This document provides guidance on different types of supervision and effective confrontation techniques for employees. It outlines reflective supervision for mature employees who can self-examine, and directive supervision for immature employees who blame others. Five principles of effective confrontation are listed, such as focusing on behavior not personality. A five-step process is also outlined for effective confrontation, including naming inappropriate behavior and expecting adults to take responsibility. Lastly, the document lists physical and mental techniques to help restore calm, such as stepping away, deep breathing, and counting to 10.

1. Highlights of
Supervision for the Gentle in Spirit
By
Holly Elissa Bruno

2. supervision
for the gentle in

3. WHICH SUPERVISION SHOULD I USE?
REFLECTIVE
Employee is mature enough to
examine her own behavior
Employee does not blame
others for her shortcomings
Employee listens well
Employee demonstrates ability
to grow and change
DIRECTIVE
• Employee cannot reflect on her
strengths and weaknesses
• Employee blames others
• Employee finds excuses
• Employee lacks maturity and the
desire/capacity to learn and
grow
• Employee unable to walk in
other’s shoes

4. Five principles of effective confrontation
1. Focus on behavior, not personality
2. Be factual and concrete
3. Know what you stand for: Keep your eyes on that prize
4. Don’t get “hooked” into power struggles: Q-TIP
5. Expect adults to take responsibility for themselves.

6. Five steps to effective
confrontation
1. Name inappropriate behavior
2. State what is expected
3. Ask: “What will you do to correct this?”
4. PERSIST until a solution is identified and agreed upon
5. Make a clear plan for follow-up, including notification of
consequences if behavior does not change.

7. What helps restore us to sanity?
Physically
• Step away from trigger
• Take deep breaths
• Go outside
• Take a work break
• Eat fruit (glucose to brain)
• Picture person in
underwear
Mentally
• Acknowledge the hijack
• Count to 10
• Pray or Meditate
• Recite a mantra
• Help someone else
• Ask “How important is it?”
• Listen to your gut
• Laugh