This document discusses skills for questioning, paraphrasing, and providing feedback during active listening. It outlines four main types of questions: indirect questions, open-ended questions, closed-ended questions, and reflective questions. It then discusses paraphrasing, including benefits and tips for paraphrasing effectively. Finally, it covers providing feedback, noting that feedback helps people change behavior or messages and outlines tips for giving appropriate feedback, including using "I" statements and empathetic language.

1. SKILL OF QUESTIONING ,
PARAPHRASING AND PROVIDING
FEEDBACK
SRUTHI .C.K
B. ED MALAYALAM
PKM COLLEGE OF EDUCATION

2. A too-often-missing ingredient in
dialogue is listening.
We get to talk. But first we have
to listen.

3. Students should be encouraged,
while listening, to formulate and
ask questions to help them better
understand what the speaker is
saying.

4. THE ART OF QUESTIONING
FOUR MAIN TYPES OF QUESTIONS ARE:
Indirect Questions
Open-ended Questions
Closed-ended Questions
Reflective Questions

5. • (e.g., “Would you like to elaborate on that?” “What
would happen if?” Could you tell me more?”).
• These avoid directing the speaker and instead let her
or him explain things more fully from their point of view.
Indirect
Questions
• that invite further conversation (e.g., “How? What?
Where? Who? Which?”).Open-ended
Questions
• that prompt for specifics, to get clarification (e.g., lead
with: “Is? Are? Do? Did? Can? Could? Would?”).
• The goal is to ask for specifics in ways that encourage
the other participant’s exploration and articulation of
their facts and evidence, without challenging them
directly.
Closed-ended
Questions
• that reassure participants that you empathize and invite
them to expand on what they said if they wish.
• They’re often used for issues that are emotionally
evocative
• (e.g., “I see you feel very strongly about this. Do you
want to tell me more about it?”).
Reflective
Questions

6. PARAPHRASING
The dictionary definition of paraphrase is
Express the meaning of (the writer or
speaker or something written or spoken)
using different words, especially to
achieve greater clarity.

7. There are
several benefits
to
paraphrasing
at the close of a
conversation.
It forces you to
reflect on what
just happened.
This leads to
deeper
introspection
and
retrospection
getting a better
understanding
of the issue or
situation at
hand.

8. •
Tips on how to
paraphrase
when
communicating
The focus of the paraphrase
should be on what the speaker
implied, not on what you
wanted them to imply.
For example, a better way to
say, “I think what you mean to
say is ...” is replacing it with,
“If I am hearing you right, you
mean that…?”
Try to use some of the words
that the other person has
used.
By choosing the words used
by the person speaking and
coming to a clear common
understanding is one of the
primary goals of
paraphrasing.
paying attention to their body
language, their expressions
and their emotions in
addition to their words.
Phrasing the paraphrase as a
question is also a helpful
technique, “You are saying
that…?”, so that the speaker
has the responsibility and
opportunity to clarify their
original comments in
response to your question.
Put the ownership of the
paraphrase on yourself, for
example, “If I am hearing you
right…?” or “If I understand
you correctly…?” This makes
the other person not as
defensive, and hence more
open to the conversation.

9. Tips on how to
paraphrase
when
communicating
Put the focus of the
paraphrase on the other
person, for example, if the
person said, “I don’t have
enough time to do what I
want,” then don’t
paraphrase, “We all don't
have enough time, right?”
Try not to evaluate or judge
the other person’s
comments. For example,
not a good idea to say, “Do
you really think that is
true?” or “I think it is
unfair to make that
comment.”
You could use a paraphrase
to validate your impression
of the other person's
comments. For example, it
would be okay to name
their feelings by saying,
“You seemed frustrated on
hearing…?”
If the other person
responds to your
paraphrase that you still
don’t understand them,
give them a few more
chances to restate their
position.
❖ As much as possible,
attempt to keep the
paraphrase shorter than
the original comments
made.

10. PROVIDINGFEEDBACK
Feedback is a key component of
active listening. Feedback can be a
corrective mechanism for helping an
individual learn how well his or her
behaviour matches the original
intention. It can also be a means of
establishing one's
identity. Feedback helps another person
to consider changing behaviour or
altering a message.

11. FEEDBACK HELPS ANOTHER PERSON TO CONSIDER CHANGING BEHAVIOR
OR ALTERING A MESSAGE.
 IT IS COMMUNICATION WITH A PERSON (GROUP) THAT GIVES THAT
PERSON INFORMATION ABOUT HOW HE OR SHE AFFECTS OTHERS.
FEEDBACK HELPS AN INDIVIDUAL STAY "ON TARGET" AND THUS BETTER
ACHIEVE A GOAL OR PURPOSE.
AN ACTIVE LISTENER MUST BE SOLICITED FOR A RESPONSE BY THE
SENDER AND MUST REFRAIN FROM IMPOSING UNINVITED RESPONSES.
FEEDBACK IS MOST USEFUL WHEN THE SENDER ASKS FOR RESPONSE BY
FORMULATING A QUESTION THAT A LISTENER CAN ANSWER.

12. "TIPS" THAT WILL HELP YOU RESPOND APPROPRIATELY DURING
ACTIVE LISTENING
YOU SHOULD USE LANGUAGE THAT:
 OBJECTIVELY DESCRIBES ANOTHER PERSON'S MESSAGE, BEHAVIOUR, OR SITUATION.
 FEEDBACK MUST BE SPECIFIC RATHER THAN GENERAL.
 DESCRIBES HOW THE OTHER PERSON'S BEHAVIOUR, MESSAGE, OR SITUATION CONCRETELY AFFECTS YOUR
LIFE.
 FEEDBACK MUST BE DIRECTED TOWARD SOMETHING THE RECEIVER CAN DO TO CHANGE THE SITUATION.
 FRUSTRATION RESULTS WHEN A PERSON IS REMINDED OF SHORTCOMINGS OVER WHICH HE OR SHE HAS
NO CONTROL.
 DESCRIBES YOUR OWN FEELINGS AND AVOIDS EVALUATIVE LANGUAGE. BY DESCRIBING YOUR OWN
REACTIONS, AN INDIVIDUAL IS FREE TO USE, OR NOT USE, THE FEEDBACK YOU OFFER.
 AVOIDING EVALUATIVE LANGUAGE REDUCES THE LIKELIHOOD THAT AN INDIVIDUAL WILL REACT
DEFENSIVELY.
 FEEDBACK MUST TAKE INTO ACCOUNT THE NEEDS OF BOTH THE GIVER AND THE RECEIVER.
 DESCRIBES WHAT YOU WANT THE OTHER PERSON TO DO. FOR EXAMPLE, OFFER AN EXPLANATION, CHANGE
BEHAVIOUR, OR PROVIDE SUGGESTIONS FOR SOLVING A PROBLEM.

13. OTHER WAYS OF RESPONDING APPROPRIATELY RELATE TO THE VERBS YOU
CHOOSE IN YOUR RESPONSE
• USE "I WANT" STATEMENTS SUCH AS: "I WANT YOU TO DO THIS."
• EFFECTS: HELPS CLARIFY WHAT YOU REALLY WANT FOR YOURSELF AND FOR OTHERS.
• USE "I FEEL" STATEMENTS SUCH AS: "I FEEL X WHEN YOU DO Y."
• EFFECTS: THESE STATEMENTS HELP EXPRESS FEELINGS WITHOUT ATTACKING THE SELF-ESTEEM OF ANOTHER
PERSON. WHEN EXPRESSING IRRITATION, FOR EXAMPLE, FIRST DESCRIBE THE SPECIFIC BEHAVIOR, AND THEN
EXPRESS YOUR FEELINGS.
• USE MIXED FEELING STATEMENTS:
• EFFECTS: MIXED FEELING STATEMENTS EXPRESS POSITIVE AND NEGATIVE FEELINGS AT THE SAME TIME. THEY
ALLOW TIME FOR AN INDIVIDUAL TO RESPOND AFTER YOU EXPRESS THE FIRST FEELING. EXPRESS POSITIVE
FEELINGS FIRST, GIVE AN INDIVIDUAL TIME TO RESPOND, AND THEN EXPRESS NEGATIVE FEELINGS.
• USE EMPATHIC FEELING STATEMENTS:
• EFFECTS: EMPATHIC FEELING STATEMENTS DO MORE THAN JUST EXPRESS YOUR WANTS AND FEELINGS BY
CONVEYING SENSITIVITY TOWARD OTHERS. AVOID USING THE STATEMENT, "I KNOW HOW YOU FEEL,"
BECAUSE IT DENIES THE OTHER PERSON HIS OR HER FEELINGS.
• USE CONFRONTATIONAL STATEMENTS FOR DISCREPANCIES:
• EFFECTS: CONFRONTATION IS APPROPRIATE WHEN THERE ARE DISCREPANCIES. FOR INSTANCE, WHEN
ANOTHER PERSON'S WORDS CONTRADICT WHAT HE OR SHE DOES. ANOTHER EXAMPLE WOULD BE WHEN
THERE IS A CONFLICT BETWEEN A JOB DESCRIPTION AND WHAT IS BEING ASKED OF SOMEONE IN A JOB.

14. THANK YOU