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1. Welcome to
Confident
Communication

2. Charis Loveland
Co-founder, ML Assist
Product manager in AI/ML,
design thinker, metrics-driven leader
@Mozilla, General Assembly, formerly Microsoft,
Rue La La, EMC, SAP
@charislovestech
LinkedIn

3. Today’s Learning Objectives
● Master relationships
● Influence people, decisions, results
● Manage risks, anticipate problems
Keep these
objectives in
mind to get the
most out of
today!

4. INFLUENCE
PEOPLE,
DECISIONS,
RESULTS
COMMUNICATION
STYLES
MANAGE RISK,
ANTICIPATE
PROBLEMS
HOW TO DISSENT
AND REFUSE
Agenda Topics
MASTER
RELATIONSHIPS

5. Personality Analysis
• Myers-Briggs
• DISC
• Enneagram
• Energy types

7. DISC

8. DISC: Dominance

9. DISC: Influence

10. DISC: Steadiness

11. DISC: Conscientiousness

12. DISC Communication

13. Enneagram

14. Energetic self perception

15. Active Listening
As explained in

16. COMMUNICATION
STYLES
INFLUENCE
PEOPLE,
DECISIONS,
RESULTS
MANAGE RISK,
ANTICIPATE
PROBLEMS
HOW TO DISSENT
AND REFUSE
CONFIDENT
COMMUNICATION
MASTER
RELATIONSHIPS

17. Communication Styles
• Assertive
• Aggressive
• Passive-aggressive
• Submissive
• Manipulative

18. Assertive Reactions
• They can take the person at their word
• The person can look after themselves
• Respect for the person

19. Aggressive Reactions
• Defensive, aggressive (withdraw or fight back)
• Uncooperative, humiliated/degraded, afraid, lose respect
• Mistakes and problems are not reported in case they
blow up
• Others are afraid of being railroaded,
exploited, or humiliated

20. Passive-Aggressive Reactions
• Confused
• Angry
• Hurt
• Resentful
Q: How many passive-aggressive
people does it take to change a
light bulb?
A: You’ll never know,
because they unfriended you
and blocked you on
Facebook “by accident.”

21. Submissive Reactions
• Guilty
• You don't know what you want and they
discount you
• They can take advantage of you
• Give up trying to help them because
their efforts are subtly or overtly rejected.

22. Manipulative Reactions
• Angry, irritated, or annoyed
• Resentful
• Can’t trust

23. COMMUNICATION
STYLES
INFLUENCE
PEOPLE,
DECISIONS,
RESULTS
MANAGE RISK,
ANTICIPATE
PROBLEMS
HOW TO DISSENT
AND REFUSE
CONFIDENT
COMMUNICATION
MASTER
RELATIONSHIPS

25. Pep Talk
● Sounds silly,
but it really works
● Responsibility transfer
● Turn up the volume

26. Power Pose
● Amy Cuddy

27. Communication Channels
• Face to face
• Instant message
• Slack/Teams
• Phone
• Text
• Screenshare

28. COMMUNICATION
STYLES
INFLUENCE
PEOPLE,
DECISIONS,
RESULTS
MANAGE RISK,
ANTICIPATE
PROBLEMS
HOW TO DISSENT
AND REFUSE
CONFIDENT
COMMUNICATION
MASTER
RELATIONSHIPS

29. What to Look For
MANAGE RISK, ANTICIPATE PROBLEMS

32. Communication Best
Practices
MANAGE RISK, ANTICIPATE PROBLEMS

33. Stakeholders
INTERNAL
Someone who is interested in or has influence
over your product.
EXTERNAL
Someone who can affect or be affected by
your work.

34. Stakeholders
EXTERNAL
INTERNAL
CUSTOMERS
INVESTORS
SHAREHOLDERS
DEVELOPERS
MARKETING
SALES
FINANCE
QA
SUPPORT
CEO
UX

35. Stakeholders
EXTERNAL
INTERNAL
CUSTOMERS
SHAREHOLDERS
INVESTORS
DEVELOPERS
MARKETING
SALES
SUPPORT
QA UX
FINANCE
CEO
What do you need
from all of them?
● Expertise
● Buy-in
● Funding

36. COMMUNICATION
STYLES
INFLUENCE
PEOPLE,
DECISIONS,
RESULTS
MANAGE RISK,
ANTICIPATE
PROBLEMS
HOW TO DISSENT
AND REFUSE
CONFIDENT
COMMUNICATION
MASTER
RELATIONSHIPS

37. You must possess and
master the ability to effect
change without mandating
something be done. What
and how you communicate
must instead inspire others
follow.

38. Saying No
MANAGE RISK, ANTICIPATE PROBLEMS

39. The difference between
successful people and
very successful people
is that very successful
people say ‘no’ to
almost everything.

40. Reasons People Will Give You to Say Yes
● “But the data looks good.”
● “It’ll only take a few minutes.”
● “We’re going to lose this customer.”
● “We can make it optional.”
● “But my neighbor’s cousin’s wife said…”
● “We’ve got nothing else planned.”
● “Our competitors have it.”
● “If we don’t build it, someone else will.”
● “The boss really wants it.”
*not an exhaustive list ;-)

41. How to Say No
● Does it fit with the product vision?
● Will it still matter in five years?
● Will everyone benefit from it?
● Will it improve, complement or innovate
on the existing workflow?
● Does it grow the business?
● Will it generate new, meaningful
engagement?
● If it succeeds, can we afford to support it?
● Can we design it so the reward is greater
than the effort?
● Can we scope it and do it well?

42. Supercharge Your
Productivity
MANAGE RISK, ANTICIPATE PROBLEMS

43. Process-Oriented Replies
● Don’t just reply “yes” or “Thoughts?”
● Give detailed instructions for the next
step
○ I am available Tuesday at 3 pm EST
or Thursday at 10 am EST. Please
send me a calendar invite for the time
that works for you.
● Takes longer up front but saves overall
time by removing back and forth

44. Best Practices
● Pad your timeline and budget by 10%
● Manage and organize assets
○ What goes where
○ Standard naming conventions for all files
○ Asset workflow
○ Storage protocol
● Streamline feedback
○ From whom (internal and external)
○ Establish process
○ Prioritize

45. Time Management/Organization
● Peter Bregman, daily 18 Minutes template
● Find a system that works for you:
● Outlook or Evernote
● Smartphone notes
● Whiteboards
● Notebook: Rocketbook

46. Productivity
• Agile methodology can help your team to focus on the most
impactful projects
• Results-Only Work Environment (ROWE)
• Pomodoro: work in 25 minute focused blocks
• Evernote: save and file everything, anywhere
– Receipts for taxes, memorable parts of books
• Doodle: easy scheduling for busy people
• See my blog post on Inbox O (Pending Follow Up, Thank You folders)

47. Productivity (cont.)
• Single task for maximum efficiency
• Be selectively excellent
– Done is better than perfect
– Perfect is the enemy of good
• Design your ideal week
– Consider team power hour(s), dedicated chunks of time to get
stuff done

48. Delegation
• At work
– Search out eager individual contributors, mentor them to
take on additional responsibility
• At home
– Entrust family members with additional tasks
– Outsource
• Task Rabbit ($10 off code: PAL18413)
• Local university job boards (BU); babysitting co-op
• Grocery (Peapod), delivery (Postmates, Door Dash)
• Cooking from the Heart delivers healthy meals

49. Boundaries
• Can evolve over time
• Separation works well for some
• Different for each individual
– Eliminating phone use while driving and with children
– Smartphone best practices from WSJ
– Limiting social media interaction

50. Take Care of Yourself
● Fitness and well being
● Exercise
● Get enough sleep and downtime
● Eat a balanced diet with nutritious food
● Invest time in mindfulness
○ Woebot https://woebot.page.link/ASGA
○ www.msmindbody.com
● Listen to audiobooks while commuting
● Use your vacation time
● Cultivate new friendships, hobbies
○ www.meetup.com

52. COMMUNICATION
STYLES
INFLUENCE
PEOPLE,
DECISIONS,
RESULTS
MANAGE RISK,
ANTICIPATE
PROBLEMS
HOW TO DISSENT
AND REFUSE
CLOSING REMARKS
MASTER
RELATIONSHIPS

53. And, check out my instructor page at General Assembly
linkedin.com/in/charisloveland
Contact

54. Resources
● Getting to Yes, Roger Fisher, William Ury, Bruce Patton
● Never Split the Difference, Chris Voss
● Crucial Conversations: Tools for talking when stakes are high, Kelly Patterson
● Mindset, Carol Dweck
● Daring Greatly, The Gifts of Imperfection, Brene Brown
● The Charisma Myth, Olivia Fox Cabane
● Hard Thing About Hard Things, Ben Horowitz
● Why Work Sucks and How to Fix It by Cali Ressler, Jody Thompson
● The Personal Efficiency Program: How to Stop Feeling Overwhelmed and Win Back Control
of Your Work by Kerry Gleeson
● Getting to 50/50: How Working Parents Can Have It All by Sharon Meers, Joanna Strober
● 10% Happier by Dan Harris
● Deep Work, Cal Newport
● Happier: Learn the Secrets to Daily Joy and Lasting Fulfillment by Tal Ben-Shahar
● Breaking the mold: women, men, and time in the new corporate world by Lotte Bailyn

55. Thank you!