Michael Kort, whose 96-year-old mother has Alzheimer's disease and is in a nursing home, has sage advice about what to ask before nursing home care becomes inevitable. The bottom line is not to miss the chance to ask these questions and make arrangements while your parent is still lucid.

1. Four Things to Do Before Your Parent Goes to a
Nursing Home
Ronnie Friedland, Care.com Contributor

2. 1. Ask About Your Family History
2January 29, 2015
Ask questions about:
• Childhood
• Relationships
• Family history

3. 2. Discuss End-of-Life Options
3January 29, 2015
• It's a painful and awkward discussion, but knowing your
parent's preferences as to end-of-life options -- such as
wishes regarding resuscitation efforts or feeding tube usage
-- will help you tremendously.
• Have this discussion and get your parent's preferences in
writing, in the form of a living will.

4. 3. Choose a Facility For Your Parent
4January 29, 2015
• If you need to have your parent move to assisted living,
make sure there is an affiliated section where she can move
if her condition worsens.
• Facilities that offer both assisted living and options for
increased nursing care help make the transition easier if and
when assisted living no longer meets her needs.
• Many facilities have long waiting lists, but if your parent is in
that facility's assisted living section, then she will have
priority over people coming from a different setting.

5. 5. Obtain Legal Powers if They
Should Become Incompetent
5January 29, 2015
Durable power of attorney
In order to make decisions on your parent's behalf, you will need what is called a
power of attorney -- a document that allows your parent to appoint a person or
organization to handle her affairs while she is unavailable or unable to do so. A
"durable" power of attorney appoints someone to make decisions if an individual
becomes mentally incompetent.
Social Security Administration account
Having authorization to deal with the Social Security Administration on your parent's
behalf enables you to inform them of moves your parent makes, such as to an
assisted living facility, nursing home or hospice. It also enables you to obtain
information about your parent's account and to deposit her social security checks
-- though arranging for direct deposit into your parent's bank account can
eliminate this latter task. For more information about this, call 1-800-772-1213.
Bank and investment accounts
Power to handle bank accounts can be obtained by going to the bank with your still-
lucid parent and adding your name to his/her account(s). Or, if your parent calls
the bank or investment service from his/her home phone, she/he can request a
form that adds your name to the account, enabling you to access it on your
parent's behalf. You and your parent will both need to sign the form, which may
need to be notarized.

6. Learn More
6January 29, 2015
Read Five Things to Do Before Your Parent Goes
to a Nursing Home here:
http://www.care.com/senior-care-five-things-to-do-
before-your-parent-goes-to-a-nursing-home-
p1017-q14830.html
Want to learn more about senior care and families?
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http://www.care.com/senior-care-articles-resources-
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