue appropriate work conflict. These employees speak up to disagree or propose a different approach even in the face of pressure from the group to agree. They lobby passionately for their cause or belief, yet, when all the debating is over, they support the decisions made by the team just as passionately. 3. Expect people to support their opinions and recommendations with data and facts. Divergent opinions are encouraged, but the opinions are arrived at through the study of data and facts. Staff members are encouraged to collect data that will illuminate the process or problem. TRANSITION : Let’s move onto Slide 10 and talk about the remaining 3 tips for encouraging meaningful conflict with others.
DISCUSSION: 4. Create a group norm that conflict around ideas and direction is expected and that personal attacks are not tolerated. Any group that comes together regularly to lead an organization or department, solve a problem, or to improve or create a process would benefit from group norms. These are the relationship guidelines or rules group members agree to follow. They often include the expectation that all members will speak honestly, that all opinions are equal, and that each person will participate. These guidelines also set up the expectation that personal attacks are not tolerated whereas healthy debate about ideas and options is encouraged. 5. Look for signs that a conflict about a solution or direction is getting out of hand. Exercise your best observation skills and notice whether tension is becoming unhealthy. Listen for criticism of fellow staff members, an increase in the number and severity of "digs" or putdowns, and negative comments about the solution or process. Are secret meetings increasing? 6. If you are using all of the first 5 tips, and healthy work conflict is not occurring ... You need to sit down with the people on your team and ask them why. Some positive, problem solving discussion might allow your group to identify and rectify any problem that stands in the way of open, healthy, positive, constructive work conflict and debate. The future success of your project depends upon your team’s willingness to participate in healthy work conflict, so this discussion is worth your time. TRANSITION : Let’s now move onto to Slide 11 and take a quick audience poll on Conflict.
DISCUSSION: Let’s stop for a moment and take another quick audience poll. Question is: When faced with conflict, how do you tend to respond? From the three available responses, please take 30 seconds and select only one response. After 30 seconds have passed, display the results and note the numbers for each. State: Each of us are unique in the way we choose to respond to conflict and for the most of us, response B is the one most often experienced because, as with most any stressor in our life, can cause fear and anxiety when it comes up. TRANSITION : Let’s now move onto Slide 12 and talk about how we can overcome our fear of conflict.
DISCUSSION: Are you guilty of holding mental conflicts and confrontations? Many people are uncomfortable when it comes to confrontation. We all pretty much understand the concept of having a conversation in your head; so you can plan out what you want to say and how you want to say it. Sometimes these mental conversations are enough to settle the issue, as you realize you are making too much out of a simple situation. We’ve all spent hours lying in bed at night having conversations with people with whom we were angry and/or frustrated. Not only does this practice disrupt a person’s sleep, attitude and health, it never really resolves the issue, and is potentially damaging to your relationships. Don't get me wrong, I don't believe that you need to confront every action. If you have the conversation once in your head, don't worry about it. If it comes back and you have it again, perhaps start thinking about holding a real conversation. By the third "in your head" confrontation, you need to start planning how you will deal with the real confrontation, because it looks as if you are going to need to do that. How to Hold a Real, Necessary Conflict or Confrontation Start by preparing yourself to confront the real issue. Be able to state the issue in one (or two), non-emotional, factual based sentences. For example, assume you want to confront your coworker for taking all of the credit for the work that the two of you did together on a project. Instead of saying, "You took all the credit, blah, blah, blah..." and venting your frustration, which is what you might say in your mind, rephrase your approach using the above guidelines. Say instead, "It looks as if I played no role in the Johnson account. My name does not appear anywhere on the document, nor I have been given credit anywhere that I can see." (I've used additional communication techniques such as "I" language as well in this statement. Notice that I avoided using the words "I feel" because that is an emotional statement, without proof and facts. The facts in this statement cannot be disputed, but an "I feel" statement is easy for your coworker to refute.) Make your initial statement and stop talking. When the person you are confronting responds, allow them to respond. It's a human tendency, but don't make the mistake of adding to your initial statement, to further justify the statement. Defending why you feel the way you do will generally just create an argument. Say what you want to say (the confrontation), then just allow the other person to respond. Especially since you've probably held the conversation in your head a few times, you may think you "know" how the other person is going to respond. But, it's a mistake to jump to that point before they have the opportunity to respond. Resist the temptation to say anything else at this point. Let them respond. Avoid arguing during the confrontation. Confrontation does not mean fight. It means: state what you have say. Listen to what they have to say. Many times it actually ends right there. Do you need to prove the other person right or wrong? Does someone have to take blame? Get your frustration off your chest, and move on. Focus on the real issue of the confrontation. The other party will either agree or disagree. Keep to the issue at this point, and avoid all temptation to get into an argument. Negotiate, but don't fight. The issue is you aren't receiving credit, and you want your name on the documentation. That's it. It isn't about blame, about who is right or wrong or anything other than your desired resolution. You will rarely look forward to confrontation; you may never become completely comfortable with, or even skilled in, confrontation. However, it is important that you say something when you are frustrated and angry. If you can't stand up for yourself, who will? TRANSITION : This sums up our discussion on building and sustaining a relationship culture. We’ll now move onto Slide 13 and pickup with Getting Personal.
DISCUSSION: In James Hynes' novel, Kings of Infinite Space , the main character comes to the realization that there are zombies -- actual, soulless zombies -- lurking around his office. For many employees, at least for many of those in unhealthy workplaces, this feeling might be familiar. There are numerous workplaces in which relationships are often characterized by utter indifference -- or, worse, jealousy, mistrust, and outright animosity. Many people may consider strong personal relationships unimportant in the workplace. But the Employee Engagement Index results suggest that these relationships hold a key to employee engagement. When employees were asked to consider their workplace relationships with their managers, the survey results revealed sharp differences between how engaged and actively disengaged employees feel. While 16% of engaged employees strongly agree with the statement "This person and I have one of the strongest personal relationships in my life," only 4% of not-engaged employees and 1% of actively disengaged employees strongly agree. TRANSITION: Let’s continue our discussion around negative workplace relationships and their impact on employee engagement on slide 14.
DISCUSSION: Negative workplace relationships may be a big part of why so many American employees are not engaged with their jobs. The Gallup Management Journal's semi-annual Employee Engagement Index puts the current percentage of truly "engaged" employees at 29%. A slim majority, 54%, falls into the "not engaged" category, while 17% of employees are "actively disengaged." (See sidebar on "The Three Types of Employees.") Despite efforts to keep the personal and professional realms separate, it's becoming increasingly apparent that workplace relationships are personal and that negative relationship dynamics have far-reaching and long-term consequences for organizations. People don't become soulless zombies when they arrive at the workplace. And attempts to force them to act that way are likely to lead to a less engaged workforce. TRANSITION: The question is: “How do we help our people feel more “truly engaged?” The answer can be found on our next slide 15.
DISCUSSION: Building good relationships centers around being truly interested in the people you deal with, both from a business and personal view. While discussing business issues is usually the main purpose of speaking with someone, finding out something personal about them takes the relationship to the next level. Learning about hobbies, special interests, family, accomplishments, leisure time activities, organization memberships, and special dates such as birthdays will help you make a deeper connection with them. Be respectful of diverse cultures. In some cultures, it may not be appropriate to make a deeper connection as quickly as in other cultures. Use an example of my relationships with Annie, a Latina. TRANSITION: Let’s move onto Slide 16 and wrap up how we can make a deeper connection with our people.
DISCUSSION: The important thing is what you do with the information. When dealing with team members, suppliers, clients and stakeholders try to mix personal information in the conversation. Every contact doesn't have to be about business. It's about peeling away the layers of formality and resistance to improve your chances of achieving what you want to achieve from the interaction. Making a deeper connection is especially important now given Wells Fargo and Wachovia integration activities. Think about the cultural differences that exist between our two companies. Examples include: time differences (west coast vs. east coast) when planning meetings, sharing something personal during conversations, emailing pictures of one another so that both will have a face with a name, etc. TRANSITION: This concludes the section on Getting Personal. Let’s move on to Slide 17 and take another audience poll on Networking.
DISCUSSION: Let’s stop for a moment and take another quick audience poll. Statement is: “The type of networking I use most often is:”. From the four available responses, please take 30 seconds and select only one response. After 30 seconds have passed, display the results and note the numbers for each. State: As the numbers show, we all tend to use one form of networking over another based on what worked for us in the past. TRANSITION : We invite you now to consider there are many types of and opportunities for networking available to us today—particularly given the recent explosion of networking on the Internet. Let’s explore the Power of Networking and the options available to us on Slide 18.
DISCUSSION: What is this Networking thing? Just how important is it to a Project Manager and his or her continued success? Making a connection with people on subjects you have a genuine interest will grow their confidence in you. Use this connection to engage them and then ask genuine questions and just listen. They'll often tell you what you need to know. Strong bonds will inevitably stem from commonalities discovered in simple conversation. TRANSITION: Let’s move onto Slide 19 and talk a little about how we make the connection
DISCUSSION: It can’t be expressed enough that networking requires good skills in creating rapport which, quite simply, is the result of good listening skills. True listening is more of an art form that’s learned over time. It requires a unique ability to use all of your senses; listening not only for the facts, but for the feelings or emotions behind what is being said. A good listener will pay particular attention to non-verbals—things that are not said, but clearly come across in the communication; e.g., raised eyebrows, smiling/frowning, change in tone, being quiet or speaking quickly. Bottom-line, the use of good listening skills is crucial when making a connection with someone. Wisdom in a nutshell: Networking is essential for both new jobs and business contracts. Effective networking helps you find hidden opportunities and can set you apart from others. An indirect approach is better than a direct one. Use someone you know to introduce you to your target contact. Never go straight to your target without a go-between who will put in a good word for you. You can overcome your natural shyness, your fear of using people, and your fear of rejection. TRANSITION: Now that we’ve shared some networking wisdom lets’ move onto Slide 20 and look at three key techniques you can employ now.
DISCUSSION: Building your network is an ongoing and active process. Look for every opportunity to engage and connect with others at all times. Three key techniques you should use include: 1) You need to increase your range of contacts constantly— the longer the list, the better . 2) Build a network of partners to keep an open eye and ear for new opportunities for you. 3) Reach targeted individuals in two ways: directly or indirectly. Build visibility by raising your profile. Go to every social gathering you possibly can. Join a business association relevant to your industry; e.g., Chamber of Commerce. And finally, be visible without really trying TRANSITION: Now that we’ve introduced three key techniques available for networking, let’s move onto Slide 21 and expand on being visible without really trying.
DISCUSSION: How to be visible without really trying while networking: Ask a question at a conference. Make a point in a meeting. Write letters to your industry magazine or blog. Introduce yourself to lots of people at an industry show or ball. Discuss a book with an industry leader. Wear brightly colored clothes such as a tie that clashes. Make people laugh. Have an opinion on everything—but keep an open mind. Hand out an unusual business card. Take up an unusual hobby - but not too unusual. And, most important of all, don’t overlook using technologies available to us through email and on-line professional networking. TRANSITION: Speaking of technology let’s move onto Slide 22 and explore what options are available to us online.
DISCUSSION: The next set of Slides focuses on Tools for Networking on the Internet. You’ll find a variety of critical online career networking resources for anyone of all ages and experience. TRANSITION: Let’s move onto Slide 23 and continue our discussion of other types of online networking sites.
DISCUSSION: This Slide provides additional information about discussion groups/boards available on line. TRANSITION: This wraps up our discussion on the Power of Networking. Let’s move onto Slide 25 and sum up everything we’ve discussed today.
DISCUSSION: It's easy to have good relationships when everything is running smoothly. But relationships really count when the project or related activities start to unravel. As with anything involving people, establishing processes to encourage good communication and relationships and making clear expectations, provides the cornerstone for success in any project. TRANSITION: Let’s now take a quick look at resources used in the creation of this presentation on our next Slide 25.
DISCUSSION: The following resources were consulted in the development of this presentation. TRANSITION: We’ll now move on to our final slide 26 and summarize topics discussed during this presentation.
DISCUSSION: Today, we had the opportunity to discuss going beyond classrooms and books— the mechanics of project management —to explore the varied and diverse makeup of relationships— the foundation of project success. Our journey began with setting expectations upfront with your team by Establishing a Relationship Culture. We’ll then moved onto Getting Personal and learning the importance of building true interest in people. We then stopped long enough to focus on Supplier Relationships and the importance of building loyalty. From there we discussed the Power of Networking and the tools available to help you build and maintain a strong, long-term network of relationships with others. Finally, we pulled it all together and examined the importance of Good Relationships Are Key to Success . TRANSITION: Thank you for taking time from your busy schedule to listen in. I’ll now turn it back over to Lori for Questions and Answers.
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