1) This document outlines the agenda and topics for a class on interpersonal dynamics and feelings and feedback. 2) The class will discuss emotions, how they serve us individually and as a species, and how emotional and threat responses can impact feedback and relationships. 3) Students will learn models for managing feelings and threats, including the SCARF model of social threats, and will practice giving and receiving feedback through exercises with partners and groups.

1. Interpersonal
Photo by Steven Depolo [link]
Dynamics
Ed Batista
Class 4:
FEELINGS &
FEEDBACK

2. First 2 hours here
• Pairs & half-groups
• Discussion & an exercise
Last hour in T-group
Agenda
Photo by Theresa Thompson [link]

3. Photo by Juhan Sonin [link]
With your partner

4. With your partner
Vocabulary of Emotions
What emotions do I have difficulty feeling?
What emotions do I have difficulty expressing?

5. Social identity
Photo by Neon Tommy [link]

6. With your partner
What social identities influence my experience
and comfort level with emotions?

7. Debrief
What did you learn?
What conclusions are you drawing?

8. Emotion
Photo by Jill M [link]

9. Emotion
What role do emotions serve interpersonally?
Bradford & Huckabay
Convey crucial information & signify importance
Allow us to be known
Early warning system

10. Emotion
How do emotions serve us as a species?
Antonio Damasio, USC

11. Emotion
Emotions evolved to support survival
Uncontrolled emotion can lead us astray

12. Emotion

13. Emotion
Emotion is integral to reasoning
Essential for efficient decision-making

14. Emotion
Victor Johnston, New Mexico State
“Discriminant hedonic amplifiers”
Boost signals in our mental landscape
This is why…

15. Emotions are
attention magnets
Photo by Garrett Mace [link]

16. Emotion
Joseph LeDoux, NYU
“A quick and dirty signal”
Neural pathways 2x
But speed has a price…

17. Emotion
Photo by Ed Yourdon [link]

18. Emotion
Rapid triggering
Reflexive responses
Sensing ≠ Comprehension

19. Can I give you
some feedback?

20. Can I give you
Photo by Robbie Grubbs [link]
some feedback?

21. Why is feedback
Photo by Robbie Grubbs [link]
so stressful?

22. Feedback and
Photo by Mykl Roventine [link]
social threat

23. Photo by State Farm [link]
Threat response
Fight, flight or freeze

24. Photo by State Farm [link]
Threat response
Physiological
Adrenaline & cortisol
Optimized for strength & speed

25. Photo by State Farm [link]
Threat response
Emotional
Fear & anger
Primed for snap judgments

26. Photo by State Farm [link]
Threat response
Cognitive
Negativity bias
Impairment & diminished capacity

27. Social threat
Photo by David Sim [link]
Some social situations ≈ Physical threats
Same response
Physiological
Emotional
Cognitive

28. Photo by Andrew Vargas [link]
SCARF model
David Rock, NeuroLeadership Institute
What social situations trigger a threat response?

29. SCARF model
Status
Photo by the National Guard [link]

30. SCARF model
Status
Certainty
Photo by Amy Ashcraft [link]

31. SCARF model
Status
Certainty
Autonomy
Photo by Charles Hoffman [link]

32. SCARF model
Status
Certainty
Autonomy
Relatedness
Photo by Don-Pixel [link]

33. SCARF model
Status
Certainty
Autonomy
Relatedness
Fairness
Photo by JMTImages [link]

34. With your partner
When do I experience social threat & why?
What factors are most triggering for me?

35. Status
Certainty
Autonomy
Relatedness
Fairness
SCARF model

36. Status
Certainty
Autonomy
Relatedness
Fairness

37. Social identity
Photo by Neon Tommy [link]

38. Challenge
yourself
Photo by Daniel Oines [link]

39. With your partner
How might status & relatedness affect me here?

40. Debrief
What did you learn?
What conclusions are you drawing?

41. Photo by Andrew Vargas [link]
Use the model

42. Reframe the experience
Offering feedback ≠ Higher status
Emphasize choice & agency
Build the relationship*
Remember the Net
When getting
feedback

43. When giving
Avoid a threat response
Be mindful of perceived status
More certainty & autonomy
Build the relationship*
Remember the Net
feedback

44. Photo by Sabri Yildiz [link]
Get a new T-group
partner

45. Photo by Harsha KR [link]
Relationships

46. Relationships
John Gottman
What characterizes successful relationships?

47. Relationships
Feeling known by the other
A culture of appreciation
Responding to bids
Mutual influence
A soft start*

48. A soft start
Photo by Phil McElhinney [link]
Not like this

49. A soft start
Photo by Oakley Originals [link]
Like this

50. Begin with authentic positive intent
Emphasize mutual goals
A soft start

51. 3 triggers
Photo by Wendy [link]
Stone & Heen, Harvard Program on Negotiation
What blocks feedback?
What triggers defensiveness?

52. 3 triggers
Photo by Wendy [link]
Truth
Relationship
Identity

53. With your partner
Photo by Wendy [link]
Truth
Relationship
Identity
How do these triggers affect me?
What do they feel like personally?

54. Form half-groups
Photo by Christine Majul [link]

55. Have your
Stone, Patton & Heen
How can we manage feelings more effectively?
(Manage ≠ Suppress)
feelings…

56. In your half-
What does it mean…
…to negotiate with my feelings?
…to express my feelings fully & carefully?
groups

57. Next steps
T-group until 5:50pm & again tonight
(See you tonight, Group 3!)
Week 4 Post-Group Assignment due Thurs @ Noon
Week 5 Readings & Class Notes on Canvas
Week 5 Pre-Class Assignment due Mon @ Noon
Next class Feb 7, 3pm here

58. An exercise
Photo by Very Quiet [link]

59. Non-verbal
Photo by Very Quiet [link]
disclosure

60. Non-verbal
5: Feelings About Each Other
Photo by Rita Willaert [link]
disclosure

61. Off to T-group
Photo by Pic Basement [link]