Roman Humeniuk: Communication issues and their consequences in the day-to-day work (UA)
Ukraine Online PMDay 2023 Winter
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2. 7+ years in ІT
Roles - QA Ops DevOps .NET Dev
Scrum Master Engineering Project
Manager
Roman Humeniuk
3. Communication purposes
Informative
1 ● notification, communication, transfer or addition of information, notifications
Convincing
2 ● to influence someone, to receive something
Exhibition
3 ● attracting attention, arousing interest, window dressing
Educational
4 ● give advice, explain, learn
Entertaining
5 ● distract, cheer up, fill time
Feedback
6 ● is used, which is determined by the reaction of one side to the received message
6. I don’t like such relation to myself but I won’t tell about that because
I “don’t want to push on somebody don’t want to be such a human”
I communicate info as I know with an expectation that it is
acceptable and ok for all of us (jokes, bad words, high voice)
I’ll have accumulative emotional effect that brings me to start a
conflict
I clearly don’t understand an issue since for me it’s ok. But now I’m
also angry that you push on me Background
7. Hi. Here is a task you should do!
I’m starting my work on this task. I see “risks opened questions
blockers” but I won’t raise them “to not look like a loser to show
myself as an expert other reason”
DD is coming. Issue is not fixed. Consequences are worse
than expected.
I’m really angry since expectations are failed. I
need to re-do some stuff Your
expectations
8. Hi. Here is a task you should do!
I’m starting my work on this task. I see that it is underestimated but
I won’t raise them because I want to show myself as a hero expert
I have overtimes, I do a sacrifice. Everybody needs to
appreciate that
Task is done. Let’s move on.
Nobody appreciates my work. I’m angry and upset
My
expectations
9. I’m saying a bad joke related
to the person and
understood it too late
I hear a joke and ignore it
I accept that as “unsaid” deal and trying to do
something good to fix it based on our deal
I’m also angry since I thought we had a deal
and I’ve done what I thought to fix it
I’m still angry and upset with
accumulative emotional effect
Assumptions
10. Hi. Let’s discuss what should
be done in scope of the task!
We are doing some discussions on words
Ok, sure. Let’s do it!
1 week after commitment we don’t remember
exactly how it was aligned but we assume
that it should be done like that
We failed a task due to the difference in
things to be done
Alignment
11. My solution here is correct
I disagree, it should be done in this way
I start to scream because this is how I
resolve a conflict
We have destructive conflict with further
communication dysfunctions, like offends
I’m making fun of your solution since I
do it like this
Negotiation
12. I tell you some bad stuff
about our colleague
I disagree but don’t say that to not fail all
relationship
For me it is an acceptance of my opinion
I found out what you are talking about
me and angry on both of you
I didn’t have that opinion and not guilty
in this situation but I’m responsible as a
part of the dialog
Responsibility
13. Hi guys. We have this problem.
What should we do?
Ok, here what I can propose you in
direct message
We decide everything in the
chat
Transparency
We found what you’ve done and we
disagree and upset you didn’t share
You didn’t answer on the message
and we didn’t share
14. I have a problem and write
to my colleague
I’m busy have a lunch and don’t
answer quickly
I’m angry because you didn’t answer me on
time
I’m angry because I do not need to
answer you immediately
SLA
15. I have a problem and write
to my colleague
I have a vacation sickness and don’t
answer you
I’m angry because I didn’t know the reason
you didn’t answer me
I’m angry because I have a
vacation when I don’t need to do
working activities Agreements
16. Hi. I said, It should be
changed
I don’t like such communication
approach
I get a response not in time or have future
conflict
I’m trying to move out of the activity or
to make a delay
Business
communication
17. He will not become a good
engineer
She’s trying to show off herself
She doesn’t care about the job
He is stupid
Judgments
19. Communication context
The current emotional
mood of the participants
Background - Age, previous experience,
education, intelligence, perception,
imagination, thinking, learning ability,
adaptability, resilience, etc.
Motivational setting
(needs, interests,
values, expectations)
Their properties that affect emotional
reactions in the long term
(temperament, cognitive style,
empathy level, complexes)
Relationship between
participants in the
communication process
Social Status & Role
External reasons
related to Time &
Place
20. Update flow
a. Should I let my colleagues know that I left work place, if so, how?
i. This is the foundation for a conflict that can be avoided before it begins
b. If you have a question from someone in a chat, maybe you should respond to it, even if there is no answer, say something
like "I don’t know" and not just keep quiet?
i. Otherwise, silence in response to questions in a chat can become a habit
c. Maybe you should turn on auto reply and change the status to OOO, if there is a holiday or vacation?
Agreements
Status & Communication rules
a. Maybe let’s have 0-tolerance on the feedback flow?
b. Should I somehow inform people that I'm busy right now and it’s better not touch me?
c. Maybe you should have a common communication channel and not address issues in personal
correspondence?
d. Maybe it's worth forming an agenda for meetings and writing follow-ups afterwards?
e. Maybe you should inform people in advance about the need for help or advice?
f. Maybe we should decide when we start the working day, and especially when we finish?
i. Because the statistics of remote work do not lie - people transplant, which is also not good
SLA’s
a. What is the time limit for responding to people in different situations?
i. For example - for urgent questions the answer should be within an hour, for super urgent - you
can immediately call a mobile and so on
21. Active Listening
Ignoring
Pretended listening
(Patronizing)
Selective listening
Attentive listening
Empathic listening
If you have ever been ignored there is no doubt about it. You
are talking but the other person is not giving any attention to
what you are saying
To truly hear someone takes time and attention. Pretend
listeners give you the impression they hear what you say, and
they may hear some of your words, but they are not "present."
The next level is selective listening. The person who listens
selectively only wants part of the message, but not all. They
are probably the person who says, "So, what's your point?"
Attentive listeners offer their time and attention. But they don't
try to put themselves in the other person's shoes.
Empathic listening is intentional. The person who develop this
skill listens not only to the other person's words, they listen for
what the other person means
At the first four (4) levels, the listener
hears with their own frame of reference
in mind.
But it is at Level 5 that true
communication occurs. This is where
the listener attempts to see things
from the other person's perspective or
point of view, not with your own
filter/lense.
22. Powerful questions
What is at
risk?
What is
important
about that?
What might
help look like?
What would a
simpler way
look like?
What’s the worst
best that could
happen?
What would an
experiment look
like?
Which part is confusing
surprising annoying
you?
What’s already
working that you
can build on?
How do you want
it to be?
What is stopping
you?
If you got it, what
would you have?
In the bigger scheme
of things, how
important it is?
In the beginning,
how did you want it
to be?
What is the
lesson from
that?
When is it time to
action?
What is your
prediction?
Whose opinion
matters in this
topic?
Low power High power
Yes / No Where Which When Who How What Why?
https://medium.c
om/the-liberators
/how-to-use-pow
erful-questions-v
irtually-46a76096
630a
27. Emotional Quotient & Vitality quotient
Vitality & Rank potential
Energy Level
Hormones impact on behaviour
Physiology aspect
I'm ok, you're ok model
Parent-adult-child model
Transactional Analysis
DISC & PAEI Profiles
Maturity models
Behaviour patterns
28. Communication tips & tricks
We don’t have requirements
Who can assist us with requirements?
Do it
Can you please assist us with this activity?
It is not working
We’ve made this & this. It didn’t help. We propose
this
It is critical problem
It is an issue with high importance
Hi. Thanks. Bye.
Good afternoon. Many thanks, much appreciate
that. Best Regards.
You are wrong
Let’s look on it from this perspective
Will you do this?
Activity is next. Risks are next. DD is next
I need to think
As a team we should brainstorm this