Critical Social Skills for Adolescents wtih High Incidence Disabilities: Parental Perspectives

Curricula for students with dis-
abilities can be divided into
academic and nonacademic
areas. Social competence and
social skills are considered
within the nonacademic areas. Traditionally, the
emphasis on social skills has been overshadowed
by academics. However, many educators ac-
knowledge the need for an increased emphasis on
social skills development to promote greater so-
cial competence for students with high-incidence
disabilities (Gresham, Sugai, & Horner, 2001;
Ogilvy, 1994).
Social skills are often defined as a complex
set of skills that include communication, prob-
lem-solving and decision making, assertion, peer
and group interaction, and self-management
(Haager & Vaughn, 1995; Sugai & Lewis, 1996).
These skills are “competencies necessary for stu-
dents to initiate and maintain positive social rela-
tionships with peers, teachers, family, and other
community members” (Quinn, Jannasch-Pennell,
& Rutherford, 1995, p. 27).
During adolescence, prosocial behaviors are
being tested and refined based upon positive and
negative social encounters students experience
daily (Schloss, 1984). There is evidence that dur-
ing this time of development, social skills’ train-
ing has a profound impact in positively
influencing an adolescent’s behavior (Taylor &
Larson, 1999). As such, it is appropriate to ad-
dress social skill development during adolescence.
However, current curricula related to social skills
reveal little consensus on what content is critical
to the success of the student.
There are multiple ways to identify poten-
tially important social skills. One way is to solicit
input from the adults in the lives of children. Par-
163Exceptional Children
Vol. 69, No. 2, pp. 163-179.
©2003 Council for Exceptional Children.
Critical Social Skills for
Adolescents With High Incidence
Disabilities: Parental Perspectives
SHARON M. KOLB
University of Wisconsin-Whitewater
CHERYL HANLEY-MAXWELL
University of Wisconsin-Madison
ABSTRACT: This qualitative research explored parental views about critical social skills for adoles-
cents with high-incidence disabilities. Parents in this study shared their beliefs that emotional in-
telligence and character play critical roles in the social and emotional development of their
children. Findings indicate that although parents agree that academic performance is important,
they want their children to develop skills in two major areas: (a) interpersonal and intrapersonal
skills, which include skills such as communicating, listening, interpreting, and discerning; and (b)
moral development, which includes areas of character, empathy, and perseverance/motivation.
Exceptional Children
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164 Winter 2003
ents and teachers are two such sources since they
are influential in children’s lives and are able to
provide essential information about their children
(Ruffalo & Elliott, 1997). Because parents ob-
serve children’s social behavior in a variety of set-
tings and situations, they can provide valuable
information in reference to children’s social skills
(Ruffalo & Elliott). However, a review of existing
literature reveals that although teachers’ and stu-
dents’ perceptions are examined in various studies
(Baumgart, Filler, & Askvig, 1991; Pray, Hall, &
Markley, 1992; Sugai & Lewis, 1996), few studies
have sought the direct input of parents in identi-
fying critical social skills that should be included
in school curriculum and programs (Haager &
Vaughn, 1995). This is unfortunate because par-
ents are essential participants in the educational
success of their children (Pryor, 1995).
Research has also stressed the importance of
parental participation in enhancing the acquisi-
tion, generalization, and maintenance of social
skills (Haager & Vaughn, 1995; Schloss, 1984;
Sugai & Lewis, 1996), and in planning social
skills training for students (Schloss). However, the
focus is usually on parents providing support to
the designated program, not necessarily on the
identification of skills or the development of pro-
grams that target specific social skills. There is a
clear distinction between merely involving parents
in the implementation of social skills training and
direct parent participation in the origin and fol-
low-up of the program.
Parental inclusion in all aspects of social
skill programming may result in the identification
of different skills or skill levels than those skills
found in teacher-created programs. Teachers are
concerned about appropriate classroom behavior
and traditionally place greater emphasis in target-
ing prosocial skills that specifically address appro-
priate social behaviors needed in the classroom
setting (Schloss, 1984). However, appropriate
classroom behaviors are only a small reflection of
the social skills needed to be socially competent.
Thus, parental participation in the process of es-
sential skill identification is an important consid-
eration. This participation is not restricted to
parents of a certain age group or level in school.
In fact, parental involvement in the education of
their children continues to be important through-
out adolescence. Even though peer influence and
approval have an increasingly important role for
adolescents, parental influence still has a signifi-
cant impact on students (Quinn et al., 1995; Ruf-
falo & Elliot, 1997). Adolescence is a time of
great learning and growing for students.
This study refined our understanding of
which social skills are critical to acquire during
adolescence and maintain throughout adulthood.
More specifically, this study focused on providing
insight into parents’ perspectives of the critical so-
cial skills needed by adolescents with high-inci-
dence disabilities as they move through their
adolescence and into adulthood. Therefore, the
research questions addressed in this study were:
• What do parents think is the meaning of the
term “social skills”?
• What do parents think are critical social skills
that should and should not be included in their
child’s education to prepare students to success-
fully negotiate adolescence and adult life?
M E T H O D O L O G Y
RESEARCH DESIGN
Qualitative research is a multimethod approach to
studying phenomena in their natural settings. To
do this, the qualitative researcher uses interpretive
and naturalistic methods. The purpose of a quali-
tative study is to make sense of, or interpret, in
terms of the meanings people bring to the phe-
nomenon under study (Denzin & Lincoln,
1994). Qualitative methods were selected for use
in this study because the first author was inter-
ested in discovering and describing parental
meanings/perspectives of social skills for her ado-
lescent children. Furthermore, because no existing
theory of social skills accounted for parental
Traditionally, the emphasis on social
skills has been overshadowed by academics.
However, many educators acknowledge
the need for an increased emphasis on
social skills development to promote
greater social competence for students
with high-incidence disabilities.

views, we selected the grounded theory approach
to qualitative research. According to Strauss and
Corbin (1990), a researcher should use grounded
theory when “you want to explain phenomena in
light of a theoretical framework that evolves dur-
ing the research itself [and not a] previously de-
veloped theory that may or may not apply” (pp.
49-50). Thus, we felt that grounded theory was
uniquely suited to helping us answer the ques-
tions of this investigation.
SAMPLING
The participants in this study were parents of stu-
dents who received special education services in a
small midwestern city school district. The sample
of parents was drawn from the parents of children
who attended the middle school in this district
and who had high-incidence disabilities. Using
convenience and purposeful sampling (Bogdan &
Biklen, 1992), participants were selected from the
larger population of parents represented at this
school. The sampling frame included only those
parents of adolescents who had high-incidence
disabilities.
All potential participants resided within the
perimeters of Lake School District (pseudonym),
located in a midwestern city of approximately
14,000 citizens. In this community, there is one
public high school, one middle school, and seven
elementary schools. The total student population
in this district is approximately 3,400. The total
number of students at the middle school is 739.
Of the middle school population, the student
population is 95% white, with 5% representing
minority populations.
Potential participants were parents of stu-
dents with high-incidence disabilities in grades 6
through 9 from the middle school. Students were
identified as having a mild disability as indicated
on their individualized education program (IEP).
High-incidence disabilities include the labels of
learning disabilities, mild cognitive disabilities
(mental retardation), and emotional or behavioral
disabilities. Table 1 displays the demographic data
related to the primary disability labels of students
enrolled in Lake Middle School.
Parents were contacted in writing or by
telephone to request their participation in the in-
terviews. A total of 11 parents returned consent
forms indicating their decision to participate in
this study. Although data collection began with
those 11, we planned to solicit more participants
as needed to obtain theoretical saturation. Be-
cause theoretical saturation was achieved before
the completion of the 11 interviews, no addi-
tional parents were sought.
PARTICIPANTS
The 11 participants of this study were parents to
7 students. They included 3 married couples (6
participants representing 3 students), 1 divorced
couple (2 participants representing 1 student),
and 3 mothers (3 participants representing 3
other students). At the time of the study, these
students ranged in age from 12 to 14 years; six
had cognitive disabilities, three had learning dis-
abilities, and two had emotional disabilities. Table
2 describes each participant in terms of name (by
pseudonym); marital status; and the names, ages
and primary disability label of their children.
Although the sample is representative of the
community population, it is not representative of
all parents of adolescents with disabilities. How-
ever, the intention of this study is to use this sam-
ple of convenience to begin investigating parent
perceptions of social skills.
DATA COLLECTION
Data collection occurred during the 1998-1999
school year at Lake Middle School. Qualitative re-
search is descriptive and typically nonnumeric
(Bogdan & Biklen, 1992). Therefore, data were
collected in the form of in-depth semistructured
interviews, interview transcripts, phone conversa-
tions, informal talks, and field notes (Bogdan &
Biklen). Interviewing began the summer of 1998
and concluded the fall semester of 1999 when
data saturation occurred.
The data collected for this study were col-
lected through in-depth interviews (Taylor & Bog-
dan, 1984) with participating parents and field
Research has also stressed the importance
of parental participation in enhancing
the acquisition, generalization, and
maintenance of social skills and in
planning social skills training for students
(Schloss, 1984).

notes completed by the interviewer after each inter-
view. The interviewer used an open-ended protocol
to ensure complete coverage of the social skills topic
(Taylor & Bogdan). The protocol used in this study
covered the meaning of “social skills,” potential and
critical social skills identification, and parents’ expe-
riences and perceptions of necessary components of
social skills training.
Interview Protocol. The interview protocol
was developed prior to the beginning of data col-
lection. A three-step process helped to identify and
refine the content. First, the first author reviewed
the existing social skills literature and commercially
available social skills curricula. A tentative list of
topics was developed and the initial protocol was
written. This interview protocol was designed with
open-ended questions to help elicit open responses
from participants. Second, an expert panel consist-
ing of three university researchers specializing in
transition, qualitative research, and social skills re-
viewed the initial protocol to determine clarity and
completeness. Third, to help ensure greater reliabil-
ity of the interview questions, initial interviews
were used to determine what adjustments were
needed to ensure the clarity of the interview guide
(Fowler, 1998). Additionally, the information ob-
tained from each of the interviews helped to shape
the questions used during that interview and in
subsequent interviews.
Interviewing. The first author conducted all
the interviews. Each interview occurred at a place
and time convenient for each parent. Four inter-
views were conducted at parents’ homes and six
were conducted at the middle school. One inter-
view was conducted at a parent’s place of employ-
ment. A tape recorder was used during the
interviews (all parents agreed to taping). The result-
ing audiotapes were transcribed verbatim by a pro-
fessional transcription service in a different city.
Each interview began with a broad, open-
ended question. The interviewer used the written
protocol only when needed to guide the partici-
pants into talking about topics of interest to the
researcher. The formal interviews typically lasted
1 hour. However, the interviewer also spent time
before and after each interview informally talking
with participants, both in person and on the tele-
phone. The total formal and informal contact
166 Winter 2003

with each parent ranged from 3 to 4 hours.
Therefore, the total contact time spent with the
participants was approximately 39 hours.
Field Notes. To ensure greater accuracy in
recording and evaluating data from the inter-
views, the interviewer wrote notes immediately
after each interview to summarize key points
(Denzin & Lincoln, 1994). Field notes were
records of both significant reflective and descrip-
tive notes and the amount of time spent with
each participant (Bodgan & Biklen, 1992). The
data collection tools of interviewing, transcript
evaluation, and field notes were helpful in provid-
ing a comprehensive record of the inquiry.
D A T A A N A L Y S I S A N D
I N T E R P R E T A T I O N
Data analysis requires the systematic search and
organization of data obtained from interviews and
field notes to increase the researchers’ understand-
ing of the problem being explored (Bogdan &
Biklen, 1992). In a grounded theory approach,
the process of reducing the data into manageable
units and codes is an integral part of the analysis
process (Miles & Huberman, 1984). Therefore,
for the purposes of analysis, the processes of data
reduction and coding were used to obtain a
deeper understanding of the data collected
throughout this study.
Data reduction is a form of analysis used
to combine pieces of information into various
categories (Miles & Huberman, 1984). We se-
lected coding (Strauss & Corbin, 1990) as the
analytic method we would use to reduce the
data. Three levels of coding were applied: (a)
open coding, (b) axial coding, and (c) selective
coding (Strauss & Corbin).
During open coding, we examined the inter-
view transcripts, highlighting skills, and subjects
and concepts parents identified and developed ini-
tial codes. These codes were generated by examin-
ing and comparing the highlighted data to reflect
broad categories (e.g., communication, self-concept,
respect, friendship). In axial coding, data were
sorted and reorganized inductively and deductively
by chunking and clustering data into similar cate-
gories and then reorganizing data to identify any
connections between or among categories and sub-
categories (e.g., self-awareness, problem-solving,
managing emotions, and self-control). In the final
stage of coding, selective coding, core categories
were systematically selected and related to other cat-
egories in order to validate relationships and iden-
tify categories that needed more exploration (e.g.,
interpersonal and intrapersonal skills, habits of
mind, moral development, and character). After ap-
plying these levels of analysis through the processes
of integrating, weaving, and refining the major cate-
gories, the grounded theory of this study began to
emerge (Strauss & Corbin, 1990). Finally, as a
member check, highlights of the final analysis draft
were reviewed with the participants to ensure accu-
racy of responses and interpretation of perspectives
(Bogdan & Biklen, 1992). The selected highlights
were the participants’ original quotes organized into
themes discovered through the process of coding.
ACCURACY, TRUSTWORTHINESS,
A N D F I D E L I T Y
Establishing accuracy, trustworthiness, and fi-
delity are major factors in reflecting the integrity
of the research project (Glesne & Peshkin, 1992).
These issues were addressed in both the design
and implementation of the research. During im-
plementation, we attended to interviewer rapport,
complete and accurate record keeping, and com-
pleteness in data collection to increase credibility.
We began by addressing the rapport between the
interviewer and the informants. The interviewer
used her previously established relationship with
the participants and the additional time spent in
the preinterview period to develop a rapport with
each participant and to explain the intent of the
study (Glesne & Peshkin).
Next, all interviews were tape-recorded
and transcribed verbatim (Bogdan & Biklen,
1992). Additionally, we enhanced the confirma-
bility of our interpretations by including the
written field notes and a reflexive log. The re-
flexive log included the interviewer’s feelings,
concerns, and ideas related to the study. This log
allowed us to identify her personal perspectives
and to track her thinking as she tested ideas
(Conrad, 1993). Eventually, the data collected
from the interviews seem to become more inte-
grated and redundant. Glesne and Peshkin

(1992) identified this stage of data analysis as
reaching theoretical saturation. Within the de-
sign, we included three specific procedures de-
signed to assure fidelity of our interpretations:
(a) triangulation, (b) member checks, and (c)
peer debriefing (Glesne & Peshkin). Each of
these is discussed in the following sections.
TRIANGULATION
“Multiple sources of data may include various
“copies” of one kind of source, such as multiple par-
ticipants, and different sources of the same informa-
tion” (Whitt & Kuh, 1993, p. 261). Multiple
sources of data included in-depth interviews with 11
participants, field notes, telephone conversations,
and other informal discussions with participants.
MEMBER CHECKS
After extensive data analysis, postcards were
mailed to participants thanking them for their
participation and asking their permission to con-
tact them for additional feedback on the data
analysis. All participants received a draft of the
preliminary analysis. One parent met with the
first author to discuss these initial findings; an-
other seven were contacted via telephone and
asked if the initial analysis accurately reflected
their ideas and feelings about critical social skills.
This gave the participants an additional opportu-
nity to comment and contribute to the data.
PEER DEBRIEFING
We used peer debriefing for two purposes. The first
purpose was to review the interviewing process.
Using a form that covered clarity of questions, ef-
fectiveness and accuracy of interviewing technique,
and content of the interviews, peer debriefers pro-
vided constructive comments and suggestions for
change. In a second round of debriefing, peer de-
briefers served as accuracy checks for discussions of
various conceptual themes that arose during data
collection and analysis.
L I M I T A T I O N S
Although the research problem was used to help
determine the study’s design, some threats to va-
lidity of this qualitative model and method
should be considered. These are the participant
sample and the influence of the researcher as the
instrument. The use of purposive or convenience
sampling may produce a biased sample (Bogdan
& Biklen, 1992). The sample of participants in
this study is only as diversified as the demograph-
ics of the community in which the sample repre-
sented. Because each community and family is
unique, this convenience sample may not be rep-
resentative of other parents who have children
with high incidence disabilities.
The researcher as the instrument is also a
possible threat to validity because each individual
carries some form of bias. However, being aware
of one’s individual worldview and personal bias is
an active step in removing oneself from influenc-
ing the study (Bogdan & Biklen, 1992). During
each interview, the interviewer took notes about
impressions and interpretation of what was being
discussed. Throughout data analysis, we referred
to these notes and cross-referenced them with the
actual transcript of the interview. This strategy,
suggested by Bogdan and Biklen, helped inhibit
the interjection of bias by examining subjective
reflection on what was being perceived during the
study. Another strategy we employed to help pro-
tect against individual bias was to have the analy-
sis critiqued by other colleagues throughout the
study (Bogdan & Biklen). During the data collec-
tion and coding processes, we scheduled confer-
ences with various colleagues (i.e., special and
general middle school educators; university pro-
fessors, and special education doctoral students)
to seek their feedback regarding the analytic tech-
niques and the interpretation of data.
R E S U L T S A N D D I S C U S S I O N
Social skills deficits are some of the major difficul-
ties facing adolescents with disabilities (Hall,
Schlesinger, & Dineen, 1997; Pray et al., 1992).
For that reason, adolescence is an important time
for social skills training and intervention (Ogilvy,
1994). Parents concur that this is an essential ac-
tivity during this developmental period (Haager
& Vaughn, 1995). Parents in this study con-
tributed their thoughts and suggestions about
what skills and methods they feel are critical to
the social development of their adolescent sons
and daughters. Specifically, they addressed the
168 Winter 2003

meaning of the term “social skills” and the identi-
fication of critical social skills. In addition to ad-
dressing the research questions, parents provided
a significant amount of data for effectively teach-
ing social skills.
PARENTAL DEFINITIONS OF
SOCIAL S K I L L S
Our first task in interviewing the parents was to
determine how parents defined the term “social
skills” and to verify a common understanding of
what was being discussed throughout the inter-
views. There was a considerable amount of over-
lap in the terms parents generated and defined in
this study. We found that they were indeed famil-
iar with the term “social skills” and defined the
phrase in two ways: (a) getting along with others,
and (b) exhibiting traits of character.
GETTING ALONG WITH OTHERS
A major emphasis in the parental definitions of
social skills was the ability to get along with
others, including the skills needed to develop
relationships and friendships. In fact, over 70%
of parents defined social skills in this manner.
Each parent had a unique constellation of skills
that accompanied his definition of social skills
as getting along with others. For instance,
whereas Sara described social skills as the “abil-
ity to get along with other kids [and] to be able
to socialize,” Carl included “cooperat[ing] with
and interact[ing] with others.” However, all
seven parents who characterized social skills in
this manner felt that the ability to interact posi-
tively with others summarized their meaning of
the term social skills.
Nested within the category of “getting
along with others” was peer relationships. Peer re-
lationships posed special concerns for these par-
ents. All of them agreed that it was critical for
their adolescents to develop satisfying relation-
ships. However, all were equally aware of the po-
tential for rejection and accompanying emotional
pain. Connie’s comments were typical of the con-
cerns these parent expressed when they talked
about the need for their children to develop satis-
fying relationships. She spoke for many of the
parents when she said:
It’s an area that she hasn’t been . . . [very success-
ful]. I think she’s been rejected and not a part of
[peer social activities], and it hasn’t been until
this school year that anyone has even called her
on the phone or that she has been invited over
to a friend’s house. . . . I think that’s something
kids need before this age. She’s now 15, for her
it’s working. It will be ok. . . . I mean even
though when we’re not accepted, I think the kid
still knows it. They’ll feel it. (Connie)
Despite the risks involved, the parents reported
that they wanted their children “to take risk[s]
and ask someone to be [their] friend even
though [they] might be rejected” (Connie).
They were well aware that their children had
failed to have some of the needed social compe-
tencies to initiate and maintain friendships.
Thus, they felt that their children should learn
the skills needed to establish these relationships
and to have the confidence to take the risks to
pursue friendships. Parents identified specific
skills that they felt their children needed to de-
velop successful relationships: (a) proficiency in
the ability to discern the motives of others, (b)
skills in communication, (c) empathy, and (d)
skills in interpreting social cues.
Typically, the areas of empathy, discern-
ment, and interpreting social cues are infre-
quently addressed in social skill training programs
and curricula, not because writers do not feel that
these skills are critical, but because these skills are
often considered higher cognitive and affective
skills. Therefore, some individuals may believe
these skills are too abstract for students with dis-
abilities to conceptualize and generalize (Arthur,
Bochner, & Butterfield, 1999). Nonetheless, par-
ents in this study unanimously agreed that stu-
dents with disabilities need to develop the critical
skills of intuition, discernment, and empathy.
One father provided an example as to why it is
important for his son to have the “ability to dis-
cern [the] motives of others” (Paul):
A major emphasis in the parental
definitions of social skills was the ability
to get along with others, including the
skills needed to develop relationships
and friendships.

Nathan does not assign negative motives to any-
body. That has been a problem at school in the
past where he would do something well-mean-
ing but it [would] come back to hurt him. [Be-
cause] he has not the slightest indication of [the
realities of] everyone else, he runs the risk of
being hurt. (Paul)
CHARACTER
A major emphasis of the participants’ definition
of social skills involved aspects of character. In
this study, four parents directly connected their
meaning of social skills with qualities of character.
One of the parents discussed the components in
the district’s character education program: respect,
responsibility, fairness, citizenship, trustworthi-
ness, and making good decisions. Even though
the remaining seven parents did not directly use
the term “character,” they referred to one or more
of the above qualities of character. Jenny spoke for
many of the parents when she explained how
there was a connection between caring and re-
spect. “If you care for other people, you care for
their property; you care for the people for who
they are and what they have to offer” (Jenny).
Specifically, parents identified the character traits
of respect, responsibility, and caring as critical so-
cial skills for adolescents. They stated that these
character traits, along with skill in empathy and
motivation, are as important in the definition of
social skills as the ability to get along with others.
Parental definitions of social skills reflect
some of the dimensions addressed within the the-
ory of emotional intelligence described by Daniel
Goleman (1995). Emotional intelligence is the
ability to access and interpret a given situation ac-
curately and then to manage oneself to relate ef-
fectively with others (Goleman; Pool, 1997).
There are five dimensions of emotional intelli-
gence: self-awareness, managing emotions or self-
control, motivation, recognizing emotions in
others, and handling relationships (Bellack, 1999;
Goleman).
Although the work on emotional intelli-
gence encompasses many of the areas the study
participants identified, the results of this study do
not exactly match Goleman’s theory of emotional
intelligence. The introduction of the term charac-
ter and the importance of displaying aspects of
good character extend Goleman’s theory. How-
ever, Goleman’s work does support the specific so-
cial skills parents identified as critical:
self-awareness, empathy, self-motivation, self-con-
trol, and handling relationships.
Parental definitions of social skills also re-
flect similar dimensions addressed in self-deter-
mination skills. Wehmeyer and Schwartz
(1998) listed eight components of self-determi-
nation. Study participants identified five of the
eight (problem-solving, decision making, self-
regulation, self-awareness and knowledge, and
self-advocacy and leadership). They addressed
these components specifically and generally
within the context of their identification and
discussion of three intra/interpersonal skills
they thought were most critical to adult life:
self-control and management, self-knowledge
and awareness, and handling relationships and
getting along. However, these matches were fre-
quently not exact, with the social skills focusing
more on emotions, character, and relationships.
Self-determination diverges from these areas to
include choice making, risk- taking and safety,
and goal-setting and attainment (Browder,
Wood, Test, Karvonen, & Algozzine, 2001;
Wehmeyer & Schwartz) and focuses on the use
of the “intersecting skills” in applications that
extend beyond relationships. The skills identi-
fied by study participants also include two ad-
ditional skills beyond those they have in
common with self-determination: empathy
and moral development (i.e., character, motiva-
tion, and self-efficacy). Thus, although both
areas cover some similar skills, they diverge
from each other to form their own constella-
tions of skills.
The next section addresses the constellation
of skills identified by parents in this study. These
skills include those that intersect with emotional
intelligence and self-determination and those that
extend beyond these areas.
170 Winter 2003

C R I T I C A L S K I L L S
As parents provided their definitions of social
skills, critical skill areas began to emerge. These
skill areas fell into two broad categories: (a) inter-
personal and intrapersonal skills, and (b) moral
development. Thus, these categories form the
framework of this section.
INTERPERSONAL AND INTRAPERSONAL
Interpersonal skills involve the interpretation of
social interactions with others. The combination
of various skills such as listening, communicating,
discerning, and interpreting, help individuals bet-
ter relate and interact with other individuals
(Goleman, 1995; Taylor & Larson, 1999). Intra-
personal skills primarily involve traits or states of
individuals that help form his or her personality.
Self-knowledge is a fundamental component in
intrapersonal awareness that helps lead to greater
knowledge of and access to personal feelings
(Goleman; Taylor & Larson). The critical skills
parents identified as major areas in the category of
interpersonal and intrapersonal skills are (a) self-
awareness, (b) self-control or self-management of
emotions, (c) empathy or recognizing emotions in
others, and (d) handling relationships or getting
along with others. Parents believed these skills are
necessary for their children to develop stronger
interpersonal and intrapersonal competency.
Self-Awareness. At an early age, children be-
come more aware of their feelings (Vollmer,
Drook, & Harned, 1999) and accurately inter-
preting these feelings is an initial step in learning
to become emotionally intelligent (Goleman,
1995; Pool, 1997). Self-awareness, the ability to
recognize personal emotions (Pool), is a reflexive
process that incorporates personal self-efficacy,
self-concept, and self-esteem.
Throughout the interviews, parents often
mentioned the terms of self-esteem, self-worth,
self-concept, and self-confidence. Although we
did not seek specific definitions of these terms,
the first author asked parents to provide examples
of how these terms related to the social develop-
ment of their children. Parents stated that chil-
dren must develop a “realistic self-image” (Paul)
and be aware of their own self-perceptions. Par-
ents were concerned about the emotional and so-
cial development of their children and explained
how important it was for their sons and daughters
with high-incidence disabilities to have greater
self-confidence as well as have positive feelings
about themselves and their abilities.
In part, students learn self-awareness by un-
derstanding, controlling, and expressing their
thoughts and feelings (Taylor & Larson, 1999).
Although becoming more aware of one’s self is
more reflective of personal competence (Bellack,
1999), lessons can be taught to provide greater
opportunities to examine inner thoughts and feel-
ings (Taylor & Larson). Wendy shared how im-
portant it was for her son to “express his feelings
[and] what he’s thinking” so that he can better
control his emotions. By becoming more aware of
these emotions, Wendy’s son and other students
are then able to learn to better manage or regulate
their own emotions.
Self-Control: Managing Emotions. The abil-
ity to manage one’s emotions is directly connected
to self-regulation (Bellack, 1999) and is the sec-
ond dimension of emotional intelligence identi-
fied by Goleman (1995). The parents’ comments
reflect Goleman’s ideas in this second dimension.
They believe that if adolescents learn strategies for
better self-control, they will be better able to in-
teract positively with others and constructively re-
solve conflicts. Enhanced self-control would result
in higher levels of emotional intelligence. Higher
levels of emotional intelligence have been found
to be related to better skills in coping with nega-
tive emotions and can readily generate positive
emotions (Miller, 1997). Parents identified the six
factors that they believe were needed to be effec-
tive in self-control: initiative, enthusiasm, opti-
mism, accountability, commitment, and
self-confidence. They felt that the development of
these skills would enhance the social development
of their children. These parental views are consis-
tent with findings in other studies in which these
elements were identified as skills that assist stu-
dents with managing their emotions (Caldarella
& Merrell, 1997; Goleman, 1995, Goleman,
1999; Haager & Vaughn, 1995; Sheridan, Dee,
Morgan, McCormick, & Walker, 1996).
Parents also identified the importance of
problem-solving and decision-making skills in ef-
fectively self-managing emotions. Their concerns
are confirmed by research that identifies both
problem-solving and decision-making skills as

processes that facilitate self-management (Snyder
& Bambara, 1997) and enhance self-efficacy
(Scheier & Botvin, 1998). Problem-solving, often
viewed as an interpersonal skill (Ogilvy, 1994;
Quinn et al., 1995), involves five steps: (a) recog-
nizing there is a problem, (b) identifying solu-
tions, (c) selecting the best solution, (d) taking
action on the decided selection, and (e) evaluating
the outcome (Hall et al., 1997; Hepler, 1994; Ko-
rinek & Popp, 1997; Sheridan et al., 1996).
When parent responses are considered within the
context of these steps, parents verified the critical
need for their children to develop skills in prob-
lem identification and generating solutions and
outcomes. In summary, parents agreed that the
skills of self-regulation and self-control, which in-
corporate the areas of problem-solving, decision
making, and managing emotions should be ad-
dressed in social skills programs. Ironically, al-
though parents were concerned that their children
learn to deal with their own emotions, they were
more concerned that their children understand
the feelings and perspectives of their peers.
Empathy: Recognizing Emotions in Others.
The third area of need identified by parents was
another of Goleman’s emotional intelligence di-
mensions, recognizing emotions in others. If their
children are to have competence in this dimension,
parents stated that their children must exercise
skills in empathy, effective communication, and lis-
tening. Pam reflected parental emphasis on the
need for empathy: “[he needs] to be able to walk a
mile in the other guy’s shoes. Empathy, I suppose,
would be a way of expressing that, and it’s just so
very important when you’re relating to people to be
able to accommodate whomever you run across.”
Parents further explained how empathy, the
ability to interpret what and how another person
feels, is a skill that allows students to relate and in-
teract more effectively with their peers. Again, Pam
captured their feelings by stating, “I would wish for
him to be able to understand the world he lives in
a little bit better, how these other kids [think].
What are their criteria? What are they looking for?
What’s going to be a negative to them and what’s
going to be a positive? And for him to be able to
understand where that line is.” Several studies
(Bellack, 1999; Miller, 1997; Vollmer, Drook, &
Harned, 1999) support the critical role of empathy
in developing social competence.
Parents also indicated that they believed
that their child’s skills in empathy, intuition, and
discernment were important in accurately inter-
preting nonverbal messages. Goleman (1995) sug-
gested these parents felt that interpreting
nonverbal cues such as facial expressions, vocal
tones, and body language were necessary skills to
have when trying to recognize emotions in others.
Furthermore, they believed that learning how to
recognize the emotions of others is needed to re-
spond appropriately in social situations and per-
sonal relationships.
Handling Relationships: Getting Along With
Others. The final inter/intrapersonal skills identi-
fied by parent informants parallels Goleman’s
(1995) fifth dimension of emotional intelligence,
handling relationships. This dimension is the area
that Goleman specifically calls “social skills”; how-
ever, these parents and other researchers believe
that social skills encompass more than handling
relationships (Baumgart et al., 1991; Hall et al.,
1997; Hepler, 1994). Social skills encompass areas
such as interpersonal effectiveness (Goleman), es-
tablishing and maintaining relationships (Miller,
1997), and resolving conflict (Bellack, 1999) to
help promote positive relations with others.
Parents specifically identified the ability to
get along with others as a critical social skill.
Three themes emerged from what parents felt
were crucial skills to learn to aid in getting along
with others: (a) students need to have improved
social interaction skills, (b) students need to prac-
tice more self-assertion, and (c) students need bet-
ter relationship and friendship skills.
Consistent with the findings of Sheridan et
al. (1996), parents identified that improving so-
cial interaction skills are needed to help students
interact more appropriately with others. Specifi-
cally, students need to be able to interpret the dy-
namics of social interactions to assist them in
172 Winter 2003
Ironically, although parents were
concerned that their children learn to
deal with their own emotions, they were
more concerned that their children
understand the feelings and perspectives
of their peers.

discerning the motives of others and to correctly
understand nonverbal social cues. Similar to the
parental responses, Harrington-Lueker (1997)
found that promoting opportunities for positive
peer interaction and social training experiences
for adolescent students helps establish the founda-
tion for improved social interaction throughout
adolescence and beyond.
Assertion, a second area identified by
these parents, is also an important social skill
for students with high-incidence disabilities
(Haager & Vaughn, 1995). Assertiveness is the
ability to effectively meet one’s need through ex-
pression while respecting the rights of others
(Thompson, Bundy, & Broncheau, 1995). Be-
havioral aspects of assertion include initiating
conversations, giving and receive compliments,
and responding appropriately to comments
(Hepler, 1994). Thompson et al. report that
through social skills training adolescents can
learn assertion skills.
Finally, all parents agreed that relationships
are critical to the social and emotional develop-
ment of adolescent students. In particular, parents
reported the need to develop positive peer rela-
tions as significant in the social development of
their adolescents. Parents want their children to
have rewarding interpersonal relationships, and
they realize that their students need training in
making and maintaining friendships. The devel-
opment of friendships is often difficult for stu-
dents with disabilities; therefore, parents
suggested that adolescents need specific social
skills training in developing and maintaining
friendships with peers. Martha explained how she
felt all children would benefit from learning
friendship skills and described the difficulties
faced by many adolescents as they attempt to de-
velop friendships: “He still tends to be somewhat
of a loner. Then when he does have someone
around him, he’s just in seventh heaven and
sometimes overreacts and acts kind of goofy.”
Helping students become more adept at re-
lationships requires the development of specific
skills. To that end, parents suggested that social
skills training include the interpersonal aspects of
making friends and peer interaction skills such as
sharing, listening, complimenting, helping, and
encouraging their peers.
MORAL DEVELOPMENT
Moral development in this study included what is
commonly referred to as dispositions or what
Costa and Kallick (2000) describe as habits of
mind: “characteristics of what intelligent people
do when they are confronted with problems, the
resolutions to which are not immediately apparent”
(p. 21). During data analysis, three dispositions
emerged as significant aspects of moral develop-
ment: character, motivation, and self-efficacy.
Character. Parents asserted that the govern-
ing characteristics of determining appropriate so-
cial behavior are elements of character. Parents
stated that the areas of character that socially af-
fected their children with disabilities were exercis-
ing self-control, showing respect to others, taking
responsibility for one’s actions, and showing con-
cern for others. Additionally, parental identifica-
tion of the traits of character, specifically, respect,
responsibility, and caring, is consistent with the
core aspects noted in the research of Jones and
Stoodley (1999). In this research, these same traits
are identified as important components in charac-
ter enhancement programs for students.
Schools that desire to teach elements of char-
acter often adopt a character education program
that can be modified to address the core values that
are agreed upon by the district and community.
Adopting a character education program recognizes
the school’s commitment to develop the emotional
intelligence of students (Harrington-Lueker,
1997). Like parents in other research (Harrington-
Lueker; Vollmer et al., 1999), parents in this study
stated how critical it is for students to learn skills in
respecting others and taking responsibility. John
summarized the feelings of many parents when he
said this of responsibility:
I think if a kid knows that he [has] something to
do and he takes that responsibility, I believe that
they’re going to make it in the long run. I think
that’s a big part of undertaking something and
doing a job well. Taking the job into his own
hands and knowing what it’s like to, you know if
he does something wrong, he’s got to come back
and take the responsibility for it. (John)
Lastly, parents specifically identified caring as es-
sential to effectively interacting socially with oth-
ers. Sugai and Lewis (1996) classify skills such as
empathy, sensitivity, and caring for others as at-

tributes of social competence that assist in social
interpretation. Skills such as accurately interpret-
ing social cues are necessary to help students de-
termine the correct behavioral responses
(Thompson et al., 1995) and minimize conflict.
In this study, Tim explained how understanding
the consequences of one’s behavior is important
in determining the impact on others: The “things
that you do, can really have an effect on some-
body else’s well-being or life . . . and that’s some-
thing you want to be thinking about any time
you do anything” (Tim).
The previous attributes of character identi-
fied by this study’s parents have been cited as
being helpful in aspects of conflict awareness
(Vollmer et al., 1999). Furthermore, the parental
feedback we received coincides with the research
that identifies qualities of good character as con-
tributing factors that assist in positive peer inter-
actions (e.g., understanding the feelings and
perspectives of peers) and in helping students be-
come self-motivated learners and persons of good
mental health that are content with themselves
(Brogan & Brogan, 1999).
Motivation. Parents concurred with each
other and with other researchers (e.g., Ballantine
& Nunns, 1998; Elder, 1997) that student moti-
vation is a contributing factor in their son’s and
daughter’s obtaining academic and personal goals.
Pam explained that her son “is a very enthusiastic
person, but I do think that [it] is really important
to have enthusiasm, [a] positive outlook on things
. . . that sort of momentum [is essential] to any-
thing you do.” Parents in this study wanted their
children to have a repertoire of strategies to help
them become more motivated to make positive
changes in their lives. These parental concerns are
validated in Elder’s research, which explains how
students need to effectively manage feelings and
emotions to help elicit change in their lives. These
changes may be noticed in the areas of motiva-
tion, perseverance and goal setting. Researchers
have shown that there is a direct connection be-
tween the efforts an individual exerts and the oc-
currence of accomplishing tasks (Ballantine &
Nunns; Cummings & Haggerty, 1997; Elder;
Taylor & Larson, 1999).
Self-Efficacy. Self-efficacy is an important
contributor to the development of motivation
and perseverance. Furthermore, self-efficacy is a
belief that one has the necessary skills to compe-
tently execute social interactions (Galanki &
Kalantzi-Azizi, 1999; Thompson et al., 1995).
Parents shared how they wanted their children to
become more secure in their abilities and most
agreed that this security depended on self-confi-
dence and self-efficacy. Sara spoke for many par-
ents when she described her desire for her
daughter to become more self-efficacious: “I
want my daughter to be able to not be afraid, to
be confident in herself when it comes to other
people.” The importance of self-efficacy is under-
scored by the findings of research that concluded
that children with low perceptions of efficacy
failed to obtain their goals because they ques-
tioned their ability to perform (Ballantine &
Nunns, 1998). Therefore, self-efficacy is critical
to motivation (Bellack, 1999) and goal attain-
ment (Thompson et al.).
Self-efficacy requires individuals to become
self-aware, to develop accurate self-perception of
personal abilities, and to apply these abilities.
These skills enhance motivation (Ballantine &
Nunns, 1998; Cummings & Haggerty, 1997).
Other qualities that encourage motivation and
goal attainment are positive thinking, optimism,
enthusiasm, zeal, and self-confidence (Goleman,
1995). Students can learn strategies such as goal-
setting and making good choices that help pro-
mote success (Cummings & Haggerty). Such
strategies are employed to help students cope
(Ballantine & Nunns) with obstacles that may
lower their self-perception or prevent success
(Miller, 1997). Additionally, studies indicate that
there is a direct connection between self-efficacy
and the ability to interact and relate with peers
(Bandura, 1986; Galanaki & Kalantzi-Azizi,
1999). Clearly parental concerns about skills de-
velopment in both these areas are well founded.
I M P L I C A T I O N S F O R P R A C T I C E
One of the more significant contributions of this
study is the collection of parental perspectives re-
garding social skills that children need to learn.
For too long parents have not been heard regard-
ing the emphasis of what should and should not
be addressed in the school settings. The partici-
pants shared how they were enthusiastic to con-
174 Winter 2003

tribute their thoughts and questioned why “oth-
ers” didn’t ask for their input before. Thus, it was
clear that most of these parents wanted to work
with educators in this area. A part of working
with educators is to provide them with sugges-
tions for effective practices and modifications.
The suggestions presented in this section
are formed from the voices of the parents as they
contributed to a greater pool of content knowl-
edge. Although they were not asked to provide
this information, parents interjected their
thoughts about effective strategies and practices
when teaching social skills to students with high-
incidence disabilities. Parents identified the strate-
gies of modeling (Sheridan et al., 1996), provid-
ing corrective feedback, and role-playing (Hall et
al., 1997; Hepler, 1994; Sugai & Lewis, 1996) as
effective methods to teach their children social
skills. Furthermore, parents stated that: (a) ad-
dressing individual student needs through better
communication, (b) modifying curriculum, and
(c) involving parents as active participants are
necessary components for teaching social skills.
ADDRESSING INDIVIDUAL STUDENT NEEDS
In studies that have reviewed various IEPs, nu-
merous goals disproportionately focus on acade-
mic goals rather than social and emotional goals
for students with disabilities (Pray et al., 1992).
To address the individual needs of students, par-
ents in this study, as in other studies (Bowen,
1998; Gibb & Young, 1997; Love, 1996), identi-
fied the need for greater (a) parent and teacher
communication, and (b) teacher and student
communication.
Parents and teachers are valuable sources of
information in assessing the social competence of
children (Gibb & Young, 1997; Ruffalo & Elliott,
1997). Therefore, the need for ongoing commu-
nication is necessary to help identify the areas of
social deficits. The perceptions of parents and
teachers can vary when evaluating social compe-
tence (Ruffalo & Elliott). Therefore, increased
communications between the parents and teach-
ers are required when determining goals for a stu-
dent’s IEP.
Parent communication is also stressed in
the Goals 2000 Educate America Act, which en-
courages educators to reach out to parents to seek
their input and involvement in the social and
emotional development of children (Love, 1996).
Not only did parents in this study suggest the
need for teachers to communicate more with
them, but they also indicated that they felt teach-
ers need to pursue more communication with
their children.
Students with high-incidence disabilities
often lack the necessary skills to know how to
positively interact with their teachers (Bowen,
1998). Communication is an avenue that can
help bridge a stronger connection between the
students and teachers. Although the barriers that
prevent more opportunities for communication
may be the teacher’s issues (Taylor & Larson,
1999), teachers and students need to become
more comfortable with communicating and dis-
cussing their feelings (Goleman, 1999). By help-
ing students communicate their feelings,
educators and parents can begin to teach students
how this awareness directly relates to the student’s
ability to interact appropriately with others and
manage negative feelings (Miller, 1997).
MODIFYING CURRICULUM
Although parents stressed the importance of ad-
dressing individual student needs, they felt that
all students would benefit from learning skills
that promote positive relationships and friend-
ships. All parents in this study wanted their sons
and daughters to have healthy relationships and
friendships and felt that their involvement is
needed to help make positive changes in current
educational practice.
The parental views presented in this study
can be used to examine current practice in our
schools or current beliefs about essential social
skills. The views of the parents validate some of
the social skills that are currently stressed in the
literature and reflected in social skill programs
and curricula to date. Thus, they substantiate
some of what is currently being done in class-
rooms. However, they also offered new insights by
For too long parents have not been heard
regarding the emphasis of what should
and should not be addressed in the school
settings.

collectively identifying some social skills as being
more significant than others, especially the di-
mensions of character and emotional intelligence.
Parents also shared that schools currently
are not teaching all the critical skills they identi-
fied in this study. These parents believed that
some of these skills are being addressed but also
indicated that they thought content decisions de-
pended on the individual teacher and the amount
of time allocated certain curricular topics. One
such example is the conflict between teaching aca-
demic and nonacademic skills. Because of the in-
creased pressure placed upon schools to meet the
demand of high-stakes testing, parents provided
the following solutions for schools:
• Incorporate social skill lessons and training
through teacher modeling and teacher and stu-
dent interactions,
• Use collaborative efforts and communication
with parents to help reinforce and generalize so-
cial skills in the home and community environ-
ments.
• Weave valuable social skills content within each
academic class and nonacademic activity.
It is clear that current educational practices and
content of social curricula do not cover all the
skills parents desire their children to learn. There-
fore, school districts are encouraged to reexamine
their curricula and make necessary modifications
or additions to address the skills and moral devel-
opment that parents identified as critical social
skills for adolescents with high incidence disabili-
ties.
INVOLVING PARENTS
Parents play a critical role in social skill develop-
ment (Sheridan et al., 1996) and generalization of
social skills (Arthur et al., 1999; Sheridan et al.;
Sugai & Lewis, 1996). Therefore, all social and
emotional development programs in schools
would greatly benefit from parent involvement
(Pool, 1997). The forming of parent-professional
partnerships is an effective strategy often used to
create an educational environment for parental
involvement (O’Shea, O’Shea, Algozzine, &
Hammite, 2001). In these partnerships, parents
are actively involved in a transdisciplinary team
approach where collaborative goal-setting, assess-
ment, and planning occur with professionals to
determine the educational priorities for their chil-
dren. To create a school environment that encour-
ages parental involvement, educators need to
become aware of the family diversity within their
school community by establishing informal and
formal opportunities to communicate with par-
ents. Collaborative practices such as parent volun-
teering programs, community-based school
programs, parent’s night out, and continual
home-school communication are effective strate-
gies for influencing greater parental involvement
(O’Shea et al.). Parents in this study agreed with
Jones and Stoodley (1999) that parental involve-
ment in school and community activities provide
greater opportunities for parents to assist their
children in applying social skills to other settings.
Likewise, the parental results of this study are
consistent with the findings of Arthur et al.
(1999), acknowledging that family members have
a tremendous influence on the development of
social competence in students with high-inci-
dence disabilities.
Although the Taylor and Larson (1999)
study confirmed positive outcomes of social skills
training during adolescence, it is important to note
that the findings from Kavale and Forness (1999)
and Mathur, Kavale, Quinn, Forness, and Ruther-
ford (1998) meta-analyses suggest that social skills
interventions reflect a modest, if any, improvement
in social competence of students with high-inci-
dence disabilities. Inconsistency in assessment,
population treatment, and generalization are listed
as the possible factors inhibiting the overall effect
of social skills training on social competence of
children (Gresham et al., 2001). Similarly, Kavale
and Forness noted that inconsistency in the
amount of time and frequency of training, instru-
ments to measure skill and performance effect, and
research-developed social skills training packages
with limited pilot testing and instructional ratio-
nale were identified as possible contributors for the
lack of significant empirical support. Even though
the research on social skills training or intervention
currently has minimal empirical support, Kavale
and Forness suggest it is still important to conduct
future social skills research. They see this research
as necessary for providing insight into critical con-
tent selection and methodical issues.
176 Winter 2003

CONCLUSION
Over the years, researchers have identified vari-
ous social skills that assist individuals with high-
incidence disabilities in becoming more socially
competent. A brief overview of these identified
skills are survival skills (e.g., getting help, as-
sertiveness training, and following directions),
problem-solving and decision making skills (e.g.,
identifying problems, generating solutions, eval-
uating outcomes, and setting and accomplishing
goals), and relationship skills (e.g., initiating and
maintaining friendships, listening, and commu-
nicating; Korinek & Popp, 1997; Sugai & Lewis,
1996). These pieces are very important compo-
nents in the social development of students and
are currently addressed in most social skill pro-
grams (Erwin, 1994; Hepler, 1994). The parents
of this study agreed that these skills are impor-
tant for students to acquire, but they also identi-
fied skills they felt were equivalently critical.
According to parents in this study, students who
are truly successful during adolescence and adult
life also have the critical skills of empathy, dis-
cernment, and intuition. These are the skills that
parents felt are the most critical for students to
negotiate adolescence and adulthood. Future re-
search needs to identify the components of the
skills of intuition, discernment, and empathy.
Additionally, new research needs to examine
how to teach these skills, when to teach these
skills, and how these skills are related to each
other and other identified skills.
Finally, it seems that the focus of educa-
tion is constantly changing. New educational
standards and academic skills assessments are
the driving force in what is currently measuring
the success of our students, teachers, and
schools. Administrators and educators are feel-
ing pressured to prove student progress by test
scores and student performance. Moreover,
communities are reactively responding to their
local school district’s test results. At the same
time, new research on character education pro-
grams and emotional intelligence reveal the sig-
nificance that social skills training has in
ensuring student social competence and success
in the job market. Many of the themes identi-
fied in this study directly correlate with the
components emphasized in emotional intelli-
gence (Goleman, 1995), presenting the need for
greater social skills instruction in our schools.
Thus, there appears to be a growing problem.
When emphasis is placed on achieving academic
standards and higher test scores, little time is
left in the school day to address the nonacade-
mic needs of our students.
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A B O U T T H E A U T H O R S
SHARON M. KOLB (CEC #832), Assistant
Professor, Department of Special Education, Uni-
versity of Wisconsin-Whitewater. CHERYL
HANLEY-MAXWELL, Professor, Department
of Special Education, University of Wisconsin-
Madison.
Correspondence may be addressed to Sharon M.
Kolb, Department of Special Education, Winther
Hall, 4039, 800 W. Main Street, University of
Wisconsin-Whitewater, WI 53190-1790. Office:
262-472-4831, Fax: 262-472-2843, Email:
kolbs@mail.uww.edu
Manuscript received June 2001; accepted May
2002
* To order books referenced in this journal, please
call 24 hrs/365 days: 1-800-BOOKS-NOW
(266-5766); or 1-732-728-1040; or visit them on
the Web at http://www.BooksNow.com/Excep-
tional Children.htm. Use Visa, M/C, AMEX,
Discover, or send check or money order + $4.95
S&H ($2.50 each add'l item) to: Clicksmart, 400
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