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DEALING WITH
DIFFICULT PEOPLE
2/14/2012
2
LET’S KNOW……
WHY ARE PEOPLE DIFFICULT?
 People feel
 Rushed — not enough time
 Insecure
 Angry
 And have some need or interest
Stressed!!!
2/14/2012
3
TYPES OF “PEOPLE”
 INTENT:
 To get things done
 To get things right
 NEED:
 Control
 Perfection
 INTENT:
 - To get along
 - To get appreciated
 NEED:
 - Approval
 - Attention
TASK FOCUSED PEOPLE FOCUSED:
2/14/2012
4
A DIFFICULT PERSON CAN BE ...
 The Tank
 The Sniper
 The Know-It-All
 The Think-They-Know-It-All
 The Yes Person
 The No Person
 The Maybe Person
 The Whiner
2/14/2012
5
THE TANK
 Saying Harsh words with smile
 Don’t counterattack!.
 Don’t defend, explain, or
justify
 Don’t shut down
WHO ARE THEY????
HOW TO DEAL WITH
THEM????
 Bullies their way toward
the results they want.
 Belittles you in front of
anyone.
 Tries to convince you that you
are doing a poor job when you
are doing fine.
2/14/2012
6
SNIPER
 Hide their real face.
 Identify your weaknesses and
using them against you,
through sabotage and gossip .
 Stop, Look, & Backtrack.
 Don’t overreact.
 Go on a grievance patrol.
 Suggest a civil future.
WHO ARE THEY??
HOW TO DEAL WITH
THEM??
2/14/2012
7
THE KNOW-IT-ALL
 Controls people and events by
dominating conversation with
lengthy, imperious arguments.
 Tries to find flaws in
everything.
 Be prepared and know your
stuff.
 Present your views indirectly.
 Turn them into mentors.
WHO ARE THEY??
HOW TO DEAL WITH
THEM??
2/14/2012
8
THE THINK-THEY-KNOW-IT-ALL
(EXPERT)
 Although these people don’t
know that much, they don’t let
that get in the way. If you don’t
know much about what they’re
talking about, they may
mislead you into trouble.
 Give them a little attention.
 Tell it like it is.
 Give them a break.
 Break the cycle.
WHO ARE THEY??
HOW TO DEAL WITH
THEM??
2/14/2012
9
THE YES-PERSON
 Answers “Yes” to every
request without thinking about
what is being promised .
 Say “Yes” to please people
 To avoid confrontations.
 Don’t place blame
 Be patient
 Ensure commitment
 Strengthen the relationship.
WHO ARE THEY??
HOW TO DEAL WITH
THEM??
2/14/2012
10
THE NO-PERSON
 No- Person is task-focused.
 Perfection is his/her
standard.
 Finds negatives.
 Go with the flow.
 Leave the door open.
 Be patient.
 Appreciate the No Person.
WHO ARE THEY??
HOW TO DEAL WITH
THEM??
2/14/2012
11
THE MAYBE PERSON
 Unable to make decision.
 Put off the difficult decision,
hoping that a better choice will
come up.
 Establish a comfort zone.
 Use a decision-making
process.
 Don’t push the Maybe Person.
 Stay calm.
WHO ARE THEY??
HOW TO DEAL WITH
THEM??
2/14/2012
12
THE WHINER
 Usually complaints a lot.
 Avoids taking responsibility.
 Wants sympathy.
 Has negative view of the
world.
 Cousins to No-People.
WHO ARE THEY??
HOW TO DEAL WITH
THEM??
 Listen for the main points.
 Interrupt and get specific.
 Don’t agree or disagree with
Whiners.
 Don’t try to solve Whiners’
problems.
 Don’t ask Whiners why they’re
complaining:
2/14/2012
13
“While you can’t change difficult people, you can
communicate with them in such a way that they
change themselves. It’s a matter of knowing how
to get through to them when they’re behaving
badly.”
2/14/2012
14
2/14/2012
15

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How to Handle Difficult People

  • 3. LET’S KNOW…… WHY ARE PEOPLE DIFFICULT?  People feel  Rushed — not enough time  Insecure  Angry  And have some need or interest Stressed!!! 2/14/2012 3
  • 4. TYPES OF “PEOPLE”  INTENT:  To get things done  To get things right  NEED:  Control  Perfection  INTENT:  - To get along  - To get appreciated  NEED:  - Approval  - Attention TASK FOCUSED PEOPLE FOCUSED: 2/14/2012 4
  • 5. A DIFFICULT PERSON CAN BE ...  The Tank  The Sniper  The Know-It-All  The Think-They-Know-It-All  The Yes Person  The No Person  The Maybe Person  The Whiner 2/14/2012 5
  • 6. THE TANK  Saying Harsh words with smile  Don’t counterattack!.  Don’t defend, explain, or justify  Don’t shut down WHO ARE THEY???? HOW TO DEAL WITH THEM????  Bullies their way toward the results they want.  Belittles you in front of anyone.  Tries to convince you that you are doing a poor job when you are doing fine. 2/14/2012 6
  • 7. SNIPER  Hide their real face.  Identify your weaknesses and using them against you, through sabotage and gossip .  Stop, Look, & Backtrack.  Don’t overreact.  Go on a grievance patrol.  Suggest a civil future. WHO ARE THEY?? HOW TO DEAL WITH THEM?? 2/14/2012 7
  • 8. THE KNOW-IT-ALL  Controls people and events by dominating conversation with lengthy, imperious arguments.  Tries to find flaws in everything.  Be prepared and know your stuff.  Present your views indirectly.  Turn them into mentors. WHO ARE THEY?? HOW TO DEAL WITH THEM?? 2/14/2012 8
  • 9. THE THINK-THEY-KNOW-IT-ALL (EXPERT)  Although these people don’t know that much, they don’t let that get in the way. If you don’t know much about what they’re talking about, they may mislead you into trouble.  Give them a little attention.  Tell it like it is.  Give them a break.  Break the cycle. WHO ARE THEY?? HOW TO DEAL WITH THEM?? 2/14/2012 9
  • 10. THE YES-PERSON  Answers “Yes” to every request without thinking about what is being promised .  Say “Yes” to please people  To avoid confrontations.  Don’t place blame  Be patient  Ensure commitment  Strengthen the relationship. WHO ARE THEY?? HOW TO DEAL WITH THEM?? 2/14/2012 10
  • 11. THE NO-PERSON  No- Person is task-focused.  Perfection is his/her standard.  Finds negatives.  Go with the flow.  Leave the door open.  Be patient.  Appreciate the No Person. WHO ARE THEY?? HOW TO DEAL WITH THEM?? 2/14/2012 11
  • 12. THE MAYBE PERSON  Unable to make decision.  Put off the difficult decision, hoping that a better choice will come up.  Establish a comfort zone.  Use a decision-making process.  Don’t push the Maybe Person.  Stay calm. WHO ARE THEY?? HOW TO DEAL WITH THEM?? 2/14/2012 12
  • 13. THE WHINER  Usually complaints a lot.  Avoids taking responsibility.  Wants sympathy.  Has negative view of the world.  Cousins to No-People. WHO ARE THEY?? HOW TO DEAL WITH THEM??  Listen for the main points.  Interrupt and get specific.  Don’t agree or disagree with Whiners.  Don’t try to solve Whiners’ problems.  Don’t ask Whiners why they’re complaining: 2/14/2012 13
  • 14. “While you can’t change difficult people, you can communicate with them in such a way that they change themselves. It’s a matter of knowing how to get through to them when they’re behaving badly.” 2/14/2012 14