This short article is meant for family members, friends, and colleagues who want to someone with dementia but don't know what they should do. The article provides a simple and helpful introduction on how to approach the overwhelming role of a dementia caregiver. Suitable to understand various aspects of dementia care.
More detailed discussions on how to plan for and cope with dementia home care can be seen at: http://dementiacarenotes.in/caregivers/
1. Caring for someone with dementia
by Swapna Kishore
[This short article was written on request for a souvenir. I am sharing it here because many family caregivers said
they found it a simple and helpful introduction on how to approach the overwhelming role of a dementia caregiver]
Family members, friends, and colleagues often want to support persons with dementia, but are
unsure how to proceed. Below is a brief overview of dementia caregiving.
The first step is to understand the difficulties dementia patients face.
Most people don't appreciate how much dementia affects the patient because they think it is
normal for elders to have reduced brain functionality and memory loss. They think dementia
problems are similar to the way most elders misplace keys or get slower at calculations.
The fact is, because of the cognitive decline in dementia, patients find it difficult to do even
normal, simple activities. Amma skips lunch because she doesn't remember how to heat the meal
her daughter left for her. Grandfather gets cheated of his lifetime savings because he no longer
understands financial transactions. Papa gets lost because he can't remember where he lives.
Grandmother has no idea how to open the bathroom tap. But family members assume such
behaviour is laziness or carelessness because they don't realise these problems are caused by
dementia. When Amma withdraws, they say she is 'giving up' and any frustration or agitation is
considered meanness.
However, once people understand how dementia affects the patient, they can find ways to help
the patients.
Realistic expectations are essential for effective caregiving.
Families often hope treatment will make patients recover completely from dementia, and do not
understand the limitations of medicines. They also think that if patients try harder, they will
become normal.
Such unrealistic expectations create problems.
For example, family members insist that patients should remember things correctly and work
faster. They 'correct' mistakes, criticise, get angry, or show disappointment. This confuses and
distresses patients who are facing genuine problems and already trying their best. They become
slower or may get agitated, which, in turn, upsets family members even more. This unhappy
circle ends only when families accept the dementia reality and adjust their care approach based
on realistic expectations.
Caregivers can look for ways to improve patient safety and fulfilment.
Once caregivers appreciate the realities of dementia, they are able to find suitable caregiving
approaches.