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Idyll Isles (Sample)
        By
 Justin O’Hanley
INT. ALEX’S OFFICE - DAY
The door to the office bursts open, John is in the doorway.
Alex doesn’t even glance away from the Magic Eye Puzzle on
his computer screen.
                    ALEX
          No I insist, come in.
John slowly crosses the room to the desk.

                    JOHN
          It was you. You paid Vinnie to
          dress up like a demon, then had him
          attack me last night to see if I’d
          reveal any hidden abilities.

                       ALEX
          I did.
                    JOHN
          Don’t deny- ok.

                    ALEX
          I know, rather a startlingly
          reprehensible and drastic action.
          Vile, even. I hope it demonstrates
          just how committed I am to making
          you realize your potential.
                    JOHN
          Why can’t you talk to me without
          looking at a picture of a pirate
          ship?

Startled, Alex ends his staring contest with the computer.
                    ALEX
          You got that this is a pirate ship
          just from one look? We DEFINITELY
          need you around here.
                       JOHN
          Mr. Boyle.

Alex swivels in his chair to face him.
                     ALEX
          Sorry John. You have my undivided
          attention.
2.


                    JOHN
          Look. I know you think-
Alex leaps to his feet.
                    ALEX
          You know John, you’re right. It was
          wrong to coerce a man into
          attacking you in exchange for a
          middle management position and
          unlimited hair care products. Why
          don’t I abandon my Machiavellian
          ways and just give you a proper
          orientation?
                    JOHN
          Just let me-

                    ALEX
          Right this way!
Alex places his arm around John’s shoulder and forcibly
steers him into the...


INT. OUTER OFFICE - CONTINUOUS
Alex leads an unwilling John over to Marcus.

                    ALEX
          We take great pains to create a
          relaxing atmosphere around here.
          Wouldn’t you agree, Marcus?
                    MARCUS
               (stilted)
          Inrim presents a number of
          invaluable opportunities for
          clientele and employees alike...

                    ALEX
          Marcus, stop. I told you to say
          that with more spontaneity, we
          worked on it all morning.
He turns to Miss Miminegash, bent over at a filing cabinet.

                    ALEX
          Miss Minimegash! You love working
          for me, don’t you?
3.


                    MISS MIMINEGASH
          Love it? You’re the reason I get
          out of bed every-
                    ALEX
          And you Craig? Do you like it here?
CRAIG, a nearby employee, gazes at Miss Miminegash’s tush.
                    CRAIG
          Oh GOD yes.

                    JOHN
          Mr. Boyle, I really do have
          something to say.
                    ALEX
          Don’t interrupt me, John.

INT. LOBBY - DAY
Alex leads John out into the crowded Inrim lobby.

                    ALEX
          I didn’t construct an industrial
          complex in the middle of your
          island willy-nilly. You’ll find
          there’s a method to my madness.

                    JOHN
          Actually, I won’t, because-
                    ALEX
          You still have some concerns about
          working here, John? Your soon to be
          co-workers felt the same way, but
          now they have this to say.
He sees that everyone in the lobby is milling about.

                    ALEX
          I just have to organize them first.
Marcus and Miss Miminegash head to either end of the lobby
and start to organize employees into groups.

                    JOHN
          Look. This whole legend? I’m still
          getting my head around it. And if
          you’re resorting to desperate
          measures because you really are
          scared, then ok, I get that.
4.


A crowd has formed.
                       ALEX
             They’re ready! Ok gang, to those
             who say we’ve become corporate
             shills, what do we tell them?

                       EMPLOYEES
             "It’s more fun to be a sell-out!"
                       ALEX
             Ooh yes. Again!
Miss Miminegash enthusiastically leads her group’s chant.
Marcus, considerably less so.
                       EMPLOYEES
             "It’s more fun to be a sell-out.
             It’s more fun to be a sell out."
                       ALEX
             It’s a truth I can’t deny!

He is handed a book.
                       ALEX
             Here’s the Orientation handbook!
             When can you start?

He tosses the book to John, who makes no move to catch it.
It flies past him and lands noisily on the floor.
                       JOHN
             Alex. I’ve been trying to tell you,
             I can be reasonable. I may have
             been willing to hear you out. But
             that was before you scared and
             threatened someone I care about.
He glares.

                       JOHN
             So I’ll never be your employee. You
             got that?
He starts to head towards the exit, pointing at Marcus.

                       JOHN
             Make sure he takes me off the call
             sheet, Mr... Uh...
5.


                      ALEX
          Alberton.
                    JOHN
          Mr. Albert-

He stops suddenly. Marcus bristles.
                    JOHN
          Mr... Mr. Marcus Alberton, is it?
          That’s your name?

Marcus looks inscrutable. Alex looks sheepish.
Slowly, John begins to walk back towards him.
                    JOHN
          All right. What exactly is going-
TZZ. A tazor is suddenly pressed to his neck.
John goes limp and falls unconscious into the arms of a
security guard.

                    ALEX
          Provoked! There was provocation. He
          was attacking. You all saw it.
He looks around to make sure the employees are mollified.

                    ALEX
          Nice one, Roy. Please, take him to
          the involuntary waiting room.
Roy picks up John and carries him off. Alex smiles at his
employees, vaguely sinister.
                    ALEX
          Get back to work.

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Idyll Isles (sample)

  • 1. Idyll Isles (Sample) By Justin O’Hanley
  • 2. INT. ALEX’S OFFICE - DAY The door to the office bursts open, John is in the doorway. Alex doesn’t even glance away from the Magic Eye Puzzle on his computer screen. ALEX No I insist, come in. John slowly crosses the room to the desk. JOHN It was you. You paid Vinnie to dress up like a demon, then had him attack me last night to see if I’d reveal any hidden abilities. ALEX I did. JOHN Don’t deny- ok. ALEX I know, rather a startlingly reprehensible and drastic action. Vile, even. I hope it demonstrates just how committed I am to making you realize your potential. JOHN Why can’t you talk to me without looking at a picture of a pirate ship? Startled, Alex ends his staring contest with the computer. ALEX You got that this is a pirate ship just from one look? We DEFINITELY need you around here. JOHN Mr. Boyle. Alex swivels in his chair to face him. ALEX Sorry John. You have my undivided attention.
  • 3. 2. JOHN Look. I know you think- Alex leaps to his feet. ALEX You know John, you’re right. It was wrong to coerce a man into attacking you in exchange for a middle management position and unlimited hair care products. Why don’t I abandon my Machiavellian ways and just give you a proper orientation? JOHN Just let me- ALEX Right this way! Alex places his arm around John’s shoulder and forcibly steers him into the... INT. OUTER OFFICE - CONTINUOUS Alex leads an unwilling John over to Marcus. ALEX We take great pains to create a relaxing atmosphere around here. Wouldn’t you agree, Marcus? MARCUS (stilted) Inrim presents a number of invaluable opportunities for clientele and employees alike... ALEX Marcus, stop. I told you to say that with more spontaneity, we worked on it all morning. He turns to Miss Miminegash, bent over at a filing cabinet. ALEX Miss Minimegash! You love working for me, don’t you?
  • 4. 3. MISS MIMINEGASH Love it? You’re the reason I get out of bed every- ALEX And you Craig? Do you like it here? CRAIG, a nearby employee, gazes at Miss Miminegash’s tush. CRAIG Oh GOD yes. JOHN Mr. Boyle, I really do have something to say. ALEX Don’t interrupt me, John. INT. LOBBY - DAY Alex leads John out into the crowded Inrim lobby. ALEX I didn’t construct an industrial complex in the middle of your island willy-nilly. You’ll find there’s a method to my madness. JOHN Actually, I won’t, because- ALEX You still have some concerns about working here, John? Your soon to be co-workers felt the same way, but now they have this to say. He sees that everyone in the lobby is milling about. ALEX I just have to organize them first. Marcus and Miss Miminegash head to either end of the lobby and start to organize employees into groups. JOHN Look. This whole legend? I’m still getting my head around it. And if you’re resorting to desperate measures because you really are scared, then ok, I get that.
  • 5. 4. A crowd has formed. ALEX They’re ready! Ok gang, to those who say we’ve become corporate shills, what do we tell them? EMPLOYEES "It’s more fun to be a sell-out!" ALEX Ooh yes. Again! Miss Miminegash enthusiastically leads her group’s chant. Marcus, considerably less so. EMPLOYEES "It’s more fun to be a sell-out. It’s more fun to be a sell out." ALEX It’s a truth I can’t deny! He is handed a book. ALEX Here’s the Orientation handbook! When can you start? He tosses the book to John, who makes no move to catch it. It flies past him and lands noisily on the floor. JOHN Alex. I’ve been trying to tell you, I can be reasonable. I may have been willing to hear you out. But that was before you scared and threatened someone I care about. He glares. JOHN So I’ll never be your employee. You got that? He starts to head towards the exit, pointing at Marcus. JOHN Make sure he takes me off the call sheet, Mr... Uh...
  • 6. 5. ALEX Alberton. JOHN Mr. Albert- He stops suddenly. Marcus bristles. JOHN Mr... Mr. Marcus Alberton, is it? That’s your name? Marcus looks inscrutable. Alex looks sheepish. Slowly, John begins to walk back towards him. JOHN All right. What exactly is going- TZZ. A tazor is suddenly pressed to his neck. John goes limp and falls unconscious into the arms of a security guard. ALEX Provoked! There was provocation. He was attacking. You all saw it. He looks around to make sure the employees are mollified. ALEX Nice one, Roy. Please, take him to the involuntary waiting room. Roy picks up John and carries him off. Alex smiles at his employees, vaguely sinister. ALEX Get back to work.