Substance Abuse & the Family (Revised - April 16th)
1. Substance Abuse & the Family
Tara Shepherd, MA, CAS
Deputy Director, Behavioral Health
Modoc County Health Services
Alcohol & Drug Services
2. Substance Abuse & Babies
When a pregnant woman drinks alcohol, the
blood vessels going from the mother to the
baby get smaller.
So, the baby doesn’t get enough food, water
& oxygen.
This can slow the baby’s growth &
development.
3. What Can Alcohol Do to the
Unborn Baby?
Miscarriage – the baby dies before it can live
outside the mother’s womb
Stillbirth -- the baby is born dead
Birth defects – alcohol use during pregnancy
is the leading cause of preventable birth
defects
4. Drinking During Pregnancy
May Cause the Baby to have:
Low birth weight; increased risk for SIDS
Facial problems – thin upper lip, short nose,
flattened or missing bridge of the nose
Eye problems – small eyes, short eye-
openings, drooping eyelids
Vision problems – cross-eyed or near-sighted
5. More Harm to Baby from
Drinking During Pregnancy
Liver, kidney, heart problems
Brain damage
Learning & reasoning problems
Feeding & sleeping problems
Restlessness & irritability
Long-term behavior problems
6. Effects of Mother’s Use of
Marijuana During Pregnancy
Effects on baby of mother’s marijuana use –
• Altered responses to visual stimuli,
tremulousness & high pitched crying
(possible neurological problems)
• Increased risk of infection
• Low birth weight
• Increased risk of SIDS
7. More Effects of Mother’s Use of
Marijuana During Pregnancy
Effects on toddlers and older children
• Increased nighttime arousal & more awake time
(3 year olds)
• Difficulties with problem solving, attention span,
memory, abstract & visual reasoning & impulsivity
in school-age children
• Psychological problems, including depression
symptoms at age 10
8. Effects on Baby When Mother
Uses Speed While Pregnant
Low birth weight
Increased risk of SIDS
Small head and brain
Heart defects
Behavior problems
9. Effects on Baby When Mother
Uses Tobacco While Pregnant
Stillbirth
Low birth weight
Increased risk of SIDS
Small body
10. What Else Happens
to These Children?
Children who are prenatally exposed to
alcohol or other drugs are 2 to 3 times more
likely to be abused than are other children.
WHY ???
11. Children in Homes With
Parental Substance Abuse
Nearly 30 million children in the U.S. live in
alcoholic households
14 million children in the U.S. live with a
parent who has used illegal drugs in the past
year
12. When Parents Abuse Substances…
Interferes with the development of that
special bond between mother and baby
Interferes with a parent’s mental functioning,
judgment, and capacity to protect the child
Interferes with a parent’s ability to respond
consistently & sensitively to a child
13. Parental Substance Abuse
Leaves the parent emotionally and physically
unavailable to a child
Lowers a parent’s threshold of aggression
toward children
Lowers a parent’s ability to set and maintain
clear and appropriate boundaries with
children
14. Parental Substance Abuse,
cont.
Parent may spend household money needed
for food, clothing, and other needs on
alcohol and other drugs
May result in being associated with criminal
activity that might jeopardize a child’s health
and safety
Leads to neglect of a child’s routine health
care needs
15. Help is Available
If you, or someone you know needs help,
contact Modoc County Behavioral Health
(233-6312) and ask to schedule an alcohol
and drug assessment appointment with a
counselor (2 hour appointment).
If it is the parent of a child 0-5, services are
free with enrollment in Health Beginnings,
otherwise fees on a sliding scale.
16. Addiction
Addiction is a chronic brain disease.
Treatment is available.
Treatment works.
Treatment compliance and relapse rates are
similar for addiction and other chronic
diseases (like diabetes, asthma, hypertension).
17. Children …
Parental Substance Abuse
Children raised in homes with parental
substance abuse are more likely to:
• Develop anxiety and depression
• Have problems in school
• Act out aggressively
• Become addicted to alcohol & other drugs
18. Substance Abuse & Violence
in the Home
72% of women surveyed in women’s shelters
reported partners with drinking problems
Sibling physical abuse is more common in
families with parental substance abuse
Daughters of alcoholics are twice as likely as
other girls to be victims of incest
19. GROWING UP with
Parental Substance Abuse
Children experience trauma & pain from their
parents’ words and attitudes, which results in:
* children miss important parenting designed to
prepare them for adulthood.
* children miss parts of their childhood when
forced (by the absence of parenting) to adopt
certain roles which help them survive in the
family.
20. Roles Assumed by Children of
Parents Who Abuse Substances
Sometimes, Chief Enabler
Family Hero
Scapegoat
Lost Child
Mascot
21. A Parent Suffering from the
Disease of Addiction
Experiences pain and shame, but may not see it
as a result of excessive alcohol or drug use
Experiences feelings of guilt, inadequacy, fear
and loneliness
Inappropriate defenses to hide shame & guilt:
irrational anger, hostility & depression
Project blame onto others, including family who
take on unhealthy roles in order to survive
22. Chief Enabler
Usually the spouse, but sometimes an older
child
Enabling is anything that protects the
chemically dependent person from the
consequences of their behavior
Becomes so obsessive about the addict’s
behavior, they lose perspective on own lives
23. Chief Enabler, continued
If spouse, may try to stay connected to their
partner by drinking or using with them
Usually a combination of controlling &
enabling behaviors
Often have feelings of anger, depression, fear
and loneliness
24. The Family Hero
Usually the oldest child
Over-responsible & over-achiever
Gets self-worth by being “special”
Family reassured it is doing well by getting
pride and self-esteem from the achievements
of the hero
25. Hero, continued
As things get worse, driven to higher and
higher levels of achievement in order to keep
the family together
Achievement cannot remove the Hero’s
inner feelings of inadequacy, guilt, fear, pain
and confusion
At risk of psychological abuse from playing
the role of parent to younger siblings
26. Heroes … as Adults
When grown, heroes are often rigid,
controlling & judgmental (of self & others)
Compulsive & driven; perfectionists
“Outside” success, but cut off from their
inner emotional lives
Deep inside still feel inadequate & insecure
27. Recommended Adult Behaviors
with Family Hero Children
Give attention when not achieving
Validate the child’s intrinsic worth & try to
separate feeling worthy from achievement
Let the child know it is okay to make
mistakes
Avoid letting the child take on parental
responsibilities
28. The Scapegoat
Frequently the second-born child
Acts out the tension and anger the family
ignores
Gets attention negatively
Provides distraction from the real issue of the
parent’s substance abuse
29. Scapegoat, continued
Everyone can pretend the real issue is the
scapegoat
Family is often ashamed of the scapegoat
Poor school performance, use of alcohol and
other drugs, promiscuous sexuality, criminal
activity
Makes strong peer alliances, but relationships
tend to be shallow
30. Scapegoat, continued
The most emotionally honest child in the family
Usually very sensitive & caring, so they feel
tremendous hurt
Feelings of self-hatred; self-destructive
May lose touch with inner potential & sense of
morality
Often at risk of physical abuse
31. Recommended Adult Behaviors
with Scapegoat Children
Let them know when behavior is not
appropriate
Give positive attention when the child’s
behavior is appropriate & responsible
Set limits
Give clear explanations & choices
32. More for Adults with
Scapegoat Children
Attempt to develop empathy and
understanding, rather than respond with
anger
Avoid taking the child’s behavior personally,
as a sign of one’s own incompetence as a
parent, mentor, teacher, etc.
33. The Lost Child
Receives reinforcement or reward for
causing no problems
Often shy and isolated
Inwardly, feels like an outsider in the family,
ignored by parents and siblings
Feels lonely
34. Lost Child, continued
Seeks privacy of his/her own company to be
away from the family chaos
Hides their hurt & pain
Attempts to self-nurture by losing themselves
in the solitary world of short-term pleasure,
like excessive TV, reading, music, drugs,
eating, and fantasy
35. Lost child, continued
Prone to getting sick, asthma, allergies or
bedwetting – perhaps the only way to receive
attention
At risk for sexual abuse – isolated, therefore
vulnerable
Poor communication skills, difficulties with
intimacy or forming relationships
36. Recommended Adult Behaviors
with the Lost Child
Point out and encourage the child’s
strengths, talents & creativity
Try to pick out their particular interests, and
often they will talk
Help the child to be in relationships with
other children
37. More for Adults with
Lost Child Children
Do not let other children take care of the
child by talking or answering for him/her
Avoid letting the child remain silent
Call upon the child to join in
Use touch slowly
38. The Mascot
Often the last born child
Each child has more difficulty getting the
parents’ attention because energy and
attention is taken by the addicted parent
The mascot gets attention through humor,
charm, zaniness, and hyperactivity
39. Mascot, continued
“Class clown”
Takes responsibility for emotional well-
being of the family by relieving tension and
stress that everyone else ignores
Provides distraction from real issues
Works hard at getting attention and making
people laugh
40. Mascot, continued
Humor hides inner painful feelings
Feels lonely knowing no one knows the real
person behind the clown mask
Anxiety, depression and fear
Immature behavior patterns that may persist
into adulthood
41. Mascot, continued
Difficulty concentrating
May develop learning disabilities
At risk of physical abuse
Inability to cope with fear, depression &
anxiety may lead them to think they are
going crazy
42. Recommended Adult Behaviors
with Mascot Children
Do not encourage inappropriate displays of humor
Give appropriate chores with some importance and
responsibility
Insist on eye contact
Encourage appropriate humor
Remember the underlying fear and depression
masked by the humor
43. The Only Child
May take on parts of all roles
May play all roles at the same time, or
alternately
Pain and confusion intensified because of the
confusion of roles – “Who am I?”
44. Some thoughts about all roles…
The longer a person plays a role, the more
rigidly fixed he or she becomes in it
Eventually, family members see their roles as
necessary for survival
Then, they play those roles with the same
compulsion, delusion and denial as the addict
plays the role of drinker or drug user
45. The Adult Child
It is hoped that adults who assumed one or
more of these family survival roles as
children eventually realize they have a
choice
They can remain victims of the past, or they
can make the decision to work through their
issues and free themselves to lead happier,
healthier lives
46. Remember . . .
Help is available.
Modoc County Behavioral Health
233-6312
As adults, heroes are often rigid, controlling & extremely judgmental – of others and themselves.
Perfectionists.
They achieve “success” on the outside, and get positive attention, but are cut off from their inner emotional lives.
Family heroes are compulsive and driven as adults because deep inside they still feel inadequate and insecure.