1. Mia Ryman’s Bachelorette Challenge Mzyra

2. Our challenge begins in a surprisingly well-built and nice-looking house (that I may have to recreate back in the main neighbourhood for permanent use) by the sea… (Purple outlined boxes mean I’m narrating, by the way)

3. Featuring inside 7 single beds, 5 toilets, 5 baths/showers, 1 double bed, 4 sinks, 2 hot-tubs… (The room in the bottom right will come into play later)

4. 5 chess tables, a giant TV, 3 sofas, 4 benches, a buffet table and an 8-seater table. And a fair amount of art. Oh, and fences were used to block off the beach as, from a practise run, we learnt that that was quite a sim-trap. It may be unblocked later, when sims have interacted enough to make sensible decisions, i.e. actually spend any time with the woman they’re trying to win. The results from the practise day 1 speak for themselves: 36/10, 6/3, 0/0, 0/0, 0/0, 0/0, 0/0. But we won’t make those mistakes this time!

5. And here’s our bachelorette now! Mia Ryman Aspiration: Popularity Personality: 10 neat, 1 outgoing, 10 active, 3 playful, 8 nice. Other: Ryman Legacy generation 2 heiress. Currently a single mother of three. Hoping to change that! Isn’t she pretty, btw? And now on to our bachelors!

6. Andy Rocker Aspiration: Fortune Personality: 10 neat, 1 outgoing, 8 active, 3 playful, 9 nice. Other: Generation three (by the way I count) spare from Chemic’s Rocker Legacy. Has awesome hair that I’m blatantly going to use on somebody else later. Chemistry: 2 bolts. Predicted placement going by what I know: 3rd

7. Bernardo Mobacy Aspiration: Family Personality: 7 neat, 9 outgoing, 9 active, 3 playful, 7 nice. Other: Generation two child of a spare in joandsarah77’s Mobacy. Chemistry: 1 bolt. Predicted Placement: 7th (though I would have guessed higher before I saw the chemistry)

8. Chephren Bephalet Aspiration: Popularity Personality: 9 neat, 2 outgoing, 5 active, 3 playful, 5 nice. Other: Member of generation two in Dorylis35’s An Almost Legacy by the Sea. You can’t tell from here, but he also has elf ears and magical powers apparently! Fun times. Oh, and more custom hair for us to steal. Chemistry: 2 bolts. Predicted Placement: 1st

9. Juan Harris Aspiration: Fortune Personality: 1 neat, 7 outgoing, 5 active, 3 playful, 3 nice. Other: Father of Lyle and – you know, if you can’t tell – a zombie. Was engaged to Mia and they got all the way to the altar before Seth used magic to ruin it all, then he fed Juan to his cowplant from which he was later resurrected by Seth’s daughters. Yeah, this story isn’t contrived at all… Chemistry: 1 bolt (though I think it was sometimes two in the main neighbourhood). Predicted placement: 6th

10. Noah Aldrich Aspiration: Popularity Personality: 5 neat, 8 outgoing, 7 active, 3 playful, 7 nice. Other: Generation one spare in BethKeebleLegacy’s Aldrich Legacy. Chemistry: 2 bolts. Predicted Placement: 2nd

11. Rodney Jalowitz Aspiration: Fortune Personality: 4 neat, 7 outgoing, 8 active, 3 playful, 3 nice. Other: Father of Liv, both he and Mia had a spell put on them to force them together so she would have a child. Mia called off their relationship when she found out the truth. Chemistry: 2 bolts. Predicted Placement: 5th [Old garden club dude in the background: “Can I join in please? I want a hot young wife!”]

12. Zack Landry Aspiration: Popularity Personality: 5 neat, 8 outgoing, 6 active, 3 playful, 3 nice. Other: Father of Jose and obviously another zombie. Got as far as the wedding party, but not the altar, before Seth broke him and Mia up and fed him to the cowplant, which he was also resurrected from by Karen and Laura. Chemistry: 2 bolts. Predicted Placement: 4th

13. Finding themselves on a front lawn with a bunch of strangers, many of the bachelors did what came naturally: start making friends. Many of them were popularity sims, after all. Zack and Bernardo: “So, how’d you like to be best friends?” Noah: “Yeah, sure!” Andy: “Um… Okay, I guess…” Chephren: *I wish somebody would try and make friends with me…* Rodney: *Ugh, I didn’t come here for this…*

14. [This is not a normal part of a BC – normally sims are allowed to do whatever they want on day 1, but we’re not having a whole day of almost pure bromance this time, so I had everyone join Mia at the table. They’re free to get up and leave, though…] But there wasn’t much time for standing around making friends as Mia called a get-to-know-you meeting in the dining room. All the guys sat down, most a little nervous; they may have been interested in making friends, but most were also very shy.

15. Some were also quite easily distracted by expensive things. *I wonder if anyone would notice if this art went missing before the end of the challenge?*

16. And others weren’t particularly impressed. “Hey, we’re trying to have a group meeting here, you can’t just get up and ignore us all!” Rodney surveyed the man in front of him. Elf ears. Willing to argue. Interesting. Anyway, it was perhaps too early to start making enemies, he decided.

17. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to appear rude, I was just looking at this picture. I have a keen interest in art, you see, so I couldn’t pass up this opportunity so fast.” “Oh.” Chephren wasn’t sure what to say. Perhaps he’d been too hasty, but he’d gotten the impression that this bachelor wasn’t very nice. He shouldn’t have jumped to conclusions. “Er, it is nice, isn’t it?” “It certainly is. Expensive too. Do you have much art back home?”

18. As Rodney and Chephren chatted amongst themselves, the other bachelors were making more of an effort to impress the actual bachelorette. Andy: “Yeah, so if anything electrical breaks I can deal with it – with all the amps and stuff for the instruments me and my family play I have plenty of mechanical skill and knowledge. Are you into rock music much, Mia?” Mia: “Er, well, I’m more of a pop girl myself, but I can enjoy a bit of anything really.” She was trying carefully to be diplomatic – she didn’t want to put anyone off early before they could discover other things they might have in common.

19. With Chephren put off, Rodney went on to appraise the other competition. The one with spiky hair seemed to be doing well. Possibly too well. But there was still plenty of time… Mia would be his. No way in hell was he going to let his daughter be brought up by another man, especially none of these idiots.

20. The others were oblivious to Rodney’s vaguely malicious thoughts and had discovered a new form of competition: who could best compliment Mia. Andy went with what he knew best. “You’re as beautiful as a stairway to heaven – both in terms of an actual stairway to heaven and like a human version of the Led Zeppelin song.” Mia tried not to look completely blank. “Um, aww, thanks. That’s sweet.”

21. Zack decided to chip in with his own version. “Yeah, well, I’ve actually died and seen the afterlife and so I can say that Mia is actually a million times more beautiful than anything there.” Juan was sceptical about whether that was true about Zack seeing an afterlife, because he’d died in the same way and the last thing he could remember before resurrection was a cowplant’s gullet, but he decided not to question it. Mia meanwhile was feeling quite flustered. Yes, it was quite nice being complimented, but she couldn’t really believe them. They were trying to win her over, so they probably would be lying. And it was a little embarrassing getting all this attention.

22. So she briefly excused herself to serve some food and grab a plate of turkey, during which time the conversation shifted back to the bachelors. This had definitely caused Bernardo to try and come out of his shell more; he was okay talking to the other guys, but Mia… Bernardo: “I’m glad we have a buffet table here – I’m not sure I would trust myself to cook. We’re meant to get evicted, not killed off by kitchen fires!” The other guys stared at him. That wasn’t really what you wanted to reveal about yourself when trying to impress people, but just because Bernardo wasn’t quite so shy around guys didn’t mean he wasn’t still nervous. He seemed to realise that he probably shouldn’t have said that, but he couldn’t take it back and everyone was still staring…

23. Mia kindly distracted everyone by noticing and pointing out that Rodney and Chephren were now sat on the floor. “Um, you do realise that there are eight seats up here? You know, one each…?” Chephren was caught a bit off guard by everyone suddenly staring at him instead. “Erm, I know, but… I… couldn’t hear you from that end of the table, so I decided to sit closer,” he said with some attempt at conviction. “Well okay, if you think that’s comfortable…” It didn’t really matter in the end because the ‘meeting’ didn’t last much longer as the bachelors remembered that they had needs other than getting a woman…

24. But problematically there were only so many bathrooms. Luckily for the four it affected, Mia was never in the room when they reached their limit, so, as long as they could act, they could keep their dignity around her. Sorry to the simmers behind these sims, I didn’t expect this – it never happened in the practise run. I thought the bachelors would leave the table when they needed to, given that Rodney and Chephren left almost immediately for no good reason, and there were five toilets, most of which weren’t being used. Most head-deskingly of all was Chephren, who was free of the table and could have gone earlier like Rodney and I swear actually went inside that cubical behind him before coming out again to go on the floor… *facepalm* Sorry. This is almost as bad as an asylum…

25. Andy swiftly brushed off the whole incident and went back to normal ASAP, inviting Mia to play catch outside before it got dark. This was a good idea in all respects – conversation was difficult and awkward at this stage for nearly everyone, but ball games: easy and required little thought.

26. In fact it was such a good idea that as soon as Mia had finished with Andy, Noah invited her to play too, though this time with a football. Mia wasn’t exactly dressed for sport, but she prided herself on not being completely fragile and wanted to prove herself capable of playing with the boys, so she was happy to play these games, even if skipping and tai chi had always been more her thing.

27. It was also lucky for the ‘unfortunate four’ that Rodney, as well as Mia, had not witnessed their earlier problems or it would have been undoubtedly a less happy and comfortable meal that afternoon. Noah and Juan knew more of it, but Noah was far too nice to be so cruel and Juan thought it would be petty to use that against them, so the secret was never spread. And it was a happy meal. By this point everyone had learnt everyone else’s name (it wasn’t as though any two people looked so similar that you could get them confused) and they’d found a few things they could talk about that they had in common. And there was still the old game…

28. Of who could compliment Mia best. Mia, however, had learnt to see this coming and tried to divert it as quickly as possible. “You know what you were saying earlier, Zack? About the afterlife? What was that like?” “Uhhh…” Zack wasn’t very used to lying and therefore wasn’t very good at covering them up lies either. As far as he could remember there hadn’t been an afterlife, he was just trying to say something nice. “Oh, well, it was… white and… soft… like clouds. And it was always light… And there were angels with wings and halos and stuff… It was very pretty. But not as pretty as you!” And so the game resumed, much to Mia’s annoyance.

29. Which meant she swiftly took off to the TV room. “This TV really is the biggest I’ve ever seen. But the quality’s not very good… Where’s the HD button on this remote?” Mia appreciated being alone for once, but that appreciation didn’t last long. She’d never sat alone and watched TV before. Actually, she’d rarely ever been alone before. There’d always been siblings or kids around wanting attention… She wished someone would join her.

30. Most of the bachelors had decided to give her a bit of space, however. Noah took the opportunity to catch up on the local news in the paper…

31. Zack sat down to a game off chess to help him think things through…

32. And Rodney invited Juan to toss a football around. “Look Juan, I know we don’t really know each other and we’re competing against each other and everything, but I think we have something in common.” Juan just raised an eyebrow and said nothing. “We’ve both been with Mia and she a child by both of us – we both have a legitimate claim to her. But now there are all of these foreigners who hadn’t met her before today… They don’t deserve her! They don’t know her!”

33. Juan knew what Rodney was saying and knew that he did understand a bit of what Rodney said, but that didn’t really change things. “It’s Mia’s decision…” “Really? You think so? Whoever she picks will be raising our children! I think we ought to have a say.” “Why aren’t you talking to Zack? He has a child too.” Rodney rolled his eyes. “He’s too soft. But I think we have an understanding. And together we can help eliminate those we don’t think are suitable to look after our offspring.” “Don’t you think Mia would be angry if she found out?” “Maybe, but she won’t find out. She’ll be too busy. Just think about it. I’m sure a situation will arise where we could make the difference…”

34. Back inside Mia was technically no longer alone. Technically because, although Chephren had worked up the courage to come and sit next to her, he had yet to work up the courage to say anything. It was a bit awkward. But when Andy spied them through the doorway they were unlikely to be alone together for long…

35. “As much as I appreciate everyone’s company, guys, I can’t actually see the TV anymore.” But the TV’s volume was too high and the chatter too loud for the relevant bachelors to hear what Mia was saying. Still, she wasn’t actually there to watch TV in the first place, so she guessed it didn’t matter.

36. And Chephren, still struggling for what to say, followed in the others’ lead. “Hey Mia, I think you’re so beautiful that… erm, there’s no point looking out the window at the sea because you look nicer than it does.” He cringed internally at how lamely that had come out, but pretended it was okay. And Mia didn’t snap at him about it because she could tell that that had been difficult and it was still quite sweet.

37. But then that signalled a continuation. “That’s nothing – I’ve seen actual, factual angels, designed to look as beautiful as any person can and Mia still outdoes them.” Zack was gaining confidence. Mia was getting a little irritated, but also suspicious. “Hey Zack, were there other dead people there?” “Huh? Um yeah, sure. Only the good people were where I was though.” “So did you see my parents or grandparents?” “Errrrm…” Zack had adapted to making up these things, but lying about somebody’s dead relatives would cause massive problems if the truth came out. “No, no I don’t think so. But heaven’s a really big place, they were probably somewhere further away from me…”

38. It got later and later and people were getting tired and hungry again, so numbers started to dwindle once more. Andy decided to pretend to fall asleep on the sofa next to Mia, hoping she might find it cute. That plan fell through pretty quickly with all the noise the TV and people were still making though, so he gave up.

39. So it came close to the end of a long day, meaning that some (who hadn’t had to wash earlier for other reasons) could have done with a shower. Whether Noah had actually noticed, or was simply taking the frame of mind that none of the others could complain given the course of their days, was uncertain, but he enjoyed his jelly regardless. Whilst talking to Bernardo, who had happened to pick a seat down the other end of the table.

40. Rodney could hardly talk either. But Mia was headed to bed regardless of anyone’s current state of hygiene, leaving most of the boys downstairs together to have their late-night snacks and chat. The popularity sims were in their element. N: “So you guys are in legacies too?” A: “Well, I’m not sure. I obviously have a family and each generation one child is picked to inherit the main house and stuff, like an heir-” Ch: “Yeah, that sounds like a legacy. Do you know if you guys are heirs or spares yet?” N: “I’m pretty certain I’m a spare.” A: “Ha, I can’t see myself inheriting over my sister, even if she does drive my mom ‘round the bend…” C: “I don’t know yet. Obviously I’ll have to find myself a wife if I’m going to be heir though!”

41. Upstairs Mia was oblivious to all of this ‘legacy’ and ‘heir’ talk. She’d met so many new people in just one day and yet she had to make sense of all the new feelings and pick one she was least interested in. She thought she might have an idea of who’d she have to ask to leave, but she would sleep on it first.

42. None of the guys had stayed up very long once they realised Mia had gone to bed – the closer to her schedule they kept, the more time they could spend with her and probably the better they’d do. And luckily there was no fighting over beds – you took what you could get.

43. Mia woke up the next morning, certain of who would have to go. She felt bad to have to reject somebody she barely knew, especially when all of them seemed fairly nice, but she had to do what she had to do…

44. She had a nice long bath and headed down to serve up breakfast, where she was quickly joined by Rodney and Zack. As usual it started off a little bit awkward, but soon enough the weather was hit upon and discussion flowed. “If it’s always summer do you think it ever rains here?” “I expect so,” replied Rodney. “If it didn’t then it’d probably be a desert by now.” “Maybe it’ll manage to hold off for a week for us.” “Probably not, knowing our luck,” Zack speculated gloomily.

45. And once a conversation had started it was rarely very long before most of the others had joined in, most still in their pajamas or underwear and having turkey or salad for breakfast. “Hey, somebody’s missing, aren’t they?” Mia realised, halfway through her meal.

46. Indeed they were. Bernardo wasn’t particularly hungry and so had gotten absorbed in a game of chess instead. It probably wasn’t a very sensible move.

47. Or it wouldn’t have been if Mia hadn’t decided to come find him and join in. “Hey, chess! We have a set back home. Fancy a game?” “Uh, yeah, sure!”

48. Some people couldn’t bear to possibly leave Mia alone with another man though… “Woo! Go Mia! You can beat this idiot!” “Rodney, I’m trying to concentrate. And don’t be mean!” Rodney considered this for a moment and started whispering instead “Woo Mia! Beat this man with an extremely crooked nose!”

49. The clock struck twelve before Mia and/or Bernardo could have a proper argument with Rodney, signifying eviction time.

50. The boys speculated as to who would go home. “It would be pretty mean to be sent home on the first day after most of us travelled so far, wouldn’t it?” pondered Bernardo. “Whoever goes deserves it,” stated Rodney simply. “Not certain who she’ll pick though. Everyone’s spent time with her, haven’t they? Some more than others, but…”

51. “Maybe there’s a second house we can stay at until the end!” suggested Noah hopefully. Most of the others looked doubtful, but nobody said anything as Mia had just come out to finally make her decision.

52. “Right. Well, uh, hi guys! I’m not used to making speeches or talking to lots of people at once… So yeah, forgive me if what I say isn’t exactly inspiring or prize-winning material, I’m just doing my best… So… Anyway, it’s probably best if I’m just straight and honest about stuff.”

53. “You all seem like pretty nice guys and I’m sure I could be at least friends with all of you, if not more. It’s a shame that I have to let one of you go, but don’t take it personally, I like you too, it’s just that the past twenty-four hours or so didn’t go quite as well with you as with the others. So yes, I’m afraid the person I’m having to let go is…”

54. “Zack.”The other guys let out more or less conspicuous sighs of relief. “Me?” he asked in a small voice. “Really?” “I’m sorry Zack, it was a very close-run thing, but… it’s just not there anymore. Like I said, since we live near each other we can still be friends and everything, just not more than that.”

55. “But what about- Don’t we have a child?” “Yes,” nodded Mia. “His name’s Jose, he’s a real sweetheart and a good boy, I’m sure you’ll love him when you get to meet him.” “But shouldn’t that count for something?” “It should,” sighed Mia. “But I also have two other children and they can’t all have their fathers married to their mother without seriously breaking the law. You can come over and visit him as much as you want – or, if you’ve got a house, he could visit you when he feels like it. Just because we’re not together doesn’t mean you don’t get to be a father.”

56. Zack sighed, but forced a smile. “Alright. I’m sure you know what you want. And I will be a good Dad to Jose, don’t worry about that. I’ll get a nice house and build him toys and things and-” “Okay,” Mia smiled. “But you don’t have to go massively overboard, I’m sure he’ll be happy just to know and hang out with you, you won’t have to buy his love.”

57. Zack and Mia hugged goodbye as the other bachelors started to chat amongst themselves again. Rodney ignored the other bachelors though and watched the goodbye scene. One down, he thought…

58. Day 1 Scores: 1st: Juan; 25/12 = 37 (17/12 = 29) 2nd: Andy; 21/13 = 34 (20/10 = 30) 3rd: Chephren; 22/9 = 31 (18/8 = 26) 4th: Rodney; 19/9 (7/0 = 7) 5th: Bernardo; 18/6 (18/6 = 24) 6th: Noah; 9/7 (16/7 = 23) 7th: Zack; 7/7 (7/0 = 7) It seriously sucks to be Zack here. Admittedly, looking at their relationship scores towards Mia, he was hardly the best candidate for staying, but if Mia hadn’t sat down to that chess game with Bernardo he would have gone instead and Zack might have picked up the pace in day two, given how they did have two bolts and all. There’s quite a bit of difference between Mia’s scores and the bachelors’ scores, but I’m not so concerned about differences in the first number in the score as the second as that’s much harder to make up…

59. Over at management headquarters… “And so now she’s picked a bunch of strangers she’s never met over me… And she says I can still have a father-son relationship with… Josh?” “Jose.” “Yeah, Jose, but how will I be able to go to their house when she’s going to be there all happy with whoever her new husband will be? My life’s pretty much over, they might as well never have bothered bringing me back.”

60. Jess listened sympathetically. She really had thought Zack would do better than this, even if he didn’t win. She glanced at her watch and wondered how much longer he would be miserable for. She could tell him to stop being so emo and man up, but she feared that some god of hypocrisy would strike her down where she sat. And it was quite sad for him, after all.

61. “I mean, what am I supposed to do with the rest of my life? At least before I had a fit, young, working body going for me too, but Mia was all I could have now! And she was so pretty… I might as well just sit in a room and wait for death, because who’s going to want a family or even a friendship with a zombie like me? Who’s going to employ somebody who can’t walk above lurching speed? When I occasionally have distracting thoughts about eating people’s brains? Ugh, my life is over….”

62. “Zack? Has your long-term memory been working properly since you became a zombie?” Zack looked up, confused. “What?” “If you recall, Mia wasn’t your first kiss, or even your first girlfriend. You’d experienced love before you met Mia, even if you didn’t settle down and have children. You know, back when you were a teenager…?”

63. “Oh yeah…” said Zack slowly, his eyes glazing over a little. “I remember that. Sara Jayapalan! The smartest girl in my class and she agreed to go out with me…” “See!” “I haven’t heard from her since she went to university… I heard about her, she became Mayor and all sorts…” “She’s a very powerful woman,” Jess agreed. “And she’s still single.”

64. But Zack’s shoulders slumped again with despair. “But what’s the point in bringing her up again? She’s powerful, probably rich, she could have her pick of anyone. And if she hasn’t picked it’s probably because she doesn’t want anyone. Especially not a zombie. That’s hardly good for publicity, is it?”

65. “She’s also an elder and running out of time to have anyone. And if being with a zombie is the biggest scandal she goes through any time soon she’ll be glad; that was her brother who killed you, Juan and Mia’s parents. Frankly, I think being with you would be a welcome red herring for the press. And then she could claim she’s standing up against zombie discrimination. Very few people can argue against that.”

66. “Okay, well, let’s say hypothetically that we meet up again and something happens… Wouldn’t it be weird for me to be in a relationship with Jose’s…” “Mother’s cousin? Maybe a little bit, but if you’ve moved on and Mia’s moved on, why not? It’s not like you were ever married or anything. And technically Sara was there before she was anyway.” “… I don’t know… I don’t want to get my hopes up again just to be rejected…”

67. “It’s not another bachelorette challenge, Zack! At least let me put the two of you back in contact. I’m sure she’ll at least be happy to hear from an old friend, even if she isn’t interested in anything more. You could always just help her pass anti-discrimination-against-zombies measures and stuff.” Zack sighed. “Okay, okay. Do what you can.” “Excellent! Now your flight back is in a few hours, unless you want to stay and watch the end-?” “No, no. I can’t handle seeing other people in happy relationships. And probably not zombies.” “Okay, well we’ll probably give you a call to tell you the result when it’s finished, but have fun travelling back! Talk to Sara!”

68. Esme turned to Jess as Zack left and whispered “They’re going to wind up together now, aren’t they?”

69. She waited for the door to fully close before laughing, “Of course! Sara’s a family sim and now she’s beyond the possible accidental-ACR-baby phase, I’m happy to let her settle down. Especially since I’d have to play Zack anyway.” “If you thought you might get them together, why didn’t you let them have non-accidental babies before she became an elder?” asked Katri from the bodyguard’s chair. “She was predetermined zero. And besides, Simfield has almost fifty playable sims in it now. It needs no un-necessitated increasing! I’m just glad I can make him – and Sara – happy. I’m not sure what I’m going to do with Juan if he gets kicked out though…” she ended, thoughtfully.

70. Downstairs Zack walked out of the dim building and into the bright summer’s day. Maybe everything would be okay in the end.