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Vermachtnis Family, Chapter 1 By fraulineTaube (originally posted on the Exchange) How can generation two already be so ugly? What schemes are the troll children planning?
Vermachtnis Legacy Family, Chapter 1 First order of business: The picture quality is abysmal. I apologize. This is my first legacy, first story, first family I haven't gotten totally bored with in 5 *Sim* days, so its a learning experience for me and hopefully not really awful for you! Oh, and by the way, the above picture is meant to look bad, I swear! Suggestions are appreciated. I hope you enjoy!
This is the story of my Legacy family. It all started with Asher Vermachtnis, a neat, nice, and serious Knowledge Sim with a dream of leaving behind a legacy . . .
Asher started out living the simple life, having purchased much too big a plot of land for his meager savings. Still, he was content as long as he could work on his skills. He got a job in the Science career track, and quickly moved up the ladder. It seemed like everything was going swimmingly for him, but he felt there was an empty part of his life.
Then he met Christy Stratton and things fell in place. They got along great. Asher quickly expressed his interest, and asked Christy to move in, get married, and birth his progeny. You will notice he apparently did this by talking about video games, because, as we all know, video game nerds get all the girls. Asher has never owned a video game (or, for that matter, a TV) in his life, but, like most Knowledge Sims, he can bluff his way into nerdiness.
Christy was apparently okay with all that however and moved into (onto?) Asher's . . . erm, lawn house. She is fairly nice and neat, quite active and a family Sim. She is also a Senator and brought a hefty sum of money with her, so she's welcome in my book. Her features aren't too bad except she has an enormous mouth. And yes, I'm being lazy and starting with a Townie!!
Asher soon proposed, once they had built themselves a little house with some of the money Christy brought with her. Strangely, despite being a Family Sim, Christy didn't desire to get engaged, nor has she yet desired to get married, so Asher is deciding to let things take their course on that decision.
Asher and Christy celebrated their engagement immediately. Little did they realize, this marked the end of their carefree life.
Yes, Christy soon discovered that she was pregnant with the heir to the Vermachtnis family name.  "Hey, Asher, I'm going into labor. Do you think you could wake up for this?!!"
"Oh, that's okay, Christy. I'll just make the bed while you deliver our child. After all, we're not even married . . ." Sigh. Baby Daisy was born without much fuss. She has blue eyes like her mom and lighter skin and red hair like her dad.
Once he got done tidying up, Asher finally recognized his new offspring.
Pretty soon it was little Daisy's birthday. I was waiting with bated breath to see what she would look like. She turned out . . . interesting. We'll get to that later.
Asher met Dustin Broke and decided to interview him as a possible future boyfriend for Daisy. "So, Dustin, how do you feel about being friends with my daughter? Y'know, when she's a teen."
"Sir, are you asking me to eventually join your family? I would be honored!"
"Oh, no, nothing like that. She'll just need to have her first kiss with some teen, and you're the first male one I've met. I'm sure you understand, son." Alas, it was not to be . . .
When Christy finally decided she might as well get married, Asher followed through. It was too late, however, as I realized that Daisy took her mother's last name, after I had very carefully picked what I thought was a clever last name. Sigh again.
Here is something I am curious about: This is Exhibit A, Asher's profile. Pretty normal, right?
And here is Exhibit B, Christy's profile. She's got a bit of a hooked nose but nothing too bad. Not like the monstrosity she's holding.
So, where in the world did this nose come from? The shadow from it makes her look like she has a little mustache, which is most unbecoming. She also inherited her mother's gargantuan mouth.
Ah, vanity, thy name is Christy.
While relaxing, Christy and Asher discuss the disheartening reality that not only will the heir not carry on the family name, but that she is apparently some kind of little troll. With a heavy heart, they decide to try again for an heir. Little Daisy sleeps innocently in the corner, not even aware that she is being divested of her inheritence as she dreams.
The troll, I mean, Daisy's birthday. Now that they have a small pool, Asher does pretty much everything in his swim trunks. Oh, and that blue and reddish thing behind the refrigerator? That's Christy, celebrating this momentous occasion in her own special way, and, you may have noticed, again wearing maternity clothes.
Asher looks like a total dork in his Scholar clothes, especially when he makes faces like this.
Hey, that guy looks vaguely familiar . . . and so does that big belly! Christy has had a horrible pregnancy. Her morning sickness was so bad the first day, she didn't do anything except tend to her most basic needs. She's been pretty much exhausted. This ought to have been a sign, but I did not pick up on it.
The family that skill builds together, stays together.
Is this really good for the baby? With Christy so wiped out, it was necessary. The challenge was getting her all the way outside between sprints to the toilet and energy desperation.
They had twins!! And, yes, Asher is again ignoring his wife while she gives birth. He couldn't even be bothered to hold the first baby while Christy had the second. Oh, Asher, when will you learn? Are omelets that much more important than your own spawn?
Baby #1 is a girl named Darcy, and #2 is a boy named Devon. Devon has darker skin like his mom, while Darcy has her dad's skin tone, and they both have red hair and blue eyes. Christy must secretly be a redhead, I think. This is the first pair of twins I have ever had in the game. Its kind of neat, but, good Lord, how am I going to take care of two babies and Daisy? Oh, nanny . . .?
The nanny did her part in caring for the babies. Thanks, Karen, that's a big help.
But she did buy Christy enough time to finish her portrait of Asher.
Ahhhhhhh! Two stinky babies. Twins are a lot of work when they're babies. Devon and Darcy always timed it so that they both needed something at the exact same time, and Christy and Asher would get overwhelmed deciding who to help first. I had never seen this before (and was not quick enough to capture it on film) but Christy once did a little animation of seeming to weigh her options, looking first at one hand and then the other as she moved them up and down. This is the universal sign for "For the love of all things holy, what do I do now?"
The twins eventually made it to their birthday. Asher is once again blowing off important moments in the life of his family. Oh, and that's Daisy as a child . . . well, the back of her head, anyway. Once I decided she wasn't the heir I didn't take pictures of her much until the twins were children and were interacting with her.
More monstrous toddlers!! Why, Christy, why do you give my potential heirs such horrendous genes? After I took you in and saved you from your fashion crisis, this is how you repay me?
The parents love them anyway. Sigh. They may be ugly, but they have delightful personalities - neat, nice, slightly lazy, and outgoing. Darcy is serious and Devon is playful.
"Hey mom, isn't it great that we're best friends?" "NO." I have no idea which toddler this is, because they both have red hair and pink pajamas, and at this poor picture resolution they are pretty much identical. I think it may be Devon, though, because no one seems to get along with him very well.
Why, hello, Jan Tellerman and Mailman Pao Mellon. You're just in time for the future mates, er, I mean . . . *birthday* party. Please, get to know the children . . . y'know, just because, not for any ulterior motives or anything . . . heh. As you can probably tell by the choice of a female Townie and a male NPC, I am planning on Darcy being the heir.
It took a while for the three spectators to figure out the difficult art of standing around and celebrating a birthday. First, Jan apparently hogged the entire kitchen by standing in one spot, sending Pao and Christy into a hissy fit.
Then Pao said, "See ya later, I'm going swimming. Call me when something exciting happens . . ."
Then Christy seemed to also think it was taking too long, and put her own (full) physical needs over the emotional needs of her daughter.
But Darcy grew up just fine, and apparently is high-fiving her father, which would be a totally cool birthday cinematic.
Devon also had some trouble getting everyone's attention for his birthday. What is it with Asher and running off to do silly things during special occasions in his family life?
Despite that, Devon also managed to grow up well. See how everyone is standing as far away from him as they can and still be in the kitchen? I told you no one likes him! Poor Devon.
Yay! We can finally move all the baby stuff up into the attic! There's still a few uses left on the Smart Milk, but the parents (and me!) were so freakin' tired of taking care of two toddlers, we decided it was time for them to grow up. That Smart Milk will just have to wait for Gen 3.
Um yeah . . . apparently everyone was just standing around waiting for me to come run their lives. I get this little . . . erm, thing (I don't know if you could call it a glitch) sometimes when I start up, but it pretty much fills everyone's needs for some reason, so its okay by me.
These then are the children: Daisy, an Aries and secret commander of the Underground Snub-nosed Trolls for World Domination Federation (USTWDF). Eldest child, but due to the licentiously premarital indiscretions of her parents, not a carrier of the Vermachtnis family name and therefore, not the heir. Very nice little girl, but completely serious and hates to play or tell jokes or anything fun. Odd.
Second child and first twin, Darcy Vermachtnis, is also an Aries and nearly a clone of her older sister. Due to this special bond and their extremely *normal* shared childhood habit of talking about the weather while making bird noises all the frickin' time, Daisy made Darcy lieutenant of the USTWDF. Darcy is destined to marry Pao Mellon (who will be our first NPC - weeee) as she is also destined to be the heir, being the better looking of the two twins and my favorite personality. Pao seems to meet the approval of her family, as everyone either wants to be friends or best friends with him. People, you have anywhere between 10-15 family friends on a given day!! What is so special about the mail carrier?
3rd child, 2nd twin and black sheep, Devon. Devon broke the snub-nosed troll chain, but he has nose issues of his own. He is a Capricorn, very playful and acts more like a child. Perhaps because of this, or just the fact that he's. . . well, a little off, no one much likes him. Oh, and since Daisy will be growing up in about nine pictures, and going to college as soon as I can figure out how to get Uni installed, I bought a double bed for the 2nd kids room, intending it for Darcy eventually. However, because Devon is unable to make friends within his own family and therefore refuses to share a bed with anyone, he has to sleep in Daisy's bed while she sleeps with her best friend and lieutenant, Darcy. And because this is a pain in the butt, I am not changing the wallpaper or bedspread for him. He will just have to deal.
Asher maxed his logic!! I wasn't paying attention, though, so you can just assume this picture of him playing chess is irrefutable physical evidence. Christy has maxed a couple skills, too, but she doesn't really seem to care so neither do I. Since she was already too high in her career for me to get the Politics reward when she moved in, and is now at the top of her career, I could care less what she does most of the day.
Family bonding over the dart board! Yay! Since all three kids wear those stupid yellow pajamas all the time and they are hard to tell apart, I bought them each their own pajamas. However, for some reason, I am unable to plan outfits for any of them. Sigh. Observe the look Asher is giving his only son - why does everyone hate him so much? The kid tries so hard, and what does he get? Well, ignored mostly, but also lots of red minuses, weird looks, and I must confess, a pink room with a dollhouse from me. I'm sure this won't set him up for any deep-seated resentments, however. Right?
Dev: "So that's when Dad said, 'I thought I smelled a rat . . . when did you come in, Devon?' Ha ha, that Dad, what a kidder."
Darcy: "I don't think you're a rat, Dev." Dev: "Gee, thanks, sis . . ." Darcy: "Actually more like a bug, as in, you are bugging the heck out of me. Am I right, Commander?" *snicker*
Daisy: "To be fair, he's more like a fish out of water, what with his bizarre and unnatural playfulness and non-snubbed-nose." Darcy: "Tee hee, fish boy, tee hee, what a weirdo."
Dev: "Ya, I like animals too. I think that's why Mom bought me a one-way ticket to the Wildnerness Preserve." Daisy: "I can't take it anymore. You have left me no choice but to sink through the floor in a desperate attempt to get away from your oblivious weirdness." Dev: "Heh, well, at least you're still listening, right, Darcy?" Darcy: "What? I'm sorry, I was staring intensely at your beak-like nose and wondering, from an evolutionary standpoint, whether it might be better for cracking open snail shells or hooking fish right out of the water." Poor Dev!
Then Daisy made Dev stand in the corner while she played darts. I think maybe Dev's soul did something horrible in another life, because he is getting such a backlash of karma from this family. Or maybe its just nose-discrimination. Hmm.
Darcy: "Tee hee, fish boy . . ." Lay off, Darcy, we're going to give the poor boy a complex.
Finally, time to get a teenager in the house. Oh, and, has anyone noticed that finely muscled slab of man standing in the background? Full fitness, baby - this guy loves to swim!
Daisy: "Hmm, I wonder why my family has such a problem celebrating events. You'd think they'd be capable of standing in more than just that one spot here in the kitchen."
"Maybe its because they're not of my superior snub-nosed troll race. Yeah, that's gotta be it. Now for my wish. How about . . . minions! Yeah, lots of minions . . ."
Daisy: "Um, hey mom, I'm growing up here. Since you're the only one who didn't immediately run out of the kitchen to do inane non-need-related stuff, do you think maybe you could pay attention?" Christy: "But, honey, that's just not how we do birthdays in the Vermachtnis house. You wouldn't want to break family tradition now . . ."
Daisy: "Wheee, I'm glowing!" fraulineTaube: "Wheee, I have nothing to say for this picture!"
Its kind of an improvement, but it looks like her eyeballs are trying to force their way out of her head. Hmm, she needs something . . .
"Daisy, MAKEUP STAT!" Yes, that's it, Asher, thanks.
That's better. She's actually kind of cute. I am partial to this haircut because it is awfully close to my own RL haircut. She rolled popularity, which worked for me, because what with her not being the heir and me just getting Uni, I had already decided her life mission was to get the cosmetic surgery reward object. Uh, for purely non-superficial reasons, of course.
Christy took a trip to the community lot to ostensibly buy some groceries and clothes, but I think she really wanted to just talk smack with Townies. She is either really bad, or fiendishly good, at gossiping, depending on your opinion of gossiping. Christy: "Oh, did you hear about my very good friend Dina, with whom I have an excellent, caring, trusting friendship?" Sophie: "Nooo . . . what?"
Christy: "Her husband died! Oh man, that cracks me up everytime." Christy, that is not very nice.
She's doing it again!! "He died, I tell you. Gone, kicked the bucket, croaked, ah ha ha ha." CHRISTY!!!!!!!
Now that Daisy is a teen, she can finally use reward objects, which means I can finally stop caring about what *she* needs, and focus on skilling.
Daisy is a very good kid, though. She loves to skill build, always does her homework (and most of the members of the house go plat everytime she brings home another A+), and she even taught Dev to do his homework when the parents were too tired. She may be the commander of a devilish troll army, but she is very nice to have around the house!
So I reward this popularity Sim with a new friend. These two get along *so* well, and, as you'll see on the next page, have made me think that Daisy does not just want to be popular for the sake of having friends. Luckily, Ricky is an easygoing guy and doesn't mind hanging out while Daisy's dad cooks up viruses.
Daisy invites Ricky to a community lot and they get right down to business. Not the business of developing a crush, although they did that too. No, more *important* business . . . MUA HA HA HA! Ricky: "I think your idea to develop an army of clone minions is fabulous, Daisy. But why not make them ROBOT clones?!!"
"Or maybe even genetically engineered cyborg-alien clones? They would have a very similar nose structure to yours, which is most attractive, I might add."
"Truly, the world is your stage, and all shall bow before your whims, O Commander."
Daisy: "Ricky, you're going to make an excellent robot henchman. You just have evil minion written all over you."
Ricky: "Aww, shucks, what are friends for if not to be subjugated by a deformed megalomaniac?" Daisy: *swoon*
For the first time in, uh, a while, everyone was asleep at the same time. Let's see what visions are dancing through their heads . . . Poor, misunderstood Dev dreams of his sister, and her excellent taste in decorating, which he is beginning to enjoy more every day . . .
The girls dream of people to either convert or subject to the will of their nefarious organization . . .
And Asher and Christy sleep the blissful sleep of people who are no longer terribly important, and therefore get to goof off a lot more than their progeny.
Side note: Going to work as a mayor is so cool!
Christy's buff now, too. That swimming pool works wonders.
And Asher maxed his Cleaning skill apparently by appraising his wife's butt. Sigh.
In other news, Daisy had her first kiss with Ricky and went steady with him, revealing . . . DUN DUN DUN . . . Ricky is a romance Sim. So maybe he is only good as a henchman. Don't expect me to bring you to college to hook up with Daisy, Ricky! You've blown your chances! Oh, and by the way, thanks for giving her that kiss . . .
With Christy and Asher both bringing in top dollar, we did a little yard work. Next up is a functional upstairs expansion.
Christy burned pork chops and nearly caused a disaster because, while panicking, she would not move out of the doorway to let the firefighter through until I directed her. I tried to get her to meet the firefighter afterwards, but she thought it was more important to play darts. Christy, you're beginning to be a pain except for the days you go to work and bring home money!
Asher made it to Mad Scientist and tries to look eccentric and dastardly, despite the fact that he is smiling and thinking about great grades. Sorry Asher, you just don't have the evil brillance of your troll daughters.
Daisy wanted to have a party, so I gave her a fancy look for the occasion. Its awfully cute. Maybe she'll change back to red hair someday.
Here's a good way to drive up party score.
Ooh . . . here's another. This is Daisy's favorite, I think. Aren't they so cute with their matching red shirts?
Daisy had such a rockin' party she slept well into the morning, and almost missed her bus. She literally ran, getting there right at 9. Ahhhhhhhhh.
Oh yeah, and the headmaster came. Korey decided to snub the call for dinner in favor of playing chess by his onesies. Bah. So it took a while and a little fancy footwork, or should I say "shoo and distract" work, to get him to dinner, leaving little time for other pursuits. Luckily, Asher made his delicious salmon. Score: 49 food, 30 tour, 20 schmooze, with 40 min left. Both parents want Daisy to be an overachiever, so I figured I ought to probably get the kiddles in private school now.
Asher wants to max all his skills (he has mech, cleaning, and logic maxed and cooking at 9) so this is where he can usually be found these days.
But he also does a few shots of the ol' elixer here and there, as he is getting quite old and I'm not ready for him to be elderly yet.
Daisy discovers that you can make friends really fast by being a little flirt. Sigh. Oh well, Ricky's a romance Sim, so he probably would have done it to her too. She'll be going to Uni soon, then all these teenage flings won't matter.
Asher has been a pain in the plumbob lately. First, Christy had a great chance card that netted us 30 thousand simoleons, but then Asher's chance card lost 20 thousand of those. Then he decides he wants to be saved from death, which he has not wanted for a long, long time. So, I thought this would do it, but his mech skill is maxed, so apparently he is impervious to electrocution, or maybe in SimCity dishwashers don't use electricity, but instead use the power of "happy thoughts and unicorns." Oh, and please disregard the naked person taking a shower. I am a horrible, horrible photographer.
So this is what it finally took to kill Asher. Luckily Christy was there, but it was a chore keeping her from catching on fire also.
Christy begs for Asher's pitiful life. Man, Asher, you so owe us. We have to burn down the whole kitchen, make Christy distraught, and scare me that the whole place, and possibly Christy also, was going to go up in flames - just to get you here. If you want to die, next time you better be more flammable.
Yeah, yeah, he's back. Alright, Asher, start sweeping - that's your mess!!
After his burning, he used the Energizer, but then kept walking around with a cloud pouring off of him. Could it be . . . the unholy vapors of the afterlife still clinging to his mortal body? Hmmmmm.
Hee hee, Christy looks like she's about to whack Asher with a cane or a crowbar or something. Way to go, Christy!!
Remodeled the kitchen (what was left of it) but between Asher losing that 20 thou and replacing almost the entire kitchen, I was not in the mood to build an upstairs yet. The new kitchen is very swank, though.
Aww, Daisy looks so cute in her uniform. On her way to fulfilling her parents' wish for her to be an Overachiever, Daisy finds a job in the Medical field, level 2 of course. Since everyone stopped desiring that before I could get her there, however, I think she only worked one day.
I finally figured out how to get Uni installed!! Turns out I had a defective disk (which would explain EVERYTHING) so I took it back and got a new one that - wonder of wonders - works. Anyway, I sent Mr. Ricky Romance off to the penal colony, um, I mean, college, to get him and Daisy to break it off without losing their friendship. Daisy then worked her magic on Orlando Centowski, who declined to go steady with her but is not about to turn down a little sweet talk. He'll also get to go college someday, but only because Daisy desires it, and so far they haven't even talked once.
Back to the present, let's check out how the rest of the family is doing. We'll eavesdrop on Darcy and Pao's conversation . . . " . . . well, yes, Pao, the police would arrest you for that. However, in a few days, when I turn into a teen and then get shipped off to college, it would be perfectly legal for us to . . ." WHOA DARCY!! Next picture . . .
Christy is busy painting the creatures that will henceforth inhabit my nightmares. However, this was the first masterpiece that she sold. I was only too happy to get it out of the house!
And Asher is *sigh* working his way up the medical career due to his midlife crisis - I mean, suddenly discovered lifetime want - to become Chief of Staff. Apparently he also felt that he just wasn't "up" to being a mad scientist.
Christy has decided to be the difficult one once again and wants to marry 6 children off, despite the fact that she has three almost-grown children and is five days away from being an elder. Child #4 is on the way. This is so going to be a pain.
Daisy wants to be Captain Hero. Thank you, Daisy, for being managaeble. You always were "the good one." I'm sure this is just a cover, since she is an evil overlord and all. Anyway, I send her to college to try my hand at Sim State before the heiress goes.
Christy is upset - naturally, since she is a family sim. The really heartbreaking thing about this picture, though, is Asher's look as the cab leaves. He looks so . . . pensive. Maybe there is some substance beneath the veneer of Asher's clueless beefcake facade.
And that's the end of the first chapter. Next one will be better, but now I leave you with a few questions to ponder in the meantime: *How will Daisy reconcile her evil streak with her desire to be a do-gooder, not to mention her ability to look this cute as a YA? *For the love of all things holy, how is Christy going to raise three more kids to adulthood and get all 6 of them married off in time? *Can she do it before I go totally crazy? *Will anyone ever care about Devon? He hasn't even been in the last several pictures! See you next time!

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Vermachtnis 1

  • 1. Vermachtnis Family, Chapter 1 By fraulineTaube (originally posted on the Exchange) How can generation two already be so ugly? What schemes are the troll children planning?
  • 2. Vermachtnis Legacy Family, Chapter 1 First order of business: The picture quality is abysmal. I apologize. This is my first legacy, first story, first family I haven't gotten totally bored with in 5 *Sim* days, so its a learning experience for me and hopefully not really awful for you! Oh, and by the way, the above picture is meant to look bad, I swear! Suggestions are appreciated. I hope you enjoy!
  • 3. This is the story of my Legacy family. It all started with Asher Vermachtnis, a neat, nice, and serious Knowledge Sim with a dream of leaving behind a legacy . . .
  • 4. Asher started out living the simple life, having purchased much too big a plot of land for his meager savings. Still, he was content as long as he could work on his skills. He got a job in the Science career track, and quickly moved up the ladder. It seemed like everything was going swimmingly for him, but he felt there was an empty part of his life.
  • 5. Then he met Christy Stratton and things fell in place. They got along great. Asher quickly expressed his interest, and asked Christy to move in, get married, and birth his progeny. You will notice he apparently did this by talking about video games, because, as we all know, video game nerds get all the girls. Asher has never owned a video game (or, for that matter, a TV) in his life, but, like most Knowledge Sims, he can bluff his way into nerdiness.
  • 6. Christy was apparently okay with all that however and moved into (onto?) Asher's . . . erm, lawn house. She is fairly nice and neat, quite active and a family Sim. She is also a Senator and brought a hefty sum of money with her, so she's welcome in my book. Her features aren't too bad except she has an enormous mouth. And yes, I'm being lazy and starting with a Townie!!
  • 7. Asher soon proposed, once they had built themselves a little house with some of the money Christy brought with her. Strangely, despite being a Family Sim, Christy didn't desire to get engaged, nor has she yet desired to get married, so Asher is deciding to let things take their course on that decision.
  • 8. Asher and Christy celebrated their engagement immediately. Little did they realize, this marked the end of their carefree life.
  • 9. Yes, Christy soon discovered that she was pregnant with the heir to the Vermachtnis family name. "Hey, Asher, I'm going into labor. Do you think you could wake up for this?!!"
  • 10. "Oh, that's okay, Christy. I'll just make the bed while you deliver our child. After all, we're not even married . . ." Sigh. Baby Daisy was born without much fuss. She has blue eyes like her mom and lighter skin and red hair like her dad.
  • 11. Once he got done tidying up, Asher finally recognized his new offspring.
  • 12. Pretty soon it was little Daisy's birthday. I was waiting with bated breath to see what she would look like. She turned out . . . interesting. We'll get to that later.
  • 13. Asher met Dustin Broke and decided to interview him as a possible future boyfriend for Daisy. "So, Dustin, how do you feel about being friends with my daughter? Y'know, when she's a teen."
  • 14. "Sir, are you asking me to eventually join your family? I would be honored!"
  • 15. "Oh, no, nothing like that. She'll just need to have her first kiss with some teen, and you're the first male one I've met. I'm sure you understand, son." Alas, it was not to be . . .
  • 16. When Christy finally decided she might as well get married, Asher followed through. It was too late, however, as I realized that Daisy took her mother's last name, after I had very carefully picked what I thought was a clever last name. Sigh again.
  • 17. Here is something I am curious about: This is Exhibit A, Asher's profile. Pretty normal, right?
  • 18. And here is Exhibit B, Christy's profile. She's got a bit of a hooked nose but nothing too bad. Not like the monstrosity she's holding.
  • 19. So, where in the world did this nose come from? The shadow from it makes her look like she has a little mustache, which is most unbecoming. She also inherited her mother's gargantuan mouth.
  • 20. Ah, vanity, thy name is Christy.
  • 21. While relaxing, Christy and Asher discuss the disheartening reality that not only will the heir not carry on the family name, but that she is apparently some kind of little troll. With a heavy heart, they decide to try again for an heir. Little Daisy sleeps innocently in the corner, not even aware that she is being divested of her inheritence as she dreams.
  • 22. The troll, I mean, Daisy's birthday. Now that they have a small pool, Asher does pretty much everything in his swim trunks. Oh, and that blue and reddish thing behind the refrigerator? That's Christy, celebrating this momentous occasion in her own special way, and, you may have noticed, again wearing maternity clothes.
  • 23. Asher looks like a total dork in his Scholar clothes, especially when he makes faces like this.
  • 24. Hey, that guy looks vaguely familiar . . . and so does that big belly! Christy has had a horrible pregnancy. Her morning sickness was so bad the first day, she didn't do anything except tend to her most basic needs. She's been pretty much exhausted. This ought to have been a sign, but I did not pick up on it.
  • 25. The family that skill builds together, stays together.
  • 26. Is this really good for the baby? With Christy so wiped out, it was necessary. The challenge was getting her all the way outside between sprints to the toilet and energy desperation.
  • 27. They had twins!! And, yes, Asher is again ignoring his wife while she gives birth. He couldn't even be bothered to hold the first baby while Christy had the second. Oh, Asher, when will you learn? Are omelets that much more important than your own spawn?
  • 28. Baby #1 is a girl named Darcy, and #2 is a boy named Devon. Devon has darker skin like his mom, while Darcy has her dad's skin tone, and they both have red hair and blue eyes. Christy must secretly be a redhead, I think. This is the first pair of twins I have ever had in the game. Its kind of neat, but, good Lord, how am I going to take care of two babies and Daisy? Oh, nanny . . .?
  • 29. The nanny did her part in caring for the babies. Thanks, Karen, that's a big help.
  • 30. But she did buy Christy enough time to finish her portrait of Asher.
  • 31. Ahhhhhhh! Two stinky babies. Twins are a lot of work when they're babies. Devon and Darcy always timed it so that they both needed something at the exact same time, and Christy and Asher would get overwhelmed deciding who to help first. I had never seen this before (and was not quick enough to capture it on film) but Christy once did a little animation of seeming to weigh her options, looking first at one hand and then the other as she moved them up and down. This is the universal sign for "For the love of all things holy, what do I do now?"
  • 32. The twins eventually made it to their birthday. Asher is once again blowing off important moments in the life of his family. Oh, and that's Daisy as a child . . . well, the back of her head, anyway. Once I decided she wasn't the heir I didn't take pictures of her much until the twins were children and were interacting with her.
  • 33. More monstrous toddlers!! Why, Christy, why do you give my potential heirs such horrendous genes? After I took you in and saved you from your fashion crisis, this is how you repay me?
  • 34. The parents love them anyway. Sigh. They may be ugly, but they have delightful personalities - neat, nice, slightly lazy, and outgoing. Darcy is serious and Devon is playful.
  • 35. "Hey mom, isn't it great that we're best friends?" "NO." I have no idea which toddler this is, because they both have red hair and pink pajamas, and at this poor picture resolution they are pretty much identical. I think it may be Devon, though, because no one seems to get along with him very well.
  • 36. Why, hello, Jan Tellerman and Mailman Pao Mellon. You're just in time for the future mates, er, I mean . . . *birthday* party. Please, get to know the children . . . y'know, just because, not for any ulterior motives or anything . . . heh. As you can probably tell by the choice of a female Townie and a male NPC, I am planning on Darcy being the heir.
  • 37. It took a while for the three spectators to figure out the difficult art of standing around and celebrating a birthday. First, Jan apparently hogged the entire kitchen by standing in one spot, sending Pao and Christy into a hissy fit.
  • 38. Then Pao said, "See ya later, I'm going swimming. Call me when something exciting happens . . ."
  • 39. Then Christy seemed to also think it was taking too long, and put her own (full) physical needs over the emotional needs of her daughter.
  • 40. But Darcy grew up just fine, and apparently is high-fiving her father, which would be a totally cool birthday cinematic.
  • 41. Devon also had some trouble getting everyone's attention for his birthday. What is it with Asher and running off to do silly things during special occasions in his family life?
  • 42. Despite that, Devon also managed to grow up well. See how everyone is standing as far away from him as they can and still be in the kitchen? I told you no one likes him! Poor Devon.
  • 43. Yay! We can finally move all the baby stuff up into the attic! There's still a few uses left on the Smart Milk, but the parents (and me!) were so freakin' tired of taking care of two toddlers, we decided it was time for them to grow up. That Smart Milk will just have to wait for Gen 3.
  • 44. Um yeah . . . apparently everyone was just standing around waiting for me to come run their lives. I get this little . . . erm, thing (I don't know if you could call it a glitch) sometimes when I start up, but it pretty much fills everyone's needs for some reason, so its okay by me.
  • 45. These then are the children: Daisy, an Aries and secret commander of the Underground Snub-nosed Trolls for World Domination Federation (USTWDF). Eldest child, but due to the licentiously premarital indiscretions of her parents, not a carrier of the Vermachtnis family name and therefore, not the heir. Very nice little girl, but completely serious and hates to play or tell jokes or anything fun. Odd.
  • 46. Second child and first twin, Darcy Vermachtnis, is also an Aries and nearly a clone of her older sister. Due to this special bond and their extremely *normal* shared childhood habit of talking about the weather while making bird noises all the frickin' time, Daisy made Darcy lieutenant of the USTWDF. Darcy is destined to marry Pao Mellon (who will be our first NPC - weeee) as she is also destined to be the heir, being the better looking of the two twins and my favorite personality. Pao seems to meet the approval of her family, as everyone either wants to be friends or best friends with him. People, you have anywhere between 10-15 family friends on a given day!! What is so special about the mail carrier?
  • 47. 3rd child, 2nd twin and black sheep, Devon. Devon broke the snub-nosed troll chain, but he has nose issues of his own. He is a Capricorn, very playful and acts more like a child. Perhaps because of this, or just the fact that he's. . . well, a little off, no one much likes him. Oh, and since Daisy will be growing up in about nine pictures, and going to college as soon as I can figure out how to get Uni installed, I bought a double bed for the 2nd kids room, intending it for Darcy eventually. However, because Devon is unable to make friends within his own family and therefore refuses to share a bed with anyone, he has to sleep in Daisy's bed while she sleeps with her best friend and lieutenant, Darcy. And because this is a pain in the butt, I am not changing the wallpaper or bedspread for him. He will just have to deal.
  • 48. Asher maxed his logic!! I wasn't paying attention, though, so you can just assume this picture of him playing chess is irrefutable physical evidence. Christy has maxed a couple skills, too, but she doesn't really seem to care so neither do I. Since she was already too high in her career for me to get the Politics reward when she moved in, and is now at the top of her career, I could care less what she does most of the day.
  • 49. Family bonding over the dart board! Yay! Since all three kids wear those stupid yellow pajamas all the time and they are hard to tell apart, I bought them each their own pajamas. However, for some reason, I am unable to plan outfits for any of them. Sigh. Observe the look Asher is giving his only son - why does everyone hate him so much? The kid tries so hard, and what does he get? Well, ignored mostly, but also lots of red minuses, weird looks, and I must confess, a pink room with a dollhouse from me. I'm sure this won't set him up for any deep-seated resentments, however. Right?
  • 50. Dev: "So that's when Dad said, 'I thought I smelled a rat . . . when did you come in, Devon?' Ha ha, that Dad, what a kidder."
  • 51. Darcy: "I don't think you're a rat, Dev." Dev: "Gee, thanks, sis . . ." Darcy: "Actually more like a bug, as in, you are bugging the heck out of me. Am I right, Commander?" *snicker*
  • 52. Daisy: "To be fair, he's more like a fish out of water, what with his bizarre and unnatural playfulness and non-snubbed-nose." Darcy: "Tee hee, fish boy, tee hee, what a weirdo."
  • 53. Dev: "Ya, I like animals too. I think that's why Mom bought me a one-way ticket to the Wildnerness Preserve." Daisy: "I can't take it anymore. You have left me no choice but to sink through the floor in a desperate attempt to get away from your oblivious weirdness." Dev: "Heh, well, at least you're still listening, right, Darcy?" Darcy: "What? I'm sorry, I was staring intensely at your beak-like nose and wondering, from an evolutionary standpoint, whether it might be better for cracking open snail shells or hooking fish right out of the water." Poor Dev!
  • 54. Then Daisy made Dev stand in the corner while she played darts. I think maybe Dev's soul did something horrible in another life, because he is getting such a backlash of karma from this family. Or maybe its just nose-discrimination. Hmm.
  • 55. Darcy: "Tee hee, fish boy . . ." Lay off, Darcy, we're going to give the poor boy a complex.
  • 56. Finally, time to get a teenager in the house. Oh, and, has anyone noticed that finely muscled slab of man standing in the background? Full fitness, baby - this guy loves to swim!
  • 57. Daisy: "Hmm, I wonder why my family has such a problem celebrating events. You'd think they'd be capable of standing in more than just that one spot here in the kitchen."
  • 58. "Maybe its because they're not of my superior snub-nosed troll race. Yeah, that's gotta be it. Now for my wish. How about . . . minions! Yeah, lots of minions . . ."
  • 59. Daisy: "Um, hey mom, I'm growing up here. Since you're the only one who didn't immediately run out of the kitchen to do inane non-need-related stuff, do you think maybe you could pay attention?" Christy: "But, honey, that's just not how we do birthdays in the Vermachtnis house. You wouldn't want to break family tradition now . . ."
  • 60. Daisy: "Wheee, I'm glowing!" fraulineTaube: "Wheee, I have nothing to say for this picture!"
  • 61. Its kind of an improvement, but it looks like her eyeballs are trying to force their way out of her head. Hmm, she needs something . . .
  • 62. "Daisy, MAKEUP STAT!" Yes, that's it, Asher, thanks.
  • 63. That's better. She's actually kind of cute. I am partial to this haircut because it is awfully close to my own RL haircut. She rolled popularity, which worked for me, because what with her not being the heir and me just getting Uni, I had already decided her life mission was to get the cosmetic surgery reward object. Uh, for purely non-superficial reasons, of course.
  • 64. Christy took a trip to the community lot to ostensibly buy some groceries and clothes, but I think she really wanted to just talk smack with Townies. She is either really bad, or fiendishly good, at gossiping, depending on your opinion of gossiping. Christy: "Oh, did you hear about my very good friend Dina, with whom I have an excellent, caring, trusting friendship?" Sophie: "Nooo . . . what?"
  • 65. Christy: "Her husband died! Oh man, that cracks me up everytime." Christy, that is not very nice.
  • 66. She's doing it again!! "He died, I tell you. Gone, kicked the bucket, croaked, ah ha ha ha." CHRISTY!!!!!!!
  • 67. Now that Daisy is a teen, she can finally use reward objects, which means I can finally stop caring about what *she* needs, and focus on skilling.
  • 68. Daisy is a very good kid, though. She loves to skill build, always does her homework (and most of the members of the house go plat everytime she brings home another A+), and she even taught Dev to do his homework when the parents were too tired. She may be the commander of a devilish troll army, but she is very nice to have around the house!
  • 69. So I reward this popularity Sim with a new friend. These two get along *so* well, and, as you'll see on the next page, have made me think that Daisy does not just want to be popular for the sake of having friends. Luckily, Ricky is an easygoing guy and doesn't mind hanging out while Daisy's dad cooks up viruses.
  • 70. Daisy invites Ricky to a community lot and they get right down to business. Not the business of developing a crush, although they did that too. No, more *important* business . . . MUA HA HA HA! Ricky: "I think your idea to develop an army of clone minions is fabulous, Daisy. But why not make them ROBOT clones?!!"
  • 71. "Or maybe even genetically engineered cyborg-alien clones? They would have a very similar nose structure to yours, which is most attractive, I might add."
  • 72. "Truly, the world is your stage, and all shall bow before your whims, O Commander."
  • 73. Daisy: "Ricky, you're going to make an excellent robot henchman. You just have evil minion written all over you."
  • 74. Ricky: "Aww, shucks, what are friends for if not to be subjugated by a deformed megalomaniac?" Daisy: *swoon*
  • 75. For the first time in, uh, a while, everyone was asleep at the same time. Let's see what visions are dancing through their heads . . . Poor, misunderstood Dev dreams of his sister, and her excellent taste in decorating, which he is beginning to enjoy more every day . . .
  • 76. The girls dream of people to either convert or subject to the will of their nefarious organization . . .
  • 77. And Asher and Christy sleep the blissful sleep of people who are no longer terribly important, and therefore get to goof off a lot more than their progeny.
  • 78. Side note: Going to work as a mayor is so cool!
  • 79. Christy's buff now, too. That swimming pool works wonders.
  • 80. And Asher maxed his Cleaning skill apparently by appraising his wife's butt. Sigh.
  • 81. In other news, Daisy had her first kiss with Ricky and went steady with him, revealing . . . DUN DUN DUN . . . Ricky is a romance Sim. So maybe he is only good as a henchman. Don't expect me to bring you to college to hook up with Daisy, Ricky! You've blown your chances! Oh, and by the way, thanks for giving her that kiss . . .
  • 82. With Christy and Asher both bringing in top dollar, we did a little yard work. Next up is a functional upstairs expansion.
  • 83. Christy burned pork chops and nearly caused a disaster because, while panicking, she would not move out of the doorway to let the firefighter through until I directed her. I tried to get her to meet the firefighter afterwards, but she thought it was more important to play darts. Christy, you're beginning to be a pain except for the days you go to work and bring home money!
  • 84. Asher made it to Mad Scientist and tries to look eccentric and dastardly, despite the fact that he is smiling and thinking about great grades. Sorry Asher, you just don't have the evil brillance of your troll daughters.
  • 85. Daisy wanted to have a party, so I gave her a fancy look for the occasion. Its awfully cute. Maybe she'll change back to red hair someday.
  • 86. Here's a good way to drive up party score.
  • 87. Ooh . . . here's another. This is Daisy's favorite, I think. Aren't they so cute with their matching red shirts?
  • 88. Daisy had such a rockin' party she slept well into the morning, and almost missed her bus. She literally ran, getting there right at 9. Ahhhhhhhhh.
  • 89. Oh yeah, and the headmaster came. Korey decided to snub the call for dinner in favor of playing chess by his onesies. Bah. So it took a while and a little fancy footwork, or should I say "shoo and distract" work, to get him to dinner, leaving little time for other pursuits. Luckily, Asher made his delicious salmon. Score: 49 food, 30 tour, 20 schmooze, with 40 min left. Both parents want Daisy to be an overachiever, so I figured I ought to probably get the kiddles in private school now.
  • 90. Asher wants to max all his skills (he has mech, cleaning, and logic maxed and cooking at 9) so this is where he can usually be found these days.
  • 91. But he also does a few shots of the ol' elixer here and there, as he is getting quite old and I'm not ready for him to be elderly yet.
  • 92. Daisy discovers that you can make friends really fast by being a little flirt. Sigh. Oh well, Ricky's a romance Sim, so he probably would have done it to her too. She'll be going to Uni soon, then all these teenage flings won't matter.
  • 93. Asher has been a pain in the plumbob lately. First, Christy had a great chance card that netted us 30 thousand simoleons, but then Asher's chance card lost 20 thousand of those. Then he decides he wants to be saved from death, which he has not wanted for a long, long time. So, I thought this would do it, but his mech skill is maxed, so apparently he is impervious to electrocution, or maybe in SimCity dishwashers don't use electricity, but instead use the power of "happy thoughts and unicorns." Oh, and please disregard the naked person taking a shower. I am a horrible, horrible photographer.
  • 94. So this is what it finally took to kill Asher. Luckily Christy was there, but it was a chore keeping her from catching on fire also.
  • 95. Christy begs for Asher's pitiful life. Man, Asher, you so owe us. We have to burn down the whole kitchen, make Christy distraught, and scare me that the whole place, and possibly Christy also, was going to go up in flames - just to get you here. If you want to die, next time you better be more flammable.
  • 96. Yeah, yeah, he's back. Alright, Asher, start sweeping - that's your mess!!
  • 97. After his burning, he used the Energizer, but then kept walking around with a cloud pouring off of him. Could it be . . . the unholy vapors of the afterlife still clinging to his mortal body? Hmmmmm.
  • 98. Hee hee, Christy looks like she's about to whack Asher with a cane or a crowbar or something. Way to go, Christy!!
  • 99. Remodeled the kitchen (what was left of it) but between Asher losing that 20 thou and replacing almost the entire kitchen, I was not in the mood to build an upstairs yet. The new kitchen is very swank, though.
  • 100. Aww, Daisy looks so cute in her uniform. On her way to fulfilling her parents' wish for her to be an Overachiever, Daisy finds a job in the Medical field, level 2 of course. Since everyone stopped desiring that before I could get her there, however, I think she only worked one day.
  • 101. I finally figured out how to get Uni installed!! Turns out I had a defective disk (which would explain EVERYTHING) so I took it back and got a new one that - wonder of wonders - works. Anyway, I sent Mr. Ricky Romance off to the penal colony, um, I mean, college, to get him and Daisy to break it off without losing their friendship. Daisy then worked her magic on Orlando Centowski, who declined to go steady with her but is not about to turn down a little sweet talk. He'll also get to go college someday, but only because Daisy desires it, and so far they haven't even talked once.
  • 102. Back to the present, let's check out how the rest of the family is doing. We'll eavesdrop on Darcy and Pao's conversation . . . " . . . well, yes, Pao, the police would arrest you for that. However, in a few days, when I turn into a teen and then get shipped off to college, it would be perfectly legal for us to . . ." WHOA DARCY!! Next picture . . .
  • 103. Christy is busy painting the creatures that will henceforth inhabit my nightmares. However, this was the first masterpiece that she sold. I was only too happy to get it out of the house!
  • 104. And Asher is *sigh* working his way up the medical career due to his midlife crisis - I mean, suddenly discovered lifetime want - to become Chief of Staff. Apparently he also felt that he just wasn't "up" to being a mad scientist.
  • 105. Christy has decided to be the difficult one once again and wants to marry 6 children off, despite the fact that she has three almost-grown children and is five days away from being an elder. Child #4 is on the way. This is so going to be a pain.
  • 106. Daisy wants to be Captain Hero. Thank you, Daisy, for being managaeble. You always were "the good one." I'm sure this is just a cover, since she is an evil overlord and all. Anyway, I send her to college to try my hand at Sim State before the heiress goes.
  • 107. Christy is upset - naturally, since she is a family sim. The really heartbreaking thing about this picture, though, is Asher's look as the cab leaves. He looks so . . . pensive. Maybe there is some substance beneath the veneer of Asher's clueless beefcake facade.
  • 108. And that's the end of the first chapter. Next one will be better, but now I leave you with a few questions to ponder in the meantime: *How will Daisy reconcile her evil streak with her desire to be a do-gooder, not to mention her ability to look this cute as a YA? *For the love of all things holy, how is Christy going to raise three more kids to adulthood and get all 6 of them married off in time? *Can she do it before I go totally crazy? *Will anyone ever care about Devon? He hasn't even been in the last several pictures! See you next time!

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