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Theories, Issues and Trends in the
                      21st Century
   Monday – Dating History and Socialization

   Tuesday – Diversity and Theories of Attraction

   Wednesday – Theories Cont’d and Marriage

   Thursday – Technology and 21st Century Dating

   Friday – In-Class Assignment:“21st Century Guide
    to Dating”
 How   has dating evolved?

 Social   and Historical Changes

 The   Role of Dating in Socialization

 Dating   Process and Definitions
 What  social rules exist in the dating world of
  the 1950s?
 Unwritten rules or social pressures?
 How are these rules similar from 60 years
  ago? How are they different?

 Do you think these rules
and pressures exist today?
 Datingseems natural and normal to us, but
 many social and historical factors had to
 occur before dating could go “mainstream”.

 1920s– College students and young adults
 began dating

 1940s-50s – Became acceptable for
 teenagers to date.
o 1800s

o Rural to Urban transition

o Proximity in urban areas

o Technological
advancement

o Increased Transportation

o Increase in social life
o The invention of the
telephone

o Easy, frequent
communication

o Distance isn’t as great a
factor

o 1930s-40s most households
would have a phone!
(Possibly a shared line)
 WWI    and II, Women’s Rights

 Withmen away at war, women’s roles, jobs
 and image of themselves completely
 changed!

 Women’s   education, the
right to vote, and new found
independence.
 1960s   and 70s

 Protest and discussion
changed our understanding
of intimate relationships.

 Power  and gender
roles – dynamics of
dating and the family.
 1990s-2000s
 Socialization  – process of gaining knowledge,
 skills and attitudes required to participate
 actively in a society.

 School– 1st social contacts outside the
 family. Includes, friends, acquaintances, and
 later on intimate relationships.

 Schooland these social contacts act as an
 introduction to formal procedures of mate
 selection.
 Free-Choice Mate Selection – two people
 are attracted to each other, fall in love, and
 get married!

 Other influences: Economic reasons,
 stability/support, companionship, status ...

 Canadian Beliefs: Long-lasting relationships
 based on mutual attraction and love, rather
 than hard-wired biology.
   Knowledge about dating and intimacy begins in school
    but takes time to develop. Kids may have comical,
    unusual, or even realistic view of dating!
 De-emphasizing mate selection.
“Hanging out” or “getting together”.

 Intimate friendships
and sharing.

 Common basis of friendships
and relationships (respect,
Common interests ect)

   Dating for social purposes, or because of social
    pressures
 Entertainment,   Recreation and Socializing

 “Hanging   out”, hooking up, getting together

 Casual   Dating or “Dating Around”

 “Going
       steady”, more
 commitment, boyfriend or girlfriend status.

 Long-term,   engagement, or even marriage.
 Monogamy      – two committed partners get
    married – a life-long relationship.

 Serial   Monogamy – marriage to several
    spouses one after another. Comes as a result
    of divorce and separation.

    Polygamy – one man or woman married to
    two or more partners. (a punishable offense
    in Canada, but common in other countries)
   Who – you and two other group members

   What – creating a “How-To Guide” for dating in
    the 21st Century

   Where/When – Friday In-Class (Due Monday 26th)

   Why – to demonstrate your knowledge of
    Theories of Attraction and dating issues

   How – Using “scrapbook”/written, video, or
    power point form.
DAT
E
Why and how do we choose
        intimate partners?
Marc Johns’ “United Dates of America” – National Geographic.
“They combed profiles
from dating websites all
across the US, and
pulled the most
commonly used terms
from each zip code and
mapped them. What
ends up surfacing are
some regional
stereotypes ('oil' in
Texas, 'retired' in
Florida), as well as
some amusing terms
(Cleopatra? Yodeling?
Marshmellow,
anyone?).” - Marc Johns
• What information
can we gather from
a study like this?


• How is this data
important to the
study of attraction
and dating?


•What can we learn
from it?
 Free-Choice Mate Selection – two people
 are attracted to each other, fall in love, and
 get married!

 Monogamy   – two committed partners get
 married – a life-long relationship.

 SerialMonogamy – marriage to several
 spouses one after another. Comes as a result
 of divorce and separation.
  Evolutionary psychology (Darwinian)
 What we find attractive is prehistorically
  determined.

 The    “best” or most advantageous physical
    traits (fit, strong, fastest, child-bearing) are
    found to be attractive.

 Most   attractive = most likely to survive,
    and therefore reproduce for generations.
 Exchange     of valuable reproductive resources.

 Individualpreferences regarding an
 attractive mate (what is needed to survive?)

 Competition  to attain the most attractive
 (most likely to survive) mate.
 Passion   – physical attraction, sexual desire

 Intimacy – intense friendship which develops
 slowly through sharing, and a willingness to
 meet other’s needs.

 Commitment   – As the rewards of relationship
 grow, partner is more likely to maintain the
 relationship.
 Individualsare attracted to those with a
 similar social background.

 Attractiveness rating is influenced by similar
 social positions (age, race, status, religion
 and political views).

 Physicalsameness is also a variable in
 attraction.
 Explainshow attraction between different
 races/ethnicities occurs because of similar
 social environment.
 We   marry/select people that we know.

 Highschool sweethearts, work
 acquaintances, church community, college,
 university group.

 The more often you see someone, the more
 likely you are to form a relationship –
 friendship or intimate.
 We meet many potential partners over the
 course of our life – people that we find
 attractive.

 Wemarry the person we are dating when
 “the time is right”.

 When should we get married according to
 society? What needs to be in place?
 Finished high school, college, university?
 Financially stable?
 Established career?
 Finished travelling or moving around?


 Place:   Are you living in the same geographic
 area?
Are Time and Place still important?
 Youare attracted to qualities, skills or
 resources in others that you do not possess.

 Basis:complementary characteristics.
 (Introverted-Extroverted, Dominant-
 Submissive)

 Notnecessarily motivated by the idea that
 “opposites attract”, but working well
 together.
 Theorists: Kerkhoff and Davis
 As time passes, and exclusiveness increases
  we go through a screening process.
 Potential partners narrowed.
 Age, appearance, status, personality, beliefs.
People Who Meet (potential couple)
                   Are they attractive?
  Couples Attracted to One Another
              Common Social Background?
               Similar Backgrounds!
                     Agreeable Values?
       Similar Attitudes and Values!
                           Compatible?
We are Highly Compatible! (In Love)
                Readiness for Marriage?
                       “The One” :D
Big Bang Theory’s Sheldon. Extreme example of Filter Theory!!
 Theorist:Murstein
 Influenced by Filter Theory and Homogamy


 Stage   1 – Stimulus
    Partnership because of physical attraction, social
     compatibility and personality.
    If the rewards are greater than costs...
 Stage   2 –Values
    Consider sex, religion, marriage, children,
     lifestyles, and attitudes
    Greater compatibility or sameness = Rewarding
 Stage   3 – Role
    What role will these agreed values play in your
     life together?
    How do we both expect to express them?
    Is there stability and optimism in this expression?

 YES! ... Couple may decide to get married.

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Sociology: Theories of Attraction and Mate Selection

  • 1. Theories, Issues and Trends in the 21st Century
  • 2. Monday – Dating History and Socialization  Tuesday – Diversity and Theories of Attraction  Wednesday – Theories Cont’d and Marriage  Thursday – Technology and 21st Century Dating  Friday – In-Class Assignment:“21st Century Guide to Dating”
  • 3.  How has dating evolved?  Social and Historical Changes  The Role of Dating in Socialization  Dating Process and Definitions
  • 4.
  • 5.  What social rules exist in the dating world of the 1950s?  Unwritten rules or social pressures?  How are these rules similar from 60 years ago? How are they different?  Do you think these rules and pressures exist today?
  • 6.  Datingseems natural and normal to us, but many social and historical factors had to occur before dating could go “mainstream”.  1920s– College students and young adults began dating  1940s-50s – Became acceptable for teenagers to date.
  • 7. o 1800s o Rural to Urban transition o Proximity in urban areas o Technological advancement o Increased Transportation o Increase in social life
  • 8. o The invention of the telephone o Easy, frequent communication o Distance isn’t as great a factor o 1930s-40s most households would have a phone! (Possibly a shared line)
  • 9.  WWI and II, Women’s Rights  Withmen away at war, women’s roles, jobs and image of themselves completely changed!  Women’s education, the right to vote, and new found independence.
  • 10.  1960s and 70s  Protest and discussion changed our understanding of intimate relationships.  Power and gender roles – dynamics of dating and the family.
  • 12.  Socialization – process of gaining knowledge, skills and attitudes required to participate actively in a society.  School– 1st social contacts outside the family. Includes, friends, acquaintances, and later on intimate relationships.  Schooland these social contacts act as an introduction to formal procedures of mate selection.
  • 13.  Free-Choice Mate Selection – two people are attracted to each other, fall in love, and get married!  Other influences: Economic reasons, stability/support, companionship, status ...  Canadian Beliefs: Long-lasting relationships based on mutual attraction and love, rather than hard-wired biology.
  • 14. Knowledge about dating and intimacy begins in school but takes time to develop. Kids may have comical, unusual, or even realistic view of dating!
  • 15.  De-emphasizing mate selection. “Hanging out” or “getting together”.  Intimate friendships and sharing.  Common basis of friendships and relationships (respect, Common interests ect)  Dating for social purposes, or because of social pressures
  • 16.  Entertainment, Recreation and Socializing  “Hanging out”, hooking up, getting together  Casual Dating or “Dating Around”  “Going steady”, more commitment, boyfriend or girlfriend status.  Long-term, engagement, or even marriage.
  • 17.  Monogamy – two committed partners get married – a life-long relationship.  Serial Monogamy – marriage to several spouses one after another. Comes as a result of divorce and separation.  Polygamy – one man or woman married to two or more partners. (a punishable offense in Canada, but common in other countries)
  • 18. Who – you and two other group members  What – creating a “How-To Guide” for dating in the 21st Century  Where/When – Friday In-Class (Due Monday 26th)  Why – to demonstrate your knowledge of Theories of Attraction and dating issues  How – Using “scrapbook”/written, video, or power point form.
  • 19. DAT E
  • 20. Why and how do we choose intimate partners?
  • 21. Marc Johns’ “United Dates of America” – National Geographic.
  • 22. “They combed profiles from dating websites all across the US, and pulled the most commonly used terms from each zip code and mapped them. What ends up surfacing are some regional stereotypes ('oil' in Texas, 'retired' in Florida), as well as some amusing terms (Cleopatra? Yodeling? Marshmellow, anyone?).” - Marc Johns
  • 23. • What information can we gather from a study like this? • How is this data important to the study of attraction and dating? •What can we learn from it?
  • 24.  Free-Choice Mate Selection – two people are attracted to each other, fall in love, and get married!  Monogamy – two committed partners get married – a life-long relationship.  SerialMonogamy – marriage to several spouses one after another. Comes as a result of divorce and separation.
  • 25.  Evolutionary psychology (Darwinian)  What we find attractive is prehistorically determined.  The “best” or most advantageous physical traits (fit, strong, fastest, child-bearing) are found to be attractive.  Most attractive = most likely to survive, and therefore reproduce for generations.
  • 26.  Exchange of valuable reproductive resources.  Individualpreferences regarding an attractive mate (what is needed to survive?)  Competition to attain the most attractive (most likely to survive) mate.
  • 27.
  • 28.
  • 29.  Passion – physical attraction, sexual desire  Intimacy – intense friendship which develops slowly through sharing, and a willingness to meet other’s needs.  Commitment – As the rewards of relationship grow, partner is more likely to maintain the relationship.
  • 30.  Individualsare attracted to those with a similar social background.  Attractiveness rating is influenced by similar social positions (age, race, status, religion and political views).  Physicalsameness is also a variable in attraction.
  • 31.  Explainshow attraction between different races/ethnicities occurs because of similar social environment.
  • 32.  We marry/select people that we know.  Highschool sweethearts, work acquaintances, church community, college, university group.  The more often you see someone, the more likely you are to form a relationship – friendship or intimate.
  • 33.  We meet many potential partners over the course of our life – people that we find attractive.  Wemarry the person we are dating when “the time is right”.  When should we get married according to society? What needs to be in place?
  • 34.  Finished high school, college, university?  Financially stable?  Established career?  Finished travelling or moving around?  Place: Are you living in the same geographic area?
  • 35. Are Time and Place still important?
  • 36.  Youare attracted to qualities, skills or resources in others that you do not possess.  Basis:complementary characteristics. (Introverted-Extroverted, Dominant- Submissive)  Notnecessarily motivated by the idea that “opposites attract”, but working well together.
  • 37.
  • 38.  Theorists: Kerkhoff and Davis  As time passes, and exclusiveness increases we go through a screening process.  Potential partners narrowed.  Age, appearance, status, personality, beliefs.
  • 39. People Who Meet (potential couple) Are they attractive? Couples Attracted to One Another Common Social Background? Similar Backgrounds! Agreeable Values? Similar Attitudes and Values! Compatible? We are Highly Compatible! (In Love) Readiness for Marriage? “The One” :D
  • 40. Big Bang Theory’s Sheldon. Extreme example of Filter Theory!!
  • 41.  Theorist:Murstein  Influenced by Filter Theory and Homogamy  Stage 1 – Stimulus  Partnership because of physical attraction, social compatibility and personality.  If the rewards are greater than costs...  Stage 2 –Values  Consider sex, religion, marriage, children, lifestyles, and attitudes  Greater compatibility or sameness = Rewarding
  • 42.  Stage 3 – Role  What role will these agreed values play in your life together?  How do we both expect to express them?  Is there stability and optimism in this expression? YES! ... Couple may decide to get married.