Developing positive relationships with parents

DEVELOPINGDEVELOPING
POSITIVEPOSITIVE
RELATIONSHIPSRELATIONSHIPS
WITH PARENTSWITH PARENTS

IMPORTANCE OFIMPORTANCE OF
DEVELOPING POSITIVEDEVELOPING POSITIVE
RELATIONSHIPSRELATIONSHIPS
According to Erik Erikson (1902-1994) offers a basic
framework for understanding how people grow in
relation
to the way they interact with others.

IMPORTANCE OF DEVELOPINGIMPORTANCE OF DEVELOPING
POSITIVE RELATIONSHIPSPOSITIVE RELATIONSHIPS
CONTINUED…..CONTINUED…..
According to the text Children and Young Peoples Work force
Student Book, 2010, states that “Working with children and their
parents / parental guardian is both fascinating and rewarding at
times.” Simply because, to a large extent, it is all about human
relationships. Children blossom when they feel relaxed with the
people who are caring for and educating them. They also need to
feel that their parents and other adults around them are
comfortable with each other.
In some ways, creating the emotional backdrop is as important as
any curriculum, play opportunity or theory of development.
It requires an understanding of how best to promote positive
relationships.

TEACHER DEVELOPING POSITIVETEACHER DEVELOPING POSITIVE
RELATIONSHIPS WITH SUDENTSRELATIONSHIPS WITH SUDENTS
According to Sara Rimm-Kaufman, PhD, and Lia Sandilos,
PhD, University of Virginia, states that “Improving students'
relationships with teachers has important, positive and long-
lasting implications for both students' academic and social
development.” Solely improving students' relationships with their
teachers will not produce gains in achievement. However, those
students who have close, positive and supportive relationships
with their teachers will attain higher levels of achievement than
those students with more conflict in their relationships.

RELATIONSHIPS WITH STUDENTSRELATIONSHIPS WITH STUDENTS
Bear in mind that the challenge of motivating students
may be more difficult than it once was, the literature
from research and classroom practice related to
motivation often mentions the quality of teacher-student
relationships as a critical variable. High-quality
relationships can motivate students to learn and engage
in fewer disruptive behaviors (Hawley 1982; Morganett
1991; Spaulding 1992; Wlodkowski 1986).

PRACTICAL WAYS IN DEVELOPINGPRACTICAL WAYS IN DEVELOPING
POSITIVE RELATIONSHIPS WITHPOSITIVE RELATIONSHIPS WITH
STUDENTS continued….STUDENTS continued….
1.1. Teachers should get to know the students by name as quickly as possible. Students
will appreciate this. You may want to distribute an information sheet at the first class
period. The sheet can ask students for their name, where they live, interests or hobbies,
a success experience, goals, new places they have visited.
2. Teachers should get to know some personal things about each student. Another
activity is to take advantage of the time at the beginning and end of class, after tests,
before holidays, or after holidays just to talk with and listen to students. Ask students
about their weekends, goals and aspirations, and opinions about local, national, and
world events. What you talk about is probably less important than the fact that you
were interested enough to ask and listen. In your effort to improve classroom climate
and build better teacher-student relationships, avoid focusing on answering factual
questions or testing students' knowledge when discussing current events. Instead, ask
them opinion questions. The goal is to get students to participate, to feel like they are
valued members of the class and that their comments are valued-not to assign grades.

STUDENTS continuedSTUDENTS continued….….
3. Conduct a values analysis discussion about some current event or topic. In this activity, it is
important that certain rules be followed. Make sure that when anyone is speaking, everyone
else listens to the speaker. Students may ask questions to help clarify what a student is saying,
but they cannot challenge or disagree with the speaker. Other students can respond with their
opinions and support it, but they cannot directly disagree with each other.
4. Teachers should provide positive comments when appropriate. Sometimes we
become so busy or frustrated by the problems that occur that we forget to notice and
comment on the positive things students do. Teachers can recognize effort,
cooperative behaviour, and helping behaviour. Positive comments can also be made
about things like a new hair style, a shirt, a pair of shoes, or a good voice. If you
think the student might be embarrassed by public recognition from a teacher, then
comment privately to the student. This can be done during study time. Or, you can
write comments on papers you are returning to students such as homework
assignments or tests.

5. Be positive and enthusiastic when teaching. Most students find it difficult to
be motivated when the teacher is not. As we demonstrate our interest and joy
in teaching, it shows that we enjoy being in the classroom and implies we
enjoy being with the students. This should enhance teacher-student
relationships.
6. Show students that you are not only interested in them but also that you care
about them. How can you do this? Take the time to talk individually with
students. You could do this by setting a goal for talking individually with each
student every week, or whatever is practical. You can ask about how they are
doing with the content and skills in the course, or you may prefer to make the
conversation a more personal one. For example, you might ask students about
their extracurricular activities, hobbies, or interests.

7. Avoid the use of threats and punishment. If students do something that is
disruptive, use a time-out procedure rather than punishment.
8. Do not play favorites. Some students are easy to like, while others are not.
Yet we need to be sure that some students do not get special privileges and
others harsher treatment because of our feelings toward them. When we have
tasks or responsibilities to be carried out, be sure to give all students an
opportunity to participate. This will give us one more opportunity to
strengthen our relationship with students by showing trust in them, as well as
providing us with the opportunity to thank them for something they have
done.
If you have a particularly challenging student, you might try an activity
suggested by Wlodkowski (Hawley 1982).

9. Create a supportive classroom environment. Instead of having students
compete with each other for grades, recognition, and/or success, have students
work together cooperatively to carry out some task or project. In the
evaluation process, base the grade on both individual and group achievement.
Structure the evaluation process in such a way that individual improvement
will help the group grade as well as the individual grade. This will hopefully
get students to work together and help each other.
10. Create an environment where questions and answers-even wrong answers-
are encouraged and valued. Students learn more and participate more when
they feel comfortable asking and answering questions. But students will not
ask or answer questions if they think they will be embarrassed. Encourage and
recognize students when they ask and answer questions. When students tell
you that they do not understand something, tell them that you appreciate their
comment because it helps you to know what aspects of a lesson need
additional coverage.

RELATIONSHIPS WITH PARENTSRELATIONSHIPS WITH PARENTS
Parents also benefit from being involved in their children's education by
getting ideas from school on how to help and support their children, and by
learning more about the school's academic program and how it works. Perhaps
most important, parents benefit by becoming more confident about the value
of their school involvement. Parents develop a greater appreciation for the
important role they play in their children's education.
This is the time you are building rapport and developing a relationship of trust.
Therefore, an appropriate time and setting is important for the first brief
encounter.

POSITIVE RELATIONSHIPS WITH PARENTSPOSITIVE RELATIONSHIPS WITH PARENTS
1.Smile When You See Parents
Greet them. Most parents only occasionally interact with teachers so make
sure that at least 90 percent of your encounters with them are positive, warm,
and friendly. The impressions left from fleeting encounters in the hallway last
a long time.
2.Learn Their Names
(If you have a self-contained class.) Learn how they like to be addressed (Mr.
____? Señora? By their first name?) and how to pronounce them correctly.
3. Declare Your Intention
Tell them that you want to partner with them, that you appreciate their support,
and look forward to working together.

continued….continued….
44. Communicate Often and in Various Forms
Provide information about what's going on in your class (weekly would be
ideal): what students are learning, what they've accomplished, what you're
excited about, what they're excited about, and the learning and growth you're
seeing. Suggest things that they might ask their child about: "Ask them to tell
you about what they learned last week about meal worms," or "Ask them to
read you the haiku they wrote.“
5. Make a Positive Phone Call Home
If you have a self-contained class, call all homes within the first couple of
weeks and then at regular intervals throughout the year. If you teach many
students, identify those students who perhaps need a positive call home.

6. Lead with the Good News
Give positive praise first when calling parents or meeting with them to discuss
a concern. Every kid has something good about him/her. Find it. Share it. Then
share your concern. Adhere strictly to this rule.
7. Find a Translator
If you can't speak their language, seek a translator for at least one parent
conference and/or phone call. (For obscure languages, you can sometimes find
a refugee center or other public agency that can help). Reach out to those
parents as well; do whatever you can to connect.

8. Your Language is Powerful
It communicates an awareness that there are many different kinds of families.
Be careful not to assume a mother is, or isn't married, or even that if she is
married, she's married to a man. Learn to ask open-ended questions and
understand that sometimes parents/guardians might not want to share some
information.
9. Ask Questions about the Child
"What kinds of things does he enjoy doing outside of school? Who are the
special people in her life -- family or family friends? What do you think are
her best characteristics? What was he like as a little boy?" Demonstrate an
interest in knowing your student.

10. Listen to Parents
Really listen. They know a whole lot about their kid.
11. Smile at the Child When talking to a parent in front of a child, smile and
make eye contact with the student to demonstrate that you care about him/her.
Recognize what he/she has done well in your class in front of the
parents. Then share a concern, if you have one.
12. Invite Parents to Share
Distribute a survey at the beginning of the year (if parents don't read/write in
English, students can interview them and relay their answers). Find out what
parents know about and what skills they have. Invite them in especially if it
connects the curriculum and content. Let them share with you their cultural
traditions, interests, passions, skills, knowledge.

13. Let Parents Know How They Can Help
Many want to help but especially as kids get older, parents aren't asked for
help as often and don't know what to do. There's always some way they can
help in the classroom.
14. Be Very Specific
Provide ways parents can support their child at home: "You can help your
child with her math homework by asking her to explain how she got an
answer," or "As you're reading stories at night, ask your child to make
predictions. This strengthens reading comprehension.“
15. Be a Broker of Resources
If they share a concern, be prepared to point them to a direction where they
can find help. If you share a concern ("Your daughter spaces out and doesn't
pay attention") be prepared to suggest what the parents can do.

16. Explain Your Instructional Decisions
Take the time to do this and help them learn about the education system if
they're not familiar with it. Help them understand what you're doing and why.
17. Invite Parents to Participate in Making Some Decisions
Invite their input, give them information that will help them form an opinion,
and listen to their conclusions.
18. Thank Parents
Both individually and publicly for their support, perhaps in your weekly
newsletter. Recognize what they do to help your class and how it's impacting
students.

19. Share Every Success
Let parents know what their child is doing well, what academic skills, social
skills or knowledge he's mastered.
20. Invite Parents to Celebrate and Break Bread Together
Communities are strengthened when people come together in celebration. Start
the year with a potluck. Share food and stories about food. We all bond over
food.

PRACTICAL WAYS TEACHERS DEVELOPPRACTICAL WAYS TEACHERS DEVELOP
POSITIVE RELATIONSHIPS WITH OTHERPOSITIVE RELATIONSHIPS WITH OTHER
TEACHERSTEACHERS
Practical ways in which teachers can develop positive relationships with other
teachers are:
Staff Writers(online discussion, June 25th
, 2015) have identified the following
ways teachers can connect more with their other colleagues.
1.Teach and Learn from each other.
2. Collaborate on lesson plans.
3. Create a personal learning community.
4.Schedule weekly get together.
5.Work together to solve problems.
6.Become a teacher leader.
7.Make time for chatting.
8.Adopt a team mentality.

REFERENCESREFERENCES
D.E.Campbell.2014. Building Positive Relationships. Pearson Allyn Bacon Prentice HallD.E.Campbell.2014. Building Positive Relationships. Pearson Allyn Bacon Prentice Hall
Retrieved from:Retrieved from:
http://www.education.com/reference/article/building-positive-relationships-students/http://www.education.com/reference/article/building-positive-relationships-students/
Building Parent-Teacher Relationships. Retrieved from:
http://www.readingrockets.org/article/building-parent-teacher-relationships
20 Tips for Developing Positive Relationships With Parents20 Tips for Developing Positive Relationships With Parents
SEPTEMBER 23, 2011SEPTEMBER 23, 2011
Retrieved from:Retrieved from:
http://www.edutopia.org/blog/20-tips-developing-positive-relationships-parents-elena-aguilarhttp://www.edutopia.org/blog/20-tips-developing-positive-relationships-parents-elena-aguilar
Erikson.E.(1902-1994).Basic Framework .Theory of psychosocial development.
Establish a Parent-Teacher Relationship

REFERENCESREFERENCES
Lee Morganett.1995.Social Education. Ten Tips for Improving Teacher-
Student Relationships.
Retrieved from: MA: Education Research Associates,
1982.Morganett, L.L. "Good Teacher-Student Relationships: A Key
Element in Classroom Motivation and Management." Education 112
(Winter 1991): 260-264.Spaulding, C.L. Motivation in the Classroom.
New York: McGraw-Hill, 1992.Wlodkowski, R.J. Motivation and
Teaching: A Practical Guide. Washington, DC: National Education
Association, 1986.
Staff writers.(2012,June 25).Best Colleges Online.com.
25 Ways Teachers Can Connect More With Their Colleagues.
Retrieved May 31, 2015 from :
http://www.bestcollegesonline.com/bolg/2012/06/25/25-ways-teachers-can-connect-m

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